


Sunshine

by ViciousFlame



Series: Sunshine-verse [2]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: ASL, Angst, Attempted Brainwashing, Dadster, Death, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Frisk is Selectively Mute, Happily Ever After, Happy Ending, Implied Death, Kidnapping, Lullabies and Stories, Monsterphobia, Reader Is Not Frisk, Reader is Selectively mute, Reader-Insert, Referenced Death, Sickness, Swearing, That Happy Ending is Hard Won, The Void, chosen family, dark themes, gender neutral reader, it gets sad, major character death but it doesn't last, snuggles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-01
Updated: 2016-03-24
Packaged: 2018-05-17 13:05:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 26
Words: 83,975
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5870746
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ViciousFlame/pseuds/ViciousFlame
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When you were young you nearly died in an accident, and when you woke up you brought someone back with you. Your family did not take too well to the invisible man teaching you his language of hands.<br/>Years later you stumble into a little family who are more than happy to take you into their hearts.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You are my Sunshine

_ You are my sunshine, my only sunshine~ _

You hummed quietly to yourself as you walked home, shifting your bag of groceries to a more comfortable grip.  You glanced reflexively at a glass window as you passed, and smiled brighter at the familiar flicker of a black and white shape behind you.

You were well aware, mostly because your family had pointed it out as often as possible and your therapist tried to get the idea to stick, that most people’s imaginary friends tended to fade away into their imagination as they got older. That most people’s imaginary friends tended to stay imaginary and did not do things like teach you different languages to cope with your nonverbal days, or interact with the real world in a meaningful way at all.

But your friend was better than an imaginary friend in that he wasn’t imaginary at all.

When you were very young, you had been in an awful accident that nearly killed you.

That’s when he showed up.

He had been the first thing you’d seen when you woke up, an angel with a skeleton’s face.

It had taken a little bit of time, mostly spent teaching you his language of hands, before you were able to figure out who your angel was, but it had been worth it.

Gaster was the best thing to have happened to you.

When your voice locked up in your throat, when you couldn't even stutter a sentence out, Gaster’s language had given you a way to communicate.

There had been a little bit of issue when your family couldn't figure out how you’d learned sign language (And anytime you tried to tell them about Gaster they had dismissed you out of hand and honestly that’s when the therapy had started up, but no one could convince Gaster to leave you so you really didn’t mind anymore), but as long as you went to your weekly therapy sessions no one bothered you about Gaster too much.

You were so caught up in your thoughts of your best friend, and a few background ideas of what to make for dinner, that you didn’t see what was on the sidewalk in front of you until your legs were tangled in it.

You tripped and dropped your groceries, landing on your elbows, and rolling to avoid smashing your nose or teeth into the pavement.

After a moment of checking to make sure you hadn’t scraped anything and weren’t bleeding, you glanced to see what you had fallen over.

Or rather, who.

A child was watching you with wide, tear filled eyes. They were small, ten or twelve at the oldest, and seemed to have been sitting there for a little while if the tear tracks on their cheeks were anything to go by.

Something about this child was familiar, and Gaster was fully visible to you, standing over the child and beaming at them.

**Are you okay?** They signed hesitantly.

You sat up,  **No harm was done. Are you okay?** Your eyes darted to Gaster, who pointed meaningfully at the child and faded away.

The returned sign seemed to excite them as much as your response of being okay relieved them.

**I am F-r-i-s-k. Could you help me? I lost my family and my phone and I’m new here.** Frisk signed hopefully.

**Of course! Do you have a number you can call?** You grabbed your groceries out of the road where they had fallen and tucked them beside you as you sat across from Frisk, you signed your name at them and then added  **I have my cell phone and you can call them if you know the number.**

Frisk nodded, grinning brightly as you pulled your phone out and offered it to them.

Frisk dialed the number very carefully and you both waited for someone to pick up.

**Try again** , You advised when no one answered,  **They probably didn’t answer because it’s not a number they know.**

The lack of answer seemed to have reminded Frisk of something upsetting, though, because they had sagged and just stared at your phone despondently.

Very carefully you took the phone from them and tried the number again.

Only when someone answered the phone with a hesitant “Hello? This is Toriel.” Did you realize that, as someone who had no idea who you were, they probably wouldn't respond to your usual tactics of tapping the mic as an answer.

“H-hello,” You cleared your throat lightly as your voice broke, you hadn’t had to speak for awhile, “I f-found Frisk? They gave m-me this number…”

There was a loud clamor from the phone, as though four or five people had started yelling at once, and you yelped and yanked the phone from your ear.

The yelling seemed to wake Frisk from their moment of melancholy and they held their hands out for the phone hopefully.

You handed it back to them and, to your surprise, they tapped the mic like you usually did.

“Frisk!” You heard the woman who had answered exclaim, “My child, we were so worried about you! Where are you?”

Frisk glanced around the street and looked at you pleadingly.

“Uhm, M-Miss Toriel?” You leaned over so that you would be audible to the people on the phone, “We’re on s-seventh s-street? Near, uhm, Hope Avenue? F-frisk said that you were new to town so, uhm, if you know the Grocery store that’s p-painted purple? We’re just down the road from there.” You felt a prickle of frustration at your stumbling, but Frisk’s relieved expression made it a little bit easier to deal with.

“We know where that is,” Toriel seemed to be on the verge of tears, and seeing as her kid was sitting across from you in the street at six in the afternoon instead of with her where they belonged, you could understand why, “Would you mind terribly staying with Frisk until we got there?”

“Of c-course not!” You assured her, “I wouldn’t leave a k-kid alone!”

“Thank you so much, we will be there in just a moment.” Toriel hung up and left you alone with Frisk again.

**Thank you.** Frisk signed  **For calling them, and not making me talk.**

**You’re welcome** You signed back. You scooted over so you were sitting next to Frisk, and not blocking the flow of traffic, not that there was a lot right now. Your town wasn’t huge to begin with, and this area of town had gotten smaller after the monsters had come down from Mt Ebott and started to settle in the neighborhood. Not that you minded, the house next to you was now inhabited by a monster family and they were a lot nicer than the previous family had been. Not to mention that there were a lot more monster kids requesting a sign language translator at the library, which meant you were spending a lot less time putting books away and a lot more time in the story corner.

Thinking about your job reminded you where you’d seen Frisk before. They had come in with a small lizard monster with no arms the other week and checked out a few different books, including a surprising amount of Manga.

You thought there might be somewhere else you know them from, but decided it was probably from other visits to the library.

At some point during your musing Frisk had tucked their arms into their large sweater and they were snuggled into your side, eyes scanning back and forth on the road, presumably for any sight of their parent’s car. You were slightly confused at how comfortable they seemed with you, but you weren’t going to raise a fuss and upset the already worried child further.

As subtly as you could, you opened up a small window to the other space Gaster occupied and let you store things when you needed to, and pushed your bag of groceries into it. You didn’t want to let anything go bad, and there was no way you were leaving Frisk alone until their family had appeared.

You glanced down and smiled slightly at the determined expression on Frisk’s face, and then a familiar hand caught your attention.

You looked up from Frisk to see Gaster flickering in and out of reality excitedly.

**Soon. You’re almost back where you belong** . He signed at you  **This child is important. Keep them safe. I will see you soon.**

You frowned and started to raise your hands to ask what he meant, when he faded away again.

Slightly worried about what your constant companion meant by his more ambiguous than usual statement, you almost didn’t notice Frisk’s family arrive.

Almost.

Because actually missing their arrival would have been very difficult.

“PUNK!” A fish woman dove out of a red convertible and grabbed Frisk from your side and hefted them above her head, “What did you think you were doing?! NGAAAH WE WERE SCARED TO DEATH FRISK!”

“Undyne, please put Frisk down gently.” The voice from the phone, Toriel’s voice, came from a concerned goat woman who radiated a sensation of ‘mom’ who got out of the convertible with a great degree of poise.

“yeah undyne, let’s not take any  _ frisks _ with the kid.” 

Your heart stopped.

The skeleton had not been standing in front of you a second ago, you were fairly sure of it. He winked at you and you tried not to think too hard on how that was accomplished.

“FRISK. I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WISH TO ASSURE YOU THAT WE WERE ALL LOOKING EVERYWHERE FOR YOU.” Another Skeleton jumped out of the driver’s seat and scooped Frisk out of Undyne’s arms.

Slowly you stood, trying not to look like an idiot and fall when your legs protested the movement after being on the cold concrete for awhile. Sidewalks were not the best place to spend autumn afternoons.

“Thank you so much for finding Frisk and letting them use your phone.” Toriel was easily a foot and a half taller than you, and seemed to be all over sturdier than you, but this did not detract from her mom-like demeanor.

**It was no problem.** You assured her. Toriel’s eyes moved from your face to your hands as you signed and she smiled brightly.

“It was very kind of you, regardless. Will you come visit us for dinner? As my thanks?”

You rubbed the back of your neck awkwardly before signing back  **I wouldn’t want to impose, really…**

“HUMAN!” The tall skeleton, Papyrus, and boy he was just about as tall as Toriel (The other skeleton was only about eye height with your chin, and you weren’t exactly a paragon of height) Placed a hand on your shoulder, “I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WOULD ALSO LIKE TO THANK YOU FOR SAVING MY SMALL FRIEND, FRISK THE HUMAN. I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WOULD MAKE YOU SOME OF MY WORLD FAMOUS SPAGHETTI.”

“come on, kid, they’ll  _ noodle _ you until you give in.” The short skeleton grinned and held out a hand, “i’m sans, by the way. sans the skeleton.”

This seemed to be a reminder that you hadn’t been technically introduced to anyone, and they all sought to rectify this immediately.

“HEY! I’M UNDYNE!”

“Forgive me, I am Toriel, Frisk’s mother.”

“I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS.”

A tug on your sleeve revealed that Frisk had managed to get themself returned to the ground,  **Please come?** They signed hopefully.

Well, you’d have to be a real jerk to deny that face. Thankfully nothing would spoil while it was in Gaster’s Other Space, and it would be a little bit difficult to explain how groceries no one could see might spoil anyway. You smiled and signed a yes, much to Frisk’s excitement.

You found yourself and Frisk tucked in-between Sans and Undyne, while Papyrus drove and Toriel sat in the front.

“knock knock.”

You glanced over at San, surprised you’d been able to hear him so well despite Papyrus driving with the top down and just a little bit faster than was comfortable.

**Who’s there?** You signed expectantly.

“Anee.”

**Anee who?**

“Anee one you like.”

“SANSSSS.” Papyrus protested from the front, but Toriel started laughing and you couldn’t stop the grin that spread across your face.

**Knock Knock**

“who’s there?”

**Ya**

“ya who?”

**Wow, you seem excited to see me.**

Sans paused, and his grin seemed brighter.

“you’re okay, kid.”

Toriel, who had been watching the joke in the rearview mirror, turned around to give you a thumbs up, a bright smile on her face.

You glanced out to see where you were, and were surprised to see the houses going by were familiar. You were in your neighborhood, just a block away from your house actually, and as Papyrus pulled into a driveway you mused that at least your walk home wouldn’t be too far.

“hey.”

You glanced down at Sans, who pointed, “that’s papyrus and my house, that one is tori’s, and the one over there belongs to undyne and her girlfriend alphys. in case you were curious.”

You nodded in understanding and glanced at the house he had identified as his and Papyrus’s. And your brain had to reboot.

There was a foot of snow on top of the house. It was months before the first snowfall was due.

You looked at Sans slowly. He seemed to be waiting for you to ask.

**Why is there snow on your roof?**

“i’m too lazy to clean it off.”

You considered that for a moment as you narrowed your eyes at him.

Toriel lead you into her house and you were introduced to Undyne’s girlfriend, Alphys, while Toriel disappeared into her kitchen to finish dinner.

Sans pointed you over to the couch, “it’ll get a little bit crazy in here, that’s the safest spot… not that they’ll hurt you, but you wouldn’t want to get hit by anything flying by.”

You nodded your understanding to him and just watched the interactions of the monsters around you.

Undyne and Papyrus were talking animatedly about training, while Alphy had tugged Frisk to a line of movies next to the TV and was pointing to various ones and waiting for a negative or positive head shake.

It felt… comfortable.

Normally when you were forced into interacting with people outside of your job, you just felt awkward and forced, but even just standing in the eye of the storm you were swept up in a feeling of belonging.

Frisk waved you over and, with a glance at Sans, you walked over to join them.

**We’re looking at movies to watch after dinner.** Frisk signed,  **Which one do you like best?**

You weren’t really sure you were invited to movies after dinner, but you didn’t want Frisk to feel bad, so you looked over the movies they were presenting.

There were three movies about ‘Mettaton’, who you recognized as a robot that had pretty much taken over Hollywood since the monsters had come above ground, two Disney movies and…

Without hesitation you reached out and tapped ‘Full Metal Alchemist: The Star of Milos’, figuring if Frisk had the movie, and had chosen it as an option, there wouldn't be an issue with watching it.

“Y-you like Full Metal Alchemist?” Alphys asked excitedly, “It’s not as great as Mew Mew Kissy Cutie, but Frisk and I watch it together all the time!”

**I watched the original series as a kid** , You signed at her,  **So when they remade the series I had to watch it. I like Mew Mew, too, but I haven’t had a chance to watch it lately.**

An ominous shadow fell over you, and you glanced over your shoulder to see Undyne watching you intently.

“You’re a Nerd!” She declared, but there was no hostility in her voice just excitement, “That’s PERFECT! ANIME IS THE BEST!”

Frisk clapped at your side and Undyne grabbed your head and wrestled you under her arm and gave you a fierce noogie. You managed to wrestle away from her, laughing, and for a moment you were filled with the warmest glow you could imagine.

You glanced around, expecting to see Gaster watching you with the faint fond smile he always wore when you were genuinely happy, but he was nowhere to be seen.

Your smile dimmed slightly.

“hey, you alright?” Sans was suddenly at your side again, and you blinked down at him, surprisingly not startled.

**I’m fine** You assure him,  **Had a thought, it’s gone now.**

Sans nodded, and Toriel chose that moment to come out and call everyone to dinner.

Dinner was very fun, very animated as opposed to your usual sitting at the table and reading a book, or signing about your day to Gaster if he was there. You realized you were eating monster food very quickly, but after a moment to adjust to the slight difference between monster food and human food it was easy to enjoy. Toriel was a great cook.

After dinner Alphys and Frisk darted into the front room and Papyrus followed them with an excited yell.

You started helping Toriel pick up the dishes, but she gently took them from you and pointed you to the door, “Thank you, child, I appreciate the gesture, but you are the guest tonight. Please enjoy the movies with the others.”

“Yeah, Nerd! Come watch the movie with us!” Undyne grabbed you and tossed you over one shoulder.

“come on undyne, don’t get _ carried away _ with the human.”

“SANS PLEASE,” Papyrus groaned as Undyne suplexed you into the couch.

Gently.

Kind of.

Nothing was broken.

“sorry bro, i just wanted to  _ lift _ their spirits.”

“SANS NO.”

You bit your lip hard, you’d done well not to react to the puns thus far but every pun that Sans made inched you closer and closer to retaliating.

And you didn’t want to get carried away, not after last time.

Emma still wouldn’t look you in the eye.

Movies with the monster family was unlike any movie night you’d had before.

With your family movies had tended to be quiet, almost solemnly quiet.

The few times you’d tried to have movie night with friends it had either been painfully awkward, or there had been several people there who talked through the movie without watching it.

Movie night with the monsters was animated.

Undyne cheered and jumped up in righteous fury. Papyrus clapped, or got up and ran around the couch shouting encouragements for the characters on screen. Alphys spent a decent amount of time trying to keep Undyne on the couch, but even she was prone to jumping up and freaking out in tense moments. Frisk tried to imitate some of Ed’s more impressive acrobatics, and honestly succeeded very well.

Sans laughed.

You’d almost expected his laugh to be quiet, a little huff like you were prone to doing, but it wasn’t. It was full, and loud, and made you smile too.

You found yourself so caught up in the movie, and with everyone, that it was more like you were living the movie than watching it, eventually getting caught up with Undyne and Frisk, with the movie paused, trying to work out exactly how to bounce off the wall  _ just right  _ to copy the character on screen.

It was more fun than you’d had in a very long time.

When the movie ended it was like someone settled a blanket of contentedness around everyone. There was a nearly audible sigh from the room.

“I’m afraid it is time for Frisk to go to bed.” Toriel said, watching them all with a smile from the kitchen door. With a slight jump you glanced at your watch and were surprised to see it was nine thirty.

You’d spent well over three hours in the monster home.

“Dear?” Toriel caught your eye, “It has been wonderful having you here, please feel free to visit at anytime.”

“Yeah Nerd!” Undyne jumped up from the couch again, “You have to join us for Anime Night next Friday! You said you haven’t watched Mew Mew Kissy Cutie in awhile, right? Well we’re starting it at season one this Friday!”

You looked into the eager faces of Undyne and Frisk, and the hopeful face of Alphys, and nodded happily.

**I’ll be there!**

You walked out with the others, listening to Aphys and Undyne talk excitedly about Anime Night dress code (Pajamas, because it was a sleepover) Rules of Etiquette (No Spoilers, apparently this would be Papyrus’s first time watching Mew Mew Kissy Cutie) And when it started (Six, but they’d be up until nine since it was a weekend and Frisk didn’t have to get up the next day.)

“HUMAN! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WOULD BE MORE THAN HAPPY TO DRIVE YOU HOME!” Papyrus announced when you were waving at Undyne and Alphys as they made their way into their home.

You blinked at him,  **Oh no Papyrus, I live just down the block. You don’t need to do that.**

“it’s okay pap, i’ll walk them home.” Sans assured his brother. “wouldn’t want them to get  _ bonely _ on their walk home.”

“OH MY GOD SANS.”

**Really, I don’t want to be a bother.** You signed at them.

Sans chucked and held something out to you.

Curiously you reached out and took it.

It was a bottle of glue.

You raised an eyebrow at the smaller skeleton.

“you’re our friend now, i’m just letting you know you’re  _ stuck _ with us.”

Papyrus threw his hands in the air in defeat.

You nodded solemnly and handed the glue back  **Seems like a** **_glue_ ** **’d thing to me.**

Sans’s grin grew, “it’s an important  _ bond _ .”

**That’s a** **_tacky_ ** **way to put it.**

“it’s a _ cohesive _ relationship.”

“YOU TWO ARE LITERALLY THE WORST.”

“sorry paps, it’s a bit of a  _ sticky _ situation to leave off in the middle of a pun off.”

“SANS, THAT STATEMENT,” Papyrus seemed to fight with himself, then grinned at you both “RESIN-ATES WITH ME.”

You gave Papyrus a double thumbs up.

“good one bro.”

“THANK YOU. HUMAN, IT REALLY WOULD BE NO BOTHER TO DRIVE YOU HOME.”

**It really is fine Papyrus, I enjoy the walk.** You assured him.

After a little bit more assurance you finally managed to start off in the direction of home, a bright smile lighting up your face as you walked.

“hey, you almost forgot me.”

Sans was, again inexplicably, at your side.

**You don’t have to, I don’t want to inconvenience you...**

“it’s no inconvenience, and i promised papyrus i’d walk you home so he didn’t have to worry.”

**He’s sweet** . You signed, slowly starting back in the direction of your home, unable to help the grin that spread across your face at the thought of the happy, excitable skeleton.

“yeah, my bro’s the best.” There was no trace of sarcasm in his voice, just pure adoration, and that made you smile a little brighter.

You chatted idly with Sans as you walked until you finally came to a stop in front of your house.

You found yourself very reluctant to go in.

“hey, i was serious earlier. you’re our friend now, so you’re stuck with us.” Sans assured you.

**I’ll hold you to that** . You signed around your groceries,  **I’ll see you later Sans.**

“later.” Sans waved at you and you walked into the house, humming quietly to yourself.

And missed the flash of emotion that crossed Sans’s face as you went inside.


	2. Glad You Came

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day after you make new friends your life starts to change

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my gosh you guys, you'll all so nice and I pretty much had to hide under a blanket every time you left a comment. You inspired me so much that when I was editing this chapter I was super inspired and maybe kind doubled it in length? So that's all on you, just so you know. Thank you so much!

The next day you were still in a good mood from meeting Frisk’s family. There was an added bounce in your step as you retrieved your groceries from Gaster’s Other Space and quickly put them away before packing yourself lunch and setting it on the counter.

You kept an eye out for Gaster, wanting to ask him about his odd comments about Frisk the previous day and tell him about how much fun you’d had with the family, but he didn’t appear even as you set out for work.

Your shoulders slumped a bit as you walked the familiar path to the library, your mood dropping. Gaster did occasionally disappear for a few days at a time, but it was never fun for you when he did. You weren’t sure where he went in those times, you hadn’t even managed to find him in his Other Space the few times you had gone in yourself.

Which, honestly, you preferred not to do. You were always afraid when you went into the Other Space that you wouldn't be able to get out without anyone on this side to bring you back. Gaster promised he could get you out if you got stuck, but you knew how hard it was for your friend to interact with this world and didn’t want to cause him any extra stress.

“You okay there?” You looked up, startled, as you nearly ran into the Head Librarian, David as he opened the door for you.

“S-sorry B-bossman.” You offered sheepishly.

“Deep thoughts?” He prompted.

You nodded.

David didn’t understand ASL, but when he’d interviewed you he had called in Pamela, the libraries on site tech expert, to translate for you so you could be comfortable. He was the best boss you could ask for.

“Alright, well don’t get lost.” He winked at you, “Do me a favor and try to work returns today? They’re starting to pile up, and you know how Emma gets. We were pretty busy Saturday.”

You nodded to him and David disappeared into his office.

The library didn’t open until eight, when you got in, but David started work around seven. David practically kept the library afloat himself after the initial budget was cut when the part of town the library was in became almost all monster, but now that things with monsters were slowly evening out the budget was rising again. You, yourself, had donated more than a few paychecks to the library. You didn’t necessarily have to work, but the savings were nice and the job itself was part of your family's condition for continuing to support you.

You knew David like the silence of the early morning, but there was something about the library being empty that was almost sad to you.

To combat the silence you started humming as you retrieved one of the return carts, frowning slightly as you counted the other two carts and the full return box. You’d been translating stories all day Friday and neither Emma nor your part time counterpart Sora enjoyed handling returns so things were pretty backed up.

Speaking of the devil. Emma walked in and tried to hide a full body wince at the sight of you. You waved guiltily at her and wheeled the returns cart towards the fantasy sections.

About a week ago Emma had made a remark about a group of High School students and all the chairs they’d crowded around a table. You had been in a particularly good mood and responded with almost two hours straight of chair related puns every time she came near you.

Ever since then she’d been avoiding you. Apparently some people reacted really badly to puns in that volume.

For the next few hours you dedicated yourself to putting a dent in the returns, trying to focus and not let your hopes get up every time you saw a flicker of black out of the corner of your eye. It was never Gaster, and you felt your spirits sinking lower and lower at the continued lack of your friend's presence.

“Hey!” A familiar voice caught your attention as you tucked  Nightshade by Shea Godfrey into the romance section. You turned just a second before Undyne scooped you up in a hug.

“H-hello Undyne.” You smiled at her, your arms trapped at your side.

“‘Sup Nerd! Frisk said they thought you worked here.” Undyne put you down.

“Y-yeah, I do.” You agreed.

“That’s awesome! So I bet you know where everything is in here, huh?” She beamed at you.

“M-mostly…”

Her expression softened, “Hey nerd, it’s alright. You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to. We all know sign language for Frisk’s sake, we don’t mind if you don’t want to talk.”

You relaxed slightly.  **I feel bad sometimes because not everyone understands…**

“No worries nerd! If you run into someone who doesn’t understand just come find one of us and we’ll help!” Undyne assured you with another huge grin.

Your mood picked back up and you returned her bright grin with a more timid but no less meaningful smile.

“Oh, right, I came in here for a reason!” Undyne remembered, “Do you have any piano music in here by chance?”

You furrowed your brow for a moment, then grinned. There was actually an entire row of sheet music for various instruments in the back that had been started after some local music teachers donated a lot of their sheet music. David had gladly expanded on it, adding more difficult pieces so that people who wanted to learn could find more and more challenging pieces.

**Follow me!** You signed to her, abandoning your returns cart, grabbing Undyne’s wrist and tugging her to the right area of the library.

**Here,** you tapped the appropriate shelf  **This and the two shelves below it are all Piano music.**

“Wow!” Undyne practically vibrated in excitement, “This is the best! There are so many songs!”

You nodded, happy with her enthusiasm.

“Do you play anything?” Undyne asked curiously.

You shook your head, a blush rising in your cheeks  **No, I have tried in the past but my… fingers can’t keep up with what I’m seeing and I get frustrated with myself. I like to sing sometimes, though.**

“You’ll have to sing for us sometimes! I had a friend in the Underground, Skyren, she was the same way! I taught her piano, but she liked to sing! She tours with Mettaton, now, as his backup singer.” Undyne reminisced.

“Uhm…” You glanced over to see Emma hesitating at the entrance to the aisle, “There’s… David was wondering if you were free to translate? He’s starting story time for the kids and there’s…”

You nodded to Emma,  **I’ll be right there,** You signed slowly for her benefit.

“I’ll let you get back to work.” Undyne grinned at you, “I should be going, too, I’m on my lunch break but I have a class as soon as it’s over.”

**Piano class?** You asked curiously.

“Fuhuhuhu, no. I’m the gym teacher at Toriel’s school!” Undyne declared, striking a pose, “I can bench press seven kids!”

You gave Undyne two thumbs up and made your way to the kids section where David was choosing what to read by a poll of hands.

“How’re the returns going?” David asked with a smile, placing the losing books to the side.

“I g-got a c-cart down.” You smiled tentatively at him.

“Great job.” David assured you and opened the book for the kids. For the next little bit you let yourself just enjoy watching the rapturous enjoyment on the faces of a small tree monster, a tiny whimsum, a bunny, a cat, and three human children as David read them  I’ll Love You Forever and you followed along for the one human child and two monster children who couldn’t hear your boss’s voice.

“Hey, isn’t it your lunch time?” David asked when story time devolved into craft time.

You glanced at the clock and were surprised to see it was several minutes past twelve thirty, your usual lunch time, and shot David a sheepish smile.

“Go on, Pamela’s updating the virus software on the computers so if one of the little ones has a question I’ll snag her.” He assured her.

You made your way to the break room and paused in front of the refrigerator, thinking back to this morning and making your lunch.

And leaving it on the counter.

You snorted and shook your head, it would definitely make lunch a little rushed, but you could make it home, eat, and get back before your lunch break was over. You turned around and walked out the front door.

Straight into someone.

“HUMAN!”

You glanced up in surprise,  **Papyrus! I’m so sorry-**

“IT IS NO PROBLEM HUMAN! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE BROUGHT YOU SOME FRIENDSHIP SPAGHETTI AND HAVE COME TO RETRIEVE YOUR PHONE NUMBER! FRISK REMINDED US THIS MORNING THAT WE HAD NOT RECEIVED IT AND THUS COULD NOT ADD YOU TO OUR TEXTING GROUP!” Papyrus handed you a container of what looked like spaghetti.

**Thank you Papyrus, you didn’t have to.** You blushed and beamed up at him, you dug around in your pocket until you found your phone and offered it to him.

Papyrus happily typed for a few seconds and then handed it back. You found you had a new contact for ‘THE GREAT PAPYRUS’ and a few seconds later you found yourself added to a group conversation.

**Would you like to have lunch with me Papyrus?** You signed to him around the container of Spaghetti.

“WHILE I WOULD LOVE TO SPEND LUNCHTIME WITH MY NEW HUMAN FRIEND, I MUST TAKE SANS HIS LUNCH AS WELL OR HE WILL WORK THROUGH HIS LUNCH,” Papyrus sighed, then frowned slightly, “OR, RATHER, HE WILL SLEEP THROUGH HIS LUNCH.”

You giggled and nodded to him.

Lunch issue solved you turned around and made your way back to the break room to grab one of the plastic forks that David kept on hand for similar situations to this.

Papyrus’s spaghetti was… interesting. It definitely wasn’t bad, but there were some flavors in there that you weren’t expecting...and glitter. Edible, sweet glitter.

More interesting than your lunch, though, was the series of texts that began to barrage your phone before you even sat down.

You quickly figured out Frisk and Undyne by reading through the messages. Apparently Papyrus had added you in the middle of a discussion between Undyne and Frisk about the best way to deal with bullies, and you caught up just as they involved you in the discussion.

_ Frisk: No no Undyne, all I have to do is wink and blow a kiss and they stop! _

_ Undyne: Punk! You should be showing them the passion of your fury! Not the Passion of your... Passion! _

_ Frisk: ;) trust me Undyne. _

_ Undyne: Nerd! Back me up here, the punk shouldn't be getting rid of bullies by flirting! Unless that flirting also involves fists. _

You stared at the texts thoughtfully.

_ You: How do you flirt with your fists? _

_ Undyne: PASSIONATELY _

You grinned and glanced up to make sure no one saw you laughing at your phone like a crazy person.

_ You: If it works, then it works. _

_ Frisk: See Undyne! Flirt is the best Action! _

_ Undyne: Well we all know you aren’t a fighter punk, so I guess it’s okay if you flirt. _

_ Undyne: Hey nerd, How much of that sheet music can I take at a time? I’m teaching the punk to play piano and I forgot to ask you earlier. _

_ You: Six books is the library limit. _

_ xxx-xxx-xxxx: Oh, you work at the library? I sent Frisk there for Manga the other week… do you know if we can ask for special books? (^・ω・^ ) _

You frowned thoughtfully at the message for a moment, trying to figure out who it could be.

_ You: Of course, we can ask other libraries for a loan, or I could ask the boss to order it for us. _

_ xxx-xxx-xxxx: Do you think you could order the Mew Mew Kissy Cutie manga?  _

_ =( ^ >w< ^)= _

Triumphantly you added the number to a contact for Alphys.

_ You: We actually have it Alphys, I have books 1-10 in the return cart if you’d like me to set it aside for you? _

_ Alphys: THAT WOULD BE AMAZING (^=˃v˂) _

_ You: I’ll set it aside with a note that it’s for you, you can come pick it up anytime =) _

A glance at the clock warned you that if you didn’t get a move on you’d be left with no time to finish your spaghetti. You set your phone aside, but kept an eye on it in case someone directed a question to you, but the conversation shifted to Frisk asking what the differences between the Mew Mew Manga and the Anime were.

Then a new text came in a separate conversation.

_ xxx-xxx-xxxx: when does a skeleton laugh? _

You tapped the table for a moment.

_ You: Why does a skeleton laugh, Sans? _

_ Sans: When someone tickles their funny bone. _

You grinned and picked up your phone and the container so you could wash it.

_ You: What happened to the pirate ship in the sea full of sharks? _

_ Sans: what? _

_ You: It came back with a skeleton crew. _

_ Sans: that’s a good one, kid. _

You grinned at you phone, the feeling of belonging from the previous night flooding back with gusto.

“Someone’s in a good mood.” David noted as you passed him on your way back to the returns cart you had abandoned when Undyne showed up.

You just nodded at him, unsure how to voice the feelings swelling in your chest. You retrieved the returns cart and snagged all of the Mew Mew Kissy Cutie books in the cart and setting them behind the checkout desk with a stickie note marked ‘For Alphys’. It was a common enough occurrence for a patron to call in and ask you to set aside a book until they could get in that you didn’t have to worry about Emma or David letting them go to the wrong person.

That done you started back to your return cart, when you noticed David standing in the break room with the angriest expression on his face you’d ever seen your boss wear.

Concerned you slipped into the break room and looked at what he was watching.

The small TV was on a news channel, and as you walked in the screen switched from the pristinely dressed anchorman to a figure wearing dark clothes and a mask.

“Until that traitor to humanity the monsters call Ambassador is turned over to us, and the monsters return below ground, we will not stop.” A heavily synthesized voice warned before there was a switch back to the smartly dressed anchorman.

David stormed over and turned the TV off with a growl. 

“W-what was that?” You asked softly.

“Purity for Above.” David grumbled, “Terrorists. They killed a man who was defending a monster and then released that video. They’re asking us to condone turning a  _ child  _ over to them and then condemn a whole race belowground for the  _ second time. _ People like that deserve the worst in life.”

You felt sickness rise in your throat. You’d heard about Purity for Above, seen more than a little of their hate propaganda reported on the news, and to hear they were demanding for the ambassador for monsters to be turned over to them…

The Ambassador who was just a child…

Something clicked and you realized you hadn’t just seen Frisk at the library. You’d also caught sight of them on TV a few times, giving speeches for monsters or shaking hand with politicians.

No wonder Toriel had been so panicked when she answered the phone.

No wonder Undyne had reacted so intensely.

If you hadn’t found Frisk last night, who knows who would have recognized them.

You felt an unfamiliar fierceness build up in your chest at the thought of anyone hurting Frisk and had to take a steadying breath.

You realized your boss was still glaring death at the blank TV and placed a hand on his shoulder. He looked at you, the glare lessening.

“No one is going to turn that kid over to those disgusting animals.” You told him in the most firm tone you’d ever used with anyone, let alone David.

His expression eased off a lot and he gave you a considering look, “You almost sound like you’d fight that entire terrorist organization yourself before letting them get to the kid.” He remarked with a soft smile.

Rather than answer vocally, you just nodded and went back to returning books to the shelf, not seeing the thoughtful look David wore as he watched you.

It took you a little bit to get back into the rhythm of putting books away again, slightly shaken by your realization that your new friends were more important than you had counted on, but you finally got back into the swing of things, pulling your phone out occasionally to keep up on what was happening in the group text.

( _ THE GREAT PAPYRUS: UNDYNE YOU SHOULD NOT BE ENCOURAGING FRISK TO TEXT IN CLASS YOU ARE A TEACHER! _

_ Undyne: It’s STEALTH training Papyrus! If the punk gets caught by the human teachers Toriel has hired then they OBVIOUSLY need MORE TRAINING! _

_ Frisk: It’s okay Pap I am the master of Stealth and Flirting.) _

Honestly, while you loved your job at the library and days tended to pass quickly because of this, you’d never had a day speed by so fast before. Between your thoughts and the enjoyment you got from the texts time sped past. Before you knew it, it was after three thirty.

You managed to figure this little detail out when Frisk slammed into you full force, hugging you in between shelves.

“F-frisk?” You asked, finding your arms pinned to your sides for the second time today.

**You gave Papyrus your number! You texted us!** Frisk signed excitedly, hopping away.

**Yes.** You raised an eyebrow at him,  **Did you expect differently?**

**You didn’t have to.** Frisk was smiling so widely their eyes were slits,  **You could have ignored us, or decided not to be our friend because my family are monsters.**

**I happen to think your family is made up of the coolest people ever, being monsters is just an added benefit.** You assured Frisk, tapping them lightly on the nose,  **I also know, from following a certain conversation, that you should be starting a history paper.**

Frisk made a face,  **Do you know anything about the war for indepence? Because I know it happened and that’s it.**

You checked your watch,  **You’re in luck Frisky Business, I’m due a break and I know a lot about that particular war.**

You waved Frisk off to a table made specifically for the purpose of studying students and readers, idly noting as several other monsters joined them, including the lizard monster from the other week, and noted your break time on David’s timekeeping sheet.

“You taking a break?” David asked curiously.

You nodded at him, and David beamed.

“Good you didn’t take a morning break so feel free to take a long one.”

You grinned in response and grabbed a couple of books off the shelf on your way over to Frisk.

You spent half an hour embroiled in the politics and silly stories of the war as you guided Frisk through it and helped them, and several of their monster friends, set up their essays. When your half an hour was up you went back to work, but managed to stay close enough that the group at the table could flag you down if they needed help.

At five Frisk and their friends packed everything up. Frisk promised to be back tomorrow as Toriel stepped cautiously into the library, looking around curiously. Her expression lit up as she caught sight of you two.

“Frisk, my child! And our new friend, how are you doing today?”

**I am doing well Toriel, thank you.** You signed happily to her.

“I hope you do not mind, but I had your phone number from yesterday and I added you to my contacts?” Toriel asked gently, “I know Papyrus stopped by today to get your number, but I try to stay out of the group conversations to give my child deniability. I did want a way to get in contact with you, though.”

**I don’t mind.** You told her shyly,  **I have your number in my history, so I can add you to my contacts as well?**

“Please do!” Toriel assured you, “You seem like a very sweet person and it is always nice to make new friends!”

You nodded enthusiastically at her and told yourself to remember to take Toriel’s number from your history later.

**I…** You hesitated slightly,  **I really enjoyed the pie you baked last night. I was wondering if you wanted to trade recipes sometime? I have a cookie recipe that people have told me is pretty okay.**

Toriel’s face lit up, “Oh child, I would love to. I do love my friends, but I don’t really have anyone who likes baking like I do.”

You lit up,  **I love baking, I would love to bake with you sometime.** You signed hopefully.

“We will have to arrange a recipe swap and bake day.” Toriel pressed a kiss to your forehead.

Beaming, you waved goodbye to Frisk and Toriel as they left the Library. With a sad sigh and a stretch, you turned back to the seemingly never-ending pile of returns, though thankfully much reduced from the ridiculousness it had been this morning.

With just an hour of work left, you polished off the returns as best you could. There were still a few as patrons came and turned them in, but you managed to stay on top of it enough that you’d be able to focus on other tasks tomorrow. At five fifty five you went back into the break room and tucked Papyrus’s Tupperware in your book bag, resolving to return it to him tomorrow.

Tonight, however, you needed to pop back to the store. You had forgotten to buy honey and a few other small things yesterday and it would be better to grab them today rather than run out completely and regret not having them over the week.

“Bye D-david.” You said softly as your boss locked the library doors behind you.

“Have a good night! See you bright and early tomorrow.” David waved you off.

You peeked at your texts as you walked, but the group had gone silent.

_ Sans: how do skeletons call their friends? _

_ You: On their cellbones? _

_ Sans: you got it. what does a skeleton call their friend? _

_ You: I don’t know? _

_ Sans: verta-bruh, cause they always got your back. _

You covered your mouth and snickered as you turned into the grocery store parking lot.

_ You: That’s awful Sans. _

_ Sans: what can i say, i’m a pun-ishing guy. _

_ You: That one was pun-ful. _

_ Sans: you enjoyed it, don’t fibula to me. _

_ You: It was okay Tibia honest. _

You grabbed a basket and hung it on your left arm as you continued to text Sans, navigating the aisles by memory.

_ Sans: what kind of plate does a skeleton eat off of? bone china _

_ You: Why didn’t the skeleton see the scary movie? He didn’t have the guts. _

_ Sans: what kind of art do skeletons like? skulltures _

You grinned and glanced up to orient yourself. You were in the produce area, and to your delight you saw Papyrus staring thoughtfully at a pile of oranges. You took a step in his direction when something behind him caught your attention.

A man in his thirties was glaring at Papyrus darkly and his hand was clenched tightly around something. As you watched he raised his hand and you realized with a start that he was holding a rock.

The man was going to throw a rock at Papyrus in the middle of the grocery store.

That man was going to  _ throw a rock  _ at  _ Papyrus. _

“Don’t you dare!”

Part of you was surprised you could even get that loud, but sure enough your furious yell cut through the whole store and left several customers staring at you in confusion, including Papyrus. You didn’t have eyes for anyone but the grey eyed man who was ignoring you.

Without conscious thought you burst into a sprint and tackled the man as his hand came forward to throw. The unexpected projectile rocketing into him halted his throw and man and rock hit the floor with you on top.

You sat on top of the man and glared at him, “How d-dare you?!” You spat venomously, “Try to throw a r-rock at anyone! P-papyrus wasn’t hurting anyone you a-asshole!”

“Human?” Papyrus’s voice was subdued as he looked from you to your furious captive in concern.

You looked back at the tall skeleton and scrambled to your feet, “P-papyrus! Are y-you o-okay h-h-h-he-” You bit your lip as your mouth refused to cooperate with your brain,  **Are you okay Papyrus? He didn’t hit you, did he?**

Papyrus’s eyes widened in horror and he reached for you, but not before the heavy strike hit you in the side of the head.

You reeled and the world spun. The furious man you had tackled was glaring death at you, the rock still held tightly in the hand he’d hit you with.

“You’re a traitor to humanity, taking that thing's side.” He snarled before he turned tail and ran away.

“Human?!” Papyrus caught you as you staggered, staring after him, “Human, Are You Okay?!”

“ ‘m kay.” You assured him, blinking through the stars.

“What’s happening over here?” The manager of the store stormed over, eyeing you, Papyrus, and the other shoppers, “What just happened?”

“That man, the one who just ran out,” An older man was turning red, indignant on your behalf, “Was going to throw a rock at the skeleton. That young person stopped them and got a good knock in the head for it.”

“Are you okay?” The manager asked you carefully as the other shoppers agreed with the older man, “Do you need a doctor?”

You shook your head, even as the move made you dizzy. You hated going to the doctor.

“I’m afraid I’m going to need you to make a police report. Please come with me, and you as well sir, since it seems like you were indirectly involved.” The manager addressed Papyrus.

“Of Course, The Great Papyrus Would Not Leave His Friend When They Have Been Injured Defending Him.” Papyrus assured the manager, still watching you in concern, “Human, Are You Sure You Do Not Require The Skills Of A Doctor?”

**I’m fine Papyrus.** You assured him, lightly touching the spot you’d been hit and wincing slightly. Your fingers came away without any blood on them, so you were pretty sure you’d be okay. With Papyrus’s steadying hand on your shoulder you retrieved the basket and your bag and phone, which you had barely registered dropping in your wild actions before following the manager to his office.

You were a little surprised at yourself, you definitely weren’t going to let Papyrus get hit by that rock but you’d never done anything like tackle another person before, nor had you ever yelled at someone like that. You honestly don’t think you’d ever yelled at anyone at all before this.

“Would you like any water or anything? I’m sorry, but company policy means I have to have a police officer come and make a report on this before I can let you go.” The manager explained.

Papyrus watched you, “I Think My Friend Would Benefit From A Glass Of Water.” He told the manager.

“I’ll grab that for you while I call the cops.” The manager sighed and stepped out of the office.

“Human?” Papyrus asked gently, still in that subdued voice he’d been using since you got hit, “Did… Did You Tackle That Man Because You Thought He Was Going To Hurt Me?”

**He was going to throw a rock at you Papyrus.** You signed slowly,  **I couldn’t let him do that.**

Papyrus seemed touched, and you used the moment of peace to rub your temples and try to fight off the encroaching headache.

“Here you go,” The manager, you took a moment to eye his name badge -Rob-, offered you a plastic cup of water, and was followed by an officer, “We lucked out, there was an officer in the parking lot. I just need to grab some contact info while you guys speak with them.”

“Hello there, my name is Officer Hailey Doyle. Would you mind explaining what happened this evening?” Officer Doyle watched you with gentle eyes.

Man you did not want to stutter this story out, you thought morosely to yourself as Rob excused himself.

“Excuse Me, Officer, I Am The Great Papyrus And This Is My Friend,” Papyrus introduced you, “The Have Some Difficulties Speaking Occasionally. Do You Know Sign Language?”

“Hello Papyrus, I’m afraid I don’t know sign language.” Officer Doyle spoke to Papyrus like an adult speaking to a child and you felt yourself bristle slightly.

“For My Friend’s Benefit Would You Mind If I Translated?” Papyrus didn’t seem to mind.

Officer Doyle considered you two, “As long as your friend agrees that you are translating accurately I don’t mind.”

You smiled at Papyrus with Warmth and nodded at the Officer.

You began your story, explaining how you had been texting a friend and come around the corner to see the man preparing to throw the rock at Papyrus, how you had shocked yourself by yelling but he hadn’t stopped his actions. You blushed and the added blood made your head pound as you explained that you had tackled the man to prevent him from throwing that rock at Papyrus, and gotten hit in the head when you turned your back on the threat. It was the man’s parting words that seemed to catch the officer’s attention though.

“I’m sorry Papyrus, can I have you repeat what your friend said again?”

Papyrus glanced at you as you signed the words again.

“ ‘You’re a traitor to humanity, taking that thing’s side.’ ” Papyrus repeated.

**You aren’t a thing though, Papyrus. You’re a better person than he is.** You signed furiously.

“What was that?” Officer Doyle was watching you.

“My Friend Was Just Reassuring Me I Was Not A Thing.” Papyrus was blushing, or you think he was. An orange tint had risen in his cheekbones.

Officer Doyle nodded and glanced back at her notes, “Well, based on his parting comments, I’m assuming this man is a member of Purity for Above. They tend to express similar statements when confronted about their actions by other humans.” She wrote a few more words and capped her pen, “I’m not going to give you a ticket for attacking him since you were defending your friend, and as he ran away after assaulting you I’m fairly certain he won’t press charges. If, for some reason, he does press charges, please get in contact with me as Mr. Rob has collected the names and numbers of several witnesses and will be giving them to me for my report.” She handed you her card, “Here’s my number if you need it. Honestly, I would advise you press assault charges if you feel up to it.”

You took the card and pulled your wallet out of your book bag and tucked it into one of the card sleeves.

“Hey?” You glanced up at the soft tone Officer Doyle was using, “Give me a call if you see that guy again, too? There’s no need for more decent people to die to those animals.”

You blushed and nodded.

“Friend?” Papyrus placed a gloved hand on your arm, “You Are Not In Danger Because Of Me, Are You?”

**Not at all Papyrus.** You assured him, mostly truthfully. You never would have let that guy throw a rock at a monster. You might not have reacted so violently if it had been any monster other than Papyrus, but in the end you had no doubt you would garner the enmity of your assailant and Purity for Above. So really you were in danger because you weren’t an awful person and it wasn’t Papyrus’s fault at all.

“Thank you for being cooperative about all of this,” Rob said as he walked you and Papyrus out of his office after Officer Doyle had poked her head out and flagged him down to indicate, “You’d be surprised how people react to giving statements to the cops. I took care of your groceries while you spoke with Officer Doyle, I felt like it was only fair since you were both attacked.”

“Th-thank you.” You murmured, feeling very drained all of a sudden.

Papyrus eyed you thoughtfully and scooped you up without warning.

“P-p-p-papyrus!” You flailed slightly.

“THANK YOU FOR YOUR KINDNESS MANAGER HUMAN, BUT I WILL BE TAKING MY FRIEND HOME NOW AS THEY APPEAR TO BE VERY TIRED.” Papyrus took the grocery bag with your honey and started towards the entrance of the store.

“You two take care now.” Rob waved them off.

**You don’t have to carry me, Papyrus, I’m okay I promise.** You signed guiltily.

“IT IS ALRIGHT HUMAN, I WILL DRIVE YOU HOME SO YOU DO NOT HAVE TO EXHAUST YOURSELF ANY FURTHER.” Papyrus assured you, then lowered his voice slightly, “You Wish To Insist On Walking Home, But I Would Feel Better If I Was Able To Ascertain You Made It Home Safely.”

You sighed and allowed Papyrus to tuck you in his car and settle your groceries next to you. If anyone tried to tell you that Papyrus wasn’t a great manipulator you would laugh at them. Laugh for days.

You leaned your head back against the seat and against your will your eyes slid shut, the adrenaline rush that had seen you through the police report fading away now that you absolutely knew you and Papyrus were safe.

“Human?”

With a jerk your eyes shot open and you looked around, realizing guiltily that you had dozed off. A glance out the window showed that you were in your neighborhood.

“I Remembered You Said You Lived Nearby, But I’m Afraid I Do Not Know Where You Live.” Papyrus said apologetically.

**It’s perfectly okay Papyrus, I shouldn't have dozed off on you.** You signed guiltily,  **I live on Oak Street, about two and a half blocks away from you and the others.**

“I KNOW WHERE THAT IS!” Papyrus beamed and sped off in the direction of your house. Papyrus slowed down on Oak Street and glanced at you questioningly.

“R-right there.” You pointed out a small, dark brick house.

It had been another disappointment to your family, a small house in this quiet domestic neighborhood, but you had fallen in love with it the moment you laid your eyes on it. It was just the perfect size for you, and it was all yours. Everything was in your name, it was paid off, and in the world today what more could you want?

“Wowie! You Have A Very Nice House!” Papyrus beamed at you.

“Th-thank you Papyrus.” You blushed and glanced at the front door, “D-do you w-w-want…”

Papyrus reached over and  ruffled your hair in a move that reminded you heavily of Undyne. “You Are Very Tired Human, It Is Very Easy To See. I Would Very Much Like To Spend Some Time With My New Friend, But Perhaps When You Are Feeling More Up To It?”

You leaned over and hugged the skeleton tightly, “M-maybe this w-weekend? Sometime?”

“We Will Hang Out This Weekend, Then! And Make Friendship Spaghetti!” Papyrus declared.

You beamed at him as you got out of the red convertible and waved Papyrus off. You walked into your house and eyed your forgotten lunch tiredly. After a moment’s consideration you decided to deal with it in the morning and dropped your grocery bag on the counter next to it. You hesitated, unsure of whether to just to fall straight into bed or check on the bump on your head, but a vicious throb decided you.

You detoured to the freezer to grab a frozen bag of corn and went into the bathroom. You placed the corn on the side of the sink and leaned into the mirror, peering at the throbbing side of your head.

There was a definite bump. Curious, you poked it and immediately winced, that had not been the wisest decision. With a heavy sigh you gently applied the corn to your head and used your free hand to rummage around in the medicine cabinet for ibuprofen. It took a little bit of wrangling to get to child proof cap off with one hand, but in the end you proved to be smarter than the bottle. You shook two pills into your hand and abandoned the open bottle on the bathroom countertop to be dealt with later.

You set the corn and the pills on the kitchen counter so you could pour yourself a glass of juice from the fridge. You had considered swallowing the pills dry, but you had the feeling that the way the night was going, you might choke.

As you reapplied the corn to your head, you realized that your book bag had buzzed at you, and you retrieved your phone to find a number of missed messages from Sans.

_ Sans: was skulltures too much? _

_ Sans: i’m going to feel a little bad if i drove you off with bad skeleton jokes. _

_ Sans: even though you were giving as good as you got. _

_ Sans: are you okay? _

_ Sans: sorry? _

_ Sans: let me know if you’re okay? _

You swore silently and tilted your head so you didn’t have to hold the corn on your head and texted back.

_ You: I’m sorry Sans! I had a bit of an issue at the store and got distracted. I thought Skulltures was very clever. _

It was nice that he had been worried about you, you decided, collapsing onto your couch and letting the cold corn and ibuprofen tag team the ache in your head.

You were pretty sure you only blinked and suddenly the corn was warmer than it had been and a glance behind you at the oven told you it was 8:47.

You groaned and stood slowly, stretching. Your head felt a lot better and the impromptu nap did a decent number on the shaky feeling the adrenaline had left you with. You weren’t really hungry, and it was too late to eat, but you didn’t want the corn to go to waste so you dug around in your cupboards for your crockpot, deciding you could just make dinner for tomorrow and set it on low before you left for work.

As you bustled around the kitchen you set the kettle on to make a mug of tea to help you get back to sleep and stay that way. You checked your fridge and cupboard and decided on a corn and chicken chowder to take care of the corn.

A knock at the door startled you into nearly dropping your crockpot on your foot. Very slowly you set it on the counter and walked to the door. You peered through the peephole worriedly, then sighed in relief and opened the door.

“C-come in Sans.”

Sans hovered at the entrance for a moment, concern and confusion etched on his face. You were pretty sure he was there because of what had happened with Papyrus at the grocery store and anxiety gripped you at the thought that maybe he was here to say that maybe it was better that a person that was so obviously unstable should stay away from his brother and friends.

Sans walked in and glanced away from your face as you closed the door, adding fuel to the fire of your worst case scenario thoughts. What if the guy from the grocery store had followed you? What if he had waited until you were out of the picture and hurt Papyrus?

**Is Papyrus alright? Is everything okay?** You signed, knowing that you’d never manage to push a word through the anxiety clutching your stomach. Your hands shook as you signed.

Realization lit Sans’s white eyes up and he tentatively reached out to grasp your hands, “paps is fine. he told me what happened and said that you’d been hurt, i wanted to make sure you were okay.”

You felt your shoulders relax slightly.

“i wasn’t sure you’d want to see me after getting hurt defending papyrus.” He said slowly, testing your reaction.

He was worried  _ you  _ didn’t want to see  _ him? _

“I’m f-fine, of course I w-want to see you.” You assured Sans, who seemed in no hurry to release your hands.

Sans peered into your face, his brow wrinkling as he looked for answers to questions he wasn’t voicing, “i’m… confused.”

Gently you pulled one of your hands out of his and pulled him to the couch to sit, “That m-makes two of us I guess.”

Sans sat on the couch but twisted so he was facing you. You turned similarly and watched him, hoping for an explanation.

“i… you… you helped frisk with their homework. you reserved manga for alphys. you want to swap recipes with toriel. you  _ talked  _ with  _ undyne _ about sheet music? and you tackled a man to save my bro…”

You waited, but Sans just seemed more lost than before, “Yes…?”

“i was expecting...i thought it would take awhile for you to get used to us, to being friends with us. you are… you seem shy but you’re taking all of this very well.” Sans finished with a helpless shrug.

You tilted your head thoughtfully. Technically, Sans was right. It had taken you months to stop answering David with stuttered one word answers, or a nod or shake of your head. Emma had known you for over a year, and you felt flushed in horror at the memory of your pun spree. It was against everything in your character to have warmed up so quickly to everyone but… you didn’t mind. Talking with Undyne this morning hadn’t left you spent and in need of recovery. Helping Frisk had been fun, completely lacking the panic that usually accompanied you trying to help anyone with anything. There was no burning regret in the jokes you’d sent Sans, unlike the jokes you had allowed to escape at work.

“It feels like coming home.” You murmured, looking back to meet Sans’s gaze, “All of you… make me feel like I’ve been on a long and scary journey, and I’ve now come home.”

Sans stared at you.

Your cheeks flushed and you dropped your eyes to stare at your hands.

You were completely unprepared to Sans to lunge across the couch and wrap his arms around you, burying his face in your shoulder, only allowing you a glimpse of the brightest grin you’d ever seen on anyone’s face.

“S-sans?” You ask hesitantly, placing one hand on his back in a half hug.

“sorry, i… we all feel the same, like you’re a friend we’ve been missing. i was worried you wouldn’t take what i was patella’n you to heart last night.”

You lit up like a Christmas tree and wiggled your arm free to fully return the hug.

“thanks for saving pap.”

“He’s so sweet.” You sighed, “I c-can’t imagine s-someone hurting him, please don’t thank me. I j-just... it’s what any half decent person would d-do.”

“any half decent person wouldn’t have gotten hurt defending a monster, only a really sweet person like you.” Sans pointed out.

“I-if I could t-take every h-hit aimed at y-you guys I w-would.” You said fiercely, and Sans leaned back to look at you in surprise.

“Wh-when my neighbors first m-moved in I did s-some research on m-monster allergies so I could m-make them something as, ahm, a welcome gift.” Unconsciously you started shaking, remembering what you’d read, “Th-there was a l-lot of n-not n-nice stuff on the i-internet. I-i don’t know i-if th-things like HP are p-private, b-but there was i-information o-on h-how t-to d-damage a m-monster a-and h-how m-much HP i-it w-would t-take t-to k-kill a m-monster, t-t-t-t-t-” You bit your lip, “I-i c-couldn’t b-bear t-to s-see a-anyone t-turn t-to d-d-d-dust.”

Sans was watching you, not staring but searching your face like he was looking for answers in it again.

“why?” Sans breathed, “what made you this way? what changed you?”

“Changed m-me?”

“from other humans. not all humans are bad, but… i can’t imagine that kind of thinking being common.”

“D-don’t m-make it s-sound l-like that.” You pulled your hands back so you could hide your face, “L-like I’m a g-good person. I-it’s... I…”

Sans said your name and you prayed to whoever was listening that he couldn’t feel your heartbeat pick up.

“thank you for being our friend.”

“G-geez... w-wait until I-i actually d-do something.”

You peered over your hands and saw a wicked smile cross Sans faces, “you’re bad at accepting thanks aren’t you?”

“N-no.”

“thanks for saving papyrus.”

“Y-you already thanked me for that S-sans.”

“thank you for finding piano music for undyne.”

“Sans please…”

“thanks for saving nerdy anime books for alphys.”

“Sans…”

“thank you for helping frisk for their homework and for giving papyrus your phone number.”

You buried your face back in your hands, feeling like your face was on fire.

“thanks for telling bad skeleton jokes with me.”

You squeaked indignantly at him.

Sans gently pulled your hands away from your face and hugged you again, “thanks for opening the door and talking to me.”

“Y-you’re killing me, Sans.”

“i think you’re patella’n me a fibula.” He said solemnly.

You bit your lip for a moment and then wrapped your arms back around him, holding tightly to the solid feeling of Sans in your arms.

And on your stomach.

And in your lap.

Suddenly you realized you were in your front room, with your skeleton friend all but laying on you and cuddling you.

“I-i-i-i-” You tried to think of something to say, but your brain had shorted out. Sans snickered.

“it’s getting late, i should go home and read paps his bedtime story, and let you get to sleep.” He pulled back so you could see him face.

“S-sans? Thanks... for coming by… and talking...”

“you’ve got a nice voice.” Sans winked at you, “it was nice to talk.”

And suddenly he wasn’t there.

It was amazing how much the teleporting skeleton didn’t faze you as much as how red and hot your face was at this moment.

You grabbed a couch pillow and buried your face in it, letting out a muffled yell to relieve some of the emotions pent up inside you. Then you let out an impossibly long sigh and went to finish your abandoned chowder, and stick it in the fridge, ready to be put on to cook first thing tomorrow morning.

Despite all the positive feelings built up in you, you dreamed you were restrained while an angry grey eyed man showed you videos of Sans turning to dust again and again and again and again. You called for help, for Gaster, for anyone.

But no one came.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So you should expect the next chapter day after tomorrow, but you may get another quick chapter after that since I need to help my friend move this weekend. Let me know what you think? Thank you so much!  
> (What you expected me to end two chapters in a row on a happy note?)  
> (Emma and the Chair Pun incident is, incidentally, based on a real life occurrence. People really don't respond well to two hours straight of chair puns)  
> (Papyrus is my son, btw. I would literally fight genocide Frisk myself before i let them hurt Papyrus)


	3. My Universe Will Never Be the Same

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The royal guard gets a new job and you need to check your phone more often

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh my gosh you guys, you're really too nice I cannot begin to tell you all how much your words mean to me.  
> (Someday I may even respond to your comments if I ever get out from under my blanket.)

Tuesday followed a very similar pattern to Monday, except that Papyrus came into the library less than half an hour after it had opened and instantly zeroed in on you. At first you were a little worried that David would be upset that Papyrus was following you around as you finished up returns, but all he did was introduce himself to Papyrus and tell you it was nice to see you so animated.

At around eleven thirty Papyrus started to watch the door, and you raised an eyebrow as Undyne walked in and high fived the tall skeleton.

“I Am Terribly Sorry Human, But I Need To Take Sans His Lunch!” Papyrus hugged you tightly and ran out the door with a “Nyeheheheh!”

You raised your eyebrows at Undyne **Didn’t you have class around this time yesterday?**

“Frisk had an emergency Ambassador thing last night, and I talked to Toriel about rearranging my schedule when we got back. What’s this I hear about you getting in a scuffle with some terrorist, nerd?” Undyne crossed her arms and looked at you seriously.

**Papyrus told you?**

“As soon as we got back from Frisk’s meeting.” Undyne confirmed, “I would have come and found you so we could hunt the guy down and let him know what happens when he hurts one of my friends, but only Sans knows where you live.”

You frowned and grabbed a sticky note and scribbled your address down on it, “P-papyrus knows. He d-dropped me off l-last night, and n-now you know, t-too.”

Undyne took the sticky note, and for a moment deja vu swept over you and you half expected her to grin and say you weren’t as weird as she originally thought.

Instead Undyne swept you into a huge hug that lifted you off the floor before she dropped you back onto the ground, “Thanks Nerd!”

You beamed at her and grabbed a stack of five books someone had turned in before Papyrus left.

Undyne followed you through the library and you didn’t see the sly grin spread across her face, “So... you smooched the skeleton, huh?”

You dropped the books and spun, “I-We-He-it it w-was j-just a h-hug! Sans w-was j-just th-thanking me f-for helping P-papyrus!” You stuttered, blushing bright red.

Undyne grinned and scooped the dropped books up for you, “Fuhuhuhu,” She cackled, “Sans just said you two talked! I knew he was keeping something back when he started blushing!”

You stared at Undyne, mouth agape, **Did you just try to get me to confess to a kiss you didn’t know happened?**

Undyne nodded unashamedly and handed you the books, “Like I said, the bone nerd was acting suspicious! I figured _something_ had to have happened and you’re an easier nut to crack that he is.”

You slumped and tucked the first book in it’s spot, “M-mean.” You whined.

“You mean CUNNING! I am the master of finding out information!” Undyne declared proudly, “And you and I are going to start training! Nothing can happen to you again, and maybe next time you’ll be able to keep the guy from getting back up to hurt you.”

You worried your lip, “I-i’m not s-sure I w-want to train t-to fight.” You admitted.

“Then we’ll train you to DEFEND! Frisk is the same way, we’ll team up to teach you the frustrating act of DODGING!” Undyne declared as you put another book away.

You sighed and nodded, slipping the next three books, a trilogy, in their spots. **Dodging would probably help.** You signed.

“When’s your lunch anyway?” Undyne asked curiously, “I want to go through the fight step by step and we’ll decide what you did right and wrong.”

You glanced at the clock, but it was still half an hour before your lunch break. You signed your answer and lead Undyne over to the desk where there was a pile of books in need of repairs.

She drug a chair from one of the study tables over and started going over what had happened and how you could have avoided getting a rock to the head while you fixed books with torn pages, bent spines, and ripped covers.

Just before lunch you glanced at Undyne and the clock. A curious theory was slowly starting to emerge, but you didn’t voice it, instead just enjoying the lunch spent with your friend.

After Lunch, Undyne spent another hour talking to you about how she, Frisk, and Papyrus would work with you on your dodging abilities. At One o’clock Alphys nervously stepped into the library.

“Babe!” Undyne scooped Alphys up and kissed her soundly, “Glad to see you! Sorry I’ve got to split, nerd, but I have classes in half an hour.”

You were pretty sure you knew what was going on now.

 **Do you want the Mew Mew Kissy Cutie Manga? You can only check the six out by yourself, but I’d be more than happy to put the other four on my library card for you.** You signed innocently at Alphys.

“Y-yes please!” Alphys smiled tentatively and you returned her smile, leading her over and checking them out for her.

“Actually, d-do you know if, uhm, well, how many science books you have?” Alphys asked shyly.

Emma watched you curiously as you lead Alphys towards the science section. You couldn’t really blame her, today was the most vocal you’d ever been in front of her and the most you’d ever interacted with any patron, let alone three. There was just something about your friends that unlocked that lump in your throat and the choke hold your brain sometimes got on your mouth.

“O-oh!” Alphys eyes widened and she placed the Mew Mew Manga nearby and started darting around the shelves, “Oh there are so many I haven’t read! Th-this will m-make everything easier I think…” She murmured to herself.

 **I’ll be just behind that desk over there repairing books.** You pointed Alphys at your desk and she nodded, grabbing her manga and shifting them nearer to you,

Alphys didn’t talk as much as Undyne or Papyrus, but she asked you questions about things people generally assumed you had no idea about. Alphys never assumed you had no idea how black holes worked, or the what the cellular effects of absolute zero were. Alphys didn’t know that you hadn’t gone to college, she just asked you questions and seemed more than happy to discuss your answers in detail. You weren’t an expert by any means, but much like history you knew a lot about things that interested you.

Once you’d wanted to go to college. Gaster hadn’t quite understood, when you were a child, that advanced physics weren’t a normal topic for kids.

In the end it had been on more thing for your parents to get upset over, one more way you might draw unwanted attention to yourself.

You shook your morbid thoughts out of your head as Frisk came barreling into the library and hopped your desk to hug you tightly.

“O-oh? Is it 3:45 already?” You heard Alphys ask in surprise.

 **It is!** Frisk beamed as they signed Alphys, **I’ve got everything from here!**

 **You do, do you?** You arched a brow at Frisk and Alphys hissed meaningfully at them.

 **Can you tell us more about the revolutionary war?** Frisk pointed to his friends, **When the teachers explained it, it was really boring, but you kept telling really funny stories! History is full of funny things, I never thought it could be fun!**

“I’ve g-got to be heading out, Undyne will b-be home soon.” Alphys waved to you and gathered her manga and headed out.

 **I guess I can tell you little nerds a little bit more about history.** You signed back to Frisk with a smile.

“Dude! Sweet!” The little monster who had been introduced to you as MK hopped up and down excitedly.

You were a little bit confused, as Frisk’s presence alone seemed to poke a few holes in the theory that had started forming when Undyne was visiting you, but you were more than happy to spend your time repairing books telling stories from history.

At five thirty Toriel peeked into the library and beamed at you.

“My child! It is so nice to see you telling the little ones stories! My teachers told me that they had received some very interesting first drafts of the revolutionary war papers they had assigned, I see where the ideas came from.”

 **I just showed them where to look and told them some of my favorite stories,** You blushed.

“It is very sweet of you nonetheless.” Toriel beamed, “I was actually wondering if you had a few joke books, or cook books?”

 **Toriel, you don’t have to stay. I’m off in half an hour,** You blushed and looked up at her.

Toriel’s grin slipped into something slightly more mischievous, “I’m afraid I have no idea what you’re talking about child, I’m only looking for something that might fill the next twenty five minutes.”

Frisk shot you both a thumbs up and you couldn't help the laugh that bubbled out. You helped Toriel find a few joke books and a book of recipes you’d used yourself more than once.

True to her word, Toriel herded Frisk and the other kids out at five fifty five with a cheery wave to you.

You felt...glowly, was the only way you could think to describe it. You felt like your heart was shining with all the positive emotions bursting from your soul.

You hummed to yourself as you walked out, unable to think of any other way to express the burbling happiness inside.

“have a good day?” Sans asked from where he was leaning against the wall.

“M-maybe,” You smiled secretively, “Did you?”

“my day isn’t over, I thought i'd walk you home on my break.” He winked at you.

“Sh-should I be expecting P-papyrus to t-tuck me in t-tonight?” You teased.

Sans laughed and reached out to grab your hand and tug you in the direction of your house, “you, uh, noticed us then?”

“Everyone t-taking shifts you m-mean?” You raised an eyebrow and followed him. He didn’t drop your hand and you didn’t protest his hold.

“we got to talking last night after everyone got home. no one wants anything to happen to you.” Sans shrugged, “no big deal tibia honest.”

“You d-don’t have to d-do this…” You said softly, “I’m n-not exactly alone at w-work.”

“we don’t _have_ to do anything, we’re doing this cause we want to. you’ve wiggled your way into our hearts and now we want to keep you safe.” Sans told you honestly.

“I h-have to ask, wh-what help is the t-ten year old g-going to be?” You gave in to your curiousity.

“they’re twelve, actually, and you’d never guess it since frisk is such a pacifist but they can be a… vicious fighter. like they get possessed by some ancient semi-murderous demon.” Sans’s smile grew slightly tense, “must be undyne’s training, heh.”

You frowned, uncomfortable with how fake Sans’s smile looked now and ran a thumb over the back of his hand comfortingly. You guessed he was pretty upset at the idea of Frisk having to fight. To be fair, you were upset about people like Purity for Above forcing Frisk into a position where they would have to fight, as well

“S-so if I train with Undyne can I g-go to work by myself?” You teased, trying to lighten the mood.

“nah, we like spending time with you so we’d all end up at the library anyway, just more disorganized.” Sans bumped into you lightly.

“W-well I guess I’m okay with that. I l-like you guys too.” You blushed faintly.

“heh,” Sans chuckled, “i’m glad you’re not going to hurt anyone’s phalanges.”

“That was a stretch.” You told him immediately.

“cut me some slack, i come up with these on my bone.” Sans protested.

“I’m not going to,” You tightened your grasp for a second, “‘hand’ out laughs for puns.”

Sans shot you a smile so bright you were momentarily breathless.

It took you a few seconds of trying to restart your heart to realize Sans wasn’t walking anymore, and your hand stretched in the gap between you.

“this is your stop.”

You glanced at your house and for the first time felt a thread of disappointment at seeing your house, “Guess it is.”

Sans reluctantly let go of your hand, “i gotta get back to work…”

_‘So you smooched the skeleton?’_

“Sans?” He looked up at you and you quickly pressed a kiss to his forehead before you lost your nerve, “Th-thanks for coming.”

Sans face glowed blue as he watched you head inside.

Again a day went by without a sign of Gaster.

You had another nightmare, but you didn’t remember anything but the nebulous impression of people talking to you and the overwhelming feeling of being lost.

~

Wednesday passed almost identically to Tuesday, with the exception that as each of your friends got ‘off shift’ guarding you, you warned them that you didn’t work Thursday and would (mostly) be at home.

And, of course, not even the walk home with Sans filled with back and forth of the worst jokes you could think of could keep away your least favorite day of the week.

Thursday.

You didn’t want to think about it. It seemed so silly that a one hour session at ten in the morning could so thoroughly ruin your day, but it was the price you’d agreed to pay.

So, at nine o’clock, with still no hint of Gaster on the day you usually needed him most, you wandered listlessly out of your home and in the direction of your therapist's office.

Dr K wasn’t a bad therapist, you’d been seeing him since... honestly since you’d admitted Gaster existed, but when your parents had stopped…

being active in your life

they had had you sign a consent to disclose information for Dr K so they could ‘monitor you from afar’

Slowly your sessions had become less about fixing you, and more about making sure you were abiding by the terms of life your parents had set.

You didn’t blame Dr K, you were the one who was broken and your parents were paying him a lot of money to try to keep you semi-normal appearing on the off chance anyone managed to connect you to your family.

“Hey there doll, you here for your weekly?” Dr K’s secretary, Peggy, asked cheerfully looking up from what looked like a romance novel.

You signed yes and took a seat.

“Alrighty, I’ve got some paperwork here for you until the docs nine o’clock gets out,” Peggy brought you a clipboard, “Let me know if you have any questions hun.”

You flipped through the papers. Consent to release of information to your parents, regular legal papers about protected health information, basically the same things you always signed. You made sure to read everything closely on the off chance that anything had changed, but it was all pretty much procedure, so you signed it and brought the clipboard back to Peggy.

“Everything look good?”

You nod and Peggy stuck the papers in your file, “He’ll be with you in a bit doll.”

You flashed her a thumbs up she didn’t see because she was already reading again and took your seat.

Your phone buzzed a few times, and you pulled it out of your pocket.

_Undyne: It feels super weird to not have the library to look forward to today!_

_THE GREAT PAPYRUS: I TOO HAVE FOUND MY MORNING TO BE VERY QUIET. I AM THINKING I WILL NOT ENJOY THURSDAYS._

You stared at your phone thoughtfully, the thought of being wanted, of being missed, a foreign one to you, especially on today of all days.

_You: I don’t really enjoy Thursdays either, but you just have to have some days to get the things you don’t enjoy done._

You sent the message and then panicked when you realized how heavy that sounded.

_You: Like Laundry! And Dishes... haha_

That did not sound any less suspicious.

_THE GREAT PAPYRUS: I BELIEVE SANS TAKES A SIMILAR APPROACH TO CLEANING. EXCEPT INSTEAD OF ONE DAY A WEEK IT IS ONE DAY EVERY FEW YEARS NYEHEHEHE_

_Alphys: You’re still coming tomorrow night, right? (^=^)_

_You: Sure thing! If I bake cookies today is it alright if I bring some?_

_Undyne: I’D BE UPSET IF YOU DIDN’T!_

_Frisk: PLEASE BRING COOKIES. CHOCOLATE CHIP COOKIES. *WINK*_

You snorted softly to yourself and you got a text from Sans.

_Sans: so interestingly enough we have the same day off._

_Sans: so i was thinking_

“Hun?”

You looked up from the message Sans hadn’t finished just in time to see someone leaving.

“The doc will see you now.”

You nod to Peggy and pocket your phone, deciding that if what Sans wanted to ask you was urgent he’d blow your phone up like he had after the Store incident.

“Hey there Kiddo!” Dr K greeted you as you walked in and claimed your familiar chair.

 **Hello Doctor.** You sign distractedly, waiting for your pocket to buzz.

“Hey now, come on. We’ve talked about this. In the office we use our voices remember?” Dr K prompted.

“Sorry.” You whisper, clasping your hands together and placing them in your lap.

_“Hey nerd, it’s alright. You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to...If you run into someone who doesn’t understand just come find one of us and we’ll help!”_

‘You are an adult and you’ve been doing this for longer than monsters have even been on the surface.’ You remind yourself sternly when you immediately wished Undyne was here.

“You’re okay,” Dr K assured you, “Now how has your week been since we last spoke?”

You sat up eagerly, glad for once to have good news to share about your life.

“I m-made friends!”

Dr K looks up from his notepad, eyes wide, “Really? Is it someone you work with?”

“N-no! I stumbled into them on m-my way home from the store Sunday.” You beamed.

“Tell me about these new friends?” Dr K prompted.

You opened your mouth, and paused.

Floating over Dr K’s shoulder was a very familiar skeletal hand.

 **L I E** Gaster’s hand spelled slowly.

Your mouth closed and you frowned at the hand in confusion.

Gaster had seemed excited for you to meet Frisk, and he had never partially manifested before. You couldn't imagine why he wanted you to lie about your friends now.

**I F  Y O U  T R U S T  M E  L I E**

“You still with me kiddo?” Dr K prompted, “You said you stumbled into them on your way home?”

“Y-yes, s-sorry. I got l-lost in thought,” You told him slowly, “...S-sam, his name is S-sam and I m-met his… sister Diane as w-well.”

Gaster’s hand faded away.

“This is very good!” Dr K praised you, “And how does your imaginary friend feel about them?”

“I d-don’t know.” You glanced at your hands, a whirlwind of emotions ripping through you, “He d-disappeared on... on F-friday…”

“This is amazing progress for you to have made in a week!” Dr K was ecstatic, “Tell me all about them!”

You kept lying. You managed to condense Undyne, Papyrus, and Frisk into ‘Diane’ and Alphys, Toriel, and Sans into ‘Sam’. You didn’t mention your incident at the store, and changed your friends ‘guarding’ you into shared lunches and a few visits at the library. You changed tomorrow's anime sleepover into movie night at your place.

When you first started lying you felt sick, lying to Dr K was like lying to your parents. He was the only contact between you two, but as you spoke a tension you hadn’t even recognized lifted from your back.

This felt right, you didn’t want Dr K to know about your friends. You felt oddly defensive at the thought of him learning about them, even though Dr K had always been tolerant of monsters.

You wondered what Gaster knew that you didn’t.

You wished he would come back and tell you.

When the hour was up Dr K was positively glowing, “Kid, you’re doing great. I think we’re finally managing to move you past the trauma and strangeness from your childhood. I’ve got a little homework for you this week, I want you to choose one of your new friends and only communicate with them vocally, okay?”

You nodded slowly, “I c-can do that I th-think.”

“I know you can do it.” Dr K glanced at his clock, “Our time is up for this week, but we’ll see you same time next week, okay? Let Peggy know on your way out.”

“S-see you next w-week Dr K.” You murmur, standing up and drifting out of the room.

“I’ve already got you set up Hun, we’ll see you next Thursday.” Peggy didn’t even look at you as you walked out.

You hooked your thumbs in your pockets and walked home with your face pointed towards the sun.

Gaster had never hurt you. Gaster wanted you happy, that had been his goal since you were a small child. Gaster wanted you to befriend Frisk, but wanted you to lie to Dr K about your friends. Gaster didn’t trust Dr K.

You didn’t trust Dr K.

Your thoughts spun round and round in circles on the long walk home and you searched for the connection, the missing reason why Gaster had basically had you lie to your parents. For years he had always urged you to be open with Dr K, so what had happened? What was happening in your life?

Was Gaster ever going to explain?

Was he ever going to come back completely?*

"what were you thinking?!"

Your gaze instantly jerked to the livid skeleton standing by your front door.

All pretenses of smiles were gone. Sans was visibly upset, all but shaking as he took measured steps towards you. One of his eyes was flickering between white and blue.

"S-sans?" You asked hesitantly, realizing you had forgotten to check your phone after you left Dr K's office.

"you scared me to death! i know you're an adult, you don't have to check in with us when you go somewhere, but could you at least let me know you're alive when you leave the house three days after you piss a terrorist off?" He didn't seem to know whether to be pissed at you, or glad you were alright.

"I always l-leave the h-house on Thursdays..." You said slowly, not sure how to reassure him.

"kid... kid, you know that purity for above has killed ten human supporters for every monster they've killed?" Sans ran his hand over his forehead, "you... humans are delicate. you don't have magic to protect you like monsters do, if you got cornered by someone bigger than you, there'd be nothing you could do and we'd be left with no human... just a box..."

You were aware of the statistics. Purity for Above had risen through the ranks of normal hate groups to a terrorist organization by murdering two hundred people at a peace rally. There had been one hundred survivors on the humans side, and that was only because monsters had actively defended them. 

"Sans... I'm sorry I..." You bit your lip, "D-do you w-want to c-come inside? I'll explain and... and I'm sorry."

Sans just watched you for a moment before he sighed and pulled you into a hug, laying his face on your shoulder, "...sure..."

You awkwardly returned the hug, wishing again for the comforting guidance of Gaster.

Gently you led Sans into your house and he sat on one of the stools you had at your counter and watched you expectantly as you walked into the kitchen and faced him from across the countertop, needing that little bit of separation between you two.

"Th-thursdays... I..." You didn't want to explain all of this to Sans, how you were so broken your family couldn't accept that Gaster could be real, how they'd insisted on therapy, how they'd left you. You'd tried telling someone before and it would kill you to see the discomfort and pity on Sans's face.

"I go to th-therapy on Thursdays," You compromise with yourself, "It's... d-draining. I d-don't like thinking about it, or t-talking about it. It's s-so ingrained to avoid thinking about it until it h-happens that it d-didn't occur t-to me to say anything."

"you didn't respond to my texts." Sans said finally.

You pulled out your phone and flipped through Sans's texts.

_Sans: we could hang out today? we could do something at your place if you don't want to leave the house._

_Sans: kid?_

_Sans: you can tell me no, i won't be hurt._

_Sans: are you there?_

_Sans: kid?_

_Sans: i'm coming over, please be okay_

You bit your lip and pressed your phone to your chest, staring down at the counter.

"I'm n-not used t-to people caring." You admitted quietly, "I'm sorry Sans."

Sans reached across the counter and tilted your head up, "do you want to hang out today?"

You blinked back the emotions prickling at the corner of your eyes and nodded, "I'd like that."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *This is almost where you got cut off, I'm not going to lie, but I honestly disliked the second half of this chapter so much when I was writing it and then again when I was editing it, that I couldn't bring myself to leave it here. If this past here are a little... raw it's because I grabbed them from the beginning of next chapters unedited bits.  
> Gaster reappears! Kind of? What is your childhood friend up to?  
> Don't lie to your therapists kids, it doesn't help.  
> (The deal Reader has with Dr K and their parents is very similar to a deal my little bro had with his first therapist so I'm basing it on that.)  
> Notice inconsistencies? Good, they're there for a reason! Some things will become clear in...two more chapters I think? Other things will stay muddled for awhile longer.  
> In case anyone was curious, I have made Reader's house on Sims 4, just so I had something to look at while I wrote and I could upload it to the gallery if anyone was interested?


	4. I'm still fighting for peace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you so much for your support! It really means a lot!  
> (Please see the end note for some update stuff)  
> (Can you tell who reader decided to complete Dr K's homework with?)  
> (For those worried I'm not going to finish this, I just finished writing the last chapter in my notebook. Writing isn't the issue, I promise)  
> (If you'd like to get answers to questions, or just chat you can find my at sincidentsans.tumblr.com )

For awhile you just stood there, watching Sans watch you.

It was the strangest sensation, like deja vu but more intense and dizzying. Not just a moment of deja vu but an eternity.

“what were your plans for today?” Sans asked and the moment popped like a soap bubble allowing your mind to settle.

“I w-was going to b-bake.” You remembered, “Are you okay w-with that? Or d-do you want to d-do something else?”

“i’m fine sitting here,” Sans assured you.

“W-would you l-like a drink b-before I start?” You asked, barely remembering your manners. You couldn’t remember the last time someone had visited.

Actually, you weren’t sure anyone ever had.

“ah, well,” Sans smirked mischievously at you, “do you have any ketchup?”

You blushed. How did he know? Was this a joke?

“Th-that’s not f-funny Sans, I’m j-just a little forgetful l-lately.” You mumbled.

Sans looked at you with genuine confusion, “i... i’m not following kid.”

You blush darker and turned around and opened a cupboard.

A cupboard filled to the brim with ketchup.

“I’m n-not s-sure what has b-been up with m-me lately.” You admitted sheepishly, “Even when I write a l-list I keep b-buying ketchup. I d-don’t even use it that often…”

Sans seems just as lost as you usually were when you got home from the grocery store.

“well… i wasn’t teasing you. i drink ketchup.” Sans said slowly.

“Oh,” You blinked and pulled one of the bottles down, then glanced between it and Sans, “D-do you want a glass…?”

Sans snorted, “nah, i’m an animal. i’ll drink it straight from the bottle.”

You look down at the ketchup bottle, “Probably for the best,” You murmur to yourself, “I’d get jealous of the glass…”

“what was that?”

You wanted to die, “I s-said p-probably f-for the b-best, it m-might, uh, n-not c-come out of the g-glass!”

“oh... yeah,” Sans raises a brow bone at you, but you hand him the bottle and turn away from him so you can calm your blush and gathering everything you need for baking.

You put everything you need for cookies on the counter, and after a moment grab the few things you’re missing to make bread at well.

“how did the skeleton know it was raining?”

You feel yourself relax at familiar territory, “How?”

“he could feel it in his bones.”

You snort, “Wh-what happened to the skeleton who stayed t-to close to the fire?”

Sans grinned, “what?”

“He ended up b-bone dry!”

“I’m using that one on Grillby later.” Sans winked at you.

You fell into a comfortable back and forth of skeleton jokes as you absently followed a recipe you knew by heart.

“knock knock.”

“Who’s there?”

“Datsa Gonna.”

“Datsa gonna who?” You frowned thoughtfully.

“Datsa gonna make a lotta cookies.” Sans pointed to your mixer.

You followed his finger and paused. You had definitely doubled the wet ingredients. Very slowly you looked down to see you’d doubled the dry ingredients, too.

Your shoulders slumped and to your horror you felt tears prickling at the corner of your eyes as you realized what you'd done,, “I... actually d-didn’t mean t-to do this… there’s w-way t-too m-many in a n-normal batch, I’m s-so st-”

“hey!” Sans was suddenly right next to you, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder, “it’ll be fine! frisk loves cookies, and undyne and alphys snack like _monsters_ during anime. Tori’s probably like some, too.”

You nod slowly, taking a deep calming breath, and pushing passed the paniced feelings of failure, “I... that’s a g-good idea. I-i’ll set some aside f-for everyone as w-well as for the s-sleepover.” You smiled shyly at Sans, “S-sorry for… getting w-worked up over n-nothing.”

Sans’s expression is soft, “it happens to the best of us, right?”

You nod slowly and take another calming breath as you add the dry ingredients to the wet slowly, making sure it mixed well.

Reassured you were okay Sans walked over to the other side of the counter and resumed his seat, taking an absentminded pull from the ketchup bottle.

You tried not to think about that as you used a spatula to scrape flour off the edges of the mixing bowl, and once that was done you pulled the mixing bowl out of the mixer and placed it on the counter. You went back to another cupboard to retrieve saran wrap, turning your back to Sans and the cookie dough, and turned back around in time to see Sans pop a ball of cookie dough in his mouth, looking entirely unapologetic.

You shook your head with a smile and covered the cookies and stuck the bowl in the refrigerator.

“what are you _dough_ ing?” Sans asked curiously.

You smiled at the pun, “If you chill the d-dough, the c-cookies set up better, and while they chill I can preheat the oven and use it t-to help my bread dough rise.”

“you’re really _rising_ to the challenge to get baking done.” Sans wiggled his brow bone comically.

You gave in, “It’s the _yeast_ I can do on my day off.” You set about preparing the bread dough and setting the oven to preheat.

“your willingness to work makes you the person of the _flour_.” Sans reached across the counter and flicked some flour onto your counter space.

“I’m n-not really one to _loaf_ around.”

“i’m always _bready_ to take some downtime.”

You added more flour to the area Sans had sprinkled, pulled the dough out of the bowl and started kneading, “You _knead_ some b-better puns.”

“ _crust_ me some slack.”

You shook your head, “That one w-was no good.”

“it was a bit of a reach.” He admitted.

You paused in kneading to grab an oven mitt and tossed it at him, “Will you ad _mitt_ d-defeat?”

“if i don’t will you _throw a mitt_?”

You tried to frown, but a grin overwhelmed you, “I s-set you up for that one.”

Sans wiggled his stool meaningfully, “i’d _chair_ to say i’d have found one without the setup.”

“You’re in a _chair_ y mood.”

“maybe i’m just being _chair-_ itable with my puns.”

“That s-seems like a _chair_ -able way to spend your day off.”

“when i’ve got good company and bad puns, i couldn’t _chair_ less that it’s my day off.”

You smiled brightly at him, consumed by good humor, “W-would you w-want t-to do this again if I s-said pretty please with a _chair_ -y on t-top?”

“ _chair_ my day with an adorable punster? not something i’d be quick to say no to.”

You blushed happily and placed the kneaded bread dough back into its bowl, covered it with a damp hand towel, and placed it on the preheated oven. You washed your hands thoroughly and, with a quick glance at the clock you went to the fridge and pulled the cookie dough out, then retrieved a cookie sheet, parchment paper, and an ice-cream scoop, and started scooping cookies onto the cookie sheet.

Or tried to, Sans kept stealing balls of cookie dough.

“D-don’t you know that raw cookie dough is bad for you?” You giggled when he stole a third potential cookie.

“you’re right, it’ll go straight to my hips.” Sans winked at you and took a drink of the ketchup.

You paused, staring at the bottle thoughtfully, “Does... that... ketchup and cookie dough?”

“don’t knock it till you try it.” Sans advised.

You glanced between the ketchup and cookie dough thoughtfully for a moment, then went to your ketchup cupboard, grabbed a new bottle and opened it. Sans watched you with an expression bordering disbelief as you took a shot of ketchup, then plopped a bit of cookie dough in your mouth.

And promptly spat it in the sink.

“Nope.” You shook your head and began rinsing your mouth out, “Nope nope nope.”

Sans started snickering, “well, i guess no one will ever say you won’t try something once.”

“I’m n-never trusting you with f-food choices again.” You made a face and shuddered.

“that wasn’t really a choice as it was a _tasteless_ joke.”

You just shook your head and finished filling the cookie sheet, “I’ve l-learned my lesson, Sans.”

“at least you’ve realized you’ll never _ketchup_ to my pun prowess.” When you looked at him, he looked undeniably smug. You snorted, put the cookies in the oven, and set the timer.

“eleven minutes, huh? that’s an oddly specific amount of time.” Sans remarked.

“T-trial and error.” You turned back to him and hesitated.

Sans looked tired. Not like he was just a little sleepy, but genuinely exhausted to his core.

“W-want to watch a movie with me?” You asked before he could notice the concern in your stare.

“sure thing. anything particular in mind?” Sans hopped off the stool and looked at you patiently, hands tucked in his jacket pocket.

“Let’s b-browse Netflix and decide.” You offer.

Sans raised an eyebrow, “are you inviting me to netflix and chill?”

You froze and narrowed your eyes at him, “You c-can’t chill, the c-cold goes right through you.”

Sans blinked and snorted, then descended into full on laughter, “th-that was quick k-kid.”

_“Hey there Kiddo-”_

_“You still with me kiddo?”_

_“Kid, you’re doing great.”_

“Sans?” Your voice is softer than you intend it to be, “Can you n-not call me kid?”

Sans stops laughing slowly and looks at you with vague concern, “sure thing, i didn’t mean to upset you…”

You flush and shoot him a nervous smile, “I’m n-not upset, j-just... not a k-kid.”

“i gotcha.” Sans smiles again and you relax, “let’s work on that netflix and chill, huh?”

You roll your eyes, but lead him into the front room and turn on the TV.

Between you getting up every eleven minutes and Sans’s refusal to read you the summary of any of the movies without heavy commentary, it takes you about an hour to finally choose a movie, but you manage to compromise on a movie you’d enjoyed as a child after meeting Gaster called The Thief and the Cobbler. The main character, Tack, only spoke once the entire movie, and overall reminded you of Gaster. This caused the achy bit of your heart to hurt more at the reminder that he wasn’t really talking to you for reasons you didn’t understand, but it had been a comforting movie as a child and still managed to inspire enough nostalgia to cover your hurt.

By the time the movie was done, so were the cookies, so you settled on the couch to watch one more movie with Sans, urging him to take the lead in choosing since you’d made the final choice in The Thief and The Cobbler. You had just kneaded the bread dough again and it needed at least another half an hour before it would be ready to bake.

After much deliberation and even more commentary on summaries, Sans chose to watch Corpse Bride. Since you didn’t mind this movie in the slightest you gladly settled down to watch.

When half an hour passed you rose to put the bread in the oven, only to realize Sans had fallen asleep curled on your couch.

You stuck the bread in the oven, but didn’t set the alarm, instead noting the time you’d need to take it out.

You hesitated near the couch. Part of you wanted to grab one of the spare blankets from the foot of your bed and cover Sans, but the house was fairly warm from your baking and you were a little afraid that touching Sans at all would wake him up. Without realizing what you were doing, you found yourself peering over the back of the couch down at Sans’s face.

Totally relaxed, without the every present grin, or the ready to hand jokes, Sans looked…

Adorable.

You grinned wickedly to yourself and grabbed your phone off the counter, snapping a quick picture of Sans. While you had it in your hand you leaned against the counter for a little bit and read through the group chat, but while there was some back and forth between Frisk, Undyne, Alphys, and Papyrus there was nothing directed at you or Sans. You put your phone back on the counter and peaked at Sans again.

It seemed incredible that you’d only known Sans, Undyne, Frisk, Papyrus, Alphys, and Toriel for less than a week. It was so strange how quickly you’d accepted them and picked up on their quirks, like this was a place you’d been waiting to fall into forever. You felt like the puzzle piece that had been misplaced in the box, only to be found after the puzzle was complete to be placed nice and neat into your spot.

You wouldn’t give it up for anything.

You glanced at the clock and checked the bread with a sigh. It was just ready, and as you pulled it out of the oven Sans made a sound.

Frowning you carefully set the bread on top of the stove and walked over to glance down at Sans. He was frowning, his entire face screwed up into a general expression of misery.

“Sans?”

He didn’t wake up, but the frown grew deeper and his hands fisted around the front of his jacket.

Worried, you walked around the couch and gently sat right next to him, “Sans? W-wake up, Sans.”

Sans did not wake up, just whimpered softly and curled into a tight ball. Starting to panic slightly you reached out and touched his shoulder, “S-sans? Are you okay?”

You weren’t sure if it was a reaction to your touch, or to whatever dark road his dreams were wandering down but he started to shake and make small distressed sounds.

You hesitated, you’d never dealt with anyone having a nightmare, or night terror, and Gaster had always been the one to handle you after a nightmare. You were fairly certain that manipulating a radio to switch frantically through stations to approximate a lullaby was most people’s nightmare material as opposed to a comforting thing when you woke up, but…

Very Gently you pulled Sans into your lap and began to hum.

He stopped shaking, to your relief, but his face was still locked in an expression of abject misery and he hadn’t loosened his grip on his jacket at all.

You carefully reached over and paused the movie, considering your next action. Sans wasn’t waking up, but you didn’t want to leave him to go grab your phone and call for help on the off chance he got even more upset when you moved. The humming had helped a little bit, so maybe hearing a familiar voice would help even more?

“Y-you,” You tried to stop, but your voice seemed unnaturally raspy in the silence. Sans tensed in your lap for a brief moment and let out another unconscious whimper, and you strengthened your resolve.

“You are my Sunshine, my only Sunshine,” You sang softly, your voice evening out in relief as Sans relaxed minutely, “You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away.” Sans was slowly uncurling from his defensive ball, “The other night dear, while I lay sleeping, I dreamt I held you in my arms. When I awoke dear I was mistaken, so I hung my head and cried.” Sans was now curled into you, and the frown was fading from his face, “You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you, Please don’t take my sunshine away.” You hesitated, you knew the official lyrics to the next verse but they’d always struck you as slightly... off. You decided to stick with the lyrics Gaster had gone with when you were a child, “I’ll always love you, and want you happy. You do not have to fear the dark. I’ll be right there, dear, be right beside you, and I will love you all of my days.” Sans looked almost peaceful again, though if a skeleton’s breathing was anything like a humans you were fairly certain he was waking up, “You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know dear how much I love you, please don’t take my sunshine away.”

Sans opened his eyes, the white lights seemed slightly unfocused and said your name in a confused, upset way that hurt your heart.

“You okay?” You murmured softly.

“dreamed you were gone.” Sans said softly, closing his eyes and snuggling into you without seeming to realize it, “thought you died.”

You blinked down at him, not sure what to make of the sleepy skeleton, “I’m right here.” You assured him.

“kay... mind if i sleep a bit longer? ‘m tired…”

“G-go ahead Sans, I’m right here.” You assured him, half expecting him to return to his previous position on the couch, but instead he unfurled his hands from his jacket, wrapped his arms around your waist and fell back asleep in your lap.

You blinked down at him for a very long moment, then shrugged and carefully turned the movie back on, turning the volume just low enough for you to hear and settled in.

Three movies later, you were debating waking Sans up. It wasn’t that you were uncomfortable, but it was definitely getting late. Your phone was still in the kitchen, but if you were any judge of how far a vibration could cause a phone to travel, it was going to hit the floor very soon.

Papyrus was probably worried.

You sighed lightly and shook Sans’s shoulder, “Hey s-sleepy bones, you should p-probably wake up now.”

Sans blinked lethargically at you and slowly sat up. He sleepily took in the front room, then you.

“where’s… what did i miss?” He yawned.

“I’m not really sure, b-but my phone had b-been going off pretty nonstop. You should p-probably call Papyrus.” You advised gently.

“paps? he…” Realization dawned on Sans’s face, “you were making cookies. and bread.”

“Been done for awhile.” You agreed, though since you had left the bread in the still hot pans there was a chance it would be a little bit crunchier than you preferred.

There was a dark blue flush in Sans’s cheekbones, “how did i... did we end up…?”

“Cuddling?” You fought back a grin as the blue increased in intensity, “You fell asleep watching Corpse Bride, I... you started to have a n-nightmare, so I... uhm…” Now you were blushing, too. How exactly did you tell someone you panicked and sang them a lullaby? “I w-woke you up a b-bit. You s-seemed pretty tired though, s-so I let you g-go back to sleep.” And while you were a bit embarrassed, you did not regret it. Even now Sans looked a bit better, less ragged.

“oh... yeah, sorry.” Sans seemed to realize at once he was still in your lap and quickly sat up, “i, uh, get nightmares sometimes... didn’t expect it or i wouldn’t have... drifted off. i’ve got some skeletons in the closet heh.”

His heart obviously wasn’t in the joke, but you smiled at him anyway, “I’m, uhm, h-here. If you need me. Anytime.”

“thanks.” His blush was getting darker, “i better go, paps’ll be worried.”

“Oh wait!” You hopped up and ran into the kitchen, grabbing the tupperware you’d still not managed to return to Papyrus and filling it with cookies, “I’m n-not sure how sugar w-works with monsters, b-but it’s still probably b-better he not any just before b-bed but if you t-take some now you can b-both have some tomorrow.” You offered it to Sans hesitantly.

“thanks k… err,” Sans caught himself and then seemed flustered as he accepted the cookies.

“_____?” You offer, “It is m-my name. It w-won’t kill you to use it.”

“y-yeah... right.” Sans nodded, “i... i’ll see you tomorrow. with the others i mean. because we’re watching anime. with alphys and undyne. and papyrus. and frisk.” The more he spoke the bluer he got. “bye.”

“Good night Sans.”

He vanished, leaving the house feeling oddly empty. You hesitated, not really sure what to do with yourself, but finally you managed to get the cookies put away in four separate containers, the bread put away, and got into bed.

That night you dreamed of a party, of your friends, and of peace. Just before you woke up, though, you dreamed of Gaster, and blood, and regret.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There's some foreshadowing in this chapter that is a trap, take that however you will.  
> So this chapter did not exist in my original draft. This chapter was supposed to gloss over hanging out with Sans and move onto Friday and anime night with the crew  
> Until my cats created chaos and managed to delete and destroy that chapter and about three chapters after that.  
> Thankfully I have my original hand written bits for those chapters, but they went through a lot of revision to get them from their messiness to something readable, and I didn't want to miss posting a chapter, so I decided 'Hell, I'll write some fluff I'm totally unprepared for," And viola here we are.  
> That probably doesn't make a lot of sense, but I'm super slow in rewriting things I've already written so this was the most logical way to go on my end of things.  
> Also! A couple of you have noted that the titles are song lyrics! Yes, this is true, they're lyrics from the song I listened to while writing/editing each chapter where a particular line seemed to summarize things for me. And yes, I did say song. I listen to one song on repeat over and over while writing/editing certain chapter to keep the mood consistent.  
> I think that's everything for this chapter?  
> Oh! If you're interested in reader's house on Sims 4, it's on the Gallery. I think it'll come up by either searching 'Reader's House' or looking for the user 'ObviousLightning'  
> The Next Update should be right on schedule for Monday Night


	5. Take me out of this world

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> See the sickness Tag? This is where it comes into effect. If being sick triggers you, you can read until the line 'Around the first week in October' I'll be including summaries in the end notes so you can still stick with the story.  
> Gaster wasn't actually due to make a reappearance until, like, two or three more chapters but you've all been so wonderful (And The_Fallen_Human seemed to be especially worried) so enjoy a brief prelude by W. D. Dadster.  
> For random story facts, chapter songs, and a direct way to contact me feel free to come drop me a line at sincidentsans.tumblr.com

_Gaster watched you sleep._

_He had always been watching you, but for the first time in nearly two decades he watched you and you couldn’t see him, asleep or awake._

_It seemed like only yesterday that he had been drifting through the void, mourning that his children were lost to him, his youngest son completely unable to remember him and his oldest slowly driving themselves into a dark depression. He could stay focused in the Underground and watch his family without him, watch theworld knowing he was almost completely forgotten, or he could leave and try to forget in the void. It had only taken Sans breaking down over the machine he was trying to use to bring him back once, for Gaster to decide he did not want to watch the consequences of his actions any longer, and resigned himself to an eternity floating in the void._

_Then he had drifted into a tiny soul._

_Gaster was relieved you did not remember entering the void. He would never be able to forget the tiny child shivering, clutching their violet soul and desperately trying to hold it together in the blackness of eternity._

_Part of him had been apathetic, what was the death of one more human to him? He was everywhere and nowhere and he was forgotten… but you had seen him. Looked at him with bright eyes that reminded him painfully of his youngest son, of his Papyrus, and you had cried._

_It had been pure parental instinct to scoop you up, and gently shush your crying. It had been an eternity since he had held a child, but much like Sans you had latched onto him and took the comfort He wasn’t entirely sure how to offer._

_You were still dying. A monster like Gaster had magic, could hold their soul together in the void, but you were a human with no access to magic, and a child even worse._

_But you had Persevered so far._

_Gaster did not know what would happen to a human who had touched the void as heavily as you, but he couldn't bare to see you die, so he had gathered bits and pieces of the void and used them to glue the cracks in your soul together. He had been prepared to let you go, to let your soul find it’s way back to its home, but you had refused to let him go. Finally, instead of leaving you to find your way in the dark, Gaster had taken you back to where you belonged and, against his own best judgement, he had stayed with you, and taken you home._

_Gaster had not expected that you would still be able to see him when you awoke aboveground, out of the void, but you had. You had seen him and, just like in the void, you had reached for him. Once more, against his better judgement, he had stayed with you._

_And found himself, effectively, raising a child once more._

_You were a bright child. Your parents, neglectful before your accident and almost cruel after, did not understand you and decided you were broken. Gaster knew better, and did his best to teach you what they would not._

_Although, in hindsight, perhaps some of what he was trying to teach you was a bit advanced._

_Still, you picked up on sign language impossibly fast and it gave you a way to communicate when the void returned to you and locked your voice away._

_Not that you knew what was happening, only Gaster could see the blackness in your soul that grew and shrank depending on your mental state._

_The first time you had had a nightmare you almost sent your entire neighborhood into the void. It had taken a frantic attempt to approximate the lullabies that he sang to Papyrus through a broken radio to soothe your soul enough to save the city block._

_That was when your parents had insisted you start speaking with Dr K, and stay away from your older brother._

_Gaster had been annoyed, talking was the last thing you needed right now. What you needed was someone to teach you the magic that was now part of your soul, but his best attempts had only allowed you to access the void as a sort of storage space. You thought of the void as belonging to Gaster and, though that was entirely incorrect, Gaster continued to let you think of it that way as it gave you a way to control the void when it sought to sing through your veins and be used._

_Gaster would never hurt you, and therefore the void could not hurt you._

_It wasn’t the best control method, but without the traditional methods of teaching you magic it was all Gaster could give you to control the void._

_Gaster had raised you as best he could without being corporeal. As a child the physical affection you craved was often supplied by your older brother Ryan, but when he left for college you had had to make do with Gaster’s ‘shadow hugs’ where he enveloped you in his arms without touching you._

_Gaster had never hated anyone like he hated your parents. Having you was like having some degree of his children back. He saw Sans in you when you found fascinating history or science and sought more, and he saw Papyrus in the enthusiasm you displayed for everything you loved, and in the love you gave without restraint._

_You parents did not approve of their broken child and Gaster could do nothing but watch as your enthusiasm for things you loved faded away, as instead of finding new things to learn and love you just sat quietly and tried to be normal, and you locked away your loving heart._

_The void in you grew, and Gaster wondered how long it would be before it devoured you. What would you become as a creature of the void?_

_You had become ‘an adult’ to humans and your parents had left you. Done their ‘parental duty’ and set you up in a house and promised to provide for you if you swore to be ‘normal’. Then they erased themselves from your life._

_Much to his shame, Gaster knew he was essentially doing the same to you right now._

_The first time Gaster had seen Papyrus and Sans after the monsters had escaped the underground he had been ecstatic. Here were his children, grown and alive, and well… but you had spoiled him. They could still not see him, they could not hear him, and he was reminded painfully of why had had chosen to drift through the void in the first place._

_That, Gaster mused as he drifted over your sleeping form and watched you toss and turn from demons haunting your dreams, was when he had ruined your life the first time._

_~~~_

Anime night had been the best decision of your life. It had begun, surprisingly enough, at the library where Toriel and Frisk had picked you up and walked you home to retrieve your pajamas, blankets, and cookies. Toriel had turned off at her house, when you got to their row of houses, with the container you had made for her and promised she’d come spend Sunday baking with you.

Frisk had proceeded to turn what should have been a three minute walk from one yard to another into a fifteen minute strategy session.

Strategy for what? Turning Undyne and Alphys’s living room into an obstacle course slash pillow fortress of course. You were a little unsure, but honestly Frisk was a determined kid, and you fell easily to their ‘diabolical’ scheme.

It might have lasted longer if Undyne hadn’t popped her head out the door to yell for you to both get in the house before she picked you up and brought you in via force.

And Spears.

Undyne, Alphys, and Papyrus had been all for the Pillow Fort Obstacle Course, and with some ingenuity on Alphys’s part and overwhelming enthusiasm from Papyrus, you managed to construct a two story structure that should have been impossible.

Undyne had grabbed the cookies you’d brought, several bags of chips, and an assortment of other junkfood and hauled everyone up to the second floor of the pillow fort (Alphys was _really_ a genius underneath the unrepentant weeaboo.)

You had all waited eagerly for Sans to show up and get trapped in the obstacle course.

( **And then Undyne can kidnap Sans and be the mighty dragon guarding the Princess!** Frisk had signed.

“WHY IS SANS THE PRINCESS?” Papyrus had asked.

“Obviously so you dorks can save him, Papyrus, geez! Fuhuhuhu. Not to mention no one is going to save Alphys from me, she’s mine, and I am obviously the best dragon!”

“U-undyne!”)

The plan had partially succeeded. Sans had not gotten trapped in the obstacle course, instead he had opened the door, looked at you all, and walked away.

And walked into the second floor of the pillow fort.

Undyne had still ‘kidnapped’ him anyway, by kicking you, Frisk, and Papyrus out of the fort and to the beginning of the course.

It had actually been really fun dodging Undyne’s spears as you traversed the course and received encouragement from ‘Princess’ Sans who was snacking on chips and waving at you from the ‘window’.

At some point you were fairly certain Undyne and Alphys took advantage of the fact that Frisk couldn't really see them to kiss and snuggle.

Finally you had rescued Princess Sans.

And By rescued you mean that Papyrus and Frisk had attempted to hug Undyne into Submission and gotten suplexed.

You had sat next to him and signed **Dibs** when Undyne looked at you.

Undyne respected the rule of dibs.

Finally Alphys managed to get the anime going and you had all been absorbed into Mew Mew Kissy Cutie.

You and Sans took turns covering Papyrus and Frisk’s eyes when kissing happened.

At some point everyone fell asleep in the fort.

The next morning you woke up in a pile of monsters and pillows. Frisk and Papyrus were cuddled together on your left, Sans on your right, and Undyne and Alphys were literally lying on all of you like a skeleton human mattress.

It had been a little embarrassing to wake up to, but was apparently pretty normal for everyone else because the only reaction when everyone woke up was Undyne mourning the death of the fort.

She had then declared that after breakfast Saturday morning normal would commence.

Saturday morning normal was, apparently, Undyne ‘training’ Frisk. It looked less like the traditional training you thought of in regards to military training and more a test of agility as Undyne manifested the same spears from last night for Frisk to dodge.

Then you had been dragged into it.

The spears Undyne manifested were definitely a lot more intimidating when they were appearing all around you and not aimed at pillows.

Sans had had to leave almost the moment everyone woke up to go to work, but Papyrus stuck around for Frisk’s training since he and Undyne cooked on Saturday afternoons. When you got involved in the training he taught you about Blue attacks, and for the first time you saw your soul.

It was violet with thin cracks around the very edges that had seemingly been filled in with black.

‘A good soul.’ Undyne had said with approval, Frisk giving you a thumbs up.

You had finally managed to get home, and for a while your house had seemed lonely again, too quiet.

Then your phone blew up with messages.

Sunday had been spent with Toriel, and was just as fun.

She had come by to drop the container that you had put cookies in off, and ended up staying for awhile after you made a terrible pun.

Talking turned into cooking when she asked you about your cookie recipe and you realized it had been so long since you’d written it down you actually didn’t know how it went unless you were making it. Very much like your time baking with Sans it had been filled with bad jokes and puns, but it was slightly different in that Toriel was…

Well, motherly.

You and your mother hadn’t cooked together, cooking hadn’t been one of her preferred activities, but you imagined that cooking with Toriel was like cooking with the best mom.

Toriel left and Sunday turned to Monday, with your ‘guard’ trading off shifts just like they had the previous week. Monday turned to Tuesday, which turned to Wednesday, which turned to Thursday and when you came home from Dr K’s appointment, Sans was waiting on your front porch for you. Friday was anime day and Saturday you spent even more time with Undyne and Frisk dodging spears, practice made perfect and you were able to handle them in higher volumes. Sunday brought Toriel and Frisk and Cinnamon Butterscotch pie and three near ‘Mom’ slip-ups.

Even as time passed your days did not vary that much…

Except for one thing.

Shopping with Papyrus was very random. He did not have a set day to go shopping, and when you requested that you go with them there were days when you went shopping every night after work.

Of course, you were no more subtle than the rest of your friends.

“Human,” Papyrus caught your attention as you considered two different brands of chocolate chips.

You looked at him and raised an eyebrow. Just beyond Papyrus an older lady caught your attention, she was watching you with an odd look and you narrowed your eyes warningly at her. She moved on the the next aisle quickly.

“Human,” Papyrus said again, trying to keep your attention, “You Do Not Need To Protect Me.”

You looked up at him in surprise.

“I Realized Very Quickly That, Other Than Wanting To Spend More Time With The Great Papyrus, One Of Your Goals Was To Protect Me From Other Humans That May Be Considered A Threat.” Papyrus said seriously. You gently set the chocolate chips down and gave him your full attention, “I Can Promise You Human, I Am Fully Capable Of Protecting Myself And In No Danger.”

You considered him very seriously.

 **I know you can protect yourself, but I really do like spending time shopping with you and…** You hesitated, trying to think of how best to put your thoughts, **Do you think I’m going to be attacked at work?**

Papyrus looked a little confused by the conversation shift, “The Chances Of Anyone Attacking You At Your Place Of Work Are, Admittedly, Small; However There Is Still A Chance And We Don’t Want To Risk Your Safety.”

 **It makes you feel better to know I’m safe.** You nodded with a smile.

Papyrus slowly nodded, “It Makes You Feel Better To Know The Great Papyrus Is Safe?”

 **My friends are so strong and great,** You signed to him with a big smile, **I know they can defend themselves, but I worry anyway.**

“You Would Make A Good Sibling, Human!” Papyrus declared, “You Sound Just Like Sans!”

You were taken a little aback.

 **I am a sibling… I have an older brother.** You signed slowly

“Wowee!” Papyrus said excitedly, “Will We Get To Meet Your Brother?!”

 **Ryan is… He…** Probably didn’t want to deal with your brokenness? Wasn’t allowed near you? Probably didn’t even remember what you looked like?

None of that was fair to Ryan, he had been the most supportive member of your family growing up. He had put a lot of effort to learn some sign language to make you more comfortable and had always made time for you… but when he went to college he hadn’t come home a lot, and had always seemed so stressed when he had…

You had turned eighteen when he had been working on his Master’s degree, and you weren’t even sure he had been aware when your parents moved you out of town and into your own house.

 **Ryan is very busy and lives far away.** You finally signed, **He doesn’t have time to see me.**

Papyrus frowned, “That Is… Very Sad. I Would Be Most Upset To Not See Sans For Long Stretches Of Time.”

 **It is something that happens with humans sometimes.** You signed sadly.

“Then I, The Great Papyrus, Will Be Your Brother So That You Do Not Have To Miss Your Ryan So Much.” Papyrus decided, “I Am Sure Frisk Would Be Your Sibling As Well!”

You looked away to hide the tears sparkling in your eyes, **Thank you Papyrus… I’d like that.**

Papyrus picked you up and hugged you tightly. You loved Papyrus, honestly.

September ended, October began, and like the leaves on the trees your world was filled with color. You watched your friends decorate their houses and for the first time you decorated your little house, too.

Around the end of the first week in October you picked up a cough, but other than the occasional chills or shortness of breath you didn’t really get sick with it so you dismissed it.

The second week of October and coughing, Toriel had been a bit concerned, but you had been calm about it and had no signs of anything bad so she just settled for being even more motherly, which inched you closer and closer to accidentally calling her ‘Mom’. You had be be very careful in what you signed to Toriel, because you had decided you would have to hide under your bed for the rest of forever if you actually slipped up. Papyrus had not so subtly been leaving honey everywhere, which you blamed on the herbal remedies book Emma had pointed him to when he asked about humans being sick.

The Third week of October you were, admittedly, feeling a tiny bit more drained. A tiny bit.

Okay, you were pretty exhausted. You just didn’t want to go to the doctor. You made a promise to yourself, if you were still feeling this way on Halloween you would go straight to the doctors and even call in sick to work to get better.

Honestly, other than being sick your life was great!

Well, except for One thing.

Or two really.

Maybe technically three.

Gaster still hadn’t shown back up. After the briefest appearance in Dr K’s office you hadn’t seen him again. That was a big downer.

The nightmares hadn’t gone away either, in fact they were getting worse. At this point you didn’t even remember them when you woke up, which you usually did around three or four hours after you went to sleep. That probably wasn’t helping with being sick either.

And, finally, Sans was acting weird.

He still spent time with you on Thursdays, and walked you home on days Papyrus didn’t go shopping, or Fridays when you walked with Toriel, but he seemed distant…

He flinched if you reached out to touch him.

Papyrus had said it was probably because his jobs were tiring him out when you asked if he’d noticed anything off.

You didn’t ask if Sans flinched when Papyrus tried to touch him.

The Wednesday before Halloween you woke up feeling awful, exhausted, and in a general terrible mood.

Due to an Ambassadorial thing that required the presence of the entire staff, part and full time, Frisk, Undyne, Alphys, Toriel, and Papyrus were all needed at the embassy all of today and Sans had to his four jobs, meaning you would be more or less all on your own today.

For a few hours you just sat in bed and contemplated your phone. Finally with a groan you rose and got yourself ready for the day. The walk in clinic was only a few blocks away from the library and didn’t close until seven so you could head straight there after work. You set a reminder in your phone to call Dr K’s office and cancel tomorrow's appointment because there was no way you’d be able to convince yourself to walk to his office and deal with the general awful feeling that followed your visit. You had done this once before in previous years and knew that as long as you showed up next Thursday there would be no issue.

With Thursday free you could call in sick on Friday and hopefully recover enough to enjoy Halloween with everyone.

Plans made, you grabbed a face mask to keep from getting anyone else sick (like you had been doing since the first week), set your lunch and book bag in Gaster’s Other Space to make it slightly easier to walk, and set out to work.

A few hours later you had never regretted being at work more. You had taken a break around nine to call in to Dr K’s office and even that miniscule amount of effort seemed to drain you more than necessary.

David had taken to checking in on you every few minutes, and even Emma was leaving the front desk often to make sure you were still standing.

It wasn’t hard to find you, to be fair, your coughing was getting worse and worse.

“Hey,” You glanced up from the bookshelf you had been leaning on to see David watching you with concern, “You’re not doing good.”

“S-sorry B-bossman,” You offered throatily, the more you coughed the more exhausted you felt, “W-wasn’t th-this b-bad th-this m-morning.”

“Head over to the clinic buddy,” David told you, “Take the rest of the day off, and Friday. We’ll see you Monday if you’re feeling better. I’ll call Sora in if we get overwhelmed, alright?”

“Th-thanks David.” Another coughing fit wracked your body.

David bit his lip, “Actually… Do you want me to drive you? Emma should be fine for a few minutes.”

You shook your head negative, “N-no, really. F-fresh Air w-will b-be good for me.”

David did not look convinced, “At least call one of your friends, I’m actually surprised they aren’t here…”

“At th-the embassy.” You shook your head, “Important s-stuff.”

“All of them are working at the embassy?” David prodded.

“Ye-well… S-sans isn’t w-working at th-the embassy b-but he’s s-still working. I’ll b-be f-fine, David.” You assured him.

David sighed but nodded and let you slowly walk out of the library after signing out. He hesitated, then went to his office and retrieved a scrap of paper he’d been slipped a few weeks ago by a short skeleton, and pulled out his phone.

You made a point to walk as straight and carefully as you could until you were well out of sight of the library, then leaned against the wall of a building and started coughing. It was the worst fit yet and you ended up on your knees gasping for air afterwards. It was awful and you couldn’t imagine how you had gone downhill so fast. Very slowly you struggled back to your feet and reached into the Other Space to retrieve your book bag with your ID and other important information in it. The moment the small window into the Other Space closed you felt sapped and dropped back to your knees, struggling to breathe.

“shit.”

Sans.

You wanted to look up at him, to say something, to assure him that you were fine and please don’t look at you when you were feeling like this, but you couldn’t speak past the sudden inability to breath and the heat you felt rising in your face.

Or maybe your entire body.

Or possibly it was the entire world that was getting hot.

“shit sweetheart don’t do this.”

Were you the one making the world spin? Or maybe you were the one responsible for the darkness that was slowly creeping in.

“hold on, please hold on.”

Hold on to what? Sans? If he’d let you touch him you’d hold onto him. You never wanted to let him go.

“please please please…”

“S-sans,” You breathed, trying not to give into delirious giggles, or the encroaching darkness, “S-s-saaaaaaaaannnnss… it’s s-so warm…”

“baby doll it’s freezing out. grab onto me, please, we need to get you to a hospital.”

Your head swam viciously again and your vision wavered. You could just barely see Sans through the miles of darkness and paradox space separating you. He looked so worried and your heart twinged. You hated worrying Sans.

“Saannss… it’s okay... I think… I’ve j-just got… a _femur…_ ”

Sans’s half laugh half sob was the last thing you heard as the darkness won.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Summary: Toriel is concerned, Papyrus tries to help with honey, you stay semi sick. Not enough to be worried about though, you swear. Except you're still having nightmares, Gaster still hasn't showed up, and Sans won't let you touch him without flinching anymore. Wednesday before Halloween you feel worse than ever. You use the Other Space to take some of the strain off of carrying things to and from work, but that;s getting pretty draining, too. When you get to work you don't last half the day before David tell you to go to the doctor. Unfortunately all your friends are important and occasionally have to actually be at the Monster Human embassy, except for Sans who is working four jobs so how could you bring yourself to bother him? You head to the walk in clinic and David, worried, calls Sans. You make it a little distance away before reaching into the Other space, exhausting you worse. Sans shows up, you make a terrible pun, and then the lights fade to black.  
> (Hope you guys enjoy, we'll start seeing Plot in the next chapter. Hopefully. Probably. See you Wednesday!)


	6. I don't want to miss you tonight

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You've been pretty sick  
> But things seem to be getting better

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey-yo  
> Guys, it's the chapter before Plot Happens, but no less important cause it's important for feels reasons!  
> Plot happens next Chapter, and then we have a Fluff Chapter coming Sunday as a Valentines gift  
> This chapter has Hospital stuff and mentions of sick stuff, so if that's a trigger for you I've got a summary in the bottom note, you'll want to check up on that after you read the line 'You woke up'.  
> Remember for info on Chapter titles, random bits, and if you've got questions you can hit me up at sincidentsans.tumblr.com  
> Thank you so much for your continued support! It means the world to me!

You drifted in and out of fevered dreams, unable to tell the difference between what was happening, what you were dreaming, and what you were remembering.

 

 **_Love you little sib,_ ** _Ryan signed slowly, concentration evident on his face._

 

_“I’m sorry baby, can you imagine how the press would react to you? We’re doing this just as much for you as we are for us.” Your mother stroked your hair, her eyes like storm clouds._

 

_“love please wake up.” Sans begged raggedly._

 

_“are you ready for your big debut?” A different Sans asked you._

_“As long as you’re there.” A different you replied._

 

_A man hefted a rock at Papyrus, but his furious eyes were locked on you, “You’re a traitor to humanity.” He spat but then he dropped the rock and turned to someone you couldn't see with a pleading expression, “Do we have to kill them?”_

 

_“There is no one to contact for them, no parents, no siblings, nothing.” An unknown voice spoke over you._

_“What about the skeleton that brought them in?”_

_“It’s a monster. It wouldn't be appropriate.”_

 

_“Oh my child, I don’t mind if you call me ‘Mom’,” You could almost feel Toriel’s arms around you, “We are your family now.”_

 

_“This is what happens to traitors who lie with monsters.” A heavily distorted voice announced. Your wrists felt raw from the rope, but you still fought to sign one final message to the camera you were sure was watching._

 

_“Chara?” Frisk looked at you, but they weren’t really Frisk, “If you could make one wish, what would it be?”_

_“For Frisk and Azzy to be happy.” Chara Not-Frisk responded instantly._

_“Not you?”_

_“What do I care if I’m happy? They’re the ones I care about.”_

_“Do you regret dying?”_

_“How can I? I never would have met Frisk if I’d lived.”_

 

_The world was dark and awful and full of betrayal. All that existed was Pain and Sans. Or the thought or Sans._

_“Did you ever love me?”_

_“Before you were a failure, I did.”_

 

_You watched the bomb fly through the air and your heart stopped as you saw it was aimed right where Sans was leading Frisk, both of them laughing at a joke and unable to see the danger._

 

_Your shoulder ached constantly._

 

**_Come child, I will protect you in The Void._ **

 

You woke up.

There was no fanfare, no slow draw to consciousness. One moment you were lost in your _memories/dreams/future/past_ the next the sound of your heart being monitored was in your left ear.

“Oh good, you’re awake.”

You rolled your head to the left with what had to be more effort than it should have been. A nurse was in the last stages of switching out your IV fluid and as you turned to her, she beamed at you, “If you're awake you're out of the danger zone.”

“Day?” You rasped.

"What's the last day you remember?"

You close your eyes for a moment and swallow. You remembered waking up, and going to work... you remember being sick and you almost remember leaving, but so much is a blur, "W-wednesday?"

“It’s Saturday, you had a pretty bad case of pneumonia. Seems like it had been building up for the last month,” The nurse told you softly.

Saturday? It can’t be Saturday!

“Your friend, the one who admitted you, has been here constantly. He’s been very worried about you.” She took something from the bedside table, “Here, sip slowly. I’ve been keeping it on hand just in case.”

She put a straw to your mouth and you suddenly felt like you’d never been so thirsty in your life, but you obeyed her instructions and drank slowly.

“Better?”

“Y-yes thanks.” You shivered and the Nurse pulled a blanket up from the bottom of bed.

“M-my friend?” You asked, trying to remember how you could have gotten here.

“Yes, his name is Sans I believe? He came in with you Wednesday and admitted you unconscious,” The nurse looked slightly worried, “We managed to pull your medical files, but no matter where we looked we couldn't seem to find any family listed anywhere.”

You dropped your eyes to the blanket. They’d removed themselves from everything? That they could do it, you weren’t surprised. That they removed themselves? Yeah, that was a bit of a surprise.

“I don’t… there isn’t…” You bit your lip and refused to look up.

“Do you have an emergency contact? We’ve been using your friend Mr. Sans, but he can’t make any legal decisions on your behalf if you fall unconscious…” The nurse was speaking softly, like you were something that could shatter at any moment.

“Uhm… I… no, but i-if you c-could bring me the p-paperwork I’ll f-fill it out.” You said softly.

“Okay dear, just one last thing,” The nurse said softly, “Do you have anyone you’d want on your visitor list? Or excluded? We’ve had… well, a few monsters camped out in our waiting room over the past few days.”

You looked up at her in surprise.

“It’s against hospital policy to let anyone in without your approval, with the exception of Mr. Sans who was the only contact we had for you.” She said gently.

“A-all of them.” You felt awful, “L-let them in I m-mean! D-don’t t-turn th-them away, they’re m-my f-family.”

The nurse looked infinitely relieved, “Of course. If you need anything press the call button, my name is Nurse Stephanie.”

“Th-thank you.” You felt exhausted again all of a sudden, but you were terrified to fall back asleep. Saturday? How could you have been unconscious since Wednesday?

“Of course. Visiting hours begin in a few minutes, so I’m sure you’ll be swamped any moment.” Stephanie gave you a bright smile, “I’ll be back with your paperwork in a second.”

You nodded and didn’t look up until she’d left.

Well, it was one thing for your parents to tell you that, other than reports from your therapist, they didn’t want anything to do with you. Quite another to find out they’d used their ‘friends in high places’ to literally have themselves wiped from your life.

You weren’t sure what was worse, the news about your parents or the thought that poor Sans, who could barely stand too close to you for weeks, had been forced to admit you to the hospital and be your only contact for three days.

Stephanie returned a moment later with a clipboard full of papers and a pen. “Someone should be by in a little while. Don’t hesitate to call if there’s anything you need.” She told you gently and then she was gone again.

For a moment you just stared at all the papers, and then with a sigh you got to work. You stared at the box of the bottom of the first page titled emergency contact for a long moment, then pulled the paper off the clipboard and set it to the side for the moment. You were more than slightly surprised to see the next page was a ‘Do Not Resuscitate’ form. Were those common things to give people to fill out without them requesting it?

Were you going to fill it out?

Before you could consider further your door opened with a bang, revealing a wide eyed panting Sans.

“you’re awake.”

You’d never heard him sound so relieved and terrified at the same time. He bolted towards you and pulled you to the edge of the bed, all but holding you as he crushed you to him.

“you’re awake. holy shit you’re awake, oh my god.” He breathed.

This was a surprising amount of contact for someone who’d been acting like you were covered with venomous spikes for almost a month.

You were so caught off guard by Sans that you didn’t see the next person come in until Frisk had clambered onto the hospital bed and glued themself to your side, clutching you almost as frantically as Sans.

“Oh my child,” You looked up from Frisk to see Toriel rush into the room with tears in her eyes, “Oh my child I’m so glad you’re alright.” She looked dearly like she wanted to take Sans’s place in holding you, but settled for wrapping your hands in her paws.

“Don’t you _ever_ do that again _____!” Undyne demanded, “Ever!” Alphys and Papyrus were hot on her tail and the door fell shut behind them.

“W-we were so worried!” Alphys said in a tone more firm than you’d ever heard the little dinosaur use.

Papyrus watched you timidly from the end of the bed, looking so worried your heart ached.

“The Hospital Humans Would Not Tell Us Anything Because They Said We Are Not Your Family.” He said unhappily, “Are You Well?”

You looked up at Sans in confusion, if he’d been visiting you then surely they would have let him know…?

“they let me visit, but wouldn't tell me what was wrong.” Sans said roughly, his grip on you tightening, “i... i just had to sit there while you were unconscious and... not know what was wrong or why… all i could do was listen to the beeping…”

“The hospital staff said they couldn't contact your family to get clearance for us to see you, or know how you were.” Alphys murmured.

“Yeah! What’s with that nerd? Even your boss couldn't find any way to contact your parents!” Undyne scowled.

You felt yourself freeze. You couldn't tell them that you were broken, unwanted. If they knew how easily your parents had tossed you aside they wouldn't even want to see you, let alone be your friends…

Except…

Except they were here now. They’d been terrified for you since Wednesday. Didn’t they deserve at least some of the truth?

“My child, you do not have to…” Toriel trailed off as you drew your hands from her paws and began to sign.

 **My parents are... important. Politicians, wealthy, they own several science labs across the country known for the breakthroughs they’ve made…** You signed slowly, trying to get your thoughts together, **When I was five or six they took me to one of the Science Labs they owned… I don’t remember what happened, but there was an accident and I nearly died.** Toriel was shifting, looking even more like she wanted to snatch you from Sans’s arms, **When I woke up I was… different. Broken. I stopped talking, and I learned sign language but I was… it was embarrassing for my parents. When my brother, Ryan, started learning sign language for me and spending more time with me than on his studies it was too much for them. He was so smart, he was their pride and joy, and I was going to ruin his life. I didn’t see that, he was just my brother and I adored him but… he was six years older than me, and they encouraged him to graduate early so he could go to college early, then they discouraged him from visiting home too often… The moment I turned eighteen they bought me a house in a different town, put everything in my name, and left… I haven’t had direct contact with them since, and I don’t think Ryan even knows where I am… It’s not normal to erase yourself from your child’s life so completely, but they had the connections to do it and I’m just... just an embarrassment.**

Silence reigned. You clasped your hands and stared down at them, wishing they’d just leave and stop drawing this out.

“Fuck ‘em.” You looked up sharply at Undyne, whose scowl was more fierce than you’d ever seen it, “If they can’t see how great you are, they don’t deserve you.”

“Undyne…?” Her name slipped out past the knot in your throat.

“You are not broken my child,” Toriel told you firmly, “You are a beautiful, wonderful, bright child that any parent would be glad to have. Your parents were blind to have missed out on such a joy.

“Mom, I-” It slipped out before you could stop it and you felt yourself turn red.

Toriel took you from Sans, “Oh child, it seems so strange but from the moment I first saw you I felt you were mine. If you would like to call me ‘Mom’ I would like nothing more than to be your mother.” Toriel assured you.

A poke to your side brought your attention back to Frisk, who was watching you hopefully.

**Big Sib?**

You let out a shaky laugh, **Little sib.** You signed back.

“My children,” Toriel leaned over to include Frisk in the hug.

“Human,” You looked to papyrus, barely aware of the tears streaming down your cheeks, “I Have Already Told You That I, The Great Papyrus, Would Be Your Little Brother, That Has Not Changed.”

“W-we’re your family.” Alphys assured you.

You felt Sans intertwine his phalanges with your fingers, “you’re ours.” He told you firmly.

Toriel gently settled you back down, Frisk still snuggled into your side, but all the movement knocked the clipboard to the ground. Papyrus retrieved it and before you could stop him read it.

“Dr. Alphys, ‘What Does Do Not Resuscitate’ Mean?” Papyrus asked.

Alphys looked at you in shock.

“It... it m-means that if s-something bad happens and our friend dies... they do not want to be brought back.” Alphys said slowly.

Papyrus dropped the clipboard on the bed like it had bit him.

Undyne picked the clipboard up and the pulled the paper out, “It’s not signed.” She said slowly.

You nodded, your heart in your throat.

“Well, Nerd, obviously you don’t need this one. I’ll just throw it in the trash.” Undyne said with a fake laugh.

Despite saying she was going to throw it in the trash she didn’t move, just looking at you with a fake smile, pleading in her eyes. Slowly you glanced around to see everyone was watching you quietly, worry in their eyes.

Except Sans.

Sans looked like someone had punched him, hard.

“W-wait Undyne.” You said quietly, there was a tensing around you and that quiet moan of pain was definitely coming from Sans, “If y-you throw it away th-they’ll think I didn’t get it. I j-just n-need to leave it unsigned.”

You were definitely not expecting the crushing hug from the fish woman, or from Frisk who was doing their very best to meld into you.

“D-don’t scare me like that!” Undyne sniffed, “Geez!”

“Sorry,” You said shyly and Toriel leaned over you and took the first paper you’d set aside.

“Mo-Toriel?” You asked in surprise.

She wrote something quickly and handed it back to you, “My child, I already told you it was quite alright if you called me mom… I hope I am not being presumptuous?”

You looked down to see that Toriel had filled in the information for Emergency Contact with her name, number, and address. Under the relation line she’d written ‘Mother’.

You brought your hand up and bit your fist to keep away the tears.

“N-no, not at all I…” Your throat caught and to your horror you started coughing. There was a little bit of panic until you managed to stop it and assure everyone you were alright.

Everyone seemed to be in a rush to assure you they wanted you as they talked about what they planned to do when you were out of the hospital, filling you with a warm glow.

“Hello?” A woman peaked her head in, “Hi, sorry, my name is Doctor Gloria, I’ve been in charge of your friend while she’s been here.”

“hey doc,” Sans said quietly.

“Mr. Sans,” She nodded, “I hate to interrupt, but there are a few things I need to speak with my patient about…”

“N-no,” You shook your head, “They d-don’t have to leave... if they don’t w-want,” You looked around at them, “They’re m-my family.”

Dr. Gloria seemed uncertain for a moment, but nodded and looked down at the clipboard she was carrying, “Very well. You had a very persistent strain of Pneumonia, most people your age in good health should have been able to overcome it within one to three weeks, but, as near as we can tell, your immune system was weakened by fatigue. From what Mr. Sans has told me you shouldn't have degenerated so quickly on Wednesday, but you went from ‘ill’ to ‘critical’ over the course of a few hours.” She turned a page and you felt Sans tightening his grip on your hand again, “You’re out of the woods for the most part now that you’re awake. I’ll want to keep you in for observation for a few more days but then I’ll send you home with some medicine, and as long as you get some rest you’ll be good.” She flipped the page back and met your eyes seriously, “I do mean get some rest, though. You’re okay now but if you relapse your immune system won’t be able to take it. You Will Die.”

Undyne grabbed your shoulder and Frisk buried themself deeper into your side.

“I understand.” You murmured.

“Do not worry doctor, we will not let them do anything until they are completely recovered.” Toriel promised.

Dr. Gloria nodded seriously, “I’m glad to hear it, they were in very bad shape when they got here.”

“I h-hadn’t been s-sleeping well,” You said softly, trying to relieve some of the heaviness in the room.

“I’ll add a prescription for sleeping pills as well, then.” Dr. Gloria made a note, “Actually, Ma’am, if you’re going to be taking care of the patient I do have some suggestions, if you’d like to step outside and speak with me for a bit? Providing we have the patient's permission?” Dr. Gloria looked from Toriel to you.

“Of c-course.” You said immediately.

“We’re all going to take care of the nerd!” Undyne announced, “So we’ll all need to hear this!”

“If you’ll step into the hallway with me then?” Dr. Gloria suggested.

Everyone started to follow her into the hallway, but you held onto Sans’s hand beseechingly.

“everything okay?” Sans asked quietly when you were alone.

You worried your lip, “I... I almost died.” You said.

Sans winced, “yeah,” His voice broke slightly.

“I j-just…” You took a careful breath and met his eyes, “S-sans, I know s-something has b-been awkward between us l-lately, a-and I want to make it b-better, b-but first I’m going to m-make it worse, okay?”

Sans looked at you with genuine confusion.

“I, uhm, I don’t want to d-die with regrets, and if I’d d-died I would have regretted never saying anything…” You looked down at your hand in his to keep from having to look in his eyes, “Y-you don’t have to say anything, I just... I have to.”

“wha-” You shook your hand and forced yourself to meet his eyes.

“I think I’m in l-love with you Sans. You d-don’t have to feel the same, and I’m p-perfectly okay being f-friends if that’s all you want, but every since we m-met I didn’t want anyone else b-by my side as much as y-you. You’re funny, y-you make awful puns, y-you’re really sweet when you want to b-be and you’re... you’re my best friend.”

Your courage deserted you and you dropped your gaze.

“really?” Sans asked softly.

“Really.” You confirmed.

“shit. this is... shit …”

You can feel your face turning red, "I, uhm, I t-told you y-you don't have to return m-my feelings or anything... I, ah, just had to say it. Just in case something happened..."

"it's not that i don't return your feelings...

You looked up to meet Sans’s eyes in shock and hope, but he was the one looking away now, a frown on his face.

“dammit, i… you have no idea how much i just want to say i love you, too, and just be happy but... but there are things you have to know before we can really be anything.” Sans said sadly, “secrets that… are pretty big, pretty important... but they aren’t just mine, you know?”

You ran your thumb over the back of the bones that made up his hand, “I... understand that… I h-have some secrets I sh-should tell you, too...but can we t-talk s-soon then?” You asked hopefully, “B-because I’d, uhm, I’d really like…”

“tonight.” Sans said determinedly, “i’ll come by after visiting hours and, uh, we’ll lay our bones bare?” He gave you a faint smile.

“Tonight.” You beamed at him hopefully.

Outside the room where you and Sans were now smiling at each other, Dr. Gloria was eyeing the group of monsters.

“I have some concerns.” She told them.

“If this is about us being monsters…” Undyne said threateningly.

“No,” Dr. Gloria waved Undyne off, “No, you all seem perfectly close and happy. I don’t particularly care what species my patients or their families are as long as the relationships are healthy.”

“What concerns do you have?” Toriel prompted.

“There were some interesting… results to some of the tests we ran on _____.” Dr. Gloria sighed, “Normally I would only tell the patient's family this, but they did verbally okay the release of information… They got too sick, too fast. Even with Pneumonia they shouldn't have been unconscious for as long as they were. they weren’t simply lacking in a little sleep, they were completely exhausted, as though they’d not slept in a week, or used up the equivalent amount of energy in a really short time.”

“Th-they did say they weren’t sleeping…” Alphys pointed out.

“We found something in their blood tests,” Dr. Gloria said bluntly, “For awhile. We drew their blood when they entered the hospital and it had... black in it, but it didn’t register on anything we tested for and it vanished from our samples. Further collections have shown no sign, but I thought it would be best if someone was taking care of them was aware. If anything shows up I highly suggest you get them back here as soon as possible.”

“Do you think it is something bad?” Toriel looked back at your door with shadows in her eyes.

“I don’t know, I have no idea what it could be.” Dr. Gloria admitted, “They seem to be doing better now, but it’s better to be safe than sorry.”

Papyrus placed a gloved hand on your door, eyes dark with worry. Undyne reached down and took Alphys’s hand, and Frisk hugged Toriel tightly.

“We’ll watch.” Toriel promised.

The rest of the day passed in a blur. It took forever for you to convince Frisk to let Toriel take them Trick or Treating, and you were anxious for night to come faster and bring Sans back.

Finally everyone said their last goodbyes and you were left alone again.

The whole day felt surreal, and you lay in bed as the room got darker, thinking of how strange it was to have people that cared.

To have a mom that cared.

You must have dozed off at some point, because suddenly Sans was standing in the hospital room with…

“Frisk?” You ask curiously.

“yeah, the kid’s kind of a big part of this.” Sans sighed, “and we kind of need them if we’re going to start at the beginning.”

You scoot over and beckon for Frisk to come join you, they’d spent most of the day curled into your side, holding you like they thought you were going to disappear.

Then you noticed.

You almost never saw Frisk’s eyes, they were usually scrunched up behind a smile, but you could swear they were brown.

Right now one of them was brown, and the other was red.

“so,” Sans shoved his hands in his jacket pocket, “so if we’re going to start at the beginning, i guess a good place would probably be when frisk fell down…”

“No,” Frisk shook their head, “Sorry trashbag, but if we want to tell this story, this time, we need to go a little further back.”

“Frisk?” You asked in shock, you’d never heard Frisk talk before, and you’d definitely never seen them call Sans _trashbag_.

“heh, whatever you say murder child.” Sans hopped up and half sat on the mattress next to you.

You shot Sans a confused look.

 **Big Sib** , Frisk signed looking at you, **It’s a long story... but I’m not alone in my body. Signing is Frisk.**

“And talking is not Frisk.” They took a deep breath and looked at you with their mismatched eyes, “My name is Chara.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You wake up to find out that no one has any idea what's been going on with you because your parents have literally erased themselves from your life using their influence with government contacts. Your friends are all relieved you're alive, but you don't see a lot of choice and admit your parents pretty much abandoned you as soon as you turned eighteen. Your brother was pretty great though. You slip up and call Toriel 'Mom', she gladly accepts the title. You admit you've fallen in love with Sans, but he's got some secrets to tell you before he'll talk about it. Your doctor gets your permission to talk about health information with your Monster Family and admits there's something weird appearing and disappearing in your blood. Sans shows up to talk about secrets, but brings Frisk who is actually Frisk and Chara at the same time. Chara has a story to tell you


	7. Wait for it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lot of secrets are aired

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guys I'm so sorry. I had an unexpected trip sprung on me Thursday while I was still editing this chapter in my notebook. So I spent most of Thursday and Friday trying to copy this chapter from my notebook to my google document via my phone. It is now 1 AM my time, I have had four hours of sleep, and I'm posting this without checking for spelling/grammar/escaped he/she/they's and I hope you'll forgive me.  
> There is very little mention of hospitals or sickness in this chapter, so hopefully if that is a trigger for you you should be okay.  
> Thank you so much for your support for my story thus far.  
> (In one of the reviews for the past few chapters someone stumbled upon a plot point that was perfectly innocent in the review, but in a few chapters will cause some amazing angst =D )

_Once upon a time a child climbed Mt Ebott for sad reasons. They fell, and when they landed they found a world of magic and fell in love. They had everything there that they’d never had above, a family, a friend, a home, hope… but their beautiful magic world was filled of a sadness of it’s own._

_Once upon a time a child was adopted by the King and Queen, and was Saved by the Prince of a magical world. The child loved their new perfect family, but being in such a high position gave them a perfect vantage point to see how being trapped underground hurt everyone._

_Once upon a time a child poisoned themself and offered their Soul to their best friend to save all of Monsterkind._

_Once upon a time, the prince of all Monsters took his best friend’s soul, left the barrier that trapped his people in the Underground, and realized he could never kill anyone._

_Once upon a time The Fallen Human shattered their soul trying to keep the Prince’s body together until he could be healed._

_But the Prince Refused,_

_Asriel, the Prince who was so much better, and pure, and wonderful then Chara The Fallen Human, gave up pieces of his own shattering soul to glue Chara’s back together…_

_Chara, held together by Asriel’s love and determination, persisted... and slept. Left to nothing but dreams of being alone, hurt, and feeling betrayed by their best friend’s death, Chara wanted to make the world pay._

_Once upon a time a child named Frisk fell into the Underground and woke Chara’s soul up. Whether it was fate, bad luck, or that their determination was so similar, Chara’s soul was attached to Frisk._

_Once upon a time Frisk died at the hands of a monster they trusted, and learned they had the power to Save a moment in time, Reload to that moment, or Reset time to when they first fell in the Underground._

_Once upon a time Frisk made the same mistake Asriel did, and listened to Chara._

_Once upon a time Frisk and Chara slaughtered a dusty trail through the underground, killing everything they could find._

_Except for one smiley trashbag._

_Once upon a time, Frisk and Chara died. Again, and again, and again, and again until it was so funny they couldn’t stop laughing._

_Once upon a time a skeleton told Frisk and Chara they could be friends, right before he killed them again. Over their struggling souls he whispered “If we’re really friends, you won’t come back.”_

_Once upon a time, Frisk realized they wanted friends more then Chara wanted revenge. So they Reset._

_Once upon a time, Frisk struggled through the Underground, only killing when they couldn’t hold Chara back anymore._

_Once upon a time Frisk and Chara made it through the barrier, back to the surface and discovered they could no longer Save or Reload._

_Once upon a time Frisk took the angry, hurt soul living in their body with them, and let Chara scream, and yell, and breakdown. Frisk let Chara mourn, and just by being their sweet, understanding self, Frisk reminded Chara that, once upon a time, Chara had promised to free all the monsters from the Underground._

_They Reset._

_Frisk and Chara made their way through the Underground and flirted, made friends, and didn’t kill a single monster…_

_And, through Frisk’s determination, Chara got to keep their promise. The freed monsters, they got everyone aboveground._

_Then, four years later, they  Reset and did it all again._

~

Frisk, or Chara, was staring at their shoes waiting for your reaction. You weren’t sure what your reaction should be. By their own admission they had confessed to killing people, people you thought of as friends... but at the same time…

That hard line in their mouth, the grip on their sweater, was Chara. Certain you were going to damn them, and Frisk, for that they’d done.

But the eyes that were darting to you, the silent question and hope was all Frisk.

You took a deep breath. Really, what you’d learned here today was that you had two siblings in one.

“Come h-here short stuff,” You opened your arms, completely prepared for Chara’s eyes to widen, for Frisk’s smile to steal across their face, and for the armfull of two twelve-year-olds stuck in one body.

“Don’t get the wrong idea, it’s not like we like you or anything.” Chara grumbled, but you were fairly sure that it was them that tightened their arms around you at that second.

“Why?” You asked softly, hugging them, “Why d-did you Reset again?”

“that’s, uh, that’s where my story starts,” Sans admitted, “i’m not as eloquent as the murder child, they get that from tori i think. both of them have a _knife_ way with words.”

“Your words _cut_ me trashbag.” Chara said from inside your arms.

“i figured i’d take a _stab_ at lightening the situation.” Sans half smiled, then turned to the hospital window and stared out.

“so, uh, the first time we all got out… we’ll call it timeline a, about a year after we escaped the underground I was working for the embassy and doing some research-”

“You w-worked for the embassy?” You glanced down at Frisk in confusion, “I-if you worked there last time… w-why are you exhausting y-yourself working f-four jobs?”

“i mean, i guess i work there again since none of my jobs took to kindly to me not showing up while you were in the hospital, and little boss there was pretty adamant on me coming back now…” Sans said sheepishly.

Your eyes widened, “O-oh… Sans I’m so sorry…”

“nah, don’t be. i think you’ll kinda understand in a bit…” Sans sighed, “so, uh, let’s see... oh yeah, the embassy. i was doing some research on monsters and humans and some old legends and went to the local library. there was this kid there that was nice enough, but kind of distant and quiet. they pointed me to the stuff i was looking for and made a pun, which was great so i decided to visit them again,” Sans snorted, “except i musta done something to offend them, cause the next time i went to the library they all but ran away from me. i kinda thought it was, ya know, cause i was a monster but curiosity got me. i watched ‘em for a bit and monsters? they didn’t have a single problem with. they were nice, they were quiet, they didn’t make friends easy but they weren’t rude and didn’t say anything when the monsters left. as soon as i got close, though, they high tailed it in the other direction. drove me crazy for a year.”

 **We thought it was funny**. Frisk peaked up at you.

“yeah, real riot. everyone made friends with them, undyne-”

_“How are we supposed to talk again if I don’t have your number, nerd?” Undyne laughed._

_You grinned and grabbed a sticky note, scribbling on it quickly._

_“Ya know, you’re not that weird.” Undyne laughed._

“-alphys,-”

_“M-mew mew would definitely win in a fight!”_

**_Not if Edward didn’t kiss her!_ **

_“Why wouldn't he k-kiss her?”_

“-Tori practically adopted the kid.”

_“Oh my child, I don’t mind if you call me ‘Mom’,” Toriel wrapped you in a warm hug, “We are your family now.”_

“hell, even the murder child got introduced and befriended.”

**_Don’t mind Chara, they’re just like that... thank you for believing me…_ **

**_I understand Frisky Business, sometimes we can’t see all of our friends, even if they’re there._ **

“it was just me that bugged them for whatever reason.”

You didn’t move as dreams, nightmares, flashes of deja-vu bombarded you as Sans spoke.

“it took me a year and a half to get them... to get you to even talk to me, to try and convince you to be my friend.” Sans stuck his hands in his pockets. It felt so strange that Sans, who you had been so comfortable with since the beginning, would be the hardest to befriend in the past (future? paradox future? paradox past?).

“it was... crazy,” A fond smile stole across Sans’s face, “you drove me crazy, you get this look in your eyes right before you start making puns, or when you find a new topic you’re interested in, or when you bake something for someone and they really like it... it makes your eyes sparkle like the stars.”

You could feel your cheeks turning red, and if definitely didn't help that Frisk looked up and gave a deliberate eyebrow wiggle.

“being your friend... was the third best experience of my life.” Sans glanced at you with a soft look in his eyes.

“The third?” You asked, voice so soft you weren’t sure he even heard it.

“yeah, well… the second best experience was being your boyfriend...and the best experience of my life was definitely when you agreed to marry me.” Sans looked away again, his expression growing cloudy.

You desperately wished the heart monitor would stop giving away how hard your heart was beating.

Frisk gave a soft sigh and you looked down to see them signing small, so Sans couldn't see.

**It’s sad.**

“this christmas, timeline a, i proposed to you at the embassy during the christmas party with all of our friends in attendance. five minutes later purity for above all but declared war on us. it was chaos, and in the middle of it you grabbed a bomb and threw it and just started yelling.” Sans chuckled, “i didn’t even know you could yell.”

 _That man was going to throw a rock_ (bomb) _at Papyrus_ (Sans and Frisk) _._

_“Don’t you dare!”_

_("How Dare You!?")_

“you got shot for it though.”

Your shoulder, the one that had been aching in your sleep, twinged.

“purity for above stepped up attacks everywhere. they couldn't really kill monsters before, we had magic to defend ourselves, but it was like magic didn’t worry them anymore. they killed monsters, monster supporters, anyone they could. you came to work at the embassy on monster-human relationship rights… and then one day you walked home, and we didn’t see you again for weeks.” Sans leaned against the window, looking defeated.

“We saw you on a Purity for Above video,” Chara told you dully, “They… they had about twenty human partners of human monster relationships…” You saw Sans make a fist in his jacket pockets, “They killed you all on camera. You first though… it loked like you tried to sign something, but they censored it… it… it kind of destroyed a lot of hope…” Chara’s voice broke and you wondered which of the children in the body you were holding was crying.

“i, uh, i begged,” Sans said hoarsely, “i just... couldn't live in a world where you weren’t.”

“You d-didn't come back t-to me though.” You whispered, heart aching.

“you died because of me once,” Sans still wasn’t looking at you, “and... i wasn’t sure i could deal with you disliking me and actively avoiding me when i loved you so much.”

“You weren’t the only one that loved them.” Chara muttered mutinously.

 **We checked on you.** Frisk admitted, **When we moved back here. You seemed... sad, so Chara an I decided to meet you again.**

“it was like you were never gone,” Sans whispered, “you picked right back up where you left off with everyone…”

You stared at the wall across from you, thinking about the nightmares you’d been having, the dreams, the moments of deja-vu, your uncharacteristic behavior and all the odd happenings that you’d dismissed as coincidences.You thought about Sans, how you never had any problems talking to him even about things that would normally cause you to go silent and still for hours, how he could always get you to laugh with an awful pun or joke, how falling in love with Sans had been as easy as falling asleep.

“‘I love you, I’ll wait for you’,” You whispered into the dark.

“what?”

“That’s what I signed... to the camera when Purity for Above had me.” You glanced at Sans.

“You remember?” Chara asked quietly.

“No,” You shook you head, “N-not really. Dreams, nightmares… I didn’t know w-what was happening... I still d-don’t, really…”

The darkness you were watching slowly formed into a well known and loved figure.

**I actually have the answers you seek.**

**Gaster! Where have you been?** You signed, sitting straight up and nearly dislodging Frisk and Chara.

“gaster?” Sans demanded.

 **Gaster?** Frisk signed slowly, a thoughtful frown stretching across their face.

 **It is going to be a long story,** Gaster warned you, **Tell Sans I am here, and if you will translate I have an explanation for him.**

 **Will you have an explanation for me, too?** You signed, thinking sadly to the lack of contact from the only constant in your life to this point.

 **Of course I will my little one,** Gaster signed with a fond but drawn expression.

“Who are you signing to?” Chara asked, peering into the darkness.

You looked at Sans who was tense, the lights of his eyes so small they were almost gone.

“Gaster is an invisible m-monster I have known since childhood. He says he has an explanation f-for you Sans, if you’ll accept his words from me.”

Sans silently watched you, and oh so slowly nodded.

“Are Frisk and I going to get an explanation?” Chara grumbled.

 **Yes,** Gaster laughed, an odd clicky sound that was the only noise you’d ver heard him make.

“You w-will.” You confirmed.

 **It starts with a man who managed to scatter himself through space and time,** you spoke as you followed Gaster’s signs, your voice more confident because they were not your words, **I was lost, adrift alongside time but not within it. So much was lost, many of my notes, my ideas, my colleagues, and the very memory of me. Thankfully the most important things about me persisted.**

**My sons.**

**My youngest forgot me, like so many others had, but my oldest sought to recreate my mistake in order to bring me back. I watched my beloved son attempt to repair a machine that was irreparable. He tried so hard, and for so long to fix a mistake that cannot be corrected.**

**I watched him try, and fail, and fall into despair, and then depression.**

**I could watch no more.**

**I drifted into The Void. I spent an eternity floating through nothing. The Void is almost a living entity; like a monster it has magic of it’s own and it constantly hungers. I thought that given enough time it would simply devour me.**

**Instead I found something that did not belong. A human child. The child was going to die, was already dying with no magic of their own to sustain them in The Void, so I did what I had always done when experimenting.**

**I reacted instinctively.**

**I took magic from The Void, the very essence of nothingness, and filled in the cracks in their soul. I healed their soul in an unorthodox way, adding to it instead of repairing and regenerating it.**

**It had consequences.**

**The Void changed who the child was, who the child would be, and it gave them a magic that I could not train them to control.**

**I stayed. What I had done to the child allowed them to see me, allowed me to subtly influence the world around them.**

**And then the barrier fell.**

**I will admit, I was spoiled by this human child, by my human child. I had spent so long in their company, thinking of them as separate, more monster than human, more my child than the child of the parents that they were born to that it was a shock to see my sons and realize that two of my children could not see me.**

**That one of my children did not remember me.**

**I became... depressed. Bitter.**

**I warned my human child away from my sons to spare myself heartache.**

**But, like the contrary boy he had always been, my Sans sought out my human child specifically.**

**It hurt my little human to be dismissive, to be rude. It was simply not in their nature.**

You felt your cheeks heat up as Gaster smiled at you.

**My poor little human is a sweet soul, if not a little bit shy. For my sake they held out against Sans’s attempts at friendship… until I realized that in my selfishness I was hurting two of my precious children. I released my human child to befriend my son, and of course they had to take it one step further and fall in love. The only request I maintained was that Sans be kept from the knowledge of my continued existence to keep him from once more being consumed by his desire to save me.**

Gaster’s face twisted into an expression of hate so intense it made you falter for a moment.

**And then Purity for Above ruined everything. All I could do was shelter my little human’s soul in The Void and try to think of a way to salvage things.**

**But my son, my Sans, did it for me.**

**I could not save everyone’s memories, I could not even save all of my human child’s memories, but by borrowing their Perseverance, their Determination, I was able to copy my children’s friends feelings for eachother before time was Reset.**

“I think... I almost remember Gaster…”Chara mused, “From when I was alive…”

“don’t try too hard, kid,” Sans warned, “trying to remember my old man can hurt.” His voice sounded raw with pain and it physically hurt you.

You looked down at your hands, “Uhm... I d-didn’t know most of that… Gaster has been with me s-since I almost d-died in the science lab. My parents thought he w-was imaginary, a way for m-me to deal with the trauma. When I, uhm, didn’t stop talking to him it… m-made them... worse.” You admitted, “And I’ve been having… dreams of the previous timeline, apparently...” You ran a hand though Frisk’s hair, “I’ve been compulsively buying ketchup for months… I found myself adoring the color blue when before I had only... n-not minded it… I sat on a sidewalk and w-when I looked up I fell in love with a skeleton. I w-was just unofficially adopted, and m-my youngest siblings are stuck in the same body.” You took a steadying breath, “And I d-don’t care. I love it all. I d-don’t mind that I have m-memories from a time that d-doesn’t count anymore. I d-don’t care that you have all these m-memories of loving me, and I only have a f-few. I don’t care that Frisk and Chara are two people in one… F-for the first time, I f-feel like I’m h-home.”

A skeletal hand reached over and stole the hand that had been combing through Frisk’s hair.

“you mean it?” Sans whispered.

“F-forever.” You promised, then turned your head away from Sans and Frisk to cough, “I l-love you so much I’ve filled two cupboard with ketchup and couldn’t f-figure out why it made m-me sad. I loved you in another time and I love you in this time.” You felt like a huge sap, but the dark blue blush on Sans cheekbones when you peeked at him more than made it worth it.

“Not that you’re good enough for them, trashbag.” Chara grumbled.

Thanks Chara.

“my dad can see us, can he hear us?” Sans asked softly.

“Y-yeah.” You nodded.

Sans turned to where Gaster was watching you with an immeasurably fond look on his face.

“dad... thank you for making sure my life wasn’t ruined.” Sans murmured.

Gaster did not have to ask you to translate for him again.

**Sans, you and Papyrus are my greatest successes. My biggest regret was always losing you.**

Sans shook silently.

“Thank you, Dadster.” You smiled softly at him.

**I never regretted saving you, my little one.**

**Seems like you all have a lot to** **_ketchup_ ** **on.** Frisk signed innocently.

“Frisk, I have to _condiment_ you on ruining the moment.” Chara drawled.

 **I don’t** **_relish_ ** **watching sib or Sans cry.**

“Mayo you never regret this decision.”

“that’s it,” Sans declared, “i don’t have to stand for this _pun_ -ishing defamation.” He hopped up in the bed and scooted you and Frisk over slightly so he could lay next to you.

“I thought you weren’t going to stand for it?” You teased, “Now you’re just going to lie down and take it?”

Chara and Frisk shot back that they wouldn't take Sans’s challenge lying down, and as your serious conversation and all the secrets everyone had revealed dissolved into puns, you looked at Gaster and just enjoyed everything being where it belonged for once.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I will still make my next post on Sunday, if I time it right it won't be as late as this one, but I'm not a fast typer with my phone so all I can do is my best.  
> In the next chapter expect some fluff and for Reader to receive flowers!


	8. Love Doesn't Discriminate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I just got home, and it's not midnight here yet, so Happy Valentines Day (Night)! Most of this chapter was, again, edited from my phone so if you find errors, that's the origin sorry!  
> Just as I promised, here is some Fluff! Family Fluff, Sans Fluff, and Flowers for reader ;)  
> I have another trip I have to take this weekend, but I've got a lot more warning so I'll hopefully be able to clean up a lot more.  
> Thank you all for your support! You really have no idea how much the comments and kudos mean to me!!

_“-count the stars with me?”_

_“The stars are infinite, S-sans.”_

_“i know-”_

 

_“make a guy feel real bonely, ya know? pretending i’m not even here.”_

_A quick glance shows you he’s pouting._

**_What do you call a sleepy skeleton?_ **

_Delight spreads across his face at being acknowledged for the first time in eighteen and a half months._

_“what?”_

**_Lazy Bones_ **

_He smiles at you so brightly it almost hurts._

_“the name’s sans. sans the skeleton.”_

**_I’m-_ **

_~_

A few days later you were finally -Finally!- getting out of the hospital. Dr. Gloria had spent most of the morning letting you know how often you should be taking the antibiotics and cough syrup Toriel had already picked up for you, and reiterating that you _absolutely_ needed to get completely better before you did anything that might stress your immune system.

Or you would die.

Again.

Speaking of dying, after everyone had subsided that night, Sans had taken Chara and Frisk home and let you digest everything you’d heard and learned. Honestly a large part of you was just relieved you had an explanation for everything weird in your life recently. Gaster had taken the time to explain that he had left so suddenly because he was worried his reticence to be revealed to Sans would impact your relationship again. You’d been a little worried that he was upset Sans knew about him now, but he had assured you that he’d spent a lot of time thinking and, as long as Sans didn’t bury himself trying to fix the unfixable machine again he had no regrets.

Everything was good.

Well, not everything, there was one little problem you were having right now.

 **Sans, why did you bring me three outfits?** You signed, shifting through the pile of clothes Sans had deposited. Were those leggings? Did you own leggings?

“the doc said that the cold could make you sick again.” Sans said firmly, “it’s one outfit.”

 **Sans, you can’t expect me to wear thermal socks, leggings, two pairs of sweatpants, a t-shirt, a sweater, a hoodie, a scarf, and a hat.** You protested.

“we already tested on frisk with a similar outfit to make sure they’d fit.” Sans assured you.

**Sans.**

“come on babe, the doc said you could die.” Sans eyes fell to the ground and he looked obviously upset.

Damn it. You’d never be able to say no to him when he looked like that.

“F-fine.” You sighed.

Sans gave you a tentative smile and stepped behind the curtain to give you privacy.

“so, uh, the kiddos and I have one more person for you to meet. they remember the resets, but we’ve been kind of keeping him away from you cause he’s… a dick.” Sans told you as you struggled into the leggings.

“Who is it?” You struggled into the sweatpants.

“uh, you’ll find out later.” Sans sounded nervous. You frowned at the curtain, but didn’t say anything.

You finally got dressed.

And felt ridiculous. Gaster signed to you that you looked like someone who would not be getting sick again before fading away, presumably to get home before you.

Sans wheeled you out to Papyrus’s convertible, which had it’s top up for the first time. The brisk November (And no one was more upset you’d missed Halloween than you, you’d been excited to see Sans and Papyrus’s reaction to your skeleton costume. Although Toriel had taken millions of pictures for you of Frisk, Papyrus, Alphys, and Undyne, you’d saved your favorites to your phone. Frisk and Chara had dropped a ridiculously large bag of candy off at the hospital for you the next day, letting you know they’d trick or treated for you as well as themselves so you could feel included)  air felt good against the uncomfortable heat of wearing so many layers.

You loved your friends, but you were glad Sans had convinced them to let him drive you home. You hadn’t actually had a lot of alone time with Sans since the night he’d brought you Frisk and Chara, and everyone aired their secrets.

You had dreams though.

The nightmares of what you now knew were fragments of your time with Purity for Above were banished for the time, replaced with sweet moments between you and your family.

Between you and Sans.

They weren’t whole memories, whole moments of time, but half a sentence, a wink, a kiss, and terrible terrible jokes.

“Sans?” You murmured softly as he watched the road with concentration.

“mnn?”

“What d-do you call a sleepy skeleton?”

He glanced at you, furrowing his brow bone as he tried to guess.

“Lazy Bones.” You said quickly, before he succeeds in remembering.

Sans’s face smoothed and he looked at you with delighted disbelief, “that’s the first joke you ever told me.” He murmured.

“I r-remembered it last night.” You smiled, “The l-look on your face…”

Sans can’t stop grinning as he pulls to a stop in front of your house and you try to get out of the car without assistance, but Sans cheats by teleporting to your side and wrapping an arm around your waist.

You consider holding out for a moment, but tentatively leaned your head against his skull.

“let’s get you inside before you get cold.” Sans teased you.

“N-not an issue.” You’re a little too warm under your layers.

Sans drags you up the porch and opens the door to a dark living room. You frowned slightly, you were fairly certain you locked the door to your house before you went to work the day you went to the hospital and no one had asked for your keys.

“Welcome Home!” The lights flicked on and you found yourself faced with Toriel, Papyrus, Undyne, Alphys, and Frisk (and Chara presumably as one of Frisk’s eyes was red again).

You turned bright red.

“You did not think we would let you come home to an empty house, did you my child?” Toriel asked with a knowing grin.

“i may have broken into your house so i could let them in.” Sans admitted with a shameless grin.

“Yeah, at least the Smiley Trashbag uses his powers for _something_ useful occasionally.” Said the flower sitting on your counter.

_“Don’t pity me!” Flowey spat_

 

_“Yeah well, it’s not like I like you, I just put up with you for Chara and Frisk’s sake.” Flowey turned his petaled face away._

 

_“Look, I don’t do emotions but… my friends like having you around. So promise you’ll stick around?”_

**_I promise._ **

 

“Hello Flowey,” You said dazedly, swaying.

Sans grabbed you with a panicked look and everyone stepped towards you with worry on their faces.

“I’m f-fine!” You assured them quickly, as darkness pounded at the edge of your temples, “Fine!”

“Sit my child,” Toriel pulled you from Sans towards your couch, “I did not know that you knew Flowey, Frisk is awful protective of people meeting him.”

“I had… s-some advanced warning.” You half lied. Your heartbeat receded from your ears and the blackness slowly faded from the corners of your vision.

“I bet you were just _dying_ to meet little ol’ me.” Flowey cackles from the counter.

_“...stick around…”_

**_I promise._ **

You winced again.

“I see that Sans convinced you to dress warmly,” Toriel beamed at you, “I am so glad! The doctor stressed it was very important for you to stay warm to us.”

“Yeah nerd! Here!” You were unprepared for the blanket avalanche Undyne dumped on you, “We got every blanket we could find for you!” She was muffled through all the cloth, but Toriel rescued you and tucked the blankets around you in a much more orderly manner.

Suitably restrained against the couch, you suddenly find that you’re alone with Toriel. You raised an eyebrow at your new mom and glanced around, even Flowey had disappeared from the counter top.

“We’ve been a bit spoiled lately,” Toriel told you, sitting next to where she’d tucked your feet in, “We’re all used to getting you to ourselves for awhile everyday, so we agreed we’d all take a few minutes with you for ourselves.” To your surprise and horror you see her eyes were tearing up, “We were… suddenly faced with not seeing you ever again and it was a very hard experience.”

“M-mom, I’m fine. P-promise! I’ll b-be better soon.” You assured her.

“I apologize my child, having one of my children sick is a very… difficult experience for me,” Toriel thought Chara had died to sickness you remember with a pang, “It is worse because magic so often makes someone sicker rather than better.”

You frowned, “It d-does?”

“Yes,” Toriel smoothed your hair back, “For monsters it’s because we are made entirely of magic, so our magic gets sick with us, and it has the potential to overwhelm us if another monster uses their magic to try to heal us. For humans, using magic or having magic on them when they get sick often boosts the illness…” She gave a shaky laugh, “I am sorry my child, I did not mean to turn this time into a lesson.”

“It’s g-good to know.” You assured her, suddenly swamped with guilt.

Was using The Other Space, The Void, considered using magic? Had you unintentionally put yourself in the hospital and put your family through so much grief?

“Regardless, I wanted you to know that I love you and I am but a phone call away if you ever need me.” Toriel promised, “I know it is strange for you, being an adult, but I do want you to think of my as your mother, and that means you can call me for anything.”

You bit back the emotions rising in your throat, if you started crying you’d start coughing again and you didn’t want to worry anyone any more, “I w-will. You’ve... You’re m-more of a mom to me than... than anyone has ever been.”

Toriel hugged you tightly around the blankets, “I will be out on the porch with the others,” She told you, “Do not hesitate to call for me?”

You nod in affirmative.

Toriel stepped out, and Frisk came in carrying Flowey.

“I don’t know why I have to be here.” Flowey was grumbling, “I don’t want to see them.”

“Flowey?” You said softly, drawing the attention of the annoyed plant, “I b-broke my p-promise. I’m sorry.”

Frisk frowned, and Chara started to say something, but you shook your head focusing on Flowey.

“You did.” Frisk placed the flower on the table in front of you, “You promised to stick around for Chara and Frisk, and then you died and made Frisk Reset.”

You nodded.

Flowey’s scowl grew more intense, “You don’t get it! I didn’t remember them! I hurt them, and worse others hurt them! Toriel forgot she was their mom all for _you_!”

You looked at Frisk and Chara who were not looking at you.

“It was worth it.” Chara said shortly.

“Was it really?” Flowey demanded, “Was it worth it t-”

“Never again.” You said shortly.

They looked at you.

“Never Reset again for me.” You were more confidant in this than anything else, “I... I c-can’t promise not to go away again… I shouldn’t h-have promised last time, b-but don’t Reset again.” You bit your lip, “It’s n-not fair to either of you.”

 **We don’t want you to die.** Frisk signed.

“People die Frisky Business,” You told them sadly, “B-but if I die again… I’d rather know y-you’re all living happily than l-living the same four years over and over again.”

Chara was the one looking at you now, you knew it.

“Yeah well…” Flowey grumbled, “Don’t die again and make it an issue, alright idiot?”

“Frisk, Chara?” You prompted, “Please? L-live?”

 **Promise.** Frisk signed slowly.

“I understand.” Chara told you.

You smiled and wiggled your arms out from under the death grip of the blankets. Frisk scooped Flowey’s pot up and, much to the flower’s consternation, drew them into the hug.

“This is so undignified.” Flowey grumbled.

“Sweetheart, y-you’re a flower. You’re n-not dignified.” You pointed out.

“Lies, lies and slander.”

“Don’t die?” Chara requested.

“I’ll stick around as l-long as I can, I’ve g-got some little siblings t-to torment.”

Frisk stood up and beamed at you.

Alphys came in next, quiet and thoughtful as she sat on the coffee table where Flowey’s pot had been placed.

“You used m-magic.” She said with certainty.

You nodded.

“The doctor couldn’t figure out how you got so sick so fast,” Alphys watched you, “And she s-said she saw something in your blood.”

“I didn’t know I could use m-magic,” You admitted, “I didn’t know what I w-was doing was magic.”

Alphys nodded, “Monster’s don’t have veins,” She explained, “But if we did, they’d be filled with magic. I think your magic was in your blood because you’d used it and it g-got sick, too.”

“Mom, uh, Toriel said m-magic boosts the sickness.” You offered.

Alphys nodded, “It makes sense I…” She looked down at her claws and then looked at you with Determination, “When you get better I’ll help you with your magic. I don’t want you to get s-sick again, you’re my friend I don’t have many of those…”

“I’ll always b-be your friend, Alphys.” You promised.

“I’ll be your friend, too, always.” Her claws shook for a moment, “Don’t… don’t use your magic again, until I say?”

You bit your lip, but nodded, “S-sure thing _Dr._ Alphys.”

She blushed, “I’m d-doing some research on humans, I d-don’t want to feel helpless like that again.”

You reached over and put a hand over her claws, touched.

Papyrus came in next. He wasted no time in picking you, blankets and all, up and hugging you tightly.

“HUMAN, I… I Was Very Worried About You.” He settled you back on the couch, tucking the blankets in even tighter than Toriel had, although he left your hands free, “It Was Very Much Like The Time The Mean Human Hit You In The Head, Only You Could Not Reassure Us You Would Be Well, And You Would Not Wake.”

 **It won’t happen again Papyrus, the hospital knows you are my family now.** You assured him. You’d gone through an impossible amount of paperwork to get everyone listed as family and allow the hospital to disclose information to them in case something else happened.

“I Would Prefer You Not Go Back There Again.” Papyrus sighed, “But I Know That Sometimes Humans Cannot Help It.”

**I’ll take more care so you won’t have to worry, Papyrus.**

“You Had Better,” Papyrus mock scolded, “I Have A Difficult Time With Sans And His 1 HP, I Do Not Need To Worry About You In The Human Hospital.”

You frowned, **What do you mean 1 HP? Isn’t HP very important to monsters?**

“It Is Indeed, Human, But HP Is Short For HoPe.” Papyrus seemed sad, “Sans Has Never Had Very High HoPe.”

Your heart clenched slightly, you knew a tiny bit about HP from what you’d looked up online, but what you knew absolutely about it was that the more HP a monster had the harder they were to kill.

 **I’ll help you keep him safe Papyrus.** You promised.

“Hmm…” Papyrus mused, “If You Keep Him Safe, And He Keeps You Safe, It Will Be Easier For Me To Keep Both Of You Safe! Genius Nyeheheheheh!”

 **Great idea, Papyrus.** You beamed.

Undyne came in next.

Well, Undyne ran in next and dove on top of you.

“We’ve got some new rules for you nerd!” She declared, “First of all! If you ever get sick again I’m going to carry you over my head to the human doctor if you try to say you’re fine! Second! If You ever scare me like that again I’m going to gently throw you out a window.”

You narrowed your eyes, considering how to gently throw a person out a window.

“I’ll b-be more careful next time.” You promised, “N-no need to throw m-me out a window.”

“You’d better be more careful!” Undyne grumbled, “You’re no match for me, so I’d have no problem kidnapping you for your own safety, My ATK and DEF are way better than yours.”

“ATK? DEF?”

“Ya know, Aim To Kill and DesirE to Fight.”

What was it with monsters and these crazy acronyms?

“I d-don’t know what that m-means Undyne.”

Undyne waved a hand, still laying on you, “It means I’d kick your butt, nerd, and then kidnap you to a doctor.”

“I... I’m fairly c-certain you’re using that w-word wrong.” You decided.

“What? Kidnapping is taking someone against their will, right?”

You considered, “...fair enough…”

“Whatever, point is you’re not allowed to worry us again. Strictly against the rules! You missed Anime Night and Halloween! One right after the other!”

“I’ll b-be better with the n-next Holiday.” You promised.

“I’m holding you to that!” Undyne declared.

Finally Sans came in.

He sat down on your legs and grinned at you when you pouted at him.

“so, uh, apparently this is where i either threaten you to never do that again, or let you know how much i love you, right?” He joked.

 **Did you hear them, or was there a conference happening?** You snorted.

“they’re out there comparing notes to make sure they covered everything, though alphys is being a bit quiet.” Sans shrugged, “is, uh, is my dad here?”

You glanced over at one of the chairs where Gaster had been watching the whole spectacle with a happy smile.

“MmHm.”

“this could, uh, get a bit awkward for him.”

Gaster laughed, **I will leave my children to their antics.** He signed and faded.

You’d never seen him smile so happily before.

“He… he s-said he’d g-give us privacy.”

“Kay.” Sans shifted so he was leaning into you, almost laying on you.

It was different than Undyne laying on you, she’d kind of sprawled like you were a bed, Sans tried to tangle himself in you despite all the blankets you were covered in. He rested his forehead to yours.

“don’t die please?” Sans asked softly, “you, uh, scared the life out of these old bones collapsing on me in the street.”

“Didn’t m-mean to. Won’t do this again.” You closed your eyes and nuzzled into him slightly.

“kay.” Sans sighed, “i, uh, love you babe.”

“L-love you too.” You told him. He grinned, snuggled into you, and promptly went to sleep.

At some point everyone came back into the house. Papyrus and Undyne promptly emptied your cupboards of all spaghetti ingredients and started cooking.

Toriel kept them from burning the house down.

Frisk and Chara, with input from Flowey, chose a movie and sat next to the couch, leaning their head on you.

You dozed. It honestly surprised you how soft Sans was, being made out of bone, but even with his head tucked in your neck you had no problem slipping in and out of a light sleep.

Toriel got you to take your medicine around Sans, but you fell asleep after that.

When you woke up again, there was a sticky note stuck to Sans’s skull.

‘HUMAN, I HAVE DECIDED YOU ARE PROBABLY MORE IN NEED OF MY BEDTIME STORY THAN I AM TONIGHT. PLEASE KEEP SANS FOR THE NIGHT NYEHEHEHEHEh. THERE IS WONDERFUL SPAGHETTI MADE BY THE GREAT PAPYRUS AND THE GREAT UNDYNE IN YOUR REFRIGERATOR.’

Undyne had also drawn a small picture of her giving an obvious wink.

“s’matter?” Sans yawned when your quiet laughter shook him awake.

“Papyrus h-has given you t-to me for the night.” You snickered.

“cool, i’m already comfortable.” Sans grinned down at you.

You glanced out the window and saw it was dark.

“...Sans?”

“hm?”

“Will you l-look at the stars with me?”

Sans drew back and gave you a worried look, “it’s pretty cold out there…”

“I’m s-still wearing three layers.” Sans didn’t look convinced, “I’ll take a b-blanket?”

Sans sighed and nodded, reluctantly getting off of you.

You grabbed two of the thicker blankets and drug Sans outside to watch the sky.

“i love the stars.” Sans admitted quietly as you settled down on a blanket and drew another one over the two of you, “the sun was… great coming out from the underground… but there was this cave that had crystals we used to pretend were stars? couldn’t come close to comparing to the real thing.”

“I used to make w-wishes on stars.” You told him, “R-ryan taught me a… a rhyme and we’d make wishes t-together.”

“yeah? what was it?” Sans glanced at you.

“D-did I never tell you?” You frowned slightly.

“was actually kind of hard to get you to talk about your family last time,” Sans admitted, “i think we only watched the stars once… and uh…” He blushed, “it was at the embassy, when i proposed.”

_“would you like to start a new project?”_

_“W-what is it?”_

_“i'd like you to count the stars with me?”_

_“The stars are infinite, S-sans.”_

_“i know, it’s a long term project… but i’d like to spend forever with you, so it seems kinda fitting...”_

“Oh,” You let out a low breath at the memory.

“yeah, it was cheesy.” Sans snorted.

“S-so is wishing on stars…” You reached over to lace your fingers with his, “Star light, s-star bright, I wish I may, I w-wish I might have this wish I wish tonight.”

“that’s nice…” Sans tightened his hand around yours, “what sort of stuff did you wish for?”

_I wish I had a real family._

_I wish, when I’m an adult, I can spend a lot of time with Ryan._

_I wish I could make Gaster smile a real smile._

_I wish I had more people who loved me._

“Kid stuff. M-most of it even came true.” He glanced at him.

Sans blushed a faint blue and pressed a kiss to your lips, “i’m glad you’re home.”

“Me too.”

You leaned into him and watched the sky.

“would you, uh… would you sing to me?” Sans asked quietly. You looked up at him, a blush rising in your cheeks, “i, uh, kind of remember hearing you sing… when i had the nightmare…”

“I’m n-not that great.” You blushed.

“you aren’t great, you’re perfect.” Sans squeezed your hand, “you don’t... have to.”

You stared up at the sky for a moment, tracing familiar shapes in the stars.

“You are my Sunshine, my only Sunshine,” You sang, smiling as Sans leaned into you, “You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away.” What had you done before you’d met Sans and your family? Your life before them seemed… faint and distant, “The other night dear, while I lay sleeping, I dreamt I held you in my arms. When I awoke dear I was mistaken, so I hung my head and cried. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you, Please don’t take my sunshine away.” You couldn’t imagine how losing Sans would feel, it gnawed a huge hole at you just thinking about it. It had always seemed silly in book when people lost the will to live just because someone they loved left them, but you’d never been loved like this, or loved like this. “I’ll always love you, and want you happy. You do not have to fear the dark. I’ll be right there, dear, be right beside you, and I will love you all of my days. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know dear how much I love you, please don’t take my sunshine away.”

“thanks.” Sans breathed.

You spent another hour watching stars with Sans before he insisted you head back inside. You spent half a second glancing back at the stars, thinking about the wishes you’d made as a kid.

Three of them came true.

You had no way of knowing that all of your wishes would eventually come true.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Flowers/Flowey same difference right?  
> Unfortunately Reader did miss Halloween, They actually woke up on Halloween day.  
> I'm thinking of doing a Halloween one-shot where reader never fell sick.  
> And gee, that last line probably isn't hinting at anything majorly plot related, huh?  
> I'll have the next chapter up Tuesday, probably at night but hopefully not as late at night as this one.  
> There's going to be dreams/memories in the beginnings of chapters from now on so you can keep up with reader!


	9. If there's a reason I'm still alive...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You make some decisions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love you all so much, and want you to know I read every one of your reviews several times!  
> That being said, don't be afraid to criticize me, cause I'm just going to use that to get stronger as a writer.  
> Thaaaat being said, I can tell you right now Saturday's chapter is going to be hard since Friday and Saturday are the anniversary of the worst day of my life. I strongly considered taking Saturday off posting, but if I don't spend at least some part of the day editing, I'll spend it locked up somewhere dark so...yeah  
> Also, if the Format of memory fragments bothers you guys, let me know and I'll see about changing it up.

_“If it was anyone else, would you hesitate?”_

 

_“You can redeem yourself!”_

_“I already did.”_

 

_“-the best you can do?”_

_~_

 

You lay with Sans on the couch and watched the darkness patiently until Gaster appeared and sat back down in his chair, smiling knowingly at you.

 **Why did you tell me to lie to Dr K?** You signed very carefully around the skeleton snoozing on you.

Gaster settled his chin on his hand thoughtfully and watched you. You waited patiently, meeting his eyes.

 **You told Dr K about the monster friends you were making last time. He then told your parents, who were not very happy. They… changed the terms of your contract. You would, of course, continue seeing Dr K but they wanted you out of this town. They offered to take you home, set you up to learn something specialized. You just had to swear no more monsters… You’d been doing so well, opening up and flowering... I think they started to see what they had thrown aside.** He signed slowly.

Oh.

You glanced down at Sans.

**I turned them down.**

**Spectacularly, you weren’t even dating Sans yet.** Gaster beamed at you.

You grinned at other you’s actions, and for a moment you could see their faces.

 _“I_ _would choose any one of them over you anyday.”_

 **T** **hey didn’t take it well, did they?**

Gaster glanced away, his smile fading, **They did not.**

You nodded and looked back down at Sans, watching him sleep for a few minutes.

**Dr K never really helped me, did he?**

You glanced at Gaster, who was watching you with a sad expression.

**No… He never actively hurt you, but he did not understand how to help you. You are different than other humans, and that is my fault. You are a magical human, and you require magic just as any monster does.**

**Is that why I was able to make friends with everyone? Like I was normal? Because I am normal to monsters?**

Gaster stood up and brushed a kiss you could not feel across your forehead.

 **LIttle one, you would never had been ‘normal’, you are extraordinary in every way. Your magic is… unique, even to monsters. Your friends are all very powerful, they can sense your soul and that is what drew them to you.** Gaster assured you.

 **My soul is me, everything I ever experienced, or knew, or felt.** You closed your eyes as you remembered Undyne’s explanation when she first trained you. **Thanks Dadster.**

You weren’t sure if Gaster lingered, you couldn't bring yourself to open your eyes.

You had thinking to do.

You refused to continue lying about your friends, as though you were ashamed of them. That wasn’t fair to them, and it made you feel wrong. You didn’t need the financial assistance your parents provided, it had simply been easier to take it and not argue.

But you didn’t need it.

You didn’t need them.

You barely slept, alternating between watching the clock and closing your eyes, trying to fool yourself into falling asleep.

At eight o’clock you gave up and carefully wiggled your phone out of your pocket.

“Dr. Konstantin’s Office, Peggy speaking.”

“Hey P-peggy, it’s _____.”

“Oh hey Doll! You still sick?”

“No, well I m-mean I am but that’s n-not…”

“It’s fine Doll, I’ll let Dr K know you’re canceling this week’s session.” Peggy assured you.

“I’m n-not. I’m cancelling all… my appointments.”

Silence met you.

“Doll, would you hold on while I get the doc?”

“Sure Peggy.”

Sans had started to stir slightly at the sound of your voice, but you hummed and gently run your free hand up and down the back of his shirt, feeling the bumps of his ribs and spine.

“_____?”

“Hey Dr K.”

“What’s this I hear about you canceling your appointments indefinitely?”

You kept running your hand up and down Sans’s back, “Dr K, I appreciate everything you’ve d-done but… you haven’t r-really been helping me… for a few y-years.”

“Your parents won’t be happy,” Dr K warned gently.

You thought back to Undyne in the hospital.

“Fuck ‘em.” You felt a grin spread across your face, “They haven’t c-cared about m-me in awhile. I d-don’t need them anymore. I d-don’t think I ever d-did.”

“...The choice is yours to make, but… I do think it is a mistake. I’ll keep ten on Thursdays open for a while, okay? In case you change your mind.”

“Sure.”

You hung up and snuggled into Sans.

“Sorry I woke you.”

“s’fine, didn’t want to interrupt, seemed important.” He mumbled sleepily at you.

“There are… m-more important things.” You sighed and finally fell asleep.

Over the next day you were reminded exactly why you hated being sick. No one let you move, you were kept firmly on the couch unless you were using the restroom or showering. This was, of course, accomplished by having everyone switch their library ‘guard’ shift to your living room.

Speaking of the library, David had called to assure you that you had more than enough sick time built up over the years to cover yourself, and you were absolutely not allowed to come back to work until Sans told him you were well again. It was over the course of this conversation that you found out that David was the one who had called Sans and let him know how sick you were.

You couldn't bring yourself to be annoyed since if Sans hadn’t found you, there was a good chance you would have died.

Again.

Which would never stop being weird to think about.

Or sort of remember.

On Saturday, since Anime night, Frisk’s Training, and Papyrus’s cooking lesson took place at your house anyway, Undyne and Alphys had decided to stay another night with you.

Which was more or less just an excuse to interrogate you with no innocent witnesses.

“So,” Undyne drawled suggestively, “You and Sans were looking awfully cuddly last night…”

You turned your eyes up to the ceiling to keep yourself from blushing, and missed Alphys pulling a well worn notebook out.

 **He’s nice to cuddle with.** You signed evasively.

“Oh is he?” You couldn’t stop the red that crept into your cheeks at Undyne’s tone, “And of course this sudden cuddliness is completely spontaneous right? Just pals bein pals? Nothin more to it?”

You may have missed her taking it out, but there was no missing Alphys poised, pen against paper, to write down everything you guys were saying down when you let your gaze drop from the ceiling.

 **Not completely spontaneous,** You admitted, **Alphys, what are you doing?**

“She’s storyboarding the biographical manga about our lives, don’t worry you look great in the rough draft. Now CONFESS TO WHAT HAPPENED BETWEEN YOU AND THE SKELETON!”

Undyne had stood up and was pointing accusingly at you. If you weren’t sick she probably would have been pointing a magical spear at you. (Which she hadn’t done since your cough had first developed. Why hadn’t that tipped you off that magic and sick didn’t mix? Undyne never went out of her way to _avoid_ hitting someone with a spear)

 **I... told him I loved him.** You signed, and buried your face in your hands so you couldn't see the looks on their faces.

“Oh!” Alphys sounded excited.

“Don’t keep back the details Nerd! I need to draw this later!” Undyne insisted, pulling your hands away from your face, “You two have been dancing around each other since we met!”

If only Undyne knew.

 **I told him in the hospital,** You signed slowly, trying to ignore Alphys scribbling to keep up with your hands, **I got a glimpse of my mortality, and it… I would have regretted it if I never said anything, even if he didn’t feel the same.**

Undyne frowned at the reminder of your close call and Alphys moved from the chair she’d been perched in to sit on your feet as a quiet reminder that she was there for you.

After a few minutes of thoughtful silence, Undyne’s grin grew again, “Then you made out, right?”

 **Undyne!** You protested.

“Come on Nerd! We’re your best friends! We need details!” Undyne was grinning like the cat that got the Canary.

Or like the fish that got the cat that got the canary.

 **He… We…** He told you about an alternative timeline where you had died and he had begged a twelve year old to Reset his and everyone’s life so you could be alive again. Probably not the response Undyne was expecting.

The longer you took trying to think of how to properly phrase Sans’s response, the more worried Undyne began to look.

“Shit, he didn’t bond you while we weren’t looking did he?”

 **Bond?** You frowned at Undyne.

“Did he pull your soul out?” Undyne demanded.

 **No? I was sick Undyne, Sans wouldn’t do anything to endanger me.** You assured her.

“Ughhhh, then what did he dooooo? You scared me for a second!” Undyne grumbled.

**What is bonding?**

“I-it’s sort of Monster Marriage? But, uhm, different. And, uhm... it’s not… legally recognized yet…” Alphys told you.

That... sounded very familiar.

 **Why isn’t it legally recognized? And what made you think Sans and I could get married sitting in a hospital room?** You signed slowly, trying to get a grip on the recognition of bonding.

(Sans definitely would have told you if you’d been married right? He said you’d been engaged, and you remembered parts of that. Marriage seemed like something you would remember.)

“Well, you don’t have to have witnesses to a bonding? Like most people have their family, but some couples just do it by themselves. And then there’s not like a specific way to end it? Like when Toriel broke her bond to Asgore she _broke_ it, but sometimes Bonds just... end? Without any reason? And only the couple knows about it.” Undyne shrugged, “The Human Government don’t like that there’s not a ton of paperwork involved I guess, and it’s difficult to track.”

“And they’re dragging their feet on legalizing human marriage between monsters, or monsters and humans.” Alphys sighed.

You looked between them with realization, **You’re bonded.**

“Almost two years now.” Undyne boasted, grinning at Alphys, “We did it with Frisk, Papyrus, Toriel, Asgore, Mettaton, and Sans standing as our family.”

You beamed at them, but inside your heart hurt a little. Two years, huh? You’d probably been there last time then…

You shook the part of you where that thought had originated, you couldn’t blame Sans for trying to protect you.

“You didn’t bond with Sans, right?” Undyne asked suspiciously, “Cause if you did it without us I’ll have to throw you off a roof. Gently.”

 **I didn’t bond with Sans in the hospital room, or without you,** You assured her, **We’re…** Datemates? Engaged? Did an engagement count if it had been the past/future? **Dating.**

“Alright! So, you confessed your undying love to him and he responded by…” Undyne pressed and Alphys was holding her pen at the ready again.

You considered, then decided that there was no way Undyne would leave you alone until she got some answers.

 **He said it wasn’t the right time and snuck into my room after visiting hours,** You weren’t lying, **Then we spent a good part of the night talking about our lives before he said he loved me, too.**

“Good enough, we’ll improvise the dialogue.” Undyne decided.

You raised an eyebrow, **You aren’t serious about that Manga, right?**

“This is volume thirteen.” Alphys beamed, “You were introduced in Volume twelve.”

Of course you were.

You considered for a few moments, then finally asked Alphys for the first twelve volumes.

By Tuesday you were going just a little insane. It took ages for things to stop tasting like cough syrup, and your friends kept you fairly trapped on the couch.

There was one thing to occupy your mind while you were couch bound. Sans had weathered as many questions on bonds and other various matters as he could while steadily turning bluer and bluer until he disappeared, and reappeared with a huge pile of books on monsters relations, monster biology, and every bit of Monster information that wasn’t common knowledge and could contribute to the answers you wanted. You kept a notepad and a pile of pens nearby as you worked on your personal project from another time.

Finding a way to record Bonds that the government would recognize, that wouldn’t interfere too much with a monster’s privacy.

Bonding, you found as you researched, was an incredibly intimate undertaking and, as much fun as you had had teasing Sans while you got the information, you couldn’t help but blush a bit as you read.

Bonding involved mixing your soul and magic with another monster. It was a process where you turned everything that made you you over to the other monster, and when you got your everything back it was twined with their essence. While some monsters chose to do this privately, usually monsters chose to have their families nearby to return them to who they were if they got lost. You’d found a few chapters on Bonds gone bad where the monsters weren’t able to fully withdraw from their partner and accidentally shattered their own souls, and a few where the monsters souls and or magic wasn’t compatible and the bonding went terribly wrong. Once your soul and magic was your own again, however, it came with a strong knowledge of where your partner was and a general sense of if they were okay… as well as the possibility of future children. Monsters couldn’t have children without a bond.

Or So you’d read.

It was slow going, to be fair.

A long week drug by and Sans took you to the hospital to get your checkup and bill of clean health from Dr. Gloria. She took an excruciatingly long time, and a few blood samples, but finally declared you one hundred percent better, which meant three big things for you.

First, you were once again allowed to wear one layer of clothing at a time.

Second, you could get off the couch and go back to work.

And Finally, and most excitingly, Alphys had agreed to help you learn how to use your magic when you were well again.

Gaster seemed a touch worried, and honestly you had a bit of trepidation as well, but you wanted to be able to defend yourself if Purity for Above became as active as they had been in the previous timeline.

More importantly than defending yourself, you’d be able to defend your family.

Or die trying.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really interested in what you guys think Purity for Above is doing right now?
> 
> Also, for anyone who got excited to see Ryan, he's not coming in for...eh quite a few chapters. Definitely not before in story Christmas. Being a big brother himself, Sans is going to Freak Out just a bit when he meets Ryan c(= Trust me when I say it's gonna be beautiful and if you're anything like me, it's going to be hysterical.


	10. We Laugh and We Cry and We Break

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which we find out Gaster made an inaccurate assumption.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's short, I have so much I could have added but i severely overestimated my emotional health for this week. Huge shoutout to Moss_Flowers for giving me the motivation to get this much done.  
> Tomorrow's the anniversary of the day I lost the man who raised me.  
> Do me a favor and, if your on good terms with your father/father figures, call them tomorrow and tell them you love them?

_“You were always very good at lying to yourself.”_

 

_“Is it proper to have a child in here?”_

_“They know better than to get in trouble.”_

 

_“Surviving the fire was a miracle, and a possibility. Surviving the gas? That’s a lot less likely. That they survived both is either really promising for the experiment, or very worrying.”_

 

_~_

 

Thursday morning, the first Thursday in forever that you didn’t have to even think about going to Dr K’s, Alphys was at your house well before Sans.

Sans still had Thursdays off, for the most part. His new Bosses (Frisk and Asgore, who you had yet to meet) were very understanding about his reasons for wanting time on Thursdays off, so he had to come in to check and make sure there was nothing urgent, then as long as he kept his phone on him he was free to be wherever he felt.

“Are you sure you want to get started before Sans gets here?” Alphys asked nervously. You glanced at the clock thoughtfully. It was nine o’clock, and Sans was free to leave the Embassy at nine thirty.

 **Will it make you uncomfortable to help me alone?** You asked. You really, really wanted to get started, but not if it would upset Alphys.

Alphys considered carefully, “No, I just… I’ve never taught anyone how to use their magic before… Sans has, at least, taught Papyrus…”

 **You’ll do great,** You assured her, **It’ll be good practice if you and Undyne ever have children.** You wiggled your eyebrows suggestively.

Alphys turned bright red. “Let’s start!” She squeaked. You grinned, but gave Alphys a second to stop blushing and calm herself down.

“Okay,” Alphys took a steadying breath, “Okay, y-you used magic before you went to the hospital. What did you do?”

That was easy enough. For Alphys’s benefit, the window into The Void that you opened up was much larger than usual. You both peered into the window of infinite blackness, then you paused.

**Oh yeah…**

You reached in and retrieved your lunch from two weeks past, **I forgot I put that in there.**

“What is that?” Alphys stared into the darkness.

**The Void.**

Alphys looked at you oddly, “You… use The Void to store your lunch?”

 **Sometimes groceries, too.** You admitted.

Alphys’s expression grew more incredulous.

You shifted sheepishly, **Things don’t age in The Void, I’ve always stored stuff in there.**

“I... I feel like that makes sense... but it's still so strange…” Alphys marveled, “So when you need... Well, how does it feel to open The Void?”

You raised your hands to respond, then stopped and actually thought about it. It had been second nature to open the window to The Void, even when you were a child. You didn’t really think about it, you just _did_ it.

Involuntarily you thought back to the first time you’d opened a window and realized that, that wasn’t necessarily true. The first time hadn’t been instinct, the first time had been desperate, life or death… The first time had been before you met Gaster.

The first time had been the reason you met Gaster.

You glanced out of the corner of your eye at the silent Skeleton, watching you with an expression of expectation. Gaster knew you could do this, knew you could figure out how to use magic.

Very slowly you reached out and closed the window to The Void, focusing like you never had before on what you were doing.

It felt… odd. Like you were pushing yourself away from a table, but at the same time you were stepping away from the edge of a cliff.

You started to open another window, then paused.

“Alphys… c-could you pull my soul out?”

Alphys was hesitant, “I... I don’t think it would be a good idea to… put your soul in there…”

“I w-won’t,” You assure her, **I need to see something.**

Very gently Alphys reached out with her magic and _called_.

You answered.

Your soul hovered in the air in front of you, violet and black. You reached out to the side, but you didn’t look as you opened a window to The Void, instead you watched your soul. As you opened the window, the Violet of your soul grew brighter.

No.

The black of the cracks grew darker.

You closed the window and your soul went back to normal.

For a moment you considered what to do next, there was the obvious, safe, answer of having Alphys put your soul back and experimenting on your own.

Or the obviously dangerous choice.

You reached out and, more with your mind than your hand, you opened a window up a window to The Void inside your soul.

Reality lurched. The dark lines filling in your soul revealed themselves for what they really were.

Roots.

You didn’t hear Alphys’s worried cries, didn’t see Gaster’s frantic signing, couldn't see that your eyes become empty and black. You didn’t register any of this because a whole new knowledge opened up to you and consumed your conscious mind.

Once your potential for magic had lay in two directions. You would have been a healer so powerful that even after death there would be a chance for you to help if you were fast enough. Nothing would be able to outlast your Perseverance.

Alternatively you would have Become Death. It would only have taken a look, a thought, for you to kill hundreds, thousands. No one could escape you. No one could run because you would Find Them.

You changed all of that, through one simple action as a child. You had reached out with all of that potential, cried out for sanctuary, for a chance… and The Void reached back.

In that moment you lost your potential, and Became Potential. You were a human, a living being, but at the same time you were a nexus for The Void. If you reached just right you could cross not just between your world and The Void, but through the Void to another world, another reality. You could take the potential for what Could have been and make it what Was

But not time. Time was forbidden to you. You were Perserverance, Potential.

Time belonged to Pure Determination.

You could change what is now, but you could not change what had happened.

Distantly you were aware someone was shaking you, but there was so much more you needed to Know before you could let this knowledge go.

The Void was eager to lay out its rules to you, eager to be used, to use.

The biggest part what you could do with this was Trade. Take one Potential and exchange it for another. If you looked hard enough you would be able to _see_ the Potential in the world that you could Trade for.

You pulled back from The Void to experiment from this, to Look.

Sans was in front of you. His face was twisted with worry and terror. A very distant part of you was upset by this, wanted to comfort Sans and make him better.

That part of you was too far away, though.

Potential circled Sans like a tornado of rainbows, smears of different worlds, different decisions, different lives all at this exact moment.

You looked away from Sans to Gaster.

There was no Potential around Gaster. You Knew you could bring him back, but for Gaster it would take more than just the trade of a Life. You would have to sacrifice everything someone had done, trade everything, but the memory that they existed, to bring back Gaster from what had been done to him.

Sans was babbling at you, incoherent half sentences and words as he demanded You Stop. You Come Back. The distant part of your mind that was being suppressed by The Void demanded that you go to him, that you stop this before you Broke him. The You that was numb, balanced between the demanding voice and the voice of The Void, The You that was Filled with Knowledge observed the Potential for a moment longer, then, to test yourself, you traded a hedge from your backyard for a rose bush.

Sans froze.

Behind you rose an image, a mirage of the hedge that _Had Been_ and was replaced by the rose bush that _Was_.

Reluctantly you closed the window in your soul. You Knew what you were doing now and didn't need it to show you any longer... but it felt like stepping out from underneath an umbrella straight into the frantic rain.

“babe,” Sans breathed, watching the blackness fade from your eyes, turning them back to the color he loved so much, “holy shit babe, what did you do?” He grasped your shoulders ~~-~~ ~~Hugged you tightly - pushed you away - clung to you like you were dying -~~

Alphys looked just as distraught behind the skeleton, her claws clasped together ~~-~~ ~~Shaking you “What were you thinking?”~~ ~~-~~ and watched you silently.

You winced at the smears of potential still clouding your vision and closed your eyes, falling into Sans’s arms exhausted.

“A-are you okay, _____?” Alphys asked shakily, and you did your best to ignore the echoes of all the other questions she could have asked.

“No,” Your voice came out strangled, “Too… much.”

“don’t scare me like that, babe, stay with me.” Sans begged.

“S-sorry… blacking out it’s...una _void_ able.” The world fell to darkness as you felt Sans's arms go around you, almost uncomfortably tight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The punning and fainting on Sans is gonna become a thing I feel.  
> There's a lot of capitalization in this chapter. 99.9% was intentional  
> I'll give a prize of a spoiler/or a choice of One Shot to the first person who can tell me what Gaster assumed and was wrong about.


	11. Blackbird Fly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toriel was Queen of the Underground once, and kind she may be, a fool she is not.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Your responses, as always, warmed my heart guys <3  
> I'll keep the 'Gaster's Assumption' challenge going until either the relevant chapter appears or someone guesses it. It's kinda of a seemingly throwaway line in Chapter Five that Reader contradicted last chapter (Your hint for this chapter)  
> Shout Out to girlwithshinigamieyes who correctly guessed what P4A is up to long term and Ayarou who unintentionally guessed what P4A would be doing in this chapter.  
> Some of you make me feel really bad for the dark sad things I have planned for later, I swear

_“Momma, what is this? It hurts momma…”_

_“It’s only for a second, be good for momma, okay? Don’t you want to be good like your brother?”_

 

_“Why would you give up your real family for this?”_

 

_“We wanted to love you, you just made it so hard.”_

 

_~_

You weren’t sure what you registered first, Sans and Toriel’s conversation or the pounding in your head.

“Sans, please, I understand that you are upset but I would not ever allow harm to come to my child. I am confident it is safe to use magic on them.”

“tori, they passed out in my arms! again!”

“You saw their soul Sans, did it look sick?”

“no but-”

“Sans, I am being very patient with you my friend, but if you continue in your efforts to keep me from healing my child I will become upset.”

Very slowly you opened your eyes.

Judging by the ceiling, you were laying on your bed. You turned your head and saw Sans was bodily blocking your doorway to keep Toriel from entering. Considering Sans was about 4’11” and Toriel was closer to 7’, this was a very interesting exercise in futility. Looking at them caused your head to throb again and for a second you saw

~~Toriel HP- 440 ATK- 80/6/8 DEF- 80/1/-9999~~

~~Sans HP-1 ATK-1 DEF-1~~

Potential flicker around them, but it faded quickly, leaving you with only an idea of what you had seen.

“Nng.” You pressed the heel of your hand to your forehead and tried to make the pain disappear.

“My child!”

“_____!”

You weren’t sure if Sans gave up and let Toriel into the room, or if she pushed past, but both of them were at your bedside in a second, expressions concerned.

 **I’m okay,** You signed, but your body immediately betrayed you and you winced as the movement caused your head to throb again.

Toriel reached out and placed a paw on your head. Green magic surrounded you and you let out a sigh as your head immediately cleared and all the little aches and pains you hadn’t even consciously registered cleared up.

You relaxed and smiled as Toriel shot Sans a triumphant grin.

Sans elected to ignore your adoptive mother’s silent ‘I told you so’ and turned his attention to you.

“babe, you gave me a heart attack,” He told you seriously, “what were you doing?”

 **Alphys was teaching me how to use my magic since,** You winced slightly, realizing you’d never exactly gone over what Alphys had realized with anyone else, **Since she didn’t want me using it when I was sick again.**

Sans went still and Toriel started petting your hair, closing her eyes in anguish.

You chewed your lip guiltily at seeing that expression on her face.

“i didn’t… i didn’t know you could use magic?” Sans said and there was a wealth in that statement that Toriel wasn’t party too.

You slowly sat up, wary in case your head started pounding again, and pulled Toriel and Sans into a slightly awkward hug.

 **I’m okay, I didn’t know I was using magic,** You signed when they allowed you to pull away, mostly truthfully. You’d never really recognized what you were doing was magic, so it counted as not a lie, right? **I know better now, and I know what I’m doing… sort of, so it’s not a worry anymore.**

“what... what did you do?” Sans asked slowly, “i mean, other than the lightshow and turning a shrub into a rose bush?”

You had no good answer to that. Thanks to all the knowledge The Void had shoved into your head (Which was the most likely origin of your headache) you knew exactly what you could do and how… but you weren’t really sure how to coherently explain it.

 **I can… Trade things?** You offered slowly.

“what does that-”

“My child, would you like to spend the day with myself and Frisk?”

Both you and Sans gave Toriel a surprised look.

“tori, aren’t you curious about this?” Sans asked slowly.

 **Doesn’t Frisk have school?** You glanced at the clock on your nightstand, it wasn’t even noon, **Don’t you run a school?**

“They are doing some renovations at the school, so we let the children have a long weekend,” Toriel told you, “And I… have just been reminded that I have not spent as much time with my children as I would have liked.”

You glanced at Sans, slightly unsure. You really hadn’t gotten a chance to spend as much time with Toriel as you would have liked either, but Thursday's seemed like Sans Days.

“Of course Sans and Papyrus are invited,” Toriel assured you, “Frisk and I had planned to wander today, and I simply wondered if you would like to join us.”

You looked at Sans again, and it was clear that he was still confused at the sudden change of topic, and to be fair so were you, but he didn’t seem opposed.

“Thanks Mom,” You said softly.

Toriel smiled radiantly at you.

Papyrus and Frisk, it turned out, were in your living room assuring Alphys that you would be fine in their own unique way.

~~Alphys HP- 130 ATK- 8 DEF- 15~~

~~Papyrus HP- 680  ATK- 20 DEF- 20~~

~~Frisk/Chara HP- 20/99 ATK-10/48 DEF- 10/14~~

“WORRY NOT ALPHYS, YOU YOURSELF SAID THAT OUR HUMAN WAS NOT SICK!” Papyrus was saying as you walked out of your room, blinking at the rush of unnecessary information.

“I shouldn’t h-have let them do this without Sans.” Alphys had her face buried in her hands, “Wh-what if they’re broken and it’s all because I-I’m terrible at t-teaching magic?”

You shot forward and hugged the small yellow dinosaur before anyone could respond.

“Y-you did g-great Alphys!” You assured her, “It w-was not your fault at all! I d-did too much at once!”

Alphys looked up at you in relief, “You’re okay?”

 **Just a headache, Mom took care of it no problem.** You promised.

Alphys sagged in relief, “I w-was so worried! You d-didn’t have a f-fever, or any of the other s-symptoms of being sick b-but if I m-messed up…”

 **You’re the best Alphys, you did great!** You promised.

Alphys looked like she wanted to ask some more questions, but Toriel interrupted, “Alphys, I was going to take _____, Frisk, Sans, and Papyrus out for the day, did you want to join us? Or would you perhaps like to get Undyne when she’s done assisting… Asgore and join us at the Park later?”

Alphys blushed, “Ah, well, I… Undyne should be done soon, if you don’t mind we could meet you all at the park on Redwood? It’s r-really pretty and the Nice Cream Vendor hasn’t packed up for Winter yet…”

“That sounds like a wonderful idea.” Toriel told her happily.

Frisk reached over and tugged on Toriel’s dress slightly **Can we bring Flowey?** They signed hopefully.

Toriel looked concerned for a moment, but then nodded, “Of course my child, it will be a family day and Flowey is family.”

 **_Mom doesn’t know Flowey is Asriel._ ** _Frisk sighed,_ **_She doesn’t know about Chara either._ **

_“It’s better this way.” Chara told you sadly._

_“We died, we should stay in the past.” Flowey added bitterly._

You swallowed past the sudden lump in your throat and missed Alphys leaving, and Sans taking Frisk to grab Flowey.

~~Flowey/Asriel HP- 6000 ATK- 19 DEF- 0~~

You honestly weren’t sure what Toriel had meant by spending the day wandering, but it was pretty much what it sounded like.

You got to main street, where there were nothing but shops as far as you could see and you all wandered in and out of different shops as the fancy struck you. At one point Frisk drug everyone into a shop selling yarn and different fabrics and you saw one of their eyes turn red as they ran down an aisle to the yarn.

Toriel confided that Frisk spent a lot of time knitting at Embassy meetings, and offered to teach you when you admitted you’d played with it a little bit but never quite figured it out.

 **Did you teach Frisk?** You signed curiously.

“No, I…” Toriel frowned slightly and glanced to where Frisk went, “I did offer, but they had the oddest reaction to it. It’s one of the few times I’ve heard their voice. I suppose they must have known before they fell into the Underground.”

You looked over to where Frisk was looking intently between two colors of wool, and showing them to Flowey. You’d bet good money that if Frisk hadn’t known how to knit before they fell it had been Chara who taught them, if it wasn’t actually Chara doing all the knitting.

As you walked around, admiring the different types of cloth, it was hard not to notice Sans sticking close, his expression carefully relaxed.

 **If I promise to tell you if I get tired, will you have fun with me?** You asked hopefully.

Sans tilted his head, “will you talk with me about what happened later?”

You leaned forward and kissed him firmly, **Yes.**

“okay then, let’s have fun.” He reached past you and pulled out a bolt of cloth with shirtless men posing on it, “do you think i should try to make pajama pants out of this?”

You laughed and intertwined your fingers with his.

True to his word, Sans relaxed with you and you found yourself enjoying the day as you wound through Main Street.

A few stores later, Toriel laughed to herself, “Oh my, I’m so silly. I meant to buy some thread at the yarn store, I have some things that need hemming.”

 **We can go back.** Frisk signed.

“No, no, I’ll meet you all at the park, okay?” Toriel beamed at you, “It will only take a moment.”

“FRISK, I SHALL RACE YOU TO THE PARK!” Papyrus declared, taking off.

“No Frisk!” Flowey yelled as Frisk took off, “Don’t run! You’ll drop me!”

Sans chuckled and held a hand out to you, but you glanced at Toriel questioningly.

“Go ahead my child, I’ll be right there.” Toriel assured you.

You grinned at her, took Sans’s hand and followed after your younger siblings.

Toriel watched you go with a fond smile, then stepped into a shadow of the store and waited.

A few humans passed before she found what she was looking for. A man and a woman that had been following all of you pretty much since the moment your group had stepped foot on main street.

Toriel waited until they had passed her, before stepping out of the store and walking up behind them.

“Hello, I am Toriel.” She said in a congenial voice.

They froze, their posture screaming ‘Caught’.

“I could not help but notice that you were following us today,” Toriel continued as though they were discussing the weather, “Would you care to share why?”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about.” The man averted his eyes.

“Can’t a couple walk down Main Street without being accosted?” The woman grumbled.

“I see,” Toriel smiled kindly at them, “If that is the case I have only one small warning for you.”

The man’s eyes flickered back to her, but the woman’s face deepened into a dark scowl.

“I do not know how much you know of me, I was the Queen of Monster’s once.” Toriel’s smile didn’t change, but her voice dropped slightly, “I lost two children as Queen, and when I was not Queen I lost six more. If you, or whoever you are working for have plans to harm either of my children I will utterly destroy you and everyone who even considered being involved.” Six balls of fire flickered into existence over Toriel’s shoulders for a moment, then disappeared as she covered her mouth and giggled, “Excuse me, I lose my temper sometimes. Have a wonderful day!” Toriel walked away and neither of the humans made a move to follow her.

“Bosses aren’t going to be happy about this.” The man sighed, “Both those traitors seem close with the skeletons.”

“ _He_ won’t be happy either.” The woman grumbled, “You know how he feels about the skeletons, and we got caught! If it were the fish woman, that would be one thing, but the ex-queen? That’s just embarrassing. He trained us better.”

“Come on, let’s go.” The man turned aside.

Ahead, Toriel pursed her lips slightly as she considered what she’d heard.

 **Mom!** Frisk signed excitedly from a tree branch when she caught up with her family, **Papyrus beat me here, but Sans and Big Sib beat both of us!**

“i knew a shortcut.” Sans drawled from in the sandbox where you were making a decent go at covering him in sand, “but i was sure ______ was already tired cause they have been running through my mind all day.” He winked outrageously at you.

“SANS HAS BEEN MAKING UNFORGIVABLE PUNS, AND SO OUR HUMAN HAS SWORN TO STOP HIM.” Papyrus reported.

You looked up with a mock solemn expression **I’m burying him in the** **_sans._ **

Papyrus let out a loud cry of disbelief and placed a hand on his chest, “I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU TWO WOULD… _BURY-TRAY_ ME LIKE THIS.”

“nice one bro.” Sans grinned and you gave Papyrus a thumbs up.

“Nyeheheh.” Papyrus grinned and then Frisk grabbed his attention and they began playing in the swings, carefully placing a protesting Flowey’s pot in a swing meant for a small baby or a toddler.

Toriel smiled at you all and waved down Undyne and Alphys when she spotted them.

~~Undyne HP- 1500 ATK- 50 DEF- 20~~

You grimaced as more stats accompanied the arrival of another of your friends and shook your head. Something else was niggling at you, and you watched Toriel for a moment until you realized what it was. She hadn’t brought a bag with her from the fabric store.

“hey babe, are you going to keep burying me?” Sans asked curiously as you continued to pile sand on him absently.

 **I have to, I’m a pirate.** You turned your attention back to him and affixed a solemn expression.

Sans raised a brow bone at you.

 **I have to bury my treasure.** You blushed a bit as you signed, but it was definitely worth it for the stunned look on his face, and the blue that crept across his cheekbones.

 **You’re adorable.** You added with a smile.

“i am, am i?” Sans grinned challengingly at you and teleported out from under the sand, “i think you under _sand_ why i can’t let this challenge go.”

You raised an eyebrow at him and were caught completely unaware when he scooped you up and started making his way towards the playground.

**What are you doing?**

“i can’t let your insolence _slide_ ,” He nodded to your destination.

You grinned and held onto Sans as he teleported the both of you to the top of the slide, and cuddled into him as you slid down.

 **That was a real** **_let down_** **.** You teased.

Sans grinned and nuzzled you, “i love you so much.”

“Hey Nerds! We’re in a park where children could be watching!” Undyne called over to you.

Sans turned blue and you felt heat rush to your cheeks, but it was worth it. The sun was shining, the birds were singing their farewells to the summer, and the flower was yelling obscenities from a baby swing.

You couldn’t imagine how a day could be more perfect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey you guys remember the guy with grey eyes who tried to hit Papyrus with a rock? Wonder if he'll come back at any point... hmm...  
> Also, This is probably obvious by now, but flashbacks from the beginning are not just from the alternate timeline.


	12. I'm meaner than my demons

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Sans talk.  
> You discover exactly how dangerous Trading can be...  
> for others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> High Five to Moss_Flowers for winning the Gaster's Assumption Challenge!  
> What was Gaster's assumption?  
> In chapter five Gaster stated he was relieved Read did not remember how you got to The Void (He knows well how traumatic that can be)  
> However! When Reader received their powers, they state that they remembered how they got into The Void (And what's more they did it on purpose)  
> (Huge Shout Out HelenBFire who didn't guess correctly, but made a heartrendingly sweet guess. They get a prize for breaking my heart a bit. And again making me feel awful for what I'm gonna do to you guys in a few chapters)  
> Remember you can get a heads up on chapter posts, Chapter title information, ask me questions directly, and even get bits of important information on my tumblr sincidentsans.tumblr.com

_“these guys are in for a bad time.”_

_“Sans, no!”_

 

_“This isn’t fair. I looked for so long, it can’t end like this.”_

 

**_We’ve won! They gave in!_ **

 

_~_

 

Sans watched you. You watched Sans. Both of you were hesitant to break the peace of the day, but it had to be done.

“what was that?” Sans asked softly, “what were you doing when you used your magic?”

 **I opened a window to The Void in my own soul.** You signed slowly.

From behind Sans, Gaster was watching you with an expression of mild disapproval, his opinion of your rash actions obvious.

“why would you do that?” Sans was obviously trying to understand before he reacted.

 **It felt…** You bit your lip, trying to remember exactly what had driven you to open your soul up to The Void, **It felt like the right thing to do. Like I was supposed to do it.**

“you scared me, a lot.” Sans told you bluntly, “i would appreciate it if you never did something like that again.”

 **I can’t say never,** You were prepared for him to be upset, but the flicker of blue in his eyes was unexpected. You didn’t see him move, one second he was sitting on the chair to the right of your couch, and the next he was in front of you, hands on either side of you and his left eye was flickering blue and yellow.

“i lost you once,” Sans’s voice was ragged, “and it nearly destroyed me. please, please don’t do that again.”

You leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his forehead, **Sans, I’m sorry. I know it scared you, but I can’t promise I won’t do everything in my power to protect you, all of you, if you’re threatened. The Void won’t…** You hesitated, unwilling to lie to him, **It won’t** **_hurt_ ** **me, it just makes things numb if I access it to a greater extent.**

Sans rested his forehead against yours, “i can’t lose you again.” He told you again, “it’ll break me. i can’t.”

“I love you.” You told him firmly, “I love you.”

Sans sighed and closed his eyes. “i love you, too. don’t do anything risky.”

You smiled at him, but didn’t say anything because you would risk everything to protect him.

Behind Sans Gaster caught your attention, **Please listen to Sans, Little One. The Void is hungry and there is a price for everything.**

Your smile faded, reminded of the lack of Potential that surrounded not only Gaster, but Flowey and even Frisk to an extent. There was a price on attempting to alter the Potential surrounding any of them.

But, under the right circumstances, it was a price you were willing to pay.

You went back to work Friday, and it was a huge relief to be doing things again. You felt a little guilty at the bags under David’s eyes, but he greeted you exuberantly and let you know how much you had been missed. Even Emma smiled tentatively at you as you grabbed your cart of returns and made your way around the library.

Halfway through the cart you realized that something felt distinctly off about the library. You poked your head out from behind the shelf you were working and looked around.

The library was almost totally empty. Emma was behind the main desk, dozing off and the door to David’s office was closed.

There were no monsters in sight.

Curious, you pulled your phone out and checked your messages.

_Sans: major stuff going down at the embassy for a few weeks babe, i’ll pop by the library at six and walk you home and to undyne’s_

_Undyne: Hey Nerd! Stick to the library for a while, okay? We’ve got a lot going on and we trust your boss will be able to keep you safe while you’re in the building! So stay safe Nerd, or else! We’ll see you at our place tonight for ANIME!_

_Toriel: Hello my child, This is Toriel. There have been some major breakthroughs with the human government, please stay safe while we cannot get away for long!_

Ah, well that explained a bit. You felt a little… odd being without your friends for the first time in months, but you were an adult and you could be at work without supervision.

The day passed slowly, you finished off the returns, went to book repair, and even got started on what books had been too damaged and needed to be re-ordered.

“Hey, _____, Can I talk to you for a bit?” David called you into his office around four.

You poked your head in, eyebrow raising in a silent question.

“I’ve got some great news!” David beamed, “We got a grant to order a bunch of new books! I was hoping tomorrow, since it looks like you got so much done today, that you’d go through some of the catalogues of books we have an choose a few you think might be popular? I’d do it, but no surprise, this grant came with a ton of paperwork.”

“S-sure David! Sounds g-great!” You smiled at him.

“Awesome! Hey, I don’t want you to push yourself too much, and it’s been slow today. Why don’t you go home a little early?” David’s expression turned mildly worried.

You frowned at him.

“You can work a full shift Monday, I promise!” David assured you, “But, well, we really appreciate what you do here and we missed you while you were gone. It would be awful if you overworked yourself and had to leave again.”

You chewed your lip for a second, then nodded slowly, “J-just today though.”

“Just today.” David agreed.

You nodded, your thoughts on what sort of books would be more popular in the library and what subjects the library was lacking in.

You forgot to text Sans you were getting off early.

You walked home with a bounce in your step, and your head in the clouds. You didn’t see the hit coming until you were sprawled on the dirty ground in an alleyway.

“Well, well, well,” A group of five sneering men surrounded you, “If it isn’t a little traitor out and about all on their own.”

A shudder ran down your back and you climbed to your feet.

“You don’t have any friends to protect you here,” Another man smirked at you, “So we’re going to teach you exactly what happens when you betray your own race for a bunch of monsters.”

You glared at them and tried to dodge a kick aimed at your knees, but only managed to end up surrounded on all sides and back on the ground.

You scowled up at them and someone behind you kicked you in the ribs, hard.

You lost your temper and reality shifted, allowing you to perceive the smears of Potential around your attackers.

The next person to aim a kick at you was surprised when one second he was aiming at you on the ground, and the next you were standing in the circle and one of his friends was on the receiving end of his kick. On the alley wall behind you lit up an image of you and the man you’d replaced.

Trading yourself for one of your assailants was actually a lot more draining than trading the hedge for the Rosebush had been yesterday, and made you dizzy as well. You leaned against the alley wall, glaring darkly at them

“You little piece of shit!” The man who got kicked swore.

“T-takes a b-bunch of assholes to attack s-someone alone.” You snarled at them, sifting through the smears of potential for ways to defend yourself. For just a moment you considered one potential longer than others, but discarded it when you realized you didn’t have the price to pay.

“We’ll show you an asshole.” The first man stepped forward menacingly, you tensed, already reaching for one Potential... and his cellphone went off.

The sound was so surprising in this tense situation that you froze and the smears of Potential faded away.

The man shot you a hesitant glance and pulled his cellphone out.

“Hello? Yeah we’re just- No we were teaching a little traitor… Yeah I know there are standing orders to… Come on Boss when are we…” The man turned a disgusted look on you, “Yeah okay, fine. We’ll deal with them later.” He hung up his phone and glanced at the others, “Come on, big boss doesn’t want us messing up their pretty little face today.”

You were left completely flabbergasted as the five men intent on beating you to a pulp a second before, just turned and walked away.

You... honestly had no idea how to react to that.

Your walk home was considerably slower, hindered by the aching in your ribs from the one hit they’d gotten in, and thinking about what you’d seen in the Potential around the men.

You had Traded places with one of the men, and it honestly made you feel a little sick. It had been a half step through The Void into the man’s Potential and forcing him to accept your own potential for the attack. It felt dirty, wrong, and you would definitely not be trying that again anytime soon. It had been the other Smears of potential that had worried you, though. In the moment before the first man’s cell phone rang, you had nearly traded his inner organs for dust.

You felt your stomach surge in protest at the thought.

You weren’t violent, you weren’t, you wanted to protect your friends, to help people.

And you’d almost hurt someone a lot.

_You would have become a healer…_

_You would have become Death…_

Suddenly you wanted nothing more than to curl up under your favorite blanket and go to sleep. You slowly walked into your house, and after a moment’s deliberation you made your way to the bathroom to see how bad your ribs looked.

Very carefully you hiked your shirt up and peered into the mirror.

You were already turning black and blue, but some tentative poking made you pretty sure nothing was broken. You met your eyes in the mirror and considered.

You could call Toriel, let her heal you, and without a doubt your friends would never let you out of your sight again. No one knew how Sans would react to the idea that, again, you’d been attacked for accepting monsters.

Well, no, you were pretty sure you had an idea how Sans would react.

You let your shirt fall and took a steadying breath, then reached for your phone.

_You: Sans, I just got home, David let me off early after giving me good news, and I was so distracted I forgot to text you, I’m so sorry. Made it home just fine, I’ll see you at Alphys and Undyne’s, love you!_

You felt a momentary flash of guilt before you sent the message, but quashed it. Your friends were doing good work, important work, and this was why you’d wanted to learn magic. To defend yourself, so they wouldn't have to. You could handle yourself and…

_“...big boss doesn’t want us messing up their pretty little face today.”_

Well, if something bigger happened you’d do what you had to do.

Better that these people were focusing on you, anyway, rather than your friends. You left the bathroom and went to make some tea to settle your stomach, you were still a little bit queasy at the thought of Trading someone’s organs for Dust.

You left your tea on the counter to cool as you switched into your Pajamas and grabbed a few spare blankets. After a moment’s consideration you grabbed several more and opened up a window to The Void and stored them.

You turned away from the open window and found yourself nose to nose (well, nose to chest) with Gaster.

 **You should tell Sans what happened.** Gaster signed at you with a solemn look.

_For one second you consider one Potential longer than the others. The Void whispers to you. None of these men had done anything of worth, it would take a sacrifice greater than all of them had to offer to bring Gaster back._

**Sans doesn’t need to worry.** You signed back, double the guilt piling on you. What would it take to bring Gaster back? You couldn’t trade someone’s organs for dust, but could trade a group of people’s existence for a friend? A father figure?

If five people wasn’t enough to match Gaster’s Potential how many would it take? You couldn’t sacrifice innocent people… but…

Maybe if you could convince more of the guys from tonight to attack you? Be enough trouble to justify the cost of the fight? If you got enough racist jerks together, could you somehow match Gaster’s potential?

Even more guilt piled on you. You were considering sacrificing tons of people's lives

 ~~_Just one person,_ ~~ _The Void Whispers,_ ~~_One person with enough potential will do._ ~~

to bring Gaster out of The Void.

 **He deserves to know you're in danger.** Gaster argued.

You looked down at the floor, but you find that all you can think of is the heartbroken, longing look on Sans’s face when you say you can see his dad. You can see his Dad, but he can’t. You think of the sad smile Gaster wears raising you. You think of the momentary pause Papyrus does every time someone mentions fathers, like he’s confused by the concept.

Could you Trade a few bad lives, the lives of people who have hurt others and would continue to do so, for the life of one monster who would make two of the monsters closest to your heart Happy? For the chance to see Gaster really smile when he gets to hold his sons?

 **I’m not in any danger, trust me.** You smiled at Gaster, **I know what I’m doing.**

 **Do you little one?** Gaster flickered in front of you, **If you die, how many lives will shatter in response?**

You shook your head, the smile unfading.

You wouldn’t die, you would weigh the potential of the lives lost against the potential of the life to be saved.

Your phone went off on the counter, and you stepped past Gaster to grab it.

 _Sans: i wish you’d texted me, i think i had a heart attack for a second, but i’m glad you made it home safe. i guess i_ anime _see you tonight_

_You: That was an awful pun and i love you for it._

_Sans: ;)_

_You: Can you talk about this exciting new thing the embassy is working on?_

_Sans: it’s surprise, but i will say some big shot scientist apparently started doing some research into monster biology and stuff and put some pressure on the government to work with us on some important stuff._

_You: Good! They need to work with you more often._

_Sans: no arguments from me babe, see you in an hour and a half_

_You: I’ll be there_

You set your phone down, drank your tea, and glanced at Gaster, who was still frowning. He didn’t understand right now, but he would.

Despite your certainty, you felt your sins crawling on your back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm gonna let you in on a secret, In the very first draft Reader absolutely did not even consider the idea of trading someone for Gaster at this point. In Draft two, they did trade someone for Gaster at this point, but that got scrapped because I needed to weigh the cost.  
> So Reader's Trade Powers have an equivalent exchange.  
> And when Reader Traded themselves with someone else this chapter, something got lost.  
> And that something is a something all eight of the beings that remember the future are going to have to deal with.


	13. Please Stop, You're Scaring Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You make a mistake and Flowey points something out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, here's one of those chapters that I was not looking forward to. Gotta be careful playing with magic, kids.  
> Thank you, again, for your comments and kudos guys, it gives me the drive to keep rewriting drafts and editing!  
> (Also, can I say I got a couple of eerie comments a few chapters ago where I couldn't help but wonder if someone had a direct line to my brain? Cause there was definite plot guesses there. I almost responded to the comments, but I don't want to give too much away)  
> What's going to happen when All Six of the beings from Timeline A stop to process what's happening? The Six of them definitely have some thoughts to think and things to say

_“Ryan, does it always hurt?”_

_“Nah, it goes numb after a while.”_

 

**_Wish on a star with me, sib?_ **

**_I don’t really wish on Stars anymore, Frisky Business._ **

 

_“i’m glad you came.”_

 

_~_

Friday, when you got to Anime Night, you found your friends practically vibrating with excitement from whatever work they were doing at the embassy. Any attempt on your part to get information was met with evasion and misdirection. It was Sans who finally gave you a clue as to why.

“we’re keeping things close to our chests cause it’s a thing that’s gonna be pretty exciting for you, too.” He told you quietly during a filler episode of Mew Mew Kissy Cutie, “i- i mean we, kind of want it to be your christmas present. it’ll be pretty much set by then and… i mean, it’s gonna be pretty great babe. you’ll be super excited.”

You considered, then grinned down at him, a plan forming, **If you think it’s important, then focus on that and don’t worry about guarding me! Just… maybe come by and visit me after work? I’ll miss you guys a lot…**

Sans seemed surprised, “babe, i plan on walking you home everyday.”

You shook your head, **Everyone else gets off at six right? Don’t rush over to me, take a little time with Papyrus, too. Come by my house at seven on work days, and we’ll have some date time.**

Sans seemed conflicted, “i don’t… what if you get hurt?”

 **This is your chance to admit the truth.** Gaster urged from the corner of your vision.

You kissed Sans, then grinned disarmingly, **I’m just a librarian right now, Sans. Who would want to harm me?**

Sans seemed a little unsure, “... for a few days, but if anything happens call me immediately.”

You smiled reassuringly and kissed Sans.

But you didn’t promise, and he took your kiss as a response.

After a weekend that was slightly tenser than normal due to Gaster urging you, almost constantly, to tell Sans, or hell anyone, about the guys that had attacked you.

You almost did, a few times, but…

Sans was so eager about whatever he was working on at the embassy, hoping it would be a good Christmas present for you.

Wouldn't it make an equally nice present to wipe out a group of people who hated him and everyone he loved, and give him his dad back in return?

So Monday after work you waved a cheerful goodbye to David, tucked your bookbag and lunch box into the void, and went looking for a fight.

If you thought it would be difficult to get in a fight with an international racist terrorist group, you were in for a surprise.

Whatever orders the men who had attacked you previously had been given, they apparently didn’t apply when you hunted them down, punched them in the face, and called them “Racist assholes.”

You learned several things in that encounter.

First- Undyne was a lot harder to dodge than three adult men.

Second- Three men whose greatest accomplishment was joining a group of racists, were definitely not enough to bring Gaster back, not that you were expecting them to be when the five men who attacked you previously hadn’t been.

Third- Trading yourself with other people was a bad idea, however trading the bruises they gave you for their lack of bruises was not only possible but encouraged since it left no proof that you had been fighting at all.

At six forty-five you ran home and hopped in the shower, and managed to get in pajamas and look like nothing out of the ordinary had happened when Sans knocked at your door at exactly seven.

When you sought them out again Tuesday, there were six men and a woman.

It still wasn’t enough.

Wednesday there were eleven people. It still wasn’t enough and you were more than a little frustrated.

How much potential did it take to bring Gaster back? How many people who had done next to nothing with their lives equalled a monster scientist with two sons who had created a power generator that had powered the Underground for ages, and had been powerful enough to plant bits of The Void into your shattering soul and bring you across the veil between The Void and the real world?

…

You were gonna need to piss a lot of people off.

To your surprise, Thursday you woke up to find Sans waiting for you.

 **I thought you’d have to work with this embassy thing being so big.** You signed putting tea in mugs as the kettle heated up behind you.

“i, uh, asked them to move anything that i might need to be involved in over to tomorrow.” Sans admitted, “we’ve been spending time together but… ya know. i missed you and, uh, thursdays are our days.”

Your chest tightened and for the first time in several days you felt guilt for going out and picking fights, putting yourself in danger when Sans was always so worried about the future repeating itself.

You distracted yourself by pouring hot water in the mugs and then turned a bright smile on Sans, “Y-you’re a real swee _-tea_!”

Sans smirked, “yeah? well you’re _brew-tea_ -ful.”

You handed him a mug, “You’re filled with c-creativi-tea.”

“i’m just glad my puns don’t _mug_ you.” Sans glanced down into the tea.

“I love you.” You told him sincerely.

“i love you, too. Be _leaf_ it.”

You smiled and the guilt disappeared easily under hot tea and terrible jokes.

You were doing this for him.

Friday you were three times as determined to find the people you needed to Trade for Gaster.

Until Frisk walked into the library at three fifty.

You were in the middle of looking at another book catalog when your little sibling crashed into you.

 **Sib! I got kicked out of the embassy meetings cause they’re talking about adult stuff!** Frisk pouted as they signed, **Like I’m not old enough to talk about adult stuff! I’m the ambassador!**

Inwardly you were frozen. Frisk couldn’t be here, you were going to get attacked after work. You had been excited this morning because you had _seen_ the people gathering around the library, trying to be subtle… but you couldn’t risk Frisk.

 **That’s… that’s unfair Frisky Business,** You cracked a brittle smile, **Is mom coming to get you at five?**

Oh no. What if they ignored you altogether and attacked _Toriel_ ? Worse what if they attacked Toriel _and_ Frisk before you were even off?

 **No** , Frisk pulled off their backpack and to your ever increasing horror pulled out Flowey, who looked less than pleased to have been stuck in a backpack, and placed him on your desk, **I’m supposed to walk with you to Undyne and Alphys’s house for Anime night.**

Oh no. Oh no. How were you going to get Frisk and Flowey home safely? When you’d glanced out at lunch there had easily been fifteen people lingering around the library.

 **You okay sib?** Frisk noticed the look on your face.

Flowey was looking at you oddly, too.

“Oh. You _idiot_.” Flowey said suddenly, face twisting, “How the hell did you manage that?”

You looked down at Flowey without comprehension.

Flowey stared at you in disbelief, “How did you just _lose_ your conscience.”

What?

**What?**

Flowey sneered, “Really? You didn’t think the _Soulless_ flower wouldn’t notice you _missing_ a part of your Soul? I’m surprised the smiley trashbag hasn’t seen it yet.”

“What do you mean, Azzy?” Chara suddenly entered the conversation.

Flowey looked at the two (three) of you like you’d lost your mind.

“There’s a chunk missing out of their soul.” Flowey said slowly, like you simply hadn’t heard him, “Their conscious is just gone.”

_Trading yourself for one of your assailants was actually a lot more draining… and made you dizzy…_

Huh. That certainly explained why you were growing more and more used to the idea of sacrificing upwards of eleven people to pull Gaster out of The Void.

You felt a tug and suddenly your soul was floating in front of you. Sure enough there was a small piece missing right from the center. Actually… the missing piece looking kinda like…

 **Is that Papyrus?** Frisk signed, peering at your soul.

No, it was not. It was similar in appearance though. Apparently your conscious looked a lot like Gaster when it was ripped out of your soul.

“H-how do I get that back?” You whispered.

“I don’t know, how’d you lose it?” Flowey raised an eyebrow at you.

“Hey, is everything okay over here?” David wandered over, “Hey kiddo, you bring flowers for…” David stared at Flowey. Flowey stared at David. David looked at your soul, then you, then Flowey.

David sighed.

“I don’t… I don’t even…” David gave you a look, “Are you having a fight with a flower in the library.”

 **Put it back Flowey,** You signed quickly, “N-no David, S-sorry. Frisk and I were j-just talking soul s-stuff and Flowey demonstrated... a thing.” Your soul returned to its proper place.

“Flowey. Flowey the Flower.” David said slowly.

“You wanna fight?” Flowey demanded.

 **Flowey No.** Frisk signed.

“I’m… I’m gonna go back to my office.” David sighed, “Get those forms from the catalogues to me by the end of the day, okay? I’m going to put the orders in tomorrow.”

“S-sure thing.” You nodded jerkily.

“So really, how the hell did you break your soul without shattering it?” Flowey asked.

 **Language** , Frisk chided, but looked at you curiously.

 **I don’t know, but I’ll find out.** You bit your lip, **Could you… poke me if I start looking scary?**

“Don’t do anything to hurt yourself.” Chara warned.

 **I’ll be safe.** _I think_.

Frisk nodded their agreement and you took a deep breath and closed your eyes.

And touched The Void, seeking answers.

 

~~_You Traded. Always a price. Your conscious for his moment in time._ ~~

You needed to know how to get it back.

~~_You must lose more than you gain._ ~~

What was worth your conscious? Was that Quantifiable?

~~_You traded your pain for others lack of. The Pain You Traded for Your Conscious. The Man Will Remember._ ~~

You needed your conscious. Were you, you without it?

~~_We Hunger._ ~~

You were pretty sure that last comment was not actually meant for you, so you disregarded it and reached into The Void, Through The Void and sought to Trade.

 

Self disgust. Guilt. Empathy. How many people had you hurt? How many people had you been willing to hurt? You’d lied to Sans, and told yourself it was for his own good. You lied to Sans and sought to make his worst fears come true.

Pain. Aches. You could practically feel the bruises spreading across your skin, and were grateful under the sick feelings that you’d worn a long sleeved short and had managed to avoid being hit in the face.

A featherlight touch brushed across your shoulder.

You opened your eyes and peered up at two red eyes.

“You scared Frisk.” Chara said flatly, “Bad.”

Even more guilt and self loathing surged through you.

“I told your boss you’re sick. We’re going home and we’re going to talk about what you’ve been doing.” Chara told you.

“I didn’t even know you could fight.” Flowey said in awe.

You looked down at the yellow flower, who was standing straight up and watching you, “In both lives you seemed like an even bigger pacifist than Frisk! But we just saw you _attack_ people and turn their attacks back on them!”

Oh. Your soul projected images of your Trades.

 **How many saw?** You winced as every new ache made it hard to sign.

“Just us. We hid it.” Chara told you, “You’ve worried Frisk, and you’ve been lying, Sib.” The way Chara spoke the endearment _hurt_ and you closed your eyes and lowered your head in guilt.

“Let’s go.”

Stiffly you rose, unable to deny the ghost child inhabiting Frisk and offered David a broken smile as you handed him the, thankfully finished, catalog forms.

"Everything okay?" David asked gently, "Frisk said you weren't feeling good."

Your eyes dropped to your feet, "M'not." You admitted honestly.

"Don't be afraid to call in Monday if you need to, okay?" David encouraged you, "Don't work yourself into the hospital again."

You nodded and walked out the doors with your eyes glued to your feet. Chara held Flowey in one arm, and your hand with their free hand, their face pointed straight ahead.

“Well, well, well.”

Shit. You’d forgotten the initial reason for your panic.

“We come to take care of one traitorous trouble maker, and get another traitor and a little demon for free.”

There were more than twenty people surrounding the two of you. You were far enough from the library there would be no help coming from that directions, and you were almost certain that this crowd would have taken care that they would get caught by pedestrians.

Your hand tightened around Chara’s. You’d messed up. You were hurt, you felt awful, and you didn’t have the will to even consider trading all of these people for anyone, even Gaster.

But you wouldn't let them hurt Chara and Frisk, or Flowey.

You considered your options. Flowey you could, maybe, store in The Void, but Chara in Frisk’s body would be in danger, and Frisk’s soul would be on the line too.

“We’re about to pay you back all the pain you've given us this past week, plus some since it seems we’re feeling pretty good. Not even the Big Boss can call us off this time, you pushed too hard.”

If you made it out of here alive, you were going to be in the worst trouble. You were surrounded, and they were moving in.

You needed a way out. You needed time to think.

Time.

The Void.

You remembered a passing fragment from when you'd first opened yourself to The Void.

You glanced down at Chara, “D-do you still trust me?”

Chara looked at you blankly, “We’re very upset with you, but we trust you.” One of their eyes was bleeding brown again.

“No tricks, kids.” The man warned, stepping meaningfully towards you.

It was an idea, a gamble, a flicker of a possibility.

“F-focus really hard on my living room.” You warned Chara and Frisk, then scooped them up, Flowey secure between your body and theirs, ripped a window to The Void open and ran through.

The Void was pulling you, relentless, starving, it wanted everything, it wanted Frisk, and Chara, and Flowey.

The Void was a part of you though, and here you were more free than anywhere else in the world. Here you Knew the answer to the questions you had.

You wrapped your soul around Chara, Frisk, and Flowey, protecting them from the grasping darkness of The Void. From the still open window you saw the faces of the men who had been, moments before, prepared to hurt you, maybe kill you.

You shut the Window.

“Frisk, Chara,” The Void gnawed at your soul, “Focus, please.”

Frisk’s eyes were brown again, and they reached out and Opened A Window.

The three (four) of you tumbled onto your couch, and it only took a moment to close the window above you.

“What. Was. That?” Flowey demanded.

You kept your eyes closed, your soul returning to it’s natural shape and adding to the aches you were feeling.

“That was Determination in The Void.” You whispered. “Perseverance g-gives you the Ability to t-trade through Space. Determination gives you the ability to Move through t-time and space.”

“Okay.” Flowey accepted, “So. You just thrust us into the endless hungering darkness on the off chance Frisk and Chara didn't die and could pull us out?”

You opened one eye to look at the flower.

“Kn-new we’d be fine.”

“How?”

 **Sib,** Frisk slowly sat up, pulling you with them, **You've got a lot of questions to answer.**

 **I know.** You turned to the corner where Gaster was watching you with the same mournful expression he’d worn all week. **And a lot of apologies to make.**

You’d really messed up this time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Woowee.  
> So, reader now has an angry mob after them, put themselves in danger, ignored Gaster, and lied to Sans.  
> A lot.  
> This chapter technically takes place over the week before Thanksgiving in the story, so here's hoping Reader is excited for a family get together after all this drama.  
> Because nothing dramatic happens during Thanksgiving guys.  
> Probably.  
> And I mean, I'm sure Chara, Frisk, and Flowey will wait until After the Holiday for their answers and awkward confrontations, right?


	14. What hurts the most

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everyone is making rash decisions. Thanksgiving does not happen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good news! Early chapter!  
> Bad News, Short Chapter.  
> You're gonna want to fasten your seat belts, because this chapter literally got away from me. It ended 100% different from how I wrote it...  
> Thanks so much for your comments and kudos guys, I really can't say how much they mean to me, and now I'm repaying your kindness with this evil I'm so sorry.  
> What's worse is that It's a short chapter >

**_I don’t even know how to fight?_ **

 

_“Don’t fight this, please?”_

 

_“I wish we could get a second chance…”_

 

_~_

You started from the beginning. How you’d seen five men and Traded yourself for one of them, and how that set this whole mess on its tracks. Even though you were ashamed of what you had done, you still explained your reasoning, that you’d hoped to provoke enough people that you could Trade them for Gaster. You didn’t look up as you talked, unable to bring yourself to meet the gaze of your little siblings, the soulless flower, or Gaster.

 **Then I traded all of the pain I’d avoided for my conscience back.** You finished slowly, **And the rest you know.**

You clasped your hand in your lap and silently waited.

“Well,” Chara sighed, “In terms of bad ideas with good intentions, I guess I’m not really in any state to judge.”

You peered up with a frown.

“Poisoned myself to try and free my adoptive race, remember?” Chara pointed out reasonably.

“You shouldn’t have traded your conscience back, you were a lot more badass without it.” Flowey decided.

 **It was dark** , You signed with a shake of your head, **I haven’t been me since I lost it.**

Flowey looked a little struck, and turned his petaled face away, “Whatever.” He grumbled.

With a deep breath you looked at Frisk and waited.

 **I don’t want to do another Reset again.** Frisk signed.

You felt awful, **Don’t Frisk. Don’t ever Reset again, don’t do that to yourself. Not for me.**

**I would miss you very much if you died. I did miss you when you died. I felt like I could never be happy again.**

You pulled Frisk into a tight hug.

“It d-doesn’t last forever. If I d-die again, promise you won’t Reset? You h-hurt when you Reset, I c-can see it. You lose everything.”

“We find it again.” Chara whispered.

“Not the same.” You shook your head, “Don’t Reset, not for me.”

Frisk and Chara held tight to you.

“You need to tell Sans.” Chara murmured.

“I know.”

"Tonight."

"I will." You offered them a half smile when you pulled away.

You didn’t want to tell Sans. As you, Frisk, and Flowey walked to Undyne and Alphys’s house you made up a hundred and one different ways to start the conversation, and scrapped every one of them.

“‘Sup Punks!” Undyne burst out the door and grabbed you, hefting you into the air, “It feels like I haven’t seen you in months!”

You bit your tongue to keep from crying out as Undyne’s crushing hug pressed against a ton of your new bruises.

“M-missed y-you, t-too.” You managed to say, more or less normally.

Thankfully Undyne was too excited to notice.

“You’re gonna be so excited when we’re done Nerd. Sorry your mom says you’re too young to be involved in discussions right now, Frisk, but she’s kinda right. The sort if stuff we're talking right now is for us older punks!”

“hey,” Sans leaned in the doorway and gave you an oddly strained grin, “how was work?”

 **_Library_** **-ting.** You signed with a smile that you hoped looked more natural than it felt. Sans chuckled and shoved his hands in his pockets, heading back inside. You frowned slightly, he hadn’t even attempted to reprocate the pun.

“Don’t mind Sans.” Undyne assured you, “He’s been in a mood since lunch, I think he got the b-b-b-bad ketchup.” Undyne nearly choked mid sentence and you looked at her in alarm.

 **The bad ketchup?** You signed, worried about a ketchup so bad it necessitated ‘The’ in its title.

“I meant… Bad ketchup… at lunch… uh, nothing to do with anything we’ve been working on aND ITS TIME TO WATCH ANIME SO LET’S STOP TALKING ABOUT THIS IMMEDIATELY!” Undyne tucked Frisk and Flowey under one arm and sprinted into the front room.

You stared after her, nonplussed, and then very slowly followed her into the house, closing the door behind you.

"FRIENDS!" Papayrus greeted excitedly, "YOU HAVE ARRIVED AT LAST! UNDYNE HAS LAID A BOUNTIFUL FEAST OF UNHEALTHY SNACKS AND ALPHYS HAS PREPARED OUR LATEST ANIMATED ADVENTURE."

Frisk clapped excitedly and Flowey grumbled that he was only just getting caught up after being excluded from anime night for  _reasons_ with a pointed glance at you.

Halfway through Mew Mew, you could feel Frisk’s meaningful eyes on you like a physical weight. Your hands were clenched around the bottom of your pajama shirt so tightly you were on the verge of ripping it.

Sans wasn’t watching the episode, he was looking off into space and frowning.

“Sans?” You said softly.

“hm?” He glanced at you.

“D-do you wanna… can w-we go talk? In the b-backyard?”

Undyne, Alphys, and Papyrus were pretending to watch the episode, still, but their eyes were on you. Frisk shot you a reassuring smile.

“sure.” Sans stood up and waited for you to stand before leading the way through the kitchen and out the back doors, his hands in the pockets of his jacket.

You considered for a long moment, then dropped down into the grass and looked up at the sky.

“you, uh, wanted to talk?” Sans prompted, sitting next to you.

“I lied to you.” You whispered.

Sans didn’t reply.

“M-monday before last, when I w-walked home alone for the f-first time… There were p-people waiting for me.” Telling Frisk, Chara, and Flowey had not made admitting this any easier, “They… They attacked me, uhm, and I T-traded myself with one of them t-to avoid being hit. I… I messed up. I Traded away my conscience. I almost h-hurt them. When I g-got home I… I started thinking… about G-gaster, and trying to… Trade people to m-make him… R-real? T-tangible? Memorable? I… I told you n-nothing happened s-so I could go out and p-pick fights, encourage them t-to… get more people. Enough People.”

Sans was totally silent.

“I… Flowey pointed out… what I’d l-lost. I got it b-back and I… I realized I w-was being… just awful and I w-was… I was lying t-to you…” You closed your eyes, unable to look over at Sans and see his expression.

Silence fell. It wasn’t a comfortable silence, it wasn’t a soft silence. It was a silence filled with tension and it all but _screamed_ at you.

“you ever notice that we saintify people when they die?”

You opened your eyes and looked at Sans. He was looking up at the stars, the white lights of his eyes distant.

“we look back and they’re perfect until the fresh pain fades, and then you remember what they were like.”

Your stomach clenched and you pulled your knees up under your chin.

“i think i sort of did that, but a little different. i hurt so much that i came back, and i fell in love with you again instantly because i was thinking about how perfect love had been before... but it was different. it was so easy this time. last time there was this big build up because it took you so long to even talk to me, but this time it was just falling into a spot on a puzzle board. i was kind of curious, you were different now from who you were then… i think it’s what kept me in place for so long.”

This was not the conversation you thought you’d be having, but it felt even worse.

“I… I don’t…”

“i’m not curious anymore.” Sans sighed, “maybe i could have prevented your death in the previous timeline if i realized that it wasn’t love, it was curiosity. i was... mistaken. it was just a game i never even realized i was playing.”

You felt like someone had slammed a sledgehammer into your chest.

“i’m sorry, that i built it all up like this but… i mean, it’s for the best. if i kept playing along you’d eventually get hurt more. if this fighting situation has done anything, it’s just shown me that this needs to stop. you need to get uninvolved before you end up in too deep.”

You wanted to throw up.

“If you d-don’t love me, then that’s…” That was devastating, it made your heart ache and filled your thoughts with a strange static, “That is your decision, Sans, b-but… You don’t get to trivialize m-me. You d-don’t get to say what we f-felt, what I felt in another t-time because of curiosity.” Tears stung in your eyes, but you refused to let them fall, “I loved you. I do love you, b-but I am an adult. If y-you don’t feel the same… I w-will hurt but I will not shatter. You d-don’t get to hurt me and s-say I was a toy, a… sad remnant of Maybe.” You met his dark eyes fiercely, “So if you d-don’t love me, say it and I’ll g-go.”

Sans hands were clutched tightly together, if he were human they would be white from lack of bloodflow.

“i don’t.”

“That’s c-copout Sans. Say It.”

Sans scowled and he looked away, “i… i don’t love you.”

It hurt, it hurt more than anything you’d ever felt in your life. It hurt more than your mother and father looking at you and never seeing you, more than them abandoning you in a city hours away from where you'd grown up.

Because Sans had pretended to care.

“Okay.” You breathed, and climbed to your feet on numb legs, “Have a, uhm, nice night Sans.” You walked to the door, feeling light headed and dizzy.

Sans made a noise behind you, but you didn’t look back, you couldn’t look back. You’d messed up, you knew you’d messed up, but maybe it was for the best. You loved Sans and you refused to make him miserable, and who wouldn't be miserable stuck in a relationship they'd turned back time on to repeat, only to realize how much of a mistake it was. You hesitated at the door, then realized you didn’t have the will to go back in. Couldn’t bring yourself to see a glimpse into the happy world you’d had.

You turned sharply and walked around the house.

“h-hey wait!” You stopped, but didn’t look back at Sans. “where-why aren’t you going inside?”

“I’m g-going home Sans. I need… to go home.” You whispered.

“just… wait a second, it’s dark. you should take undyne with you, you shouldn't walk home in the dark.”

You didn’t look back, you just started walking again, “G-go inside. You d-don’t… it’s none of your business.”

Sans froze and watched you walk off. Inwardly panic still beat at his chest. He wanted to chase you down, to apologize, to tell you it was a lie…

But…

If he did you’d come back. You’d be angry with him, but you’d come back and you would remain attached to the names of high profile monsters.

You’d stay a target.

Your name stayed trapped on his tongue and he watched you disappear into the darkness, because if he called you now…

You’d come back, and you’d die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Sweats nervously. Checks notes. Re-reads previous drafts*  
> Uhm, so... guess major plot things can happen even after rewriting a thing four times?  
> Seriously, that's not how that was supposed to end. Sans was supposed to not be able to say the thing, and a slightly awkward Thanksgiving was supposed to go down?  
> Uhm... *Sweats even more* I now have even more re-writing to do... While I'm not even entirely in state... well, uh, next chapter will be Sunday, I can't promise it will be happy...


	15. Loving you is what I was trying to do

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Confrontations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So! The reaction to last chapter was...wow. Pretty much how I was feeling when I was writing it haha.  
> But I was trying to figure out exactly what the hell let Sans move away from my original plan, so I wrote a side drabble in-between packing.  
> Aaannnnd I realized that someone planted this idea in Sans's head.  
> Also that there have been other characters planning rebellions in the back of my head.  
> (Which means there's lots I have to rewrite now, my goodness)  
> Anyway! Your clue for what made Sans act like Edward Cullen is that there are SIX beings that remember timeline A, and one of them said something to Sans.

_“Tell me about something you love?”_

_“...”_

_“What about your job? Did you like that? Before all this?”_

_“I… I l-love the l-library. It was m-my… my safe haven…”_

_“I wish… I wish I could have found you there, instead of here… like this.”_

_“I… I wish you c-could have, too… Ryan…”_

_~_

 

Sans stepped into Undyne’s house on auto-pilot, his thoughts swirling around and around in his head. He regretted the looks of heartbreak on your face, he regretted hurting you, but... He regretted when you died more.

Some of his self-loathing must have shown on his face, because the greeting he got wasn’t as exuberant as it normally would have been.

“Sans what… why are you coming in the f-front door?” Alphys asked slowly.

“And where’s the Nerd?” Undyne added.

“they went home.” Sans slunk over to the spot he’d been sitting in previously (with you, but you were gone now and you would probably hate him just like he wanted. good job sans, you're a real stand up guy and you definitely don't ruin everything good in your own life) and slid down the wall until he was in a miserable ball.

“WHAT?” Papyrus demanded, “BUT OUR HUMAN HAS SAID MANY TIMES THAT ANIME NIGHT IS THE HIGHLIGHT OF THEIR WEEK?!”

Sans buried his face in his knees, suddenly wishing he’d just gone home instead. He felt someone poking at his arm and glanced up to see Frisk frowning at him.

**What happened?**

“we broke up.” Sans said, “i don’t… i don’t love them.” The lie felt even more sour the second time.

Frisk took a step back, eyes wide, **Is this because of the fighting?** They signed hesitantly

“no... i-”

“Okay,” Undyne’s voice was scarily cold all of a sudden and Sans and Frisk turned slowly to look at her, “What fighting? And why the hell would you say something that messed up Sans? Why would you lie to us?”

Sans didn’t want to respond.

He didn’t have to.

“You _Idiot_ .” Sneered Flowey, “You absolute _moron_! Did you break up with them over the fighting?”

“no… i don’t-”

A small white pellet buried itself in the wall next to Sans’s head.

 **Flowey!** Frisk admonished.

“Stop, right now, start at the beginning, and then we’ll throw things at Sans.” Undyne demanded.

 **_____ has been… Getting in fights.** Frisk signed, watching Sans, **They got ambushed last Monday and used their magic, but it backfired and they lost a piece of their soul. They… their…** Frisk floundered. You hadn’t told anyone about Gaster except them and Sans, and Frisk had only told Flowey.

“There’s a monster that only _____ can see.” Flowey said shortly, Sans jerked and he glared at the flower, “They did something magical a long time and wiped themselves out of existence. The only one who remembered them was the trashbag, because the monster meant a lot to him. The monster saved _____ when they were a kid, so they could see him.”

 **When they lost the piece of their soul, it was their conscience.** Frisk picked the story back up after a second, not wanting to give anyone time to ask about Gaster, **They thought… They loved the monster, and they loved Sans, so they decided to pick fights with as many bad humans as they could so they could use their magic to Trade the humans for the monster. Flowey noticed that part of their soul was missing so they… they traded all of the pain they’d avoided to get it back. They realized what they were doing was bad, and they'd lied to Sans and felt awful about it. They were really sorry, and when we were attacked on the way home-**

“wait, what?” Sans interrupted, “they… you were attacked today?”

“Did you even let them finish explaining before you hurt them?” Flowey demanded.

“i... i thought i did…” Sans felt like his magic had turned to ice around his soul.

Undyne scowled, “I get being mad at them, it was a little messed up, but why the hell would you break up with them? A monster with half a brain and no senses can tell you two nerds love each other like crazy.”

“it’s… it’s better for them,” Sans said softly, “they’re already spending so much time around high profile monsters… and when the new law gets passed, and all the research comes out in _my name_ it’s gonna make me a huge target. we all knew that, and i can take care of myself but… i can’t risk putting them in even more danger…”

Another white pellet hit the wall on the other side of Sans’s head.

“You _utter moron_ !” Flowey growled, baring fangs at Sans, “They are _already_ in danger! None of you idiots have exactly been subtle in your friendship! They _already_ attacked a human to keep Papyrus,  _your brother_ , safe! They’ve been picking _fights_ with humans that sound like they might be on the verge of joining Purity for Above, if they aren’t already part of that stupid cult! They were tearing themself to _shreds_ over lying to you, and what did you do? _You lied back_. You think they’re going to be okay with this? You think they _deserve_ to be hurt when you already threw time and space to the wind for them? You absolute-” Flowey snarled and another pellet shot straight for Sans’s face. Sans didn’t move, his eyes were dark and empty, his grin was gone.

Undyne stepped between them and deflected the pellet with a spear.

“Enough.” She growled, and Their Friend Undyne was gone, replaced by Captain Of The Guard Undyne, “Right now _____ is outside, emotionally compromised and potentially in danger. Papyrus!”

Papyrus stood straight, his expression troubled as he watched his brother.

“Take Sans home. Sans, you will be coming over to _____’s house tomorrow to fix this or I swear in Asgore’s name I’ll kick your ass so hard the thought of sitting will make you want to cry for years to come. Papyrus, make sure he gets there.”

“Y-YES CAPTAIN! I MEAN, YES UNDYNE.” Papyrus saluted and very carefully picked the unresponsive Sans up.

“Frisk, grab the murder flower. Alphys, grab a blanket. We’re going to make sure _____ got home safely, and then…” Her face darkened, “We’re going to snuggle until they’re assured that _we_ love them, at least.”

Frisk scooped Flowey up obediently and Alphys grabbed several of the blankets off the pile on the floor.

Sans turned his head slightly as Papyrus carried him out of the house and met Frisk’s eyes. One of their eyes turned red, and both the souls in Frisk’s body gave him a disappointed look.

_~_

You sat on your front porch, arms wrapped around your legs and face buried in your knees. You’d given your spare key to Toriel a few weeks ago, never gotten around to replacing it, and your keys, phone, and book bag were all at Undyne’s.

In short, you could either spend the night on your porch or go back to Undyne’s, and pretend to be perfectly okay.

And have to see that apathetic look on Sans’s face.

...

Your pajamas were warm, you would be fine.

 _You’re being a mopey irrational mess,_ You thought at yourself in annoyance as your tears soaked your pajama pants, _You aren’t Sans, him breaking up with you isn’t the end of the world… Him telling you he doesn’t love you isn’t the end of the world. You're both rational adults and you're not going to die because a monster you absolutely adore doesn't actually care about you at all._  

You were just making it worse.

From inside your house static started up.

“You are my Sunshine, my only Sunshine,” You couldn’t stop the sob that wretched its way out of your throat as the radio in your bedroom, the one thing you'd kept from your childhood home, started up a familiar discordant melody. “You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you. Please don’t take my sunshine away. The other night dear, while I lay sleeping, I dreamt I held you in my arms. When I awoke dear I was mistaken, so I hung my head and cried. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know, dear, how much I love you, Please don’t take my sunshine away. I’ll always love you, and want you happy. You do not have to fear the dark. I’ll be right there, dear, be right beside you, and I will love you all of my days. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey. You’ll never know dear how much I love you, please don’t take my sunshine away.”

You looked up and Gaster faded into existence next to you as the radio shut off. You angled your body towards him, wishing you could actually lean into him.

“I’m s-sorry.” You whispered, “Y-you… I should h-have listened… but I thought… I h-had a chance to bring you back.”

 **It would have made you deeply unhappy when you caught up to yourself, I was warning you to stop because I love you,** Gaster signed with a gentle look on his face, **My little one, I am the one who is sorry. You do not deserve the hurt this world has done to you.**

“I… I’m s-so mad at Sans.” You told him, even as your heart broke, “B-but I still l-love him… even though h-he…”

 **He hurt you my little one, but you aren’t broken for loving him still.** Gaster assured you, **It is perfectly okay and normal to be upset with him, and still want him back. You must decide what you want to do next, for you.**

What to do next?

You stared out across the lawn and thought. You thought about your relationship with Sans, and everything you’d gone through, in both timelines.

You thought about what he’d said, how every word had seemed like a barb in your heart.

And frowned.

Sans could be lazy, he could be funny, and he could be rude… but you’d never seen him be cruel before. Even in the previous timeline on the one occasion you’d seen him actually engage in combat, he had been cold, angry, but never cruel.

So why had he been cruel to you?

 **He lied to me?**  You glanced at Gaster.

 **I cannot say for certain, but I believe strongly that my son loves you very much.** Gaster affirmed.

You rested your forehead on your knees for what felt like a long time, and you thought about sitting on the lawn and telling Sans about wishing on stars.

“I’m g-going to b-be upset.” You decided, “Tonight. Then t-tomorrow I’m going to g-go over and apologize f-for picking f-fights again, and k-kick his ass until he t-tells me the truth. Then... then I'll t-take it from th-there.”

“Hell Yeah!” Undyne’s voice startled you.

Undyne was standing on the sidewalk in front of your house, your book bag in one hand, a blue spear in the other, and she was beaming at you. Frisk was standing next to her, holding Flowey, looking equally pleased and Alphys was smiling shyly at you.

You blinked at them.

“You think we were going to let you get away with being all alone after the stupid stunt the trashbag pulled?” Flowey grumbled, “You’re… I mean… You keep things a little different… and stuff.”

“I th-think what Flowey is t-trying to say,” Alphys offered hesitantly, “Is that w-we, uhm, love you.”

Frisk nodded.

“So what are you sitting on the porch for?” Undyne asked, leaning against her spear.

Instead of answering you slowly stood up and padded over, fishing around in your book bag until you pulled your keys out.

Undyne looked from the keys, to you, back to the keys, back to you and shook her head with a sigh, “You nerd…”

You sniffed and without meaning to you started crying again. Frisk tugged you down to hug them around Flowey’s pot and Undyne and Alphys encircled you in their arms.

“Come on.” Undyne instructed gruffly, “Let's go inside.”

That night, snuggled in a bed that was decent sized for an adult human but just a bit snug for an adult human, a preteen human, a fish monster, a dinosaur monster, and a flower pot, you cried in the arms of your friends for the hurt that had been done, but fell asleep feeling loved and hopeful for tomorrow.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I wish I could say that everything will be happy in Tuesday's chapter buuuuttttt....  
> I have a plan again, if not the rough drafts that have gotten me this far.  
> I can say that there are a good number of happy experiences to be had before things get dark again.  
> Unfortunately, once things get dark again ya'll are going to need to hold tight to that happy ending tag.  
> Really tight.  
> Suspiciously tight.  
> Like 'it might disappear if I let go' tight.  
> (Timeline wise, just to give you guys an estimate of what's to come, the second to last chapter happens on Valentines day in the in story calendar... and it's going to be a Valentines to remember hoo boy. Then the last chapter, and the epilogue. Since I didn't have chapters actually sketched out in my original drafts, and now I've got characters running rampant, I can actually seeing this be about... twenty five chapters?)


	16. I hope you dance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You and Sans talk. Undyne explains how you're going to avoid fighting. Thanksgiving finally begins and your family is together again, for the first time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Talk about messing up your own cryptic clues /sigh/  
> Super sorry to Moss_Flowers who tried to solve my nonsense without me actually having my head on straight.  
> Seven.  
> There are Seven beings who remember Timeline A, not six.  
> For more poorly written cryptic clues, warnings on updates, and to ask me questions directly you can find me at sincidentsans.tumblr.com

_“you know i used to sleep like… pretty much constantly in the underground?”_

_You glanced up at Sans with a small frown, “B-but… You’re always asleep after me, and awake b-before me?”_

_Sans grinned, “yeah. i used to sleep in the underground cause… well even when i was having nightmares, i’d still get dreams too… and the dreams were usually so much better than reality.”_

_“W-what changed?”_

_“you did. you’re so much better than my dreams.”_

_~_

 

You were awake for a decent amount of time before you actually opened your eyes. You could hear soft chatter happening in the general vicinity of your kitchen, but there was still someone in the bed with you and you were reluctant to give up the comfortable numb brought on you both by your dreams and from crying the night before.

You didn’t have to open your eyes to know who was lying next to you. Everything from the way he breathed to the low thrum of his magic was as familiar as your own heartbeat.

Finally you opened your eyes and met his silent gaze. Sans lay on his side, eyes half closed as he watched you.

“papyrus brought me by this morning. undyne tossed me in and locked the door.”

You nodded, waiting.

“i… there’s someone at the embassy. we’re doing a lot of research together right now for that… that thing. we were talking yesterday and they said they were glad i was going to take all the credit for the research, because they weren’t sure they could handle… the stress of purity for above, and how they’re going to react. they said they wouldn't be able to take it if someone they cared about was hurt because of the research we’re doing, what we’re trying to do. i was thinking about that all day, about how i was trying to make a surprise for you and i was putting you in danger again. you wouldn’t died last time if you weren’t with me. if it weren’t for me you’d have been a sweet little librarian with a completely uncomplicated life, and when you said you’d been attacked all i could think was how it was happening again. you were getting hurt again because i couldn’t help but be selfish. i do love you. i love you so much that saying otherwise nearly made me sick. it was wrong, i would have realized that without everyone pounding it into my head but… i don’t know if it would have been in time.” Sans searched your face, “i… i know it might not have been in time with their help, and if you never want to see me again i’ll respect that…”

You watched him for awhile and eventually Sans eyes dropped down to the blanket, unable to meet your stare. Finally you pulled one of your arms out of the blankets and pulled the sleeve up, revealing the bruises littering your arm.

Sans frowned and lightly trailed his phalanges over each bruise, silently counting.

“My mistakes.” You said softly, voice still hoarse from sleep, “My lies. Physical.”

You pulled your arm away and tapped your chest with your hand, the spot where your soul emerged from when it was called out, “Your mistake. Your Lie. Emotional.”

Sans nodded, eyes dark, the whites of his eyes so faint they were almost non-existent.

“i messed up really bad.”

“Yes.” You acknowledged, “So d-did I. We… you c-can’t ever do that again. I’m n-not a curiosity, a toy. Y-you don’t get to say that.”

“i was trying to think of the most hurtful thing i could,” Sans admitted, “anything to make you walk away… because i couldn’t. i can’t ever walk away from you.”

You watched him sleepily, and finally sighed, “I’m s-sorry for fighting. F-for picking fights, even if I th-thought I had a g-good reason. F-for lying.”

“i’m sorry for hurting you. for lying. for making you doubt i loved you for… for putting that shattered look on your face.” Sans whispered, closing his eye sockets.

You reached over and tugged him closer, settling your forehead against his and closing your eyes, “Never again. F-for either of us, or th-this won’t work.”

“never again.” Sans agreed softly.

It wasn’t a perfect fix. You could still hear the distance in his voice as he said he didn't love you, the echo of how he’d hurt you, but you were willing to try to forgive him if he promised not to do it again.

You didn’t register falling back asleep, but apparently you did because one moment you were face to face with Sans, and the next you were half on top of him and blinking sleepily at Undyne as she shook you awake.

“You two nerds doing alright?” She murmured, glancing at Sans meaningfully.

You nodded.

“Good. Get up, if you’re covered in that many bruises then you won’t notice a few more from training.” Undyne said with a frightening grin, “If you’re going to have people gunning for your blood, we’re going to make them work for it.”

~

“Human on human encounters rarely, if ever, involve magic so they don’t seem like anything odd happens,” Undyne lectured you.

You were freshly showered and had left Sans asleep on your bed while you dressed in a loose outfit that wouldn’t restrict your movements.

“Monster on Monster encounters rarely happen because monsters rarely really fight over something seriously. Mostly it happens for training,” Undyne continued, “or to teach little kids to use their magic. Your magic is very important for an encounter, because you can only really use it on your turn unless you’re very good at magic and used to using it in encounters. You have magic, so even though you’re a human, you can initiate an encounter like a monster can.” Undyne gestured Papyrus forward, “Papyrus, for all that he’s strong as hell, is actually one of the safest monsters for you to practice encounters with because he has a lot of control over his magic.”

“WORRY NOT HUMAN, JUST REMEMBER THAT BLUE MEANS DO NOT MOVE AND ALL WILL BE WELL.” Papyrus assured you, and suddenly the world drained of color.

~~Papyrus believes in you!~~

It was a sensation very similar to stepping into The Void. The whispers began at the very edges of your hearing and even thought you could still see Undyne, Alphys, Frisk, and Flowey, all of your concentration was focused on Papyrus. Your soul was pulled out and it seemed like it was the only color in the world.

“There are four options you can use is an encounter,” Undyne continued, “As the challenged you get the first turn, it’s hard to overpower the rule of First Attack, and I personally have never seen it happen. Your options are to FIGHT, ACT, use an ITEM you are carrying with you, or you can use MERCY.”

As Undyne spoke you could feel the words in your mind, so heavy they almost felt like physical things floating between you and Papyrus.

“From what I can tell, your magic is a lot like Alphys’s and more Mental than Physical like Papyrus and my magic. For your first turn either ACT or use MERCY.” Undyne instructed.

**ACT- >Wave.**

You waved at Papyrus with a smile. Papyrus offered you a smile, and a wave of blue bones hurtled towards you. You froze instinctively and the bones passed right through you.

~~The Void whispers secrets in your ears.~~

“Good. If you get into an encounter with the humans attacking you, they’ll only be able to come at you one or two at a time and if you use an ACT to call for help, it gives us time to get to you.” Undyne grinned viciously, “And then I, we, can take care of the rest. Now use MERCY and we’ll see if you can initiate an encounter.”

You smiled at Papyrus and offered him MERCY. He accepted and color returned to the world.

~~0 EXP Won~~

“Alright, punk, step up and let _____ initiate an encounter with you.” Undyne told Frisk.

Frisk handed Flowey to Papyrus and stepped forward with a grin.

You glanced at Undyne quizzically.

“Oh right.” Undyne frowned, “Uhm, so… You want to reach for your magic? And reach for Frisk’s soul at the same time.”

Reach for your magic? You had plenty of experience in using it but…

Hesitantly you reached for The Void, and used a similar sensation to reach for Frisk.

Color bled from the world, except for the front of Frisk’s shirt where a red heart floated towards you. To your surprise a second soul floated in the shadow of the the first and the white outline of what must have been Chara appeared behind Frisk.

~~The Fallen Children stand before you!~~

You glanced at your friends, but no one seemed to notice.

 **First turn is ours.** Frisk signed and they waved at you.

You felt the weight of the choice settle over you.

**ACT- >Chara->Check**

~~The Void Whispers: The Price For Chara is Their Blood and The Bonds of a Human Soul~~

“Alright!” Undyne cheered. You grinned, but a choked sound caught your attention and you looked over to see sans leaning against the house, eyes flickering between you and Frisk and terror visible in his whole posture.

_Once upon a time Frisk and Chara slaughtered a dusty trail through the underground, killing everything they could find._

You felt Frisk offer Mercy and accepted it immediately ( ~~0 EXP Won~~ ), dashing over to Sans and hugging him.

 **Undyne is teaching me how to stay out of trouble,** You signed quickly, **We were using Frisk to make sure I could initiate an encounter.**

Sans was still watching Frisk shakily, “that… that won’t be an issue. i sent a message to our friend, i’m going to take you home for the rest of the week. until we find the guys giving you problems.”

 **It’s good for me to know, anyway.** You told him, but kept one hand on his shoulder as you walked him over to Undyne.

“BROTHER! YOU SHOULD TEACH OUR HUMAN ABOUT ENCOUNTERS AS WELL!” Papyrus suggested.

Frisk’s eyes went wide, and it was their turn to shoot you a worried look.

“eh, i think maybe encounters is a lesson for another time paps.” Sans offered.

“M-maybe… we could watch some Mew Mew… instead?” Alphys offered, “S-since we, uh, got distracted last night?”

Sans winced and you bit your lip.

“Sounds g-good Alphys.” Your grip on Sans tightened.

~

Sunday came and went. Monday you were on pins and needles but to your surprise there was no one watching you on your way to work. Even when Sans picked you up there wasn’t a single familiar, hostile face. Tuesday went the same and when Sans picked you up Wednesday you insisted on walking home with him instead of taking a shortcut.

“hey, uhm…” Sans fidgeted with your hand as you walked, “i… i’ve got a surprise for you, for tomorrow i mean. i have a surprise for you tomorrow. since it’s thanksgiving and everything.”

You raised an eyebrow at him.

“it’s part of your christmas present, a little early. i… i thought you might appreciate it and i wanted to make up a little bit… for what i said…” Sans stared down at the sidewalk.

You tugged him to a stop and kissed him gently.

Sans gave you a soft smile and when you got home you felt more at peace than you had in several days.

“tomorrow?” Sans asked softly.

 **Tomorrow**. You assured him.

Safely inside your house once more you grabbed a few miscellaneous items you didn’t want to forget, carefully tucked them into The Void, where you also had pies still hot and fresh from the oven resting, and went to bed.

(Someday, you promised yourself, you’d stop using the hungry infinite abyss as a place to keep things fresh. Someday.)

You were so eager to get to Toriel’s and start cooking the next morning you all but ran there, grinning as the November wind teased you.

“Mom?” You called softly, peaking in the door.

“We are in the kitchen, my child. Sans has your present here as well.” Toriel called you.

You grinned and darted into the kitchen.

Undyne had the turkey and, if how she was treating the bird was any indication, she had been personally insulted by said bird. Alphys was hovering nearby and trying to convince her bonded to please calm down before giblets went everywhere. Frisk and Papyrus were undoing all of Alphys’s good work by cheering Undyne on.

Toriel was sitting at the kitchen table with Sans.

And someone else.

The other person at the table had a messy ponytail, hair only a few shades lighter than your own. You froze, your eyes going wide as the person turned around and eyes the exact same shape and color as yours met your wide-eyed stare.

“Hey little sib,” Ryan said brightly, standing up and holding his arms open, “It’s been way too long.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy (part 1) of Sans's Surprise!  
> Man I hope there aren't too many mistakes, I got off work and went immediately off to do house buying stuff and only got home, like, an hour ago.  
> Guys, buying a house is so exhausting haha. I can't brain at all.  
> Expect a longer chapter Thursday as plot returns back to where it belongs and (maybe) i actually get a chance to sleep c(=


	17. How much I love you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanksgiving happens. Sore subjects get touched on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys for your support! I'm so glad people were happy to see Ryan, I've been super excited to introduce his character so that some healing could happen for Reader.  
> Not So cryptic clue for this chapter-  
> Who all remembers that guy who threw a rock at Papyrus and decked Reader? Anyone?  
> Yeah. Hm. That was awhile ago. Wonder what that guys is up to.  
> Anyway! For stuff on chapters, random this and that, and to ask me questions directly you can find me on sincindentsans.tumblr.com

_“What do you regret the most?”_

_“...”_

_“You can tell me. It’s not like we’re ever getting out of here together.”_

**_I regret that it wasn’t legal for me to marry Sans._ **

_“Does everything have to revolve about your skeleton boyfriend?”_

**_Fiance._ **

_“But seriously, I feel like I only ever hear about the skeleton.”_

**_I could tell you about Papyrus._ **

_“Who’s Papyrus?”_

**_Sans’s Brother._ **

_“...”_

**_Or Undyne, or Toriel, or Alphys, or Flowey, or Chara, or Frisk._ **

_“Who are they?”_

**_They’re the family I chose._ **

_~_

Ryan seems to droop a bit when you just keep staring at him, but finally with a barely contained squeal you dove at him and buried yourself in his arms.

Ryan clutched you tightly, you couldn't see the relieved grin spread across his face but you could feel the way he clutched you, like you would disappear if he let go.

“I looked for you.” He promised, “For ages. I worked, but every spare minute was looking for you. Mom and Dad moved everything to hide you from me, but I finally… I found you... I approached the Embassy with some research when I got into town. I wanted… I wanted it to be a big surprise, and Sans thought it would be a nice Christmas surprise but…”

“thanksgiving is for family, right?” Sans offered from the table, watching you with the softest expression.

“Yeah,” Ryan’s voice broke faintly.

You pulled back reluctantly, sniffing to keep your tears back.

**You looked for me?**

“Constantly.” His expression darkened, “Mom and Dad weren’t happy. They… well, you remember how they were. The experiments… they wanted me to focus, but I wanted to keep my promise. You’re my little sibling and I wanted you protected and safe.”

You buried your face back in Ryan’s chest, so relieved to know you were still wanted by the second most important person to you growing up.

“That is the cutest thing.” You heard Toriel murmur.

You looked around, **You know everyone? Everyone knew about this?**

Ryan was staring at your hands, brow a tiny bit furrowed, “Sorry sib, slow down a tiny bit. Most of my practical stuff has been translating Frisk lately.”

You signed again, less sloppily and his expression cleared.

“We knew of him,” Undyne explained as you were signing, “Sans and Alphys are the only ones who have been working with him. The rest of us just kind of see him around.”

You nodded and noticed Papyrus’s curious inspection of your brother.

“I HAVE NOT INTERACTED WITH YOUR BROTHER AT ALL, HUMAN.” Papyrus explained, “I AM LESS INTERESTED IN SCIENCE THINGS.”

“which is a shame cause you’re a genius bro.” Sans called over.

“I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS, I AM GOOD AT MANY THINGS.” Papyrus said proudly.

You looked up at Ryan and frowned slightly. He had an odd expression on his face. He noticed you looking and grinned.

“Conversation reminds me of how proud you used to be showing me off.” He explained with a grin.

You blushed, but returned the grin.

In the kitchen Undyne finally managed to finish preparing the turkey and Toriel gently ushered her out to take over. Undyne snagged the bag of potatoes on her way out and started peeling them.

“Hey Alphy, want to get a bowl of water so these don’t go brown?” Undyne called.

 **No need to make more dishes,** You assured Undyne, walking over and, with a bit of concentration you opened a window to The Void next to her, away from the pies.

“Did… did my little sibling just open a window to an empty plane of existence to store potatoes?” You heard Ryan ask slowly.

“yeah. they do that.” Sans responded, you could hear his grin.

You turned around and gave Ryan a sheepish grin as Undyne tossed an already peeled potato in The Void, **It keeps things fresh.** You signed sheepishly.

“You didn’t do that as a kid. Think of all the times we snuck out and forgot snacks.” Ryan teased, sitting back down next to Sans.

 **I did use it as a kid, just… not as well.** You smiled slightly. You had really only started using The Void as storage in High School, but when you were eight or nine you’d opened tiny windows and tried to pull Gaster through.

It hadn’t worked out, for obvious reasons.

Ryan pulled a notebook from seemingly nowhere and tugged a pen out of the spine, “That’s so cool, I’m adding that to my list of magical abilities, even if you aren’t a monster.” He declared, opening the notebook and scribbling in it. Sans peered over his shoulder and raised an eyebrow.

“where did you meet an aaron that could fly?”

“Oh, that was when I started initial experiments in-” Ryan paused and glanced at you with a mischievous grin, “in the thing. He just started floating away when you flirted with him enough.”

“huh,” Sans raised an eyebrow, “i wonder if that’s an aaron thing or if it happened because you were human?”

“Oh no, I wasn’t the one doing the flirting. It was the Woshua he, uh, came in with.” Ryan shook his head.

“really? you didn’t mention that before. do you think-”

“Boys.” Toriel said sternly, but smiling, “No working at the table.”

“Sorry ma’am.” Ryan blushed and ducked his head.

“sorry tori.” Sans grinned.

Your heart was full. This was a scene you’d never expected to imagine, let alone see. Sans and Ryan were exchanging shifty looks over the still open notebook, Toriel was watching them pointedly, Undyne was stealing kisses from Alphys inbetween tossing potatoes in The Void, Frisk was tugging Papyrus in the direction of the backyard, signing about playing tag, and you could even hear Flowey singing along to a cartoon somewhere in the house.

Gaster had faded into existence for a moment, but he seemed intent on following Frisk and Papyrus. He was still there, though.

This was perfect.

~

“Hey, you want to go outback and join Papyrus and Frisk playing around?” Ryan asked you hopefully.

You nodded and hopped up, then glanced at Sans.

“i’ll come out in a bit,” Sans told you with a smile. You nodded and grabbed Ryan’s hand, leading him in the direction of the backyard.

“Hold up a second,” Ryan said softly once you’d left the kitchen. You paused and looked back at him. Ryan suddenly seemed very somber.

“I… I wouldn't blame you if you were mad at me. I asked Sans to give us a chance to talk without everyone around.” Ryan glanced down at the floor, “I didn’t… I mean, I spent so much time looking for you, but I actually figured out where you were a little bit ago… but I realized that I’d spent so much time looking for you, I didn’t have anything to offer you. Sure I was your big brother, but I was still living with mom and dad, and the very last thing I wanted was to put you back in the same house with them.” His expression got very dark, “I am… I’m very upset with mom and dad, I’ve been mad at them since they moved you but it got worse over the past few years. I decided to put a lot of effort into researching things for and about monsters, and I wanted to kind of build myself up to someone who could actually protect you, you know? Someone you could be proud of. I’m sorry… I should have come earlier… I could have kept you safe…”

You smiled and placed a hand on his arm to get his attention.

 **You’re here now.** You signed slowly, **If you were here earlier I might not have met any of my friends, and I can’t regret them… but you’re here now, and you’re part of my family again.**

Ryan’s face became slightly rueful, “Do you have any idea how hard it is to do the threatening older brother thing to your teleporting research partner?”

You snickered, and remembered something Sans had said in passing, **Sans said that you weren’t going to take any credit for the things you’re researching together?**

“Sort of true,” Ryan started moving again and you took the hint to lead him to the backyard, “The specific thing we’re researching together right now is going to really annoy Purity for Above, and I’m just a little scientist. I’d rather they not set their sights on me when I’m trying to stabilize my life. Sans said he didn’t mind taking credit for the research, so he’s got it.” Ryan frowned, “I am a little worried he’s going to draw their attention to you, now, but it looks like you can take care of yourself, and I’ll always protect you if I can.”

You grinned at him.

“But, uh, right. My other research,” Ryan opened the door for you, “There’s a lot I’m doing that I’ll definitely take credit for eventually. Lots of stuff about monster magic and humanity’s potential for the rediscovery of our own magic. Some stuff about souls. Have you seen yours? I haven’t seen mine yet.”

 **I could probably show you,** You offered, **Or we could ask Papyrus?** The monster in question hadn’t noticed you two come out, he was intent on catching a giggling Frisk.

“You could?” Ryan seemed surprised, “No offense to Papyrus, but I think it would be pretty great if you would do it.”

You nodded and waved Frisk and Papyrus over. To your surprise there was no sign of Gaster, despite his following them earlier.

 **I’m going to start an encounter with Ryan to show him his soul.** You signed to them, **I didn’t want to startle you.**

“THAT IS A VERY FAMILY THING TO DO.” Papyrus assured you, “MY FIRST ENCOUNTER WAS WITH SANS, IT IS ONLY FITTING THAT YOUR BROTHER’S WOULD BE WITH YOU.”

You beamed at the skeleton and turned to Ryan.

“I’m ready whenever you are!” Ryan braced himself.

You snorted quietly and reached for his soul, and The Void.

~~The Void Scientist stands before you~~

You blinked at the odd message, and glanced at Ryan, who seemed oddly entranced with his own soul.

It was light blue, it reminded you of the sky on really clear bright days. Very much like yours, it was touched by the blackness of The Void. Where yours almost looked like roots where The Void had been planted to keep your shattering soul together, Ryan’s looked like a series of black stitches akin to Frankenstein's monster.

“Huh.” Ryan’s mused, looking over at your soul, “I thought souls tended to be one color. Is it a family thing do you think?”

 **Choose MERCY Ryan,** You signed, frowning.

“MERCY?” You felt the choice settle on you, and you accepted Ryan’s Mercy-

~~0 EXP Won~~

-and darting over to him.

 **Pull it back out, Papyrus.** You signed distractedly.

“Sib, what-?” Ryan couldn’t get a sentence out before Papyrus had obeyed you, tugging Ryan’s soul back out.

 **Mine, too, please,** You added. Your soul was tugged out of your chest and the violet heart rested next to the light blue one. You inspected closely as Ryan watched you curious as you ghosted your fingers over the black stitching, but did not touch it.

It was absolutely thread made from The Void.

You looked at Ryan blankly, not sure what to think.

“HUMAN, IS… IS EVERYTHING ALRIGHT?” Papyrus asked tentatively.

 **Ryan, why do you have Void stitched into your soul?** Frisk asked curiously.

“Void? Is that what the black stuff is?” Ryan poked his soul lightly and then jumped at the sensation it caused, “Interesting. I can’t say for certain of course, being that this is the first time I’ve seen my soul, but I expect it has something to do with the experiments I was in when I was younger… The better question is why do you have Void in your soul, little sib?” He eyed you with concern.

You understood his concern.

_“Another failure. It’s not taking to them like it did to Ryan.”_

_“One more try?”_

_“... I suppose it might not hurt.”_

 

_The air was full of an awful scent, and smoke. The heat of the fire beat on your back, there was nowhere to go._

_There was Nowhere to go and you were going to die._

_You thought of Ryan promising to play with you later, of momma asking you to be a good child, of daddy’s sad face when the men in white coats shook their heads._

_It was unbearable. You wanted to go home. You wanted your room. You wanted out of here._

_You yelled out, calling for mom, dad, Ryan, one of the men in the white coats, anyone…_

_But no one came._

_You lashed out in frustration and fear and you_ ripped _something._

 

“babe?”

Sans’s voice brought you back. At some point Papyrus had sent your souls back and you were just staring at the empty space between them.

 **What were our parents doing Ryan?** You signed, looking up to meet his eyes.

“I don’t know.” Ryan shook his head, “Whatever they were trying, it supposedly succeeded with me, but they couldn’t get it to work right on you.”

“babe?” Sans prompted again, “why are you messing with your souls?”

“THE HUMAN DESIRED TO SHOW RYAN HIS SOUL, BUT SOMETHING ABOUT IT FRIGHTENED THEM.” Papyrus explained.

“Frisk said I had Void on my soul.” Ryan shrugged.

Sans took your hand reflexively, watching Ryan warily.

“Hey, bud, relax,” Ryan held his hands up, “I didn’t exactly volunteer for the weird stuff our parents did when we were kids.”

You reached forward with your free hand and tugged Ryan into a hug.

You wondered what he was capable of, you wondered what he’d lost when The Void had become a part of him. For a second you were almost tempted to look at the Potential surrounding him, but it felt too much like spying on your brother instead of asking him questions.

You’d find out everything soon enough, you decided.

 **No more dark stuff, no more sad things today.** You signed to Sans, who looked worried still, **Just good things. Light things.**

“whatever you say babe.” Sans’s eye lit up with mischief.

_~_

“My children? Dinner is…” Toriel paused as she peered out the back door. You met her startled expression sheepishly.

You weren’t expecting Sans to grab you and teleport to the top of the big tree in Toriel’s backyard. Sans had declared ‘ownership’ of you, and what followed had been best described as a game of keep away by a teleporting skeleton, Papyrus had declared he would be the ultimate winner, and Ryan and Frisk had formed the human team and planned to rescue you from the ‘evil’ monster Sans.

Things had gotten a little crazy, and now there were more bones than could really be explained littering the yard.

 **Sorry mom,** You signed, back in the tree, dropping a club like bone you’d been using to defend yourself from the barrage aimed at Sans.

Toriel laughed, “Oh my child, it seems you are _boned_ , no?”

 **We were winning** **_tibia_ ** **honest,** You signed back with a grin.

“What’s this ‘we’ business?” Ryan demanded, “Frisk and I have been here fighting the good fight to save you and you were in cahoots with Sans the whole time?”

 **Betrayal!** Frisk signed before falling against Ryan, one hand on their forehead dramatically.

“FEAR NOT HUMANS, OUR SIBLING MAY HAVE BETRAYED US FOR SANS, BUT YOU WILL ALWAYS HAVE THE GREAT PAPYRUS BY YOUR SIDE!” Papyrus assured them.

“Thank you Papyrus, you have soothed the hole in my heart.” Ryan beamed at the tall skeleton.

“NYEHEHE, OF COURSE I HAVE.” Papyrus grinned.

 **But now that we know the truth, we have no choice but to declare war!** Frisk decided.

“After Dinner.” Toriel cut in, “Come along children.”

Sans brought you both down from the tree, and you grinned at Frisk, Papyrus, and Ryan, **Sorry guys, I could never side against my Vertabae.**

“THAT WAS AWFUL.”

“I have to agree, I think i’m physically in pain.”

 **At least he knows you’ve got his back.** Frisk added innocently.

“Why this?” Ryan clutched his chest like he’d been mortally wounded, staggering a bit, “From my own tiny human teammate. Shot through the heart.”

“COME ON NERDS!” Undyne yelled, “You’re all taking forever!”

You snorted, grabbed Sans hand, and followed Toriel back inside.

For the next few hours you spent time with your family, watching as everyone slowly relaxed around Ryan. It wasn’t as instantaneous as it had been with you, but they had been working with him a little bit at the embassy and it was obvious that they at least didn’t mind his presence.

And you? You were ecstatic. Dinner was great (although it was only about three in the afternoon when you all started eating) (The look on Ryan’s face when you pulled still hot pies from The Void was priceless, you could almost feel how much he wanted to Science in that moment) and after dinner everyone piled up on eachother in Toriel’s living room and you all watched Disney movies. The only ones not in the pile on the rug were Toriel and Ryan who sat on the couch.

When it started to get dark outside, you felt disappointed that the day was already ending.

“i’ll take you home, babe.” Sans murmured.

“Hey _____?”

You looked at Ryan with bright eyes.

“Do you want to hang out this weekend sometime? We can… I mean, I’m not going anywhere now.” He smiled at you hopefully.

You pulled your phone out and handed it to him meaningfully.

Ryan grinned and added himself as a contact.

You followed Sans out the door and took his hand, humming softly to yourself.

“did you like your surprise?” sans asked quietly.

You beamed down at him and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

“heh, i’m glad.” Sans smiled, but he seemed to be bothered about something, “babe… ryan said your parents-”

You shook your head quickly. HIs hand tightened around yours.

“Tomorrow. Today is a g-good day.” You told him softly.

“okay. we’ll talk about it tomorrow.” Sans obliged.

You hesitated in front of your house, not wanting to be alone but… You didn’t want to ask Sans to stay, and have Papyrus be alone.

“i… i’ll see you tomorrow?” Sans asked softly.

“Tomorrow.” You kissed him and stealed yourself, then went inside.

It felt empty after all the people you’d been around today, but it was a little nice to have a moment to digest everything that had happened.

You locked your door and wandered into your bedroom to get changed, your mind in a million different directions. You slipped into pajamas and, after a second of debating decided to make a cup of herbal tea before bed. You walked to your bedroom door and into the hallway and froze.

All the hair on your body stood straight up as you felt the undeniable sensation of eyes on you. Very slowly you turned your head to the right, ascertaining the hallway was empty and turned your head, checking the living room, the front room.

And stopping on the last window to your left.

There was a face in the window, staring at you, vaguely familiar grey eyes met yours as a slow smile made its way across the face.

Then it was gone.

Heart in your throat you darted back into your room and slammed the door. You stumbled to your bed where you’d dropped your phone and your hands were shaking so hard you almost couldn’t make the call.

“hey babe did you forget-”

“Sans.” Your voice was shaking, “Sans there’s someone- He w-was- I w-was- _S-sans there w-was someone w-watching me_.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So when I was writing about reader feeling someone watch them, a car backfired out my window and I almost cried.  
> Faces outside my window are my worst nightmare.  
> I live on the third floor haha, talk about silly.
> 
> Curious about Ryan's Soul? http://sincidentsans.tumblr.com/image/140419347897


	18. Is this to End in Fire?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The face in the window has a name.  
> It's an old friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, eighteen chapters later we finally start to address the main plot.  
> Sheesh I ramble a lot...  
> I'm glad you guys liked Ryan! And I'm glad I'm not the only one with an unreasonable fear of faces in windows. (Like, seriously, it could be my moms face and I'd still get scared. It's plain silly.)

_“hi, do you have any books on astrology by chance?”_

_You beckon the skeleton to follow you and point him to the astrology books._

_“hey thanks, i appreciate it.”_

 

**_It would… make things easier if you could avoid the skeleton brothers. Please._ **

 

_“what’s your problem with me?”_

_You don’t respond. Instead you firmly keep Gaster’s broken expression in the forefront of your mind. You’d do anything to keep that look off of his face, even if it meant insulting this funny skeleton._

 

_~_

 

Sans appeared at your side so suddenly you almost lashed out at him. Your nerves were painfully raw and even the presence of your boyfriend wasn’t enough to comfort you as you knelt by your bed, phone clutched desperately to your ear.

For the very first time you were glad your bedroom had no windows. The fire hazard that had plagued you more than once is now a relief you can’t give voice to.

“are you okay? are they in the house? who was it? what’s happening?” Sans asked rapid fire, kneeling next to you. His voice had a disjointed echo and you realized that both of you still have an open line on your phones, both lines are picking up on his voice, making the situation even less real, more nightmarish.

You were frozen, unable to move and your breath was coming out in strange staticy hisses. Your rational mind was telling you to move, to explain to Sans what had happened, but there was a little childlike voice in your head telling you not to move because if you moved it would find you, it would come to get you, there would be no escape no matter who was there.

“babe, babe please look at me? are you okay?”

Painfully you released your grip on your phone and finally dropped it onto the bed, spinning on one knee and burying yourself in Sans’s jacket, clutching at him like he was your last lifeline.

“H-he w-was l-l-l-l-” You were shaking so hard you couldn't even start to move your hands, even if you had the will to release Sans, “W-watching. Th-the w-w-window. Watching.” You wanted to say more, but you were holding onto your emotions by a thread and you could feel your throat closing.

Sans looked down at you, buried in his arms and shaking like a leaf in the wind and was faced with a choice.

He could find whoever had frightened you so badly and give them a bad time, or he could stay with you.

He carefully hung up the open line between his phone and yours, and hit one of his speed dial contacts.

“What’s up Sans?” Undyne asked easily, the sounds in the background implying she was watching an anime with Alphys.

“get to _____’s house. someone was watching them.” Sans said shortly. He heard Undyne move on the other end.

“Is it one of the punks they were fighting?”

“i don’t know. as quick as you can, please undyne.”

“Call the cops, Sans. We don’t have a lot of authority because they’re human. I’m bringing Toriel.” Undyne hung up on Sans.

You were still shaking, but the combined voices of Sans and Undyne had calmed you a bit.

‘Four of us,’ You reassured yourself, ‘Sans, Undyne, Mom, and you. You’ll be fine.’

Sans started rubbing soothing circles on your back until you stopped shaking, and then you started to feel upset about your reaction.

“S-sorry.” You whispered into his jacket.

“about what?”

“P-panicking. S-scaring you. B-being w-weak…”

“hey,” Sans pulled you back slightly to look you in the eyes, “what? who said you were weak?”

You glanced away, “I-i know s-some magic. I c-can p-pull humans into encounters, I’ve b-been trying t-to tell you I c-can t-take care of m-myself and then I j-just…”

“you had a good day,” Sans said gently, “you were home. you were supposed to be safe and not have to worry. Your guard was down, anyone would react in the same way. you aren’t weak at all. i’m so glad you called for me instead of trying to handle it yourself, because that means you trust me.”

You frowned slightly. It hadn’t crossed your mind to try to handle it yourself, to go outside and confront whoever had been there. Seeing a face looking in at you from a window, wearing a smile that would have been friendly in any other scenario, had terrified you and in that instant you had wanted Sans by your side more than you wanted anything in the world.

You hugged him tighter.

“come on,” Sans urged gently, “let’s get off the floor, okay? I have to call the cops before undyne gets here, or she’ll kick my ass.”

You let Sans pull you up off the floor, but tugged him onto your bed with you.

“I c-can’t go back out there. N-not j-just yet.” You pleaded softly, you could still see the man’s face clearly and it sent your heart galloping a thousand miles a minute.

“of course not, we’ll stay right here until Undyne and Toriel get here.” Sans promised, pulling you into him.

He cuddled you as he made a call to the police, gave them a description of the situation and a tailored run down of your fighting (he never said you started it, but implied that you had been reacting to hate groups targeting you.)

By the time the knock sounded at your front door you were finally calm enough, after listening to the thrumming of Sans’s magic in his bones, that you didn’t hesitate when you lead to out of your bedroom door.

You couldn't stop yourself, however, from immediately looking to the window you’d seen the face in, tense with nerves.

There was nothing there.

Sans eyed the window as well and gave your hand a reassuring squeeze. Sans opened the door, keeping you every so slightly behind him, just in case, but he was swept aside in an instant by Toriel.

“Oh my child, are you well? What happened?”

“undyne, officer.” Sans said, resigned as Toriel checked you over.

You looked over to see a vaguely familiar face, and then it clicked. The officer standing at your doorway was the same one who had interviewed you when you had been attacked with Papyrus at the store.

What a neat little circle the world worked in sometimes.

“Ah, you again,” Officer Doyle said with recognition, “So, you pissing off Purity for Above doesn’t end at grocery stores.”

“it’s become a bit of a habit of theirs unfortunately.” Sans glanced at you.

“What happened?” Undyne demanded.

You reluctantly pulled yourself out of Toriel’s comforting embrace and began signing, she kept one arm around your shoulders.

**I had just gotten home and changed into my pajamas. I was going to make a cup of tea because I was still a little excited after everything today, but when I came out of my room I could feel someone watching me. I looked around, and there was a face… a man was looking through my window. Watching me. He smiled when he saw me see him, like he was waiting for me, then he was just gone.**

As soon as Sans had seen the confused look on Officer Doyle's face, he had begun translating for you.

“Which window did you see him in, and was it anyone you knew?” Officer Doyle asked, taking notes.

You pointed to the window, then nodded.

 **It was the man that tried to hit Papyrus with a rock. I recognized his eyes, immediately. They… they were so cold…** You hesitated, unable to explain how those eyes made you feel. Like the eyes of a dead man peering at you through glass.

Officer Doyle’s face grew grim.

“That’s not good news. I was able to get a positive ID on that man a few days ago… How up to date are you on Purity for Above’s activities?”

“Officer, we try to stay well educated about them.” Toriel said tersely.

Officer Dock nodded, “Yes, but I meant specifically for our friend here.”

You hesitated, **I… I try to keep up on what the public knows, but I don’t ask my friends for any other information. I don’t want to make them uncomfortable.**

“Mm,” Officer Dock nodded, “That’s a nice thought. I assume you are aware of the regular ‘Press Releases’ they send out which usually include murder, or threats of murder?”

You nodded slowly.

“In their latest one they made a mistake, just a second but our guys caught it.” Officer Dock pulled a piece of paper from her pocket, “This hasn’t been released to the public yet, honestly it might not, but every police station in the country got this picture yesterday. I brought it because the description of his face was familiar.”

You reached out and took the paper and unfolded it with numb hands.

The picture was slightly blurry, and the face it held was spattered with red.

But the eyes…

You handed the paper back, ears ringing.

Maybe it was the stress of the night, maybe it was the blood on his face…

But you remembered.

 

_“You’re being given a chance, one most people would kill for.” He advised, crouching in front of you, “The big bosses wouldn't do this for just anyone.”_

_You didn't respond, just stared down at your tied wrists, your face twisted into a defiant expression._

_“The bosses will be sad, but… I guess spoiled little traitors can’t do any real good in the world unless they die for it.” He sighed and stood back up, “Still, I’ll miss our talks.”_

_A hood went over your head and you couldn’t see anything as movement happened around you. You could hear the others being lead in and wished you could offer them any comfort. You knew what was going to happen to you all now._

_You wished Gaster hadn’t gone away, but at the same time he’d been miserable unable to communicate with Sans._

_Now you were without both of them, and you were about to die._

_“This is what happens to traitors who lie with monsters.” A heavily distorted voice announced, but even distorted you’d talked with ‘Captain’ Jonathon Sates enough to recognize his voice. Your wrists felt raw from the rope, but you still fought to sign one final message to the camera you were sure was watching._

_“That was pretty pointless, kid, we’ll just end up cutting it out.” He lectured you through the voice changer._

_You felt cold metal against your neck._

_You felt a tug on your soul._

_You felt everything go dark._

 

“My child?” Toriel’s voice brought you out of the memory. You looked up from your hands and sought out Sans, reassuring yourself that he was there, that you were still standing in your living room and not kneeling on a cement floor waiting to die.

 **That was him.** You signed, but you kept your eyes on Sans, wondering if he would understand all that you were saying.

By the way his eye sockets went black, he at least had an idea.

“This man is Jonathon Sates, a former Captain of the Army. We’ve also identified him as the man to perform every public execution Purity for Above has released.” Officer Doyle said grimly, “And judging by the look on your face I don’t even need your friend to tell me that you recognize him.”

“They said that he was the one they saw.” Undyne said softly, taking the paper from the officer’s hands. You looked at her, and you could see how angry she was, “This guy… he’s killed a lot of people. We’re not about to let _____ be another one of them.”

‘He already has killed me.’ You thought humorlessly, ‘Now he wants to do it again.’

You glanced back over at the window, and even though it was a memory you could still see him smiling at you. See his grey eyes flashing.

Hear his voice before the bag went over your head.

Smiling at you like an old friend.

_“I’ll miss our talks.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So. Captain Sates has taken an interest in Read.  
> For the second time it seems.  
> Here's hope it turns out better for them in this timeline than it did last timeline ;)  
> I'm sorry it's so short guys, I'm trying to get these next couple of chapters in a decent length, but it feels like they're all either going to be short or too long urgh. Sorry.  
> Next chapter should be a decent amount longer as it takes us through December!


	19. Never Be Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Papyrus is definitely not jealous. You teach the skelebros Monopoly. Sans wants to ask you something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, it's not as long as I was hoping, but I decided to cut it here so there would be one more happy chapter before everything goes to actual hell.  
> If you want updates, to ask me questions directly, or little bits and pieces you can find me at sincidentsans.tumblr.com

_“You seem like such an intelligent person, can you not see how disgusting monsters are? Our ancestors locked them away for a reason.”_

_You didn’t respond._

_“If you would just see reason you could join us. Despite your unsavory ties, I like you, the bosses like you, you’re intelligent. You would fit in well.”_

_“N-never.”_

_“Don’t be so dramatic”_

_~_

You missed your monster guard.

“_____, are you in trouble?” David asked slowly, eyeing the police car that had dropped you off at work.

You sighed deeply, “I’ve b-been t-targeted by a t-terrorist organization. The p-police are h-hoping t-to catch them w-watching me.”

“Huh.” David mused with a frown, “What about your friends?”

“It w-would d-definitely end in v-vigilantism.” You admitted, remembering Sans’s flickering eyes and the spears that had been thrust through your floor, “I’m l-living with mo-Toriel until… it’s s-safe.”

David nodded and placed a hand on your shoulder, “Stay safe, okay? We like having you around here.”

You smiled at David and nodded before moving over to the Returns cart, the perfect image of calm.

You were not calm. You were in fact very worried about many things.

Jonathon Sates was definitely one of them. At the very top of the list, in fact. There was a police officer staking out your house in case he came back, but his face haunted your dreams. Both natural dreams, and the memories of the previous timeline.

Your parents were another worry. In the previous timeline their response to your monster friends had been immediate, and you hadn’t even stopped seeing Dr. K until after their confrontation. Now you’d stopped seeing Dr. K out of the blue and hadn’t heard a word from your parents, not a peep, and the stipend they provided you had been in the bank just like always. You hadn’t touched a cent of it.

Sans was another worry. He hadn’t left you alone last night, walking you to Toriel’s and holding you in the guest bedroom. When you’d woken up from nightmares he’d still been awake and soothed you to sleep.

You were very worried for how Sans was taking this, about how he was taking the reminders of your previous death as you neared the date it happened.

You glanced at the police car outside and suppressed another sigh. To be fair there was a lot to be worried about right now.

You pushed troubling thoughts aside and forced yourself to concentrate on work, tearing through it with a sort of furious passion, moving through returns into book repairs, into unpacking the boxes that had started to come in with the new books and getting them library ready.

You barely even noticed when your shift drew to an end, until a hand was placed on your shoulder, drawing you out of your thoughts.

“Hey,” Ryan smiled, “How was work?”

You blinked at him in surprise.

“Sans said he was walking you home, I asked if he wouldn’t mind if I tagged along.” Ryan explained.

“and who am i to deny my study buddy, and my datemate’s brother who happen to be trapped in one nice, neat, convenient body together?” You couldn’t stop yourself from smiling the moment you saw Sans. “miss me?”

**Always.**

“really?” Sans matched your smile, “not telling a fibula, are you?”

**Would I ever patella you a lie?**

“it’s mandible that you’re honest with me.”

“You guys are the worst.” Ryan groaned, “I changed my mind, I can’t walk with you if you’re gonna do this.”

You snorted and grabbed your jacket from behind the library desk, signed out, and waved goodbye to David and Emma.

Sans held your hand the moment you stepped out of the door and you watched out of the corner of your eye as the police car, who had traded out shifts around noon, started up.

“Is there a reason we’re being followed by the cops?” Ryan asked conversationally.

“that thing you were worried about? with purity for above?” Sans said, hand tightening around yours, “happened without our help.”

Ryan gave you a worried once over, “You’re okay, you weren’t hurt?”

You grinned at him, thankful, not for the first time, for the weather appropriate option of long sleeved shirts that neatly hid your still healing bruises from your venture into Fight Club.

**Perfectly Fine.**

“they’re staying at tori’s until we get things taken care of.” Sans told Ryan.

Ryan’s face lit up, “That’s a great idea. They’ll be near Frisk, and Queen Toriel is very strong. They’ll be safe and happy there.”

Sans nodded, pleased, “yeah, they will.”

~

“what’s up paps?” Sans asked curiously, watching Papyrus glare through the window at something.

“WHAT? OH, NOTHING. NOTHING IS UP. AT ALL. IN THE SLIGHTEST.” Papyrus offered a wide smile that was not in the least convincing.

“uh huh, so there’s probably nothing through that window, right?” Sans asked casually.

“OF COURSE THERE ARE THINGS OUT THERE. THE OUTSIDE, TORIEL’S HOUSE. EVERYDAY THINGS, NO NEED TO LOOK OUT THERE.” Papyrus stood up to close the blinds.

Sans beat him to the window.

“... ryan and _____?” Sans looked at Papyrus in confusion, “were they what had you looking like a thundercloud?”

“OF COURSE NOT. WHAT REASON WOULD I HAVE TO BE GLARING AT OUR DEAR HUMAN AND THEIR OLDER BROTHER? THERE IS NOTHING BUT HAPPY THINGS THROUGH THAT WINDOW. THE HAPPIEST!” Papyrus denied, shutting the blinds, and the curtains beside.

“what’s a matter paps?” Sans urged gently, “you can tell me.”

“IT IS CERTAINLY NOTHING.” Papyrus denied.

Sans glanced back out the window thoughtfully, “paps… are you… jealous of ryan?”

“WHAT? WHAT WOULD I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, HAVE TO BE JEALOUS ABOUT? NOTHING! THAT IS WHAT! EVEN IF OUR HUMAN NOW HAS TWO PERFECTLY GOOD HUMAN SIBLINGS, I KNOW THEY WOULD NOT FORGET ABOUT ME. I AM NOT JEALOUS OF THE RYAN HUMAN.” Papyrus looked away, “I JUST DON’T LIKE HIM IS ALL.”

“aw, paps,” Sans gave his brother a tight hug, “they love you just as much as ryan, probably more cause what’s not to love about you? you’re the best. there’s no reason to be jealous of ryan, bro.”

“I AM NOT JEALOUS.” Papyrus insisted.

Sans grinned at Papyrus and pulled his phone out, shooting you a quick text.

A few minutes later there was a knock at the door and Papyrus opened it to see you with a board game under one arm.

 **Do you want to play Monopoly Papyrus?** You asked hopefully, **Just you, me, and Sans?**

Papyrus grinned delightedly, “JUST THE THREE OF US HUMAN?”

 **Just us three, Ryan went home.** You shared a smile with Sans.

“VERY WELL! I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, ACCEPT YOUR CHALLENGE OF THIS MONOPOLY! WHATEVER IT MAY BE!” Papyrus said excitedly.

You grinned and drug Sans and Papyrus into the kitchen. The board game was a slightly older version, but all the money and pieces were there, which is what counted. You explained the rules, set up the board, and started playing.

A few hours later you were staring at the board in frank disbelief.

Papyrus had started the game a little roughly, buying up every property he could as soon as he could, and very nearly going bankrupt just by landing on your cheap little property next to the Go square… but then you and Sans had started to land on Papyrus’s properties.

Then Papyrus had landed on Park Place and Boardwalk, one right after the other, and things started to snowball. From the poorest player in the weakest position, Papyrus went to ridiculous wealth in several turns. You’d never seen or heard of someone landing on Boardwalk as often as you and Sans had. If Papyrus wasn’t such an innocent cinnamon roll, you would have been certain he was using magic to cheat. As it was, Sans was eyeing his last two twenties, the biggest bills he had, and the properties he’d managed to hang onto.

“babe… babe you know there’s only one way we can win this, right?” Sans asked while you were doing furious math to see if you could survive landing on a Hotel’d Boardwalk again.

You glanced at him.

“we have to get married and pool our resources, it’s the only way to win.”

You glanced from your cash, to his properties, to Papyrus who was clearly having the time of his life.

“I’LL ALLOW IT.”

So you and Sans melded your tokens into one, by which you meant you placed Sans's hat on top of your horse and rider, and pooled your money and resources.

It kept the game going another two hours, but in the end even the combined might of you and your boyfriend was not enough to defeat the sheer power of Papyrus’s Monopoly empire.

“that was terrifying and amazing.” Sans declared, handing the last of your combined money over to Papyrus.

 **Papyrus, you are definitely King of Monopoly.** You signed at him solemnly.

“NYEHEHEHE! THANK YOU! I WILL BE A KIND AND JUST RULER!” Papyrus declared proudly.

 **At least at first.** You signed, remembering a deal he’d made where he let you land on Boardwalk free for two turns in exchange for one of your properties a few hours earlier. He’d promptly put hotels on that property, too, and you’d landed on it the next turn.

“NYEHEHEHE!” Papyrus grinned but didn’t refute you.

“we got schooled babe, by my little brother.” Sans beamed, “i’m so proud.”

~

You panicked when you were awoken by a small form barreling into your sleeping body.

 **SNOW!** Frisk signed excitedly while you stared wide eyed at them, adrenaline surging through you.

“HUMAN IT HAS SNOWED!” Papyrus joined Frisk on top of you a moment later.

You placed a hand on your surging heart and closed your eyes.

“HUMAN?”

You glanced at the clock. Seven in the morning. On a Sunday.

You looked down at the excited faces.

**… You wake Sans up yet?**

Frisk shook their head excitedly.

 **Go forth and do evil. I’ll join you in a minute.** You signed with a small smile.

Frisk shot you the brightest smile you’d seen them wear, then they and Papyrus were out of your room like a shot.

“I tried to stop them,” Toriel offered, walking in with a mug of Hot Chocolate, “Here my child.”

You sat up and accepted the hot chocolate happily.

“On days like these, warm chocolate seems perfect to counter the cold outside,” Toriel offered, sitting on the foot of the bed.

You scooted out of the covers and hugged Toriel tightly, **Thanks mom, for everything.** You signed sincerely.

“Of course, my child, and you should know that even when it is safe for you to return home, this room is yours for whenever you need it.” Toriel promised.

You took a sip of hot chocolate to wash down the sudden lump in your throat.

“You are always welcome here, and should you decide to stay here more permanently until you and Sans settle down,” Toriel said suggestively, “I, personally, would not object.”

You turned red, but you smiled into your mug anyway, thinking of how nice it had been to come home to someone waiting for you, happy to see you. To Frisk poking their head in the door checking on you in the mornings to make sure you were still there, and the quiet excited noises they made to Flowey (Who apparently went to school with Frisk a lot more often than you’d thought.)

 **Maybe that would be nice,** You signed, setting your hot chocolate aside for a moment.

Toriel swept you into a hug, “You do not have to decide this morning, it is always on the table for you. I believe that you had best dress warmly, though, as Frisk and Papyrus are sure to return soon.”

~

“hey.” Sans is hiding with you inside a small fortress of snow you’d traded into existence to save your life. (That wasn't an exaggeration, Undyne took snowball fights as seriously as real fights.)

“H-hey.” You grinned down at him, cheeks flushed with cold and a wild grin on your face as you lobbed another snowball out of the ‘window’ and started gathering more snow.

“so, uhn… i’ve got a question for you.”

You ducked down below the window to avoid being nailed by a snowball, abandoned your baby snowball, and cuddled up next to him in the safety of the spot under the window.

“G-go ahead?”

“i mean, it’s sort of the unexpected sequel to another question.” Sans admitted.

You raised an eyebrow at him.

“do you… remember the stars?”

You glanced up instinctively, even though it’s not even afternoon and you put a roof on your fortress, “I’m f-familiar w-with them.”

“no, i mean my question about the stars?” Sans cheekbones are dusted with blue and you look at him without comprehension for a moment.

_“I’d like you to count the stars with me?”_

_“The stars are infinite, S-sans.”_

_“i know, it’s a long term project… but i’d like to spend forever with you, so it seems kinda fitting...”_

Suddenly the red in your cheeks had nothing to do with the cold.

“I r-remember.”

Sans nodded and you realized he was fidgeting with his jacket, “i was, uh wondering if you still wanted to? count the stars with me, i mean?”

You leaned your head on his shoulder and sighed, “I thought y-you’d never ask. Again.”

Sans leaned his head against yours, “would you, uh, want to make it all legal and stuff as soon as it’s legal?”

“The m-moment it’s legal.” You agreed instantly, “The s-second, even.”

Sans grins and buried his face in your hair, “cool,” He murmured, “i, uh, got you something. i had some input from a few people. and by a few people i mean literally everyone gave me their input, it was nerve wracking.”

You looked at him with a bemused expression.

Sans handed you a ring box, cheekbones still stained dark blue.

Outside your fortress there was a wild whoop, followed by Undyne’s triumphant “HE ASKED!”

You took the ring and without hesitation kissed your silly, wonderful skeleton boyfriend.

Skeleton Fiance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you spot the loverofpiggies homage in this chapter?


	20. Blood in the Breeze

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You remind Frisk for the third time not to reset for you, because good things always come in threes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here it is folks, the beginning of the end.  
> Fasten your seatbelts, because it's going to be a rough ride.  
> Here's your reminder that the second to last chapter takes place on the day before Valentines Day in the story, just in case you were curious how this was going to go down.  
> (So sorry again for the short chapter, but I've been working on something on the side of this.)  
> (Next chapter will be more along the length the original chapters were, since I've got them typed up already and not sitting in a notebook)

**_Where are we Gaster?_ **

**_We are in The Void, I am sorry. I could not protect you, I could only save you._ **

**_Will I ever see Sans again?_ **

**_I… do not believe so._ **

_~_

You sat patiently on the edge of your bed, waiting.

It was December 21st, the Christmas Eve party that had sent things cascading in the previous timeline was in a few days, and there was only one person who could answer the questions you had before that happened.

Gaster materialized next to you, sitting on the edge of the bed but making no dent in the mattress, not ruffling the sheets, as always there was no sign that he was there other than what your eyes told you.

**I don’t remember my time with Purity for Above. Sentences. Words. Nothing concrete. Why?**

Gaster regarded you with sadness.

**It was too close, too harmful. Your soul destroyed those memories with the Reset.**

You gnawed on your bottom lip,  **Can't you tell me what happened?**

Gaster shook his head regretfully,  **If I could, I would.**

**Why can't you?**

**I left you. Not a day goes by that I don’t regret my decisions from the other timeline, first keeping you from Sans for so long, and second deciding I could not be so close to my children when only one of them could see me. It hurt you when I left, but you were so strong. Are strong. I do not know what happened to you in Purity for Above, by the time I realized how foolish I was being, I arrived only to save your soul.**

You looked down at your hands with a small frown.

**It feels… like it’s really easy for people to leave me…**

Gaster held a hand out and lead your attention back to him, **No, little one, no. You aren’t easy to leave at all. I’ve found it easier to run ever since I entered The Void, that has been how I’ve dealt with things. I promise you that it was terribly hard to leave you, and I could not stay away after I had.**

 **You left me again, though, in this timeline.** You pointed out, heart aching.

 **No, I was invisible to even your eyes, but this time I stayed by your side even when you could not see me.** Gaster promised.

You nodded, and wished that you could hug Gaster, grateful for the reaffirmation that he really did love you, that he wouldn't leave you.

 **I am sorry, I got distracted,** You signed to him with a weak smile, **So we have no way of finding where Purity for Above was when I died there? Or where Sates could be?** A shiver ran down your spine at the thought of the grey eyed man

 **I am so sorry, my little one, I have already checked the area where you died and found nothing.** Gaster admitted.

You nodded, **It would really be too much to hope that they would be set up near there where we could direct the police to them.**

 **Stay strong, my little one.** Gaster signed, **Good things lie in your future.**

~

“hey babe,” Sans greeted you as you walked out of the library.

“Sans,” You kissed him and gave him a bright smile.

“do you mind if we take a detour on the way home? it seems like it’s been killer to get you to myself lately.” Sans threaded your fingers with his.

“I’m agreeable t-to this.” You nodded. It had been a little difficult getting alone time with Sans ever since he proposed. It seemed like you were constantly surrounded by Ryan, Undyne, Frisk, or Papyrus the moment Sans got the ring on your finger.

“i love everyone, i really do,” Sans shot you a wry smile, “but i think they’re worried i’m just going to make off with you and get married in secret.”

“A w-weekend in Vegas?” You asked with a small smile, which then faltered, “W-well… W-we could bond, b-but marriage is still kind of o-off the table, huh?”

“if you could, would you marry me on christmas day?” Sans asked conversationally.

You raised an eyebrow at him, “I-if I could I w-would marry you r-right now, Sans. Only s-stupid laws are stopping me.”

Sans let you to the park where you’d spent an afternoon making terrible puns on the playground equipment. It was covered in a thick layer of snow now, but in several spots the snow had been scraped up to make snowmen, and snow angels dotted the semi-smooth expanses.

“so you’d be totally up for getting married on christmas?”

You blinked and stopped, looking at Sans in shock, “S-sans… can w-we get married on Christmas?”

“well, thanks in no small part to the research your brother has been helping me do, the human government has finally got a way to track bonds to their satisfaction. It turns out there are these spider web thin tendrils of magic that stretch between bondmates, and your brother actually wrote this entire report on how monster genetics work? he’s kind of a mad scientist, but in a good way. that report was the reason frisk had to be out of the embassy for a little while though, tori was one hundred percent not up for ryan giving the kid the moldsmall and woshua talk and anyway between that and the research he'd done on bonds previously and the stuff we've been doing since november, which has been hectic let me tell yo-”

You kissed Sans to quiet him, “S-sans. W-will it be l-legal to get m-married on Christmas?”

“yeah. yeah it’s, uh, actually going into effect christmas eve morning since the human government wasn’t big on working on it on christmas, but yeah. we can get married on christmas, if you want. that was going to be your christmas present, but then frisk reminded me that i hadn’t even proposed to you this timeline, and ryan warned me that walking you into a church on christmas day with no idea what was happening sounds more like a hostage situation than a wedding and-” Sans was still babbling, so you kissed him again.

“I w-want to marry you on Christmas.” You told him, practically glowing, “I w-want you more than I’ve ever w-wanted anything in this world. M-marry me on Christmas D-day Sans.”

Sans gave you a smile so warm it seemed to banish the winter around you, “babe, i’d marry you every day as long as it meant i could see your face the next day.”

~

“So your lame party starts at four, and this is how you're getting ready? Baking? Aren't there people you could hire for this?” Flowey groused as you and Frisk moved around the kitchen. You three were alone for the afternoon, until the party started.

 **It’s just for the people who work at the embassy and their guests,** Frisk signed, **So we’re doing potluck catering.**

 **Mom made pies last night, now Frisk and I are going to make so many cookies it’ll be ridiculous!** You said with a triumphant grin.

“Somebody’s in a good mood.” Flowey grumbled

You shot Flowey an unrepentant grin, **Will you be my flower child, Flowey? Frisk could pull you down the aisle in a wagon, and you could toss flower petals with your leaves?**

“You are a depraved human being,” Flowey announced, then glanced away, “... and only if someone makes my pot look nice.”

You beamed at the flower.

Since everyone had been in on your surprise wedding, but you, there had only been a few decisions to make once you got home to your family. The setup of the wedding was going to be an most interesting mix of human and monster, since Frisk had apparently been the only human consulted for human wedding traditions.

Frisk was going to be the ringbearer, Undyne your best man, Ryan was going to walk you down the aisle and Papyrus was going to walk Sans down the aisle where they would trade siblings before Papyrus took his spot as Sans’s best man and Ryan joined Alphys and Undyne as your wedding party. Asgore was going to actually be the one to marry you to Sans, which was an interesting thought since the first time you were going to be meeting the King of Monsters would be tonight at the Christmas Eve Party, and Toriel would lead you and Sans away to Bond in a room with Frisk, Undyne, Alphys, Ryan, and Papyrus in attendance to make sure nothing went awry.

And Flowey would be part of the wedding and bonding party, of course.

 **I’m so excited for Sans and Papyrus to be my brothers!** Frisk said, hugging you and smearing flour across your shirt.

**I thought they were already your brothers, Frisky Business?**

**It’s different,** Frisk shook his head, **You’re my sibling, we have the same mom and everything! So when you marry Sans, he and Papyrus will really be my brothers instead of being brotherly to me…**

“Because I’m chopped lettuce.” Flowey grumbled.

“You’ll always be our brother Azzy,” Chara promised, picking the flower pot up to hug the pouting plant.

You grinned at them and grabbed a hot pad to retrieve a batch of cookies from the oven.

Glass shattered and you found yourself on the floor, head pounding and vision swimming.

“We got them!” A triumphant voice shouted, “The Ambassador and the Target! Boss is going to be super proud.”

You looked up to see seven people crowding the kitchen, all wearing black. One of the people over you was holding a baseball bat, which you were fairly certain was responsible for the sudden ringing in your ears.

Looking away from the bat toting person, you met the stormy grey eyes of Jonathon Sates and your stomach dropped.

“Hey buddy, hold on tight, we’ve just got to get you wrapped up and-”

You jerked your head to Frisk, being held with Flowey by a person you’d never seen. One red eye and one brown met yours with unashamed panic.

“Th-the embassy,” You choked out, raising a hand, “F-focus Frisk! Get help! And R-remember, no Resets.”

A window opened around the man holding Frisk and Flowey. Frisk squirmed viciously, biting the hand holding them and sprinting into the window. The last you saw of your little sibling was the shattered look they gave you as they dashed into the darkness. A moment late, before anyone could think of following, you closed the window and silently prayed that you hadn’t just locked Frisk and Flowey away in The Void.

“Shit.” Sates hissed, “Get the restraints. Dammit! We were so close!”

“T-touch me and you’ll r-regret it!” You growled, pulling yourself unsteadily to your feet using the oven, “Ever w-wanted to be a statue? H-human t-to c-concrete isn’t h-hard.”

Sates rolled his eyes and the person nearest you pulled a thin black blanket out of a pouch on their hip.

You raised a hand, preparing to Trade them for a statue of themselves, but they were slightly quicker, wrapping you tightly in the black material and gripping you firmly.

You froze instantly and the world spun.

It was like losing a sense you hadn’t even realized you had. Your magic, your connection to The Void, everything disappeared. Your legs gave out under you, and suddenly the only support you had was the person holding you wrapped in the blanket. Your head reeled with vertigo.

“We need to move, now.” Sates said from a million miles away, “Before that kid gets the teleporting skeleton. One of two isn’t a complete failure, and you know what a benefit they’ll be if we do things right.”

You tried to squirm, to fight, as you were picked up, but everything was too

~~Bright~~

~~Dark~~

~~Loud~~

~~Quiet~~

~~Full~~

~~Empty~~

~~Weak~~

~~Strong~~

You wanted to throw up, you might have thrown up, but you couldn't focus enough to be sure and then a rag was over your mouth and you turned eyes that refused to focus on Sates's smiling face.

“Sleep tight, buddy, we’ll see you on the other side.” His smile was going to haunt your dreams for the rest of your life.

As blackness crept unwillingly through your mind you were struck with the realization that you were most likely going to be killed by Purity for Above.

You wished for Sans as the world faded away


	21. Mother Knows Best

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some of your memories of the previous timeline start to come together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, a small change. Instead of the ~ to break scenes up, we're going to be getting short scenes of how readers friends are reacting to everything.  
> (Sorry for how late/early in the AM this came out. Moving is the worst, and I have to go through it all again at the end of the month)  
> (Although thank all the gods that I only have to move within the city instead of from one state to the other at the end of this.)  
> (For warnings about late chapters, random bits, or to ask me questions directly you can find me at sincidentsans.tumble.com )

_The moment Frisk appeared in the embassy, pale, shaking, and clutching Flowey, Sans felt his soul drop._

_He didn’t listen to Flowey yelling for someone to do something, yelling what had happened, he took a few staggering steps towards Frisk, who shook their head._

_“Go, Please,” Chara begged, “We were in The Void for so long, Sans.”_

_Sans went. He appeared in Toriel’s kitchen to smoke billowing from the oven where a batch of your favorite chocolate cookies were burning, glass all over the floor, and a broken window, but no sign of you or whoever had taken you._

_He didn’t register the glass digging into his knee caps. All he could think was that, despite everything, he had managed to lose you again._

_~_

Someone was humming, and running their hands through your hair. It was nice, considering how hard your head was pounding. The voice was too feminine to be Sans or Papyrus, Undyne was much more likely to wake you up by shaking you, and Alphys tended to let Sans wake you up. Frisk almost always woke up after you, so by process of elimination...

 **Mom?** You signed sleepily, opening your eyes and expecting to see Toriel smiling down at you.

It wasn’t Toriel. It was a human woman. A very familiar human woman.

“Hello sweetheart,” Smiled the woman. Her name was Barbara, she was either in her late forties, or early fifties, and the last time you’d seen her, she and your father had been dropping you off to live in a house all by yourself.

You felt yourself go stiff.

“No, no, don’t be like that.” Barbara chided gently, “I know you’re a little upset with your father and I, but we’ve come to realize we were wrong when we thought you were a failure. You were just as successful as your brother, just in a different way.” She smiled at you, “Now, of course, your brother is being difficult, but it’s okay. He’ll be right as rain as soon as we’re all a family again.”

You stared up at her in abject disbelief. You had no idea where you were, and you couldn’t remember how you’d gotten there, and on the list of things you didn’t want to wake up to, this situation was very quickly making it’s way up to the top.

“Do you want to speak with your father?” Barbara asked curiously, “He’s still fairly upset about the company you’ve been keeping lately, but you know him. He’ll forget all about his little tiff when we start exploring your powers.”

“How… d-did y-you…?”

Barbara raised an eyebrow, “How did we…? Know? It would be pretty difficult to miss after all the trouble you caused our men in November. Did you do something to make them disobey orders? Because after the first time I’m certain Jonathan told them they were supposed to stay away from you, but they couldn’t seem to stop coming after you. Something like that will be very useful when we’ve figured out how you control it.”

You shook your head and sat up, trying to ignore how it made your head swim. You were wearing an odd set of black clothing that you were fairly certain you’d never seen before in your life.

Then you noticed the room.

Or, rather, the cell.

You were in a room bisected by a row of bars just as black as the clothes you were wearing. In fact, the black bars seemed to be embedded in the ceiling, the floor, and the others walls.

“The room?” Barbara noticed what you were looking at, “I’m sorry sweetheart, but we didn’t know what mood you’d wake up in, and we couldn’t have you acting out when you woke up. I remember how you were as a child.” She said this with pride, as though your mother remembering that you didn’t like to wake up was a huge achievement.

“Where… am I?”

“We’ll tell you exactly where you are as soon as we’re certain you’ll work with us sweetie.” Barbara promised, “It’s just a little iffy right now, so you have to stay in the monster room.”

The what room?

Something in your expression must have tipped her off to your thoughts because Barbara beamed at you and gestured like a game show hostess showing off a prize, “The monster room, isn’t it perfect? It blocks out magic, you see. It gives the wretched creatures enough access to live until we can put them other uses, but they can’t use it at all in here. You’re in here just so you don’t open any unfortunate windows.”

Like a bucket of ice water dumped on your head, you remembered what had happened. Baking with Frisk, the attack, sending Frisk and Flower into The Void.

Purity for Above.

Your mother was working with Purity for Above. Your mother had sent Purity for Above to kidnap you.

_“D-did you ever love me?” You asked tiredly._

_Barbara gave you a sad smile and ran a hand through your hair, “Before you were a failure, I did.”_

_“You n-never acted like you l-loved me.”_

_“When the experiments failed… w_ _e wanted to love you, you just made it so hard with your nonsense. The invisible man who spoke in hands, refusing to tell us where you picked up on bad habits. I suppose it’s better in the end, your death will do so much more to further our cause than your life did.”_

Your mother was in Purity for Above. She and your Father had started, funded, and run the terrorist organization, and it had been on their orders that you were killed originally.

You wished you could connect to The Void, in that moment you wanted nothing more than to Trade this woman away for something, anything, but your connection to The Void was thin and tenuous. At least it was there, though, the total absence in Toriel’s kitchen had been… oddly scarring.

You placed your hands in your lap and leveled an icy glare at Barbara.

Her mouth twisted into a grimace, and suddenly the sweet mother was brushed away, like sand obscuring a picture. She was replaced by the woman who had put forth the minimum effort to raise you, the scientist and the politician.

“I had hoped we could do this the easy way.” She stood and straightened her skirt, “But you never have been an easy child to deal with. Would it kill you to put forth an effort to actually work with your family?”

Your glare didn’t give in the slightest.

“Are those monsters really worth so much more to you? Do you even know what they did to our family?” Barbara demanded.

Your glare lessened slightly into a frown.

As far as you were aware, your mother and father hadn’t been impacted in the slightest by the monsters. In fact, much of the research Alphys had introduced had helped with things like clean energy, which your parents had been pushing for years.

Light entered Barbara’s eyes, “Of course you don’t, we never told you.” And like that the mother was back and Babara knelt in front of you, taking your resisting hands in hers, “Oh my child, you’ve been a sheep among lions. Lions that have murdered sheep just like you. You’ve been lead astray and you didn’t even know it.”

You stared at her in frank disbelief. Was this her typical recruiting pitch?

“You and Ryan were always close as children. Our family has a history of that, siblings who love each other dearly. When my grandfather was just a child, his beloved older sibling went missing. He was desperate, searched for weeks, but there was no sign of his sibling anywhere. Time passed, he was a child, he didn't keep track of how long, but one day a terrible monster came down from Mt. Ebbott, bearing the body of his beloved sibling. It was awful for him, it was obvious that his sibling suffered so much pain before they were murdered. The people in the town were, understandably, enraged, and attacked and the whole time this monster yelled about stealing their souls, before taking my grandfather’s sibling’s body and returning to the mountain. It didn’t even let our family bury their body.”

You stared at her numbly. You had heard this story before, but not from this point of view.

“My grandfather swore that he would get revenge for his sibling. He raised my father knowing that it was his duty, our family’s duty to see the monsters dead for what they’d done, because only evil would kill a child and then taunt their family with their body.” Barbara was beseeching, trying to get you to understand a story that she only had half of, “My father raised my sister and I with the same knowledge of what our duty was, but my sister… my poor sweet sister, who never wanted anything except to dance, she couldn’t believe that any creature could truly be evil. She went to the mountain, and we never heard from her again. My father and I knew that, just like my grandfather’s sibling Chara, she was taken by the monsters. We still searched, for years, but there was no trace of her.” Barbara’s expression went bitter, “I know those things said that human children fell into the underground and died, but I knew the truth. My father knew the truth. They killed those children, they killed my sister just like they killed Chara.”

You shook your head “N-no, Chara ch-chose- They p-poisoned themself a-and-”

“Is that what they told you?” She asked flatly, “That a child poisoned themself? To what end? No, sweetheart, you know the truth. They killed Chara, they killed my sister, and when they got what they wanted from you they would have killed you, too.”

You shook your head, unsure how exactly you could explain that it wasn’t any of the monsters that told you how Chara died, but Chara themself. All the monsters thought Chara’s death had been accidental, and now they were being hunted, hurt, and killed by the family of the person who had tried their hardest to save them.

Barbara sighed and stood, “You’ll come to understand.” She stood and, before you could think to follow her, she opened the door in the bars, stepped out, closed it, and locked it with a loud ‘click’. She stopped at a small CD player you hadn’t noticed previously and pressed Play before leaving.

A quiet tune filled the room and you frowned, not sure what the purpose behind any of this could be.

Then the voice started.

‘I will listen to my mother. My mother knows what is best for me. My mother understands me. I will obey my mother.’ And repeated.

You stared at the CD player uncomprehendingly as the words repeated themselves over and over again.

You lost track of time, just staring at the CD player, listening to the soft music and the words.

You missed Toriel.

_~_

_“They killed the police that were watching the house.” Undyne said grimly, “They had the window down. Two headshots and the humans were down two officers.”_

_“Why, Undyne?” Toriel asked, hands shaking. They were in Undyne and Alphys’s house, Toriel’s entire house smelt like smoke and she hadn’t even begun to consider cleaning the glass from the broken window yet, “Why did they take my child?”_

_Undyne grit her teeth and looked away, “We don’t know. They were… involved in some fighting incidents recently, but… this was personal. Frisk said they came for the both of them specifically. I’m sorry, Toriel.”_

_Toriel turned tired eyes outside, “We’ve known them for such a short time, Undyne but… they’ve become so important to us… today was supposed to be such a happy day, and now it has nothing for us but heartbreak.”_

_~_

“Hello.”

The cheerful voice broke you from your melancholy thoughts, and you turned to see Jonathan Sates approaching cheerfully with a tray of food.

You didn’t respond.

“Oh don’t be like that,” He sighed, “You’re mad at me, I know, but I have just as much reason to be mad at you. I thought we were guaranteed a success on that mission and now the boss is going to be riding me on it.”

You didn’t respond, but frowned as he unloaded the tray and slipped what looked like a bowl of soup, a hunk of bread, and a glass of water through the bars.

“Whole tray doesn’t fit, and we know better than to let you out just yet.” He said cheerfully, then sat outside the bars and waited.

You didn’t move, but glared at him slightly.

“We’re friends, you know.” He informed you, “Or we were. Will be? I’m not too great with how this works, and I don’t have the memories first hand, but I think I know the most about that previous timeline than anyone else.”

Your mouth went dry and your eyes went wide.

“Oh yeah, we know about that little bit of magic.” Sates snorted, “It’d be great if we could figure out who did it, and how. Useful thing, that, could have used it to turn back the clock a bit and wrap you in the Anti-Magic cloth before the kid escaped.”

“Who…? How?”

“Dunno how, but you must have realized someone else came back with you?” He raised his eyebrows, “Think about it, from what I’ve been told we were a mess last time. Sure we killed people and ruffled some feather, knocked over some big buildings, but we’ve done so much _more_ this time. We’re a threat now, more than we ever were then.” He beamed at you, “And it’s all thanks to you! You’re the common variable, the deciding factor. We’d never have gotten anything like Anti-Magic cloth, or any of our anti-magic materials the first go around. I’ve talked about it, though. The future, or alternate future. Did you know we used to spend hours talking about monsters? You with your determination that they were good and didn’t deserve what we were doing, my lack of caring. It was a real shame we had to kill you then, but this time we won’t have too, so we can be real friends.”

You scowled at him, a little light headed from the thought that someone else had come back with Sans and Frisk.

The thought that, that person had immediately put their knowledge of what was to come towards hurting your friends.

“Wh-what make you think I’d b-be friends with you? E-ever?” You snapped.

Sates nodded to the CD player, “Your mom seems to think she can get you to listen to her, but we’ve got a couple of back up ideas to make you more… amenable to working with us. There’s one that we won’t let me bring until we’ve tried a couple of others. ‘Too traumatic’ or something, but I’m certain if any of them works, it’ll be that one.”

You looked at the CD player, still repeating its litany of ‘I will listen to my mother. My mother knows what is best for me. My mother understands me. I will obey my mother.’ In the background.

They were trying to brainwash you.

They were trying to brainwash you into listening to Barbara.

Unbidden a tired smile stole across your face. You hadn’t thought of Barbara once since the CD player had been turned on, you’d been thinking of Toriel.

They could try this method of making you turn on your friends all they wanted, it was only going to further cement your loyalty to your real family, and if they had no intentions of killing you, then you’d get out. You could figure this out.

“They we go, you look much better when you’re smiling. Eat whenever you want, I’ll be back later to talk with you, I miss our chats… or the idea of our chats, I suppose.” Sates waved at you and walked out.

‘I will listen to my mother. My mother knows what is best for me. My mother understands me. I will obey my mother.’

You snorted. Yeah, you would obey your mom. Toriel really only wanted what was best for you, and what was best for you was definitely not joining up with a group of terrorists that wanted to destroy everything you loved.

_~_

_“FRISK?” Papyrus knelt next to Frisk, who was sitting on Undyne’s porch, in the snow, “ARE YOU… HOW ARE YOU DOING?”_

_Frisk didn’t respond for a moment._

**_Papyrus… if you knew of a way you could fix things, like getting _____ back… but it had consequences, like everyone forgetting _____, but they’d be safe, would you do it?_ **

_Papyrus frowned, “I… I DO NOT KNOW. I THINK I WOULD BE VERY SAD TO FORGET OUR SIBLING. WOULD THEY REMEMBER ME?”_

**_Sometimes._ **

_Papyrus thought about it, “SO, THEY WOULD REMEMBER ME, BUT I WOULD NOT REMEMBER THEM? THAT DOES NOT SEEM LIKE A THING _____ WOULD LIKE. IT IS NOT A THING I WOULD LIKE.”_

_Frisk nodded and sighed,_ **_Yeah. I don’t think they would like it much either._ **

_“DO YOU KNOW OF SUCH A SOLUTIONS, FRISK?” Papyrus asked curiously._

_Frisk shook their head mutely._

_~_

Sates had come and gone again. You had refused to look at him or respond in any way, just staring at your black striped ceiling silently.

So, with the exception of the voice telling you to listen to your mother, you were entirely alone with your thoughts.

Unless you were very lucky, there was no help coming from the outside. You had asked Sans, one Thursday, how his teleporting powers worked, wondering why he hadn’t simply teleported to you in the previous timeline to find you.

_“i can only go places i’ve been before. you know how humans shed skin cells, so there’s technically a little bit of there anywhere they’ve ever been? monsters do something similar with magic, except we don’t shed magic or anything so much as we… i don’t know, get a taste of where we are with magic? it’s weird. anyway, i can only teleport somewhere i’ve been before. the more i’ve been there, the easier it is to get there again.”_

So Sans couldn’t appear at your side.

You glanced at the black stripes on your ceiling again and reconsidered. He wouldn't be able to get to you even if he could teleport to a person instead of a place.

This anti-magic material messed everything up.

You weren’t even sure if Gaster could get to you, and the thought made you just a bit panicky.

The door opened.

“Hey, geez it’s late. I’m sorry, you’d be surprised how hard it was to get away. Can you believe that obnoxious skeleton thought I’d be in danger of being kidnapped? The nerve, am I right? I give the guy all the reason in the world to think I’m safe and he still thinks he needs to babysit me. He’s pretty torn up that he can’t find you, though. It’s a real mess out there.”

Very slowly you turned horrified eyes on the person who’d just walked into the room.

Smiling at you just as brightly as he had in Toriel’s kitchen, was Ryan.

“Aw, come on, what’s that look for?” He teased, “You remember the last timeline, don’t you?”

_“If you keep this up, they’re really going to kill you!” Ryan pleaded._

**_If I was anyone else, would you hesitate?_ **

 

_“Tell me about something you love?” Ryan leaned against the wall across from where you were imprisoned._

_“...” You didn’t respond, staring at the ground._

_“What about your job? Did you like that? Before all this?”_

_“I… I l-love the l-library. It was m-my… my safe haven…” You admitted._

_“I wish… I wish I could have found you there, instead of here… like this.” Ryan said wistfully._

_“I… I wish you c-could have, too… Ryan…”_

_“This isn’t fair. I looked for so long, it can’t end like this.”_

 

_“You know, I actually really hate Sans.” Ryan told you with a frown._

**_You’ve never met him._ **

_“It’s his fault you’re like this. If you hadn’t met him, you would have joined us. If you hadn’t dated him you never would have caught anyone’s attention… I just want you to be safe.”_

_You snorted,_ **_That’s going well._ **

Ryan frowned slightly as you remembered.

“Did… Did you not come back with all your memories? I thought that since our powers are based off the same general thing you would have preserved your memories the same way.” His expression darkened, “Was it because you died? You don't have to worry about that again. Mom and Dad aren’t in charge here, anymore. They still sit in the figurehead positions, but I’ve been running the show ever since we came back, promise. You won’t be hurt while I’m here to protect you, you won’t die again.”

This was a nightmare.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> At last the big bad is revealed.


	22. O Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Brainwashing you to listen to your mom doesn't work when your mom isn't part of the terrorist organization. Three weeks pass, and your choices are shown to have a consequence.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this chapter and the next chapter are going to be just sections of story taking place through a sort of timeskip, because otherwise this story would definitely drag on far too long, and really there's only so much I could write about Reader in a cell before it got redundant

_You’d been missing for a week._

_The police were still quite hopeful for your recovery and return._

_They had stopped using the word ‘safe’ after the first three days._

_Sans sat in Toriel’s kitchen with Frisk, both totally silent as they watched the clock roll over from 11:59 to 12:00._

_**Happy New Year.** Frisk signed cheerlessly.  
_

_“you promised you wouldn’t reset.” Sans said quietly._

_Frisk nodded,_ **_Three times._ **

_Sans closed his eyes and nodded, “okay. we just… we just have to find them is all. no reason to reset, no reason to think about it.”_

**_I’m sorry Sans._ **

_Sans nodded again and they both pretended not to see the blue tears making trails down his cheekbones, “i know kiddo, i know.”_

_~_

“I didn’t realize anyone else had come back at first,” Ryan confided.

You hadn’t spoken to him the first time he’d visited you, and after the second day he’d stopped talking. This was the first thing he’d said in a week, despite coming back to visit you every day.

You glanced at him, but otherwise didn’t respond.

“I had to solidify my hold on Purity for Above before I could come get you, it took me a little while to convince everyone that a change in leadership was necessary,” Ryan smiled softly and shook his head, “Mom and Dad aren’t the best leaders, but they do have quite a bit of charisma. I guess that’s what’s always made them decent politicians. I did watch, though, I was hoping I’d be able to step in before you got too close to the monsters again. Four years, I had finally settled everything and was about to step in, stop you on your way to work when you tripped right over the ambassador,” Ryan gave a long, drawn out sigh, “And then the rest showed up. It was like my nightmares repeating themselves again. There was a simple way to resolve the issue- drive them away. I sent Jonathan out to kill the big skeleton, but well… you know how that turned out.”

You turned away, disgust surging in your stomach, “Papyrus.” You hissed.

“Excuse me?”

“Papyrus. His n-name is Papyrus.” You scowled at him, “You w-work with Sans. You should know that b-by now.”

“You can sign if you want, I know it makes you more comfortable.” Ryan advised, “And, yes, I know his name. It would be hard not to know with how much Sans talks about his brother. ‘Papyrus is so great. Papyrus is the best brother. Papyrus, Papyrus, Papyrus,’, it’s… well, it’s actually very annoying, but I do understand where he’s coming from. Younger siblings are the best and it’s hard not to boast about them.” He shot you a soft smile.

It hurt.

“Anyway, I realized when you picked up so quickly with them that you, at least, had to remember the previous timeline. You’d never been one to trust strangers easily, I assume Sans knows as well, considering how fast your relationship moved.” He gave you a measuring look.

You glanced down at your empty hand, reminded with a pang that you should be married by now, you should be waking up to Sans’s smiling face, not alone in a cell trapped by the people who were born your family.

Ryan studied you, and sighed, “I was hoping you would be in a better mood but… I guess this could be a reward for talking to me at all after a week.” Ryan reached into his pocket and held his hand through the gap in the bars, offering you a small object.

Your heart lept into your throat, it was your cellphone.

“Don’t get too excited, we disabled your ability to send calls, texts, or go online. It’s basically good for nothing but music and pictures now.” Ryan warned as you took it from him greedily.

To be fair, you hadn’t expected him to hand you a working phone, but as you flipped it on you were met by Sans’s sleeping face. The first picture you’d ever taken of him, sleeping on your couch, was your home screen and the sight of him was simultaneously a balm on your hurting soul and a painful reminder of what you were missing.

“I don’t want to hurt you, but I guess it’s kind of inevitable now,” Ryan sounded genuinely upset and you looked up from Sans’s sleeping face to see Ryan watching you. “I’m sorry, I know you don’t really get it, but we’re doing this for your own good.” Ryan looked down at the CD player, which had been your constant companion for the week, unceasing in its litany of motherly guidance, “Personally, I don’t think this is going to work. Mom wasn’t the greatest mother to you, and there isn’t a lot for this to latch onto.” He sighed and shook his head, “Just consider it, sib. I don’t want you in the spotlight, in the thick of things. Your abilities would be useful, yes, but I just want you safe.”

**I was safe with Sans.**

Ryan scowled, “Yeah? That worked out real well last time. You died, in case you forgot. Where was he when I sent Sates after you and Frisk? I was at the embassy when Frisk showed up, he didn’t even rush after you immediately, he just stood there. The kid had to actually speak up, beg him to go look for you, before he did anything. You don’t deserve hesitation. You deserve immediate action, someone who really cares.” Ryan took a deep breath and relaxed, “You should talk to Jonathan more when he comes in, he’s a good man.”

**He’s killed people. He killed me.**

Ryan’s eyes tightened slightly, “Yes, he regretted it, too. Then and now. He knows better, I’ve worked with him. You were very nearly friends in the other timeline, and now he holds your safety to the utmost importance, I made sure of it. You should have seen how devastated he was when he realized it was you he hurt with that rock, or when he found out his men had been going after you despite his direct orders. He would be good for you, I made sure of it.”

Your jaw dropped slightly, **Did you actually brainwash a man into… having a crush on me?**

“It wasn’t so much brainwashing,” Ryan protested, “The abilities The Void gave me were different than what they gave you. It was simply… a patient transition from his former loyalties to focus on you.”

You stared at him with disbelief, your phone clutched to your chest.

“I don’t know everything about your powers, but I can tell you a little something about mine,” Ryan winked conspiratorially, “As near as I can tell, they’re based on the phrase ‘Good things come to those who wait’. Everything I make is a work of patience, it took me two years to draw the correct material from The Void to only devour magic and block its usage, even now I can only draw out a tiny bit at a time, more if I drain the magics from monsters.” Ryan noticed you backing as far from the bars he resided on as you could and sought to reassure you, “I’d never draw on your magic, that would be painful for you, and I promise I’d never hurt you. This room was originally built just to hold monsters, but we’ve set that to the side while you’re here. You’re the priority over even my research, I promise.” Ryan gave you a smile that was meant to be reassuring, but only hurt you more.

 **You can’t do that Ryan, you can’t brainwash people into being some sort of boyfriend bodyguard amalgamation. You can’t take magic from monsters, they’re made from magic it would hurt them so much…** You clutched your phone to your chest tighter, trying desperately not to think about how many monsters had been in this cell before you, how many monsters didn’t come home to their families and just sat here being drained of their life essence until they turned into dust so that your brother could draw a physical manifestation of The Void into the real world.

“They don’t matter, _____, don’t you see that?” Ryan asked with a sigh, “They’re just… animals. They have their uses, but they don’t need rights and they should definitely not be intermingling with humans like that are. Don’t you understand the dangerous positions they put you in just by being around you? And Sans put you in even more danger by _dating_ you! What if you fell asleep next to him one night, and he had a nightmare? He could rip your soul out and utterly destroy you before you even woke up over a bad dream!”

 **He wouldn’t! I’ve seen Sans have nightmares before, they hurt him! They don’t make him hurt others!** You signed furiously. You knew that there was actually quite a lot Sans could do to hurt you. He had confided in you once, after a particularly bad nightmare, that monsters could take and absorb human souls, but that King Asgore had made it a law for monsters not to talk about it or attempt it. It was information that had fallen out of human knowledge and lore. Sans had dreamed that your soul had been stolen and he had been forced to just watch it happen, his half awake frantic promises that he would never let it happen had been what had prompted him to explain the law to you. **Sans would never let anything happen to my soul.**

Ryan shook his head, “If there’s one monster I hate, it’s Sans.” He said bitterly, “He’s corrupted you, put you in danger, he’s the one monster I hate more than anything else.”

 **I love him.** You signed deliberately, **I love him, I’ll _always_ love him, and there’s nothing you can ever do to make me not love him.**

Ryan watched you with sad eyes and shook his head, “We’ll figure something out,” He promised, “I’d rather not go with our more extreme plans, but… well, we will if we have to.” He stood from his chair and pulled it well away from the bars, where you couldn't reach it and turned to leave, then hesitated, “Love you little sib,” He said, glancing over his shoulder at you.

You didn’t respond and his face fell. He left you.

You looked down at the phone in your hands and opened your photos, relieved when it looked like none of them had been deleted. You drowned out the sounds of matriarchal loyalty with the memory of laughter shared with your friends as you looked at their smiling faces.

_~_

_“Sans?”_

_Sans paused at the entrance to the embassy and looked back at Ryan slowly, “yeah?”_

_Ryan shifted guiltily, “I… I’m sorry for how I reacted earlier. I don’t really think it’s your fault that they went missing. I know you’re spending as much time as you can looking for them.”_

_Sans looked away, eyes going dark. He’d been spending pretty much every night searching for you, teleporting to where he’d left off the previous night. He’d covered most of the city by now._

_“I uhm, I had an idea.” Ryan pulled a small hand recorder out, “Do you think you could get the others to record some messages for them? Just… as much as they can? I want to take a bunch of messages of hope and have them broadcast on the radio. Just in case they can hear it.”_

_Sans considered and took the recorder, “sure. That’s… that’s a nice idea.”_

_Ryan nodded and placed a hand on Sans’s shoulder, “They’ll be fine Sans,” He promised, “I know it.”_

_~_

“Sweetheart?” You slid your phone under your bed quickly as Barbara poked her head in the door. This was the first time you’d seen her since you’d woken up to her, “How are you doing?”

You rolled your eyes.

“I brought a friend along, he’s going to run a few tests for us to see how well you're taking to things.” Barbara opened the door and was followed in by Dr. K, “Your father would be here, too, but he’s being stubborn. You know how he gets, but as soon as you see reason we’ll bring him in and you two can have your reunion.”

“Hey Kiddo,” Dr. K said brightly, “It’s Thursday at ten, I told you I’d leave the time open for you!”

You gave him an incredulous look. Dr. K was a therapist, he had monster patients.

 **You’re a piece of shit!** You signed furiously, **How many monsters have you messed up because of your stupid prejudices?!**

A squirt of water hit you in the face. Dr. K was holding a spray bottle and was looking at you with disappointment, “Kid, I’ve told you time and time again. You don’t need to use your hands, your voice works just fine.”

 **Fuck You.** You signed pointedly, Dr. K sprayed you again, like a wayward pet.

“Barbara, why don’t you try asking _____ to use their voice?” He sighed.

“Sweetheart, mother would like you to use your words and not your hands.” Barbara said, expression eager.

 **_Mom never tells me to talk. She heard Chara once, but even then she’s never said a word about signing._ ** _Frisk told you one late night,_ **_In my… before I fell into the underground my guardians would get really frustrated with my signing. They didn’t understand it very well._ **

_“You are my child, and I am happy with any way you desire to communicate,” Toriel said from behind you, startling you, “Now I believe it’s very late for both of my children.”_

**My mom doesn’t care how I communicate.** You signed deliberately.

“What did they say?” Barbara glanced at Dr. K, “They should have listened a little by now, right?”

Dr. K was watching you oddly, “Kiddo, why didn’t you listen to your mom? She only wants what’s best for you.”

You didn’t want any misunderstandings here, “I d-did listen t-to my mom. T-toriel just wants me to be h-happy.”

“Toriel?” Barbara’s face twisted, “That monster? The Goat? That is not your mother! I am your mother! I gave birth to you, I raised you, I-”

“Gaster r-raised me!” You shot back, “Y-you stopped caring. You h-haven’t been my mom in a l-long time.”

“Gaster doesn’t exist! He was a figment of your imagination.” Barbara kicked the CD player and blessed silence fell, “You said this would work!”

“It would have, but it seems like they got to the kid before we could.” Dr. K said solemnly, “I’m sorry Barbara, we’re going to have to do some reverse brainwashing before this method will be effective.”

“Forget it. I don’t want them. Ryan wanted to be a happy family, but they’re just as much of a disappointment as they’ve always been, he can have them.” Barbara said in frustration, “Come on, Doctor, this is pointless. I’m putting a rush on Jonathan’s idea. It will make me feel better, and I'm sure it will work better than this rubbish.”

You watched in silence as Barbara stormed out the door. Dr. K watched you for a second, “That really was a mistake, kid. You should just accept your family, it would make things easier for you.”

You raised your middle finger to him. He squirted you in the face again, and then left.

_~_

_“Hey, Sans!” Undyne called as Sans walked past her house, “Get in here!”_

_“not tonight undyne.” Sans tried to dismiss her, but froze as a glowing blue spear landed in front of him._

_“I’m serious Sans, get in here, you’re making things needlessly complicated!” Undyne yelled, “I’ve been trying to get your attention for a week now and you keep ignoring me!”_

_Regret prickled down Sans’s spine and so, with a sigh, he followed Undyne inside._

_And froze at what he saw._

_David waved to him from Undyne’s couch where he was on the phone, “Yeah, yeah the guy has grey eyes and dark hair, the person they’re with would probably be really quiet or fidgeting with their hands,” He was saying into the phone._

_Alphys had seemingly pulled her entire computer system down and was working with a human woman Sans recognized as Emma from the library. They were apparently using google maps and traffic cameras to make a live feed of the entire city._

_Papyrus was bouncing around between them and, depending on what David said or Alphys told him, he tossed a small blob of colored clay to Flowey, who was in front of a big board covered in maps._

_“You’ve been doing a lot of footwork, we’ve seen you on the traffic cameras, but you’re not the only person who lost them, Sans. We’ve got Ryan reaching out to some scientist friends of his in nearby towns.” Undyne said quietly, “It’d be easier if you’d work with us instead of working alone.”_

_Sans nodded slowly, unable to express what he was thinking._

_“Alright, awesome. Go tell Paps and the flower where you’ve been so they can update the board.”_

_Sans smiled slowly, they were going to find you, all of them were._

_It filled him with Determination._

_~_

Sates was giving you a pitying look when he rolled a television set into the room.

 **Are we in elementary school? Is it time for Bill Nye?** You signed sarcastically.

“I think I understood about half of those signs this time. I’m getting better,” Sates smiled sadly, “Unfortunately this isn’t going to be any fun for either of us.”

You frowned warily at his tone and sat up slowly. Sates pulled a piece of paper out of his pocket and turned the TV on.

Alphys was on the screen, arms secured to the wall by anti-magic shackles.

“The Live-stream is on.” Sates said, you glanced at him and saw he was talking into a small microphone.

“We read you loud and clear Captain Sates.” Said a different voice, “Is the prisoner watching?”

“Confirmed.” Sates said grimly.

“Then we will begin removing the ties the prisoner has to the enemy.”

“N-no,” You whispered in dawning realization.

“Monster Designated as Alphys the scientist, do you have anything you'd like to say? Specifically anything directed towards _____?” The facelss voice asked

“Wh-what? O-oh, uhm… W-we love you _____, and we’re going to see you, soon okay? Stay Determined!” Something about Alphys words seemed off, but you couldn't figure out what it was, couldn’t push past the panic clawing at your chest. She looked so small against the wall in her lab coat, and the camera was just a touch too far away for you to be able to see her face properly, to even begin to guess what she was thinking.

“S-sates please, tell them t-to stop! D-don’t do it! I’ll cooperate, I’ll w-work with you, L-let Alphys go!” You pleaded.

“I’m sorry, but this is over my head.” Sates apologized, “It was determined that the only way to really tie you to us would be to remove your ties elsewhere.”

“Sates- Jonathan, please. I’ll d-do anything, sh-she’s married, she h-has a life. She’s a p-person, don’t!” You stumbled towards the bars and hit your knees, holding one hand out to him in a desperate plea.

Sates shook his head, “Subject has acknowledged the message.” He reported with more regret than you'd ever seen on his face before.

The screen went black. For a moment you were left in total silence, and you couldn’t tear your eyes away. Your heart pounded in your ears like a drum. The screen flickered back on.

A large diagonal cross ran across Alphys’s chest, cutting through her lab coat and through her skin.

“O-oh,” Alphys whispered.

Then she fell apart into a small pile of dust.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (That Happy Ending Tag still applies, promise)


	23. It's a Cold and Broken Hallelujah

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get angry, plans are made, and you make a Trade.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Right, well. Unless I do an epilogue, this is the third to last chapter. I had a choice to split this chapter up into two parts and having two smaller chapters, or cutting a few scenes and releasing a larger than normal chapter.  
> Well, many pages later here we are.  
> Remember I appreciate every comment and kudos I get so much!  
> And for random bits, warnings on updates, and to ask me questions directly, you can reach me at sincidentsans.tumblr.com

You weren’t sure how long you stayed on the ground, eyes unfocused and thinking.

You didn’t want to believe Alphys was dead. Not Alphys, who understood better than anyone else what it was like when your words got stuck in your throat and your tongue rebelled against what your mind was trying to say, who had been the one to explain magic to you, who you never got tired of discussing anime with you, who…

Who never would have sounded like that in a room of strangers.

You frowned.

Alphys didn’t like talking in front of people, even to give a message to you she wouldn't have sounded so calm.

Especially not in that position.

A ball of icy rage formed in your gut.

Those assholes. Those complete and utter bastards had made an animation of one of your friends dying, and then had made you watch it, had tried to pass it off as reality.

Your stunned expression morphed into a vicious glare aimed at the door.

You didn’t care what it took, you were going to rip your way out of here by brute force if you had to.

Then you would show them what happened to people who threatened your friends and family.

Taking a deep breath to force a modicum of calm upon yourself, you turned your back to the door, leaned against the bars, and closed your eyes.

All it would take was the most tenuous connection to The Void to allow you to start trading.

_~_

_Papyrus was watching Ryan guiltily. He really hadn’t put a ton of effort into liking your brother when you were around, but watching him now, seeing how your disappearance was affecting him, he was feeling really bad about it._

_“HUMAN?”_

_Ryan glanced up, his eyes tired and a flicker of surprise flashed across his face, “Oh, Papyrus. Hey.”_

_“HUMAN, I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WISH TO ASSURE YOU THAT WE WILL MOST DEFINITELY FIND _____.” Papyrus promised, “YOU WILL NOT NEED TO WORRY ABOUT YOUR SIBLING FOREVER.”_

_Ryan tilted his head slightly, and couldn't seem to suppress a smile, “Uh, thanks. If the Great Papyrus says so, it’s got to be true, right?”_

_“INDEED IT IS, HUMAN!” Papyrus promised._

_Ryan considered him for a moment, “Actually Papyrus, there’s something you could do for me that would help me stop worrying about them a little bit…”_

_“I WOULD BE HAPPY TO ASSIST IN ANY WAY I-”_

_“PAPYRUS! YOU ABSOLUTELY DID NOT LEAVE FLOWEY ALONE IN A ROOM FULL OF SECURITY PROTOCOLS!” Undyne bellowed._

_“OOPS,” Papyrus winced slightly and glanced at Ryan, “AH…”_

_“It’s okay Papyrus, too many people would notice if you disappeared with me.” Ryan waved him off, “Go make sure Flowey didn’t destroy anything important?”_

_“I WILL DO MY BEST TO ASSIST YOU LATER, HUMAN.” Papyrus promised._

_He turned and jogged over to the security offices and missed the grin that crossed Ryan’s face._

_“Don’t worry my friend, you already are.” Ryan murmured._

_~_

You had barely moved in a week. You were pressing, stretching your magical hand towards the nothingness that was simultaneously the source of your power and your current predicament.

Despite trying a week straight, you’d only managed to barely wiggle past the curtain blocking you from The Void, enabling you to hear it’s whispers, but not really make out what it was saying.

~~A Trade~~

Excitement surged through you making contact at last.

'Yes, how do I make a Trade in here?'

~~Only One Trade Is Possible~~

Disappointment replaced the excitement and you almost lost the tenuous connection.

~~To be free of the effects of The Void, outside of The Void. The Ability to return The Void to whence it came.~~

Hope returned, that sounded like Ryan's Anti-Magic material wouldn't affect you anymore, that you could banish it even?

~~Yes~~

Oops, you hadn't meant that to be a question to The Void.

'What do I need to Trade to be free'

~~A life. One Which loves you. One life which trusts you.~~

You snapped the tenuous connection like you'd been burned, jumping away from the bars of your cell like distance from them would distance you from what you had heard.

You were saved from having to think too much on the price demanded of you by Sates wheeling in the TV you'd seen Alphys die on last week. Your stomach churned with tension as you eyed it. Alphys's death had been fake, staged with motion capture or something similar, but Purity for Above were not friends to monsters and you wouldn't put it past them to actually kill one of your friends.

"I would like to preface this by saying that I don't approve," Sates stated firmly. You looked at him oddly, and noticed he did seem oddly agitated, "This was supposed to be the last resort to convincing you, but it has been... pushed through to our second choice."

You frowned, "Why d-do you oppose it?" You asked curiously.

"Because it's causing you unnecessary pain." Sates said flatly, then glanced away, "I am not unaware of what Ryan has done to me, he saw it as a fitting punishment that someone who considered you a friend, but killed you, should be dedicated entirely to your protection and well being. Loyalty to you second only in loyalty to him. I have to say in his position I may have done the same. Regardless of whether my feelings are my own or whether they are what I have been conditioned to feel, I do not think you should have to watch this."

"I thought th-this was y-your idea?" You frowned slightly.

"It was a suggestion as a last resort, not the second thing we should have jumped to," Sates shook his head and flipped the TV on, pulled his little microphone out, and gave you one last regretful look before speaking into it, "The stream is live."

It was Undyne this time.

There were no amateurish video tricks involving distance here, Undyne was clearly rendered and scowling ferociously at the camera.

You bit your lip and looked at Undyne critically, trying to find something, anything that indicated this wasn't real, that like Alphys, Undyne was safe.

"Monster known as Undyne do you have anything you wish to say to _____?" Asked the same voice as last time.

Undyne's face lit up and you grew just a little bit frantic looking for a discrepancy.

"_____? HELL YEAH I HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY! DON'T YOU WORRY NERD, WE'RE GONNA FIND YOU AND THEN WE'RE GOING TO KICK THE ASSES OF THE JERKS THAT TOOK YOU. DON'T YOU WORRY ABOUT A THING!"

Unlike Alphys, Undyne wasn't restrained to the wall, and the camera didn't go black. A woman approached Undyne from the side, and Undyne turned to regard her curiously.

And got a knife in her stomach.

Undyne fell to her knees, eyes wide, grasping the knife, but your attention was pulled elsewhere.

Now that Undyne had moved away from the wall some, you could see there were no shadows visible anywhere. Neither the woman, nor Undyne had shadows, and the light was coming from behind the camera, which meant their shadows should be on the wall behind them.

You rested your head against the bars as the animation of Undyne faded to dust. You were sure it wasn't real, but it was still upsetting to watch.

You nearly jumped as a hand was placed on your shoulder, and you looked up into the concerned face of Jonathan Sates.

"Are you okay?"

**_You can’t brainwash someone into having a crush on me!_ **

~~A life. One Which loves you. One life which trusts you.~~

You glanced at the TV screen again, and made a decision.

"N-not really... W-would you, uhm, come t-talk to me after y-you take that out?" You asked softly.

His face lit up and he nodded, "I'd be happy to!" He assured you.

You tried not to feel too much like garbage, and used the twin images of Undyne and Alphys turning to dust to fuel your Determination.

_~_

_"you're looking pretty pensive, buddy." Sans said quietly, leaning against the wall next to Ryan and glancing out across the Embassy front lawn._

_"Just been thinking." Ryan gave Sans a strained smile._

_"i get that," Sans said amicably, rubbing at his eye sockets, "i'm just headed out to keep searching, myself."_

_"Good," Ryan sighed, "That's good. The sooner this is taken care of the better."_

_Sans frowned, "yeah, bud i definitely agree."_

_Ryan looked down at Sans thoughtfully, "Say you have a fractured arm, and it's healing a little wrong. You see a doctor who tells you that it's alright it's healing wrong because he doesn't want you to be in more pain, but another doctor says that you should just break the arm entirely and reset it so it'll heal correctly, which would you do?"_

_Sans blinked in confusion and glanced at Ryan oddly for the strange turn in conversation, "uh, i guess i'd go for the break? better to have a little pain and be better for it in the long run, i guess."_

_Ryan sighed and nodded, "Yeah. Yeah you're right. Thanks Sans."_

_"sure buddy," Sans shook his head slightly, pulled away from the wall, and start walking._

_Ryan watched him go with hooded eyes._

_"One more try," He murmured, "Then we'll go for a clean break."_

_~_

"-and when we went back for our gear, we found that the Marines had up and marched off with it," Jonathan -he's not your friend, not for real, you have to remind yourself frequently- grinned as he recounted an army story.

 **What then?**  You signed slowly so he could see it. Jonathan wasn't great with sign language, but he liked practicing with you. You could tell it made him feel like you were opening up to him.

"Well what else? We had to march after them." He shook his head, "Those Marines are real characters, we found them with our stuff loaded in a truck and they handed us the keys and laughed it off."

You grinned at him. Over the past week you'd made a point to just sit and talk with Jonathan, letting him tell you stories and helping him learn sign language. If he wasn't part of a terrorist organization dedicated to murdering and destroying the rights of your family, it would have been easy to be his friend for real.

As it was, you only felt guilty most of them time over your decision to Trade him to The Void for the ability to be unaffected by Anti-Magic, as opposed to constantly feeling guilty. It would be easier if he were a bigger asshole.

Like Ryan, who maintained that he was doing all of this, and he was including showing you videos of your family dying, for your own good.

"Hey... _____?"

You looked Jonathan in the eye and gave him an encouraging smile.

"We were friends in the other timeline, right?"

_"Wake up Traitor," Jonathan bounced into the room, "We've got questions for you about the embassy!"_

You smiled and nodded, and some of the guilt faded away at the memory of the previous timeline when Jonathan hadn't been brainwashed to be your protector.

"I'm glad, even though I did end up killing you, I'm glad we got a second chance." Jonathan admitted, leaning against the bars. You leaned against him.

"This is something I'm happy to see."

You scowled as Ryan walked in the room, beaming at you both.

"Sir," Jonathan stood and saluted.

"Down, Jon. I'm glad you're getting along with my little sib, that was the plan after all." Ryan shot you a proud grin and you resisted the urge to growl at him. There was progress to be made and Ryan was making it difficult. "I do need to talk with them though, a sibling heart to heart if you will."

"Of course, sir." Jonathan nodded and glanced back at you, "I'll... be back later?" He asked hopefully.

You forced the scowl to fade away and smiled at him as you nodded. He brightened visibly.

Ryan watched you with a soft look in his eyes, "I'm glad you're opening up to another human, Jonathan specifically will be good for you."

 **I don't have a lot of options to chose from around here**. You shot back instantly.

Ryan sighed painfully, "I know you're still angry about being here, but it's just until I'm certain you'll stay out of trouble. Stay safe."

 **I was safe where I was**. You insisted.

"Really? That little fight club and the necessary police escort everywhere was safe?" Ryan raised an eyebrow.

 **The police escort was because you had an identified murderer watching me through my window**. You pointed out, **Jonathan's nice and all, but he was** **_staring through my window at night_** **. It was terrifying**.

Ryan shrugged, "It accomplished what I was trying for, for the most part."

 **And what were you trying to do?** You demanded.

"I was trying to get you and Frisk alone so that we could grab you both at the same time." Ryan said casually, "Obviously we failed, and even more galling Frisk has been surrounded by monsters ever since, but the plan itself succeeded."

 **We weren't alone, we had a police escort**. You pointed out.

Ryan rolled his eyes, "A police escort my guys took out in .05 seconds because they were relaxing with their windows down."

You opened your mouth to retort, then frowned, and glared at Ryan, **What do you even want with Frisk?**

"Same thing I want with you, for different reasons." Ryan shrugged, "If I can make Frisk realize how dangerous it is for them to be around monsters, it'll be a big step. Having their ambassador admitting their unsafe would be a big step backwards for them, and a huge step forward for Purity for Above."

You swallowed back the bitterness in your mouth and leveled a glare at him, **Why did you want to talk to me exactly?**

"I don't want to break you." Ryan said flatly, "I really don't. There's another live stream with one of your friends organized next week, but I would absolutely prefer to send you and Jonathan to a safe house where you can stay safely far away from any danger."

 **Jonathan, too?** You signed slowly.

"Well, his duty is to you." Ryan grew a little eager, "I would of course keep him near you, no extra assignments, no murder, just two normal people having a normal relationship."

 **But of course I can't ever contact my family again**.

Ryan's smile grew strained, "They aren't your family, sib, I am. Jonathan could be, too, if you'd let him."

 **No.** You signed flatly, **My family wouldn't lock me up and show me videos of the people I love being murdered**.

Ryan observed you for a moment, and sighed, "Someday you'll understand the length's I'll go to, to keep you safe." He said mournfully.

You made a rude gesture at him, and Ryan snorted.

"Love you, too, little sib," He said softly as he left, "Love you too."

No amount of righteous anger could soothe the sting of betrayal you felt.

_~_

_"Undyne... it's been six weeks." Alphys said softly, watching Sans on the cameras._

_"Yeah." Undyne said tightly, "It has."_

_Alphys pulled down her glasses and rubbed her eyes, "Why... why h-haven't we received a r-ransom? D-demands? Anything?" She asked shakily, "Why j-just silence? We have the m-messages on the r-radio, r-reminders on the news and online... How c-can no one have s-seen them?"_

_"We'll get them back, babe." Undyne promised, "They're holding on wherever they are, I'm sure of it. They're tough, remember? They'll probably be kicking ass when we find them."_

_"Frisk is s-so quiet..." Alphys murmured, still scrubbing at her eyes, "So quiet and s-still. T-toriel w-won't let them out of h-her sight... When w-was the l-last t-time you and P-papyrus practiced? When w-was the l-last time S-sans slept? W-what if they... what if they..."_

_"Hey!" Undyne picked Alphys up and hugged her tightly, "You can't give up! You have to keep hoping! We'll all be back together before you know it!"_

_Alphys nodded, "Y-yeah. You're right. S-sorry, I just..." She gestured at her computer, "I f-feel useless. I-in the underground I c-could see everything, b-but it's s-so big up here..."_

_"When we get _____ back, they can use their amazing librarian powers to help you set up a worldwide camera system!" Undyne decided, "It'll be the best spy network in the world!"_

_Alphys sniffed and nodded enthusiastically, "Y-yeah! Absolutely but... But do librarians really have s-super spy powers?"_

_Undyne looked down at her thoughtfully, then grinned, "They will in the Manga, _____ will love it for sure."_

_~_

You were more than a little surprised when Jonathan came storming into your room and immediately parked himself by the cell and held a hand out to you.

"Take it," He urged gently, "It's... You're going to want to hurt something, and it might as well be me."

You stared at him in honest shock as a man you’d never seen before wheeled in the familiar TV screen. He flipped the screen on and spoke into the mike, “Stream is live.”

You took Jonathan’s hand.

Papyrus, in much higher definition than Alphys or even Undyne had been, was looking at you from the screen cheerfully. He had a shadow. He looked so real he could have stepped from the screen to scoop you into a hug.

“HELLO HUMAN!” He waved cheerily, “I HAVE BEEN LEAD TO BELIEVE YOU WILL HEAR THIS MESSAGE!”

You were frantically looking for any sign that this was a fake, that Purity for Above hadn’t lured Papyrus to his death of the pretense of giving you a message.

“I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WISH TO ASSURE YOU THAT ALL WILL BE WELL,” Even his expressions were spot on. If this Papyrus was a fake, then someone had spent a lot of time watching the skeleton either up close or on a camera, “SANS IS LOOKING FOR YOU EVERY NIGHT, AND ALPHYS AND UNDYNE HAVE ORGANIZED A CRACK TEAM OF HUMANS AND MONSTERS WHO LOVE YOU TO FIND YOU.” Papyrus’s expression softened, “WE MISS YOU QUITE A LOT, ALL OF US. I PROMISE- What?” Papyrus looked away from the screen and the shot panned out to reveal Ryan walking towards him with a friendly expression.

“Papyrus, no!” You reached for the screen.

“HELLO RYAN, I WAS JUST FINISHING MY MESSAGE FOR _____!” Papyrus said, his grin returning.

“That’s good, Papyrus. I just needed to send them a message myself.” Ryan assured Papyrus, and without hesitation ripped a knife across Papyrus’s body.

Papyrus looked down at himself in shock, “O-OH…” He said softly and slowly faded into a pile of dust.

Distantly you realized you were crushing Jonathan’s hand, but he hadn’t made any move to make you let go.

‘Not real. Not Real, Not Real, notrealnotrealnotreal.’ You chanted mentally, ‘They got better is all. Synthesized audio, motion capture, good animation, it’s not real. Papyrus is fine. Undyne is fine. Alphys is fine.’

“Get out of here.” Jonathan snapped at the new guy, who shrugged and took the screen away. As best as he could, Jonathan pulled you to the bars and wrapped his arms around you.

It felt wrong. Jonathan was almost a foot taller than you, and all made of muscle. It almost hurt how much you wanted bony arms to settle around you, and pull you in close. Safe.

They’d seriously threatened to kill Papyrus, and for that you were going to escape and you wouldn't have Mercy while you did it.

If they’d actually killed Papyrus?

You’d murder everyone that ever spoke up against monsters in revenge

~

_“Sans!”_

_Sans glanced over his shoulder at Ryan and frowned slightly, “bud, what the hell are you doing out here? I thought you lived sort of near the embassy?”_

_“I’m renting an apartment near there,” Ryan confirmed, “But I needed to talk to you. Alphys said you’d headed this way, but they don’t have the cameras set up here yet. I’ve been looking for you for, like, an hour now.”_

_“sounds like you’ve got something serious to talk about.” Sans frowned, “what’s up?”_

_Ryan reached into a pocket and held out a small pure black ball, “I found this in _____’s house,” He said excitedly, “It’s not made of anything a normal human could get a hold of, I was wondering if you recognized it?”_

_Sans carefully took the ball curiously. The moment it touched his bones it expanded and cocooned him._

_“what the hell?!” Sans swore, feebly struggling to get free. The material made his head swim and his bones ache._

_“Oh good, it worked just like I’d hoped it would.” Ryan said, all pretenses of friendliness falling away, “Well ‘bud’, I’d say nothing personal, but it actually is.”_

_Sans stared uncomprehendingly at Ryan, “i don’t… what?”_

_“Don’t worry your empty little head about it Sansy,” Ryan said cheerfully, picking Sans up and tossing him over one shoulder, “It’s not going to be important tomorrow anyway. Just sleep, bud.”_

_Sans kept trying to struggle, but whatever the little ball had been made of sapped his strength and as the material spread through his bones and over his skull he couldn’t fight the darkness pulling at him._

_“I’m the best big brother ever,” Ryan said firmly to himself, “I’ll give them a chance to say goodbye, and then make a clean break.”_

_~_

You were close, you knew it. Jonathan was almost constantly in the room your cell was in, talking to you, bringing you books, just wanting to be near you.

You didn’t know if he trusted you, but you were fairly certain that between Ryan’s brainwashing and your own actions he was at least somewhat in love with you.

You’d mostly lost track of time, to be honest. Other than being able to tell the difference between day and night, there was no way to tell how many days...weeks? You had been in this cell. You weren’t sure how long it took to make someone fall in love with you naturally, but Ryan had helped ensure your own destruction by giving you someone to work with.

To be completely honest, though, it was only by remembering Papyrus’s quiet ‘Oh’ that had kept up your resolve to Trade Jonathan for the ability to be free. In another life, where monsters didn’t exist, he would have been your friend.

“Hey,” Jonathan said softly, “Thinking deep thoughts?”

You blinked, then smiled at him and nodded, “L-lost in my own h-head.” You admitted.

“Jonathan!” A muffled call came from behind the door, “Are you in there Jon? Do me a favor and open the door, my hands are full.”

You fought the scowl from your face at the sound of Ryan’s voice and stood with Jonathan, even though you couldn't walk with him to the door. Jonathan opened the door wide for Ryan, who walked in with a black wrapped figure on his shoulder.

“You would not believe how heavy this gets after a long walk,” Ryan said breathily, depositing the figure on the floor, “Hey sib!”

You didn’t look at Ryan, but inspected the figure he had dropped. It was definitely wrapped entirely in Anti-Magic material, you could almost feel it from the cell, much more concentrated than the stuff your bars were made from, but it was impossible to discern what kind of monster he had trapped in there they were wrapped so thoroughly.

“So,” Ryan stretched, “Tomorrow is Valentine's Day. I figured I’d give you a special kind of gift.”

You stared at him uncomprehendingly, **You… kidnapped a monster as a Valentine’s Day gift for me?**

“No, well yes, sort of.” Ryan laughed quietly, “I had a conversation a few weeks back that I’ve been thinking of. The live streams, seeing the death of those monsters, has fractured you a little bit, like a bone, and Jonathan has been an excellent brace but you’re still not healing properly. So I’ve decided that I don’t really have a choice anymore. I have to break you completely so you can heal cleanly.”

Your heartbeat picked up, **You aren’t making sense Ryan.**

“I’m going to make you free on Valentine’s Day,” Ryan said proudly, leaning over and tugging some of the material from the monster’s face, “I’m going to free you from your old life, so you can start your new life.”

You stared down at Sans face, his eyes open but hazy and out of focus, in absolute horror.

“Ryan… you can’t… Y-you’re hurting him! What is that s-stuff? It’s not- You can’t-” You wished there was something in your cell to throw at the smiling scientist. There was no way you could tell them that Sans only had one HP, how delicate he was in the wrong situation.

Who knew what being cut off from his magic would do to him?

“It’s fine.” Ryan brushed it off, “I’m going to kill him tomorrow, so it’s not like he needs to be in perfect shape. As long as he’s alive when the camera starts rolling, that’s what’s important.”

“Don’t.” You pressed yourself against the bars, wishing Sans was closer so you could reach him, could tear away the black bindings, “I’ll b-be good Ryan. I’ll d-do w-what you s-say. Anything. Don’t.”

Ryan ruffled your hair, “Sorry Sib, even if I believed you Sans has got to go. He’ll never stop looking for you, and you won’t be safe as long as he’s looking for you.”

“I’ll kill you,” You swore softly, “I’ll destroy everything.”

Ryan laughed softly, “You’ve got a lot of spirit, sib, but that’s part of what needs to break. Part of what will break tomorrow.” He hoisted Sans back up on his shoulder with a quiet grunt, “You’ll see him again tomorrow. On the livestream.” He promised and walked out the door, catching it with his foot and slamming it closed behind him.

You stared blankly at the door.

“_____?”

Very slowly you turned to look at Jonathan. He was watching you sadly.

“I’m sorry for what Ryan is doing.”

You stepped away from the bars, still looking at Jonathan.

“I need a hug.” You said softly, all hesitation melting away in the face of Sans’s imminent death.

“Come here,” Jonathan stepped up to the bars.

You shook your head, “No, a r-real hug. Come in the cell?”

Jonathan frowned slightly.

“I’ll g-go to the corner and w-won’t step towards the door,” You promised, “Trust me?” This was the crucial moment and you searched Jonathan’s face with a genuine plea in your eyes.

“Okay,” Jonathan said softly, “Okay, I trust you.”

He pulled his keys out and unlocked the door to your cell. True to your word you stepped back into the corner and waited for him to come to you.

When he wrapped you in his arms, unobstructed by the cell bars for the first time, you reached for The Void, “Jonathan, do you love me?” You asked softly.

He held you tighter, “I… I think I do. Is that okay? I know… I know it’ll be hard for you to forgive Ryan, but I really do think I love you, and he really thinks this is what’s best for you, that I’m what’s best for you.”

“Thank you,” You told him with a small sigh, “For loving me. And for trusting me. Goodbye Jonathan.”

Without giving him anytime to register what you’d said you Traded Jonathan to The Void.

For a moment reality pitched, and then you were alone in your cell, and the energy you’d been missing for weeks was singing in your veins again.

You glanced at the wall behind you, watching as your magic projecting an image of Jonathan’s shocked face for a moment before he was engulfed by black. An image of you replaced him, your eyes pitch black and empty of feeling, black racing along your veins, and then the images faded.

You turned your attention to the cell bars and reached for them. As your hands skimmed them, they melted away, returning to The Void where they belonged without any prompting from you.

You walked through the bars, letting them fade away behind you, and opened the door to an empty hallway.

“I’m coming Sans.” You murmured to yourself, feeling The Void singing in your veins.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter will actually be out Saturday, Thursday's update will be a One Shot prequel to break up all the dark stuff that's been happening. I'm fully aware I'm leaving it on a cliffhanger but that is the evil of who I am.


	24. They Send You Away, You Probably Shouldn't be so Mean

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You get Angry. You make a Trade that leaves you different. You are rescued at last.  
> People die.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, first of all there's something you should know about this chapter.  
> This is the chapter that literally started it all. I wrote this chapter originally as it's own little one off self indulgent story with one of my OCs that originally wasn't going to do anything but sit on my computer for me to read when I got the urge.  
> But I got curious. What was my OC doing in the place they were in, why did Gaster care, and how did the OC meet sans in the first place.  
> That's where this story came from.  
> This chapter has gone through a /lot/ of edits since then (I still have the original tucked safely away) but I wanted you to know that pretty much everything that happens in this chapter has been planned since before the story even started properly, just so you are warned.  
> The songs I listened to while doing the final edits on this were Control and Castle by Halsey, so I highly recommend them to get the feel I was sort of going for here.

_~~~~“As the challenged you get the first turn, it’s hard to overpower the rule of First Attack, and I personally have never seen it happen.”_

_~_

You didn’t have time for the niceties of a traditional encounter. The first person you happened across you allowed The Void to reach through you and suppress his turn.

“What is this?”

~~Garrett LV 4 HP-32 ATK-16 DEF-10~~

~~He feels The Void approaching~~

“Where is Sans?” You demanded.

“I don’t know who that is!” Garrett protested, leveling a gun at you, “But I’m fairly certain you aren’t allowed out!”

You raised an eyebrow and suppressed Garrett's turn again, freezing the gun, “The skeleton R-ryan brought in. Where is he?”

~~You could find out for a Trade~~

The Void whispered to you.

You tilted your head at Garrett thoughtfully, then Traded him without another word.

You felt your EXP and LV increase, then a nearly invisible trail of black flickered into your vision.

You were so intent on the trail to Sans you didn’t hear one of the members of Purity of Above coming up behind you until the pistol went off and ripped through your shoulder.

You turned to see the spitting image of the woman who had killed Undyne on the livestream and ripped a window to The Void open under her. She fell, and dispassionately you closed it.

Your EXP increased again.

When you looked back to the trail, you were not alone.

 **A human will not survive long in The Void, they are not like the inanimate objects you store in there my little one.** Gaster told you, eyes soft.

“Good.” You bit your lip, The Void was lurking just under your skin, stealing most of the pain from the gunshot wound, but you could still feel it throbbing, and there was blood trickling down your shoulder now, pooling at the tips of your fingers, “These are not good people, Gaster.”

Gaster came closer and hovered one hand against your face for a moment, before smiling, **I understand. Do what you have to, I will be right beside you from now on.**

You nodded to him, relief burning through The Void, and began your hunt. It was apparently late, because you did not see many more people walking around. Each person you saw ended up in The Void, the cameras mounted on the walls as well. You couldn't bring yourself to care about the people who followed your brother with such sincere hatred of the best beings you’d ever met.

You’d give one hundred of these people for any one of your friends.

The black trail eventually vanished in front of a door that was a floor above yours. The building you were in was a cross between an office building, and a warehouse. Tons of smaller offices surrounded by huge open rooms.

You would be more than willing to sink it all into the ground once you had Sans safely out.

 **Wait,** Gaster cautioned, stepping ahead of you, **Let me see how many people are in there.**

You shifted hesitantly, then nodded.

Gaster stepped through the door.

The Void was still taking the majority of the pain from your arm, but it ached abominably and after bleeding across two floors and a flight of stairs you were starting to feel a little light headed.

 **There are three people in there,** Gaster stepped out of the door, looking very worried, **Sans is not… he does not look good.**

You grit your teeth, forcing yourself to focus through the light headedness and flung the door opened.

Two of the people standing around Sans ignored you, the third turned around, his eyebrows furrowing, a question on his lips.

They all screamed as they fell into The Void.

Your energy surged, The Void yelling words you didn’t understand in your head, and you had to grab the doorway to steady yourself, pressing your other hand to your forehead and smearing blood across your face.

Everything went quiet again after a second, and you looked up into Gaster’s worried expression, and then beyond him to Sans.

Your fiance was leaned against the wall, still covered in the Anti-Magic Void conjured material. The Void whispered in your ears.

~~Sans the Skeleton, HP-0.6 ATK-0 DEF-0~~

You staggered across the room and reached for Sans, the anti-magic material melting away, back into The Void, as you neared it. Sans’s eyes were still hazy, but as the black material faded away he managed to focus on you.

“h-hey, i thought this was a nightmare. what are you doing here?” He breathed softly.

You gathered Sans in your arms and held him tight, “B-being your knight. I c-called dibs on Princess Sans, r-remember?”

“thought i was going to rescue you this time.” Sans snorted slightly, “wh-what’s the plan?”

You chewed on the inside of your cheek. You couldn't carry Sans out of here, you didn’t need anyone to tell you that you were losing blood too fast to consider that a possible area of escape. The lights of Sans’s eyes were focusing and unfocusing on your face, and you knew better than to think he’d be able to focus enough to do any magic, or even walk.

Gaster caught your attention from the corner of your vision.

 **There is a closet, empty except for some boxes over here.** He signed, pointing to the closet, **If you can call for help, you could hide in here until it came.**

You reached into Sans’s pockets.

“is this really the time?” Sans seemed just as, if not more unsteady than you.

“Your phone.” You pulled it out, relieved, “We can call Alphys…”

Your heart squeezed slightly and you looked down at Sans, “We c-can call Alphys? Or Undyne? Or Papyrus? They’re… alright?”

Sans nodded and closed his eyes for a second, “they were when i… uh… ya know.” He didn’t open his eyes, but his chest kept moving with the breaths he took and his HP didn’t waver.

You stood shakily, your arms wrapped under Sans’s arms and around his chest, and pulled him towards the closet Gaster had pointed out. Sans’s jacket absorbed most of the blood dribbling down your arm, thankfully cutting off the slightly obvious trail you’d made on your way to Sans.

~~You are dying.~~

You ignored the unwanted whisper and pulled Sans into the closet, making sure there was no blood on the door to give your location away, before pulling Sans to the farthest corner of the closet and collapsing next to him, doing your very best to obscure him from the door on the off chance someone opened it and saw you.

~~You  will die.~~

You turned Sans phone on, thankful beyond words that monster batteries lasted so much longer than human batteries, even wrapped in Anti-Magic Void material.

~~You could Trade the blood in your veins. You could Trade the beat of your heart.~~

Even if you hadn’t memorized the number you were calling, it was the first one in Sans’s contact list by virtue of the Alphabet.

One Ring.

~~Trade them for Void. You would be More than Human.~~

Two Rings.

~~More than Monster~~

Three Rings.

~~You could Live.~~

“Sans?! Wh-where are you? We’ve been w-worried sick-”

“Alphys, can you track Sans’s phone?”

Sudden silence met your question, and you glanced at the phone, praying you hadn’t lost service.

“_____?”

“Yes Alphys, can you track Sans’s phone?”

“I already am. D-do you know where you are at all? Wh-what’s happening? Is Sans w-with you?”

“I’m with Purity for Above, Sans is here he… we… It’s b-been…” You couldn’t find the words. You were so happy to hear Alphys was alive, irrefutable proof that she really was alive.

“We’re c-coming _____.”

You could hear a commotion in the background and suddenly there was a different voice on the line.

“Nerd! Is it really you?!”

“Undyne,” Your voice broke, “Hi.”

“Alphys has stuff loaded on her laptop, we’re coming right now. Shit, here, I’m going to hand you off so I can tell Asgore and he can get all the right authorities. Stay on the phone, okay?” You could still hear Undyne as she moved away from the phone, and wanted to protest, until a new voice appeared.

“My child? Is it truly you?”

“Mom,” Tears spilled down your cheeks, “I’m here mom.”

“Oh my child,” Toriel’s voice cracked, “We have been so worried about you, I was beginning to think we may… we may never see you again.”

 ~~They will never see you again. You will die before they arrive~~. ~~~~

You didn't need the whisper from The Void, you were having to blink hard every few seconds to keep your eyes in focus, and the hands you clung to the phone with were starting to go numb.

“Mom, I’m… I’m not sure you will, I’m bleeding kinda badly,” You admitted quietly, “B-but I’m so glad t-to hear your voice again.”

“No!” Toriel’s voice was sharp, “Do not-Hold on _____, stay with us!”

_‘I will listen to my mother. My mother knows what is best for me. My mother understands me. I will obey my mother.’_

“I’ll t-try.” You promised.

“My child, oh my child,” You wished Toriel wouldn’t cry dizzily, “Please hold on, do whatever you have to, but stay with us.”

~~Listen to your mother, make the Trade.~~

“Okay mom,” You whispered and silently made half the Trade. You Traded your heartbeat for The Void.

Reality screamed and twisted around you.

For a moment you couldn’t breathe, couldn't think, couldn't move.

Then your heart stopped beating.

And You Were Different.

The Void settled around you, no longer whispering. You weren’t human anymore, but you weren’t quite a monster either. You were something a step to the side of both.

Noise surged from the phone and you realized distantly that you were still holding it to your ear somehow.

“I’m here,” You murmured.

“Are you alright?” Toriel sounded panicked.

“I…” You glanced at your shoulder, a black four point star marked where you'd been shot, “I stopped the bleeding.”

“Please hold on my child, we’re coming, we’re taking Papyrus’s car, it’s the fastest. We will be there soon, my child, please.” Toriel begged.

Your head was ringing with the sudden silence, and the air around you felt simultaneously too heavy and too light.

“Is Papyrus there?” You asked softly.

“I AM HERE,” You heard the confirmation distantly, “TORIEL HAS PLACED YOU ON THE SPEAKER PHONE SO THAT WE MIGHT ALL ENCOURAGE YOU! PLEASE STAY DETERMINED.”

That settled things around you a tiny bit. Alphys, Undyne, and Papyrus were alive and well, Sans was tucked against your side.

Your family was safe.

All of a sudden you were tired, exhausted. Throwing humans into The Void, the Trades you’d made, whatever you’d done to yourself had begun to catch up to you, and it was all you could do to stay awake.

You looked up and met Gaster’s worried gaze.

“Will you sing me a lullaby?” You asked.

Gaster knelt next to you, regret on his face, **I can’t here, I’m sorry.**

Gaster wasn’t the only one who had heard you, though.

“Come my child, stay with me,” Toriel sang softly through the phone and you felt yourself relaxing against Sans, “I’ll protect you and your dreams. Rest my child, ‘neath the tree, like its branches reach for me. So let me keep you safe and warm here in my arms, think of the life that we could live, the joy that it could give. Even if we’re worlds apart, stay in my heart. Someday when you’ve a choice to make, I hope you’ll think of me. Think of me… think of me…”

You closed your eyes and the phone clattered softly to the floor.

~

You were moving. You felt safe and warm, and when you finally managed to pry your eyes open, you looked up into the worried face of Toriel.

“I’m so glad you’re awake.” She told you softly.

The sky was pink above her.

“Where…?”

“We’re just outside of that… that facility.” Toriel’s face twisted slightly, “You’re safe. Sans is safe, Papyrus has taken him back to his car, he has a lot of experience in healing his brother.”

You relaxed slightly, “Can I… Stand?”

“I am unsure. Alphys was unable to ascertain what you had done to yourself.” Toriel sounded worried, but she did set you on the ground very carefully, keeping a hold of you in case you seemed like you couldn’t support yourself.

You accepted Toriel’s help, but your legs seemed steady enough under you, and you finally looked around to see where you were.

“There is a parking lot wrapping around the whole building. Undyne, Asgore, and Alphys are over to the left handling the evacuation and arrest of everyone that was within, Papyrus is just beyond them healing Sans. I was… I needed to be away from the noise for a moment, but I couldn't leave you alone.” Toriel told you as you looked up at the building you had been confined in for weeks. The Void hummed in your veins, and you started walking slowly to the left, Toriel right beside you in case you faltered.

“Where’s Frisk?” You asked softly.

“Home. We left the old Royal Guard with them, and Alphys’s friend Mettaton so they would be well protected.” Toriel assured you.

“Good, good.” Your stomach twisted at the thought of any dredges of Purity for Above getting ahold of your little sibling.

“My child… what happened to you on the phone? You said you were bleeding but you’ve…” Toriel gave you a concerned look.

You looked down at your hands. For just a second your veins were completely visible under your skin, black mixing freely with red, and then they were gone again.

“I did… what I n-needed to... to stay alive.” You tried to explain. Toriel’s face softened and she nodded.

“I am just glad you are with us, my child.”

“Me too, Mom.” You agreed with a half smile.

“NERD!” There was no other warning before Undyne had seized you, softly for her, and spun you around, “HOLY SHIT IT’S GOOD TO SEE YOU! YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW MUCH WE MISSED YOU.”

You awkwardly hugged her back, your hands mostly trapped at your side, grinning so widely that it almost hurt.

“I m-missed you too, Undyne!” You assured her.

Undyne put you down and inspected you critically, “You don’t look too banged up, that’s good. Asgore’s handling the authorities with these guys, but I’d definitely have to step in if they’d roughed you up.”

“Yeah,” Your grin faded, “They didn’t touch me… not really…” You looked past her to where the police had gathered the members of Purity for Above and were sticking them in police cruisers and SWAT vehicles.

“Have you found Ryan?” You asked hesitantly.

Undyne looked at you in surprise, “Did they take Ryan, too? We didn’t find him in there but we’ll keep checking the cells-”

“No,” You shook your head, throat constricting at the reminder of how deeply Ryan’s betrayal ran, “No, Ryan is… He was part of Purity for Above. He w-was leading them.”

Undyne stared at you uncomprehendingly, “That… What? We just saw Ryan yesterday, he wasn’t… He can't have been... He was so worried for you...” Undyne looked at Toriel, confusion on her face.

~~Something is wrong.~~

The Void was whispering to you again, but the words weren’t coming just from inside your head, but from the pit of your stomach, being sung from your veins.

~~Something is wrong.~~

Gaster was suddenly in front of you, his face twisted in a look of panic and you were moving before he could even finish signing **RUN** to you.

You heard Toriel’s worried call from behind you, and Undyne yelling something as well, but you couldn't understand them, couldn't think of anything but the sense of  _wrong_ that had filled your mind. If you’d still had a heartbeat it would be pounding in your ear, but instead it was the thrum of The Void was getting progressively louder as you ran faster than you’d ever been capable of before and skidded around the corner of the building to the next side of the parking lot where Papyrus had taken Sans to heal him.

Ryan was standing over Papyrus, his expression open and warm, a gun held loosely in one hand.

“Hello little sib.”

Papyrus was on the ground, wrapped in the same black material that had been around Sans, the hurt and confusion in his eyes, the only part of his face visible, was more than you could bear. You could see Sans sitting in the passenger seat of Papyrus’s car and you didn’t need to use The Void to know that Papyrus hadn’t gotten a chance to heal his brother before they were attacked.

“I was a little worried you wouldn’t be the first to find me, would have been very awkward for anyone else, don’t you think?” He asked with a soft laugh, “But you didn’t disappoint me. You never have, even after destroying everything I’ve worked for I find I’m still so proud of you.”

“Let Papyrus go Ryan,” You said softly, tearing your eyes away from Papyrus and meeting Ryan’s warm gaze, “Don’t do anything you’ll regret.”

“Would I regret it?” Ryan asked curiously, “I can't imagine I would regret it naturally. Would you make me regret it?”

You clenched your fists, “I w-would make you regret it.” You promised.

Ryan’s smile changed slightly, becoming a mixture of proud and sad, “You are so strong.” He said softly, “You’ll be able to defend yourself, I think. Won’t you reconsider? We don’t need Purity for Above, you could join me and we could start a revolution. Magical humans to match monsters step for step, we were so much stronger than them once, we could be again.”

You shook your head, “I’m not g-going anywhere with you Ryan. Not now, not ever. Leave Papyrus alone, walk away. I w-won’t even tell anyone you were standing here. Leave Ryan, go far away and l-live a normal life. Don’t do this.”

Ryan glanced over at Papyrus, his smile falling away, “Again. You’re choosing monsters again. Is he a better brother than I am? I did my best for you, I was only a kid myself, you know? There wasn’t a lot I could do to stand against mom and dad.”

“This isn’t about that.” Where were Toriel and Undyne? It hadn’t felt like you ran too far, what was taking them so long to get here, to help you get Sans and Papyrus to safety. “I don’t blame you, but I ch-chose Papyrus to be my brother. I chose Toriel to be my mom. They l-loved me when they didn’t have to, when they knew I was b-broken and they c-could have just walked away. They didn’t have to stay, but they did, that’s why I chose them.”

Ryan snorted and shook his head, “They did, I guess. I took too long trying to find you. That’s my own fault… Just for you, little sib, I’ll do one more thing just for you. I won’t kill your chosen brother.”

Some of your tension eased away and you took a step towards Ryan.

He pointed the gun into Papyrus’s car.

You heard Undyne and Toriel round the corner behind you.

Sans turned his head and met your eyes, looking past the gun.

He smiled.

The gun went off.

Sans disappeared.

The world went silent.

You stared at the spot where Sans had been, waiting for him to reappear. He had seen the gun, he had to have seen the gun. He had to have teleported away to safety, and he would reappear any minute.

Gaster stood in the corner of your vision, and distantly you wondered if your expression looked anything like his, a mix of rage, horror, and disbelief.

“This is as strong as I can make you.” Ryan dropped the gun and very slowly you met his eyes.

He didn’t look proud, he didn't look happy.

He just looked like he didn't care, like it didn't matter.

The world all around you went dark, everything faded away except you and Ryan. All around you The Void hissed and whispered as you faced your brother.

As The Void Scientist faced The Void Incarnate.

Ryan’s potential was limitless. He had a thousand connections in this world, some tied to the building beside you, some tied to the people being escorted away by the police, some stretched into the distance, and a few connected to your friends.

You severed them without a word, without a conscious thought. You snapped everything that tied Ryan to this world, every piece of magic he’d done was undone, every relationship he'd fostered was torn apart, until the only pieces of Ryan that still existed were pale memories and papers bearing other people’s names. Then you took all of Ryan’s potential and all the evil he’d done, and you Traded him for a different scientist.

The last you saw of Ryan was a proud smile crossing his face and the words “Happy Valentine’s Day,” forming on his lips.

Then the world gained color again, and it was a tangible, visible Dr. W.D. Gaster standing in front of you.

People were following Toriel and Undyne around the corner of the building.

“Dr. Gaster?” You heard Toriel say from a great distance.

“Dad?” Papyrus whispered, now unbound but still on the ground.

You didn’t care about any of it.

You took shaky steps towards Papyrus’s car.

‘Why hasn’t he teleported back?’

Gaster wasn’t moving, his eyes were on you.

‘I’m going to be so annoyed at him for worrying me like this.’

Papyrus was climbing to shaky feet.

As soon as you were close enough Gaster placed a hand on your shoulder, the first contact you’d ever had with the monster that had raised you. He was pleading, asking you not to go further.

Toriel’s hand was on your other shoulder.

You shook them both off, and looked into Papyrus’s car.

Sans’s blue jacket, the jacket you’d buried your face in too many times to count, the jacket that smelled of new books and ink and uniquely of Sans, sat on the front seat, the only thing protecting a small pile of dust from the soft wind blowing through the parking lot.

Your world shattered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The lullaby Toriel sings is Adriana Figueroa's version of Home.  
> For those who wanted the sad ending, the story end here.  
> There is one more chapter to Post, and then a short epilogue.  
> We'll see you Monday.


	25. Broken Wings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is a funeral to attend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is it guys. The final chapter.  
> There is still an epilogue, but officially the story ends here.  
> It's been a windy journey, and I wouldn't have been able to make it without your support and encouragement  
> The Song that inspired this Chapter's Title is Wings from the RWBY Volume 1 Soundtrack, I highly recommend listening to it this chapter

You reached through The Void. You hadn’t stopped reaching since you’d seen the small pile of dust, since you understood what it meant. You reached and searched and demanded what-who you needed to Trade to get Sans back.

You’d gotten an answer back once, and then The Void hadn’t whispered to you since.

~~He is lost to Time.~~

Your heart no longer beat. It felt appropriate that it couldn't beat without Sans, instead magic moved your blood, and everyday you felt more and more of your humanity degrade to whatever you were becoming.

Papyrus hadn’t left your side since Sans died.

Part of you had expected him to be angry with you. It was your carelessness that got Sans killed, it was your brother by blood that pulled the trigger.

Papyrus wasn’t angry. He seemed to be just as shattered as you were, and maybe your shattered pieces fit together because you seemed to be a comfort to him. He had taken your hand and hadn’t left your side since Sans died.

You had registered, distantly, at some point, Gaster telling your story. Your childhood, your power, your escape.

His return. Ryan’s non-existence.

Toriel took you home eventually, no one attempted to separate you from Papyrus, and at this point that was the important thing.

You couldn’t think clearly, you were just searching for anyway to fix this.

You had considered, just once, asking Frisk to Reset. You had woken up next to Papyrus and found Frisk buried in your other side. You had looked down at them and considered, just for a moment, having them Reset.

You’d asked them, three times, not to Reset for you, but this wasn’t just for you. This was Sans. Sans’s smile, the way he cuddled into you on Saturday mornings after watching anime, the way Papyrus exploded in mock anger when he made a pun or a terrible joke…

The way he made you feel whole.

But.

But.

Could you ask Frisk to give up everything they’d earned? Give up Toriel, and the strides the embassy had made in monsters rights?

Even for Sans?

In the end you couldn’t ask them to do it. Couldn't ask them to set back all the progress they’d made, the relationships they had, the people they’d met.

You would destroy yourself to bring Sans back, but you couldn’t hurt Frisk like that… and a distant part of you was terrified that by Trading Gaster for Ryan you had broken the timeline, and if you asked Frisk to Reset the world might break entirely.

For a week your friends tried to draw you from your search in The Void, tried to ask you what had happened to you in your confinement.

They put off Sans’s funeral, waiting for you to wake up.

You didn’t. You woke up, you held tight to Papyrus, and you searched, begged the endless Void.

It was Alphys that brought you out of your daze.

~

“I f-found the tapes.”

You were sitting on Toriel’s couch-

_Sans pointed you over to the couch, “it’ll get a little bit crazy in here, that’s the safest spot...not that they’ll hurt you, but you wouldn’t want to get hit by anything flying by.”_

-when she spoke.

You blinked and looked up at her, focusing on the real world for the first time in a week.

“The… the ones of me, Undyne, and Papyrus?” Alphys could see the return in your eyes and plowed on, “They were… very upsetting. Did they make you watch them? We… the things that we said on them, we aired them on the radio to give you hope, but… I guess Ryan had a different use for them.”

“They told me it was real.” You said quietly, squeezing Papyrus’s hand instinctively, “That you were dying to… sever my bonds from monsterkind.”

It felt like centuries ago.

“They… They were working on one for Toriel, but I guess it was… It didn’t turn out very well.” Alphys said uncomfortably, “But you never… You didn’t hear all of the messages.”

You shook your head slightly, “I was… more focused on convincing myself you were alive… than listening.”

Papyrus was squeezing your hand now, looking down at you with a sad, soft expression.

Alphys nodded and placed a tape recorder on the edge of the couch, “There’s on I think y-you need to hear.” She told you gently.

You looked at the recorder. You didn’t want to press play, you didn’t want to hear it, didn’t want to hear anything.

Papyrus reached past you and pressed Play.

“Dr. Alphys Is Correct,” He said when you jerked to look at him, “You Need To Hear This.”

You didn’t respond, couldn't respond, because someone else was already talking.

And you could never interrupt this voice again.

“hello? am i using this thing right ryan? okay, okay i think i have the hang of it now. hey there sweetheart, it’s sans. things are looking pretty dark right now, huh?”

Your eyes were getting blurry and you reached up with your free hand to rub at them. Your hand came away soaked in tears.

“don’t give up though, alright? i’ll be there as soon as i can. this isn’t the ending we fought for, and this isn’t the ending we deserve. we’ll find a way to fix this, and then i’ll be excited to trade out the ‘fiance’ title for ‘husband’. if you can hear this, hold on to that, because that’s what i’m fighting for now. i’ll be there soon.”

You were having a hard time time breathing through your sobs and you clung to Papyrus so hard you were probably bruising yourself.

“I-it’s n-not fair.” You sobbed, burying your face in Papyrus’s scarf, “This-this isn’t th-the ending w-we fought for either! W-why did this h-happen? W-why… why…”

Papyrus pulled you into his lap and curled around you as you were fully in the real world for the first time since Sans died, and you felt your heart break.

_“yeah undyne, let’s not take any frisks with the kid.”_

_Your heart stopped._

_The skeleton had not been standing in front of you a second ago, you were fairly sure of it. He winked at you and you tried not to think too hard on how that was accomplished._

 

 _“come on, kid, they’ll_ noodle _you until you give in.” The short skeleton grinned and held out a hand, “i’m sans, by the way. sans the skeleton.”_

 

_“well… i wasn’t teasing you. i drink ketchup.” Sans said slowly._

_“Oh,” You blinked and pulled one of the bottles down, then glanced between it and Sans, “D-do you want a glass…?”_

_Sans snorted, “nah, i’m an animal. i’ll drink it straight from the bottle.”_

_You look down at the ketchup bottle, “Probably for the best,” You murmur to yourself, “I’d get jealous of the glass…”_

 

_You blinked down at him, not sure what to make of the sleepy skeleton, “I’m right here.” You assured him._

_“kay...mind if i sleep a bit longer? ‘m tired…”_

_“G-go ahead Sans, I’m right here.” You assured him, half expecting him to return to his previous position on the couch, but instead he unfurled his hands from his jacket, wrapped his arms around your waist and fell back asleep in your lap._

 

Papyrus held you as you sobbed, the heart you no longer had aching. You weren’t sure when Papyrus started crying, or when Gaster arrived, but all of a sudden your shoulder was coated in orange tears, and Gaster had gathered you both in his arms, humming softly as he tried to console you both.

“You are my sunshine’s,” He murmured gently, “My… my only sunshines…”

 

~

“Monsters spread their dust on their favorite things after death,” Gaster explained softly, kneeling in front of you, Papyrus, and Frisk.

This was a monster funeral.

You were sat in a open field of flowers below Mt. Ebott. Everyone who had known Sans, who had called him friend, was gathered here, trading soft stories, laughter, and tears.

 **You’re going to put it on _____ and Papyrus?** Frisk asked solemnly, their arms moving awkwardly around the flower pot they held.

“There were few things Sans loved like he loved them.” Gaster nodded.

‘Would his Dust be enough?’ You sent to The Void pleadingly, ‘Can i trade what once was him, for him?’

~~He is lost to Time.~~

You closed your eyes.

“_____?” You looked down to Chara, “Is there… isn’t there anything you could Trade?”

“He’s lost to Time.” You repeated the answer you’d been giving, “And my control lies in Potential. Not Time.”

Chara frowned, and in their arms Flowey looked at you like they’d never seen you before.

“So you need Determination?” He demanded.

Gaster watched you three, frowning slightly, beside you Papyrus shifted to pay better attention to what you were saying.

“I… I guess that is what… I’d need.” You agreed.

The Void hummed a partial confirmation.

“Could you take some of ours?” Chara asked slowly.

You stared blankly down at the child next to you, to your two siblings in one body and the soulless flower in their arms. All three of them met your gaze, the offer unanimous in their eyes.

You reached out to The Void and asked.

And received a response.

The Price would be heavy, oh so heavy... but if it was not the only trade you made…

You opened your eyes to The Potential in the world, and asked a question with threefold consequences.

And received a positive answer.

You let go of Papyrus’s hand and stood, offering your hand to Frisk, Chara, and Flowey.

“You’ll lose the ability to Reset.” You warned softly, “You’ll be able to learn a smaller magic, but you won’t be able to Reset if you help me.”

“My little one, what are you doing?” Gaster asked warily. You were garnering attention all around.

Frisk and Chara smiled, and took your hand. Flowey snorted and glanced away.

“Doesn’t feel right not to have the smiley trashbag around anyway.” He grumbled.

You opened a window into The Void, and with your two siblings and their Flower, you stepped through.

Once it had taken you covering Frisk, Chara, and Flowey with your soul to keep them from harm, but you had become closer to The Void since then, and it took the barest thought to keep The Void away from them within it’s own space.

You released their hand and closed the window behind you.

There was an odd shift, and suddenly Chara and Frisk were standing side by side in front of you. They exchanged a confused look, and then frowned at you. The Void you were standing in, The Void you were using, was a place of Souls and Frisk’s body held two souls.

“Chara,” You asked softly, “May I borrow your Determination?”

Chara frowned at you, “Just mine?”

“For now.” You nodded.

Chara extended a hand to you, frown still firmly in place.

You looked sort of similar, you realized. Maybe it was in the shape of your face, or the color of your hair, but now that you knew you were Chara’s family, you could see it.

“My blood,” You whispered,”From your blood.”

Chara jerked, and you took their hand.

With Time and Potential on your side, you could see exactly what you needed to Trade to bring Chara back. You had most of their soul in front of you, so it was a simple trade of your blood to bring a copy of their body, a copy of their potential from the infinite timestreams and merge their soul in it.

Your soul appeared in front of you, violet and black twined.

And it shattered.

Chara’s crimson eyes widened, even as a few shards of your soul disappeared to finalize the Trade, to make Chara’s soul whole and to tie them to their body.

“What…?” They breathed.

“I reached into The Void and asked,’If I c-could borrow Determination, could I bring Sans back?’” You explained to their horrified gaze, “And The Void Whispered back. The cost to Bring anyone b-back is Determination and a fourth of my own soul, so I asked The Void, ‘If I Trade another fourth of my Soul, and some Determination, could I bring back Chara?’”

Chara’s eyes filled with tears, “That’s not fair,” They whispered, “You didn’t asked me, you shouldn’t give up your soul for me.”

“To Trade for a monster, I need one fourth of my Soul.” You explained quietly, “For you, it was one fourth of my soul, and the blood that bound us together.”

Chara shook their head, eyeing the shattered remnants of your soul still floating between you, “That’s not fair.” They repeated.

You smiled at them, but didn’t respond. You turned to Flowey.

“Absolutely not.” Flowey said shortly, “There’s no reason to-”

“I can’t go b-back with half a soul.” You pointed out, “If I do I’ll die anyway.”

Flowey closed his mouth, beside you Frisk took Chara’s hand.

“Flowey, may I borrow your Determination?” You asked softly.

Flowey glanced away, “You’re taking away our ability to bring you back.” He said quietly.

“I made my choice.”

Yearning stole across Flowey’s face, and he glanced at Chara and Frisk, then closed his eyes.

“Okay.” He said softly.

It was slightly different to Trade Flowey, than it had been to Trade Chara. You took his Determination and found yourself dipping into countless timelines, borrowing just a touch of the dust, and a few soul fragments of the monster that had been Asriel Dreemurr, until you had enough to rebuild Flowey into Asriel.

More of your Soul disappeared, and when you blinked the flower in a pot was replaced by a goat child in a green and yellow striped shirt, tears already running down his face.

“Azzy?” Chara rasped and the two children were suddenly wrapped in each other.

You looked down at Frisk.

 **Sans won’t accept leaving you in The Void.** Frisk signed, meeting your eyes.

“There’s n-not much of a choice Frisky Business.” You said softly, “This… this is m-my choice. It’s a very selfish ch-choice.”

Frisk nodded.

“Frisk, may I borrow your Determination?” You asked with a formal finality.

Frisk looked at the shards of your soul sadly, then nodded.

Frisk’s Determination was different than Chara’s, or Flowey’s had been. It was an ocean, and you were almost overwhelmed sweeping through timelines, trying desperately to gather shards of soul fragments, and bits of dust from hundred of thousands of timelines where Sans had died.

Finally you had enough and you released Frisk’s Determination to drop back to your place in The Void.

You shakily reformed Sans with what you’d gathered, thinking of his laugh, his awful puns, his jokes, his smile, everything about him that had made your heart so full it wanted to burst.

You still had a small pile of dust, and shard of soul in your hand when another fourth of your soul disappeared, leaving a tiny pile of violet and black pieces.

“well, that was certainly unexpected.”

You launched yourself at the voice without looking up, burying your face in Sans’s shirt.

“you brought me back.”

“You d-did it to me, first.”

You could hear Asriel’s crying pick up, and judging by the positioning of the sound, Chara had joined him.

“you’re out of your mind if you think i’m leaving you alone in this place.” Sans said sternly.

You sniffed and shook your head, gesturing back at the fourth of your soul remaining, “I d-don’t have a Soul anymore Sans. Just a small piece. If I g-go back, I’ll die.”

Sans tightened his grip on you, “then i’m not going back either.”

“You’ll leave Papyrus alone?” You asked softly, “Gaster? Mom? Frisk? You h-have to go back Sans. For b-both of us.”

“dammit.” Sans tightened his grip even more, “dammit, no. we reset time to get you back, and you just-”

“I died. You didn’t.” You pulled away so you could look up at Sans, trace the familiar, beloved lines of his face, “This w-was… this was me correcting fate.”

“this isn’t right.” Sans disagreed.

“I could Trade away your memories of me?” You proposed, “It would b-be like you’d never met me-”

“don’t you dare.” Sans shook his head harshly, “never, ever, ever.”

“I’m selfish.” You admitted, “I c-can’t… I couldn’t ask Frisk to Reset, and I c-couldn’t live where you weren’t. I T-traded Chara first, because they would f-fight the hardest against me. A-against me using my soul.”

“you can’t trade you for me.” Sans clung to you, “it’s not right, after all we went through, it’s not fair.”

“I didn’t just Trade for you,” You reminded him, “I saved… I s-saved the Souls that couldn’t h-have otherwise have b-been saved.”

Asriel and Chara weren’t crying anymore. Sans eyes flickered past you for a brief moment, then back to your face, then his eyes widened and he looked past you again.

You looked, too.

Frisk had taken the small pile of Sans’s dust and left over soul fragments and turned them red with Determination, and was trying to use it to put your soul back together with Chara and Asriel.

“That won’t work.” You breathed.

“you don’t know that, and we’re not leaving until we try.” Sans shot you a grin and joined them.

You stood there for a long moment, just watching them, heart breaking for their hopeless endeavour.

“ ~~They won’t be able to put it back together, they don’t have enough material to work with.~~ ”

The new voice froze you, and you jerked your head to the side.

“ ~~Relax,~~ ” Ryan assured you, “ ~~You’re the only one who can see me or hear me. Straight across Trade for Gaster, remember? I’ve essentially taken his place within The Void.~~ ”

But Gaster had been able to touch someone in The Void before.

“ ~~I won’t touch them.~~ ” Ryan promised.

You didn’t reply, you just narrowed your eyes and clenched your jaw, you’d had more than enough of his empty promises.

Ryan looked away from you, back at Sans, Chara, Frisk, and Asriel.

 ~~“I probably wouldn’t have shot him if I'd known you’d do this.~~ ” He told you with a sigh, “ ~~I had hoped… Well, there’s a lot of strength to be gained from accepting and coming to peace with the death of a loved one. I knew that I wasn’t leaving that parking lot alive, but there was no way you would mourn me the way you needed to, to grow stronger.~~ ”

“I hate you.” You whispered.

“ ~~Maybe you do.~~ ” Ryan agreed, “ ~~But I love you, I always have, and I always will. And I’ll always protect you.~~ ”

“You failed.” You whispered sharply, “You hurt me more than anyone else.”

Ryan nodded, eyes softening, “ ~~I see that now. If it’s any consolation, I would take it back if I could.~~ ”

“It’s too late now. We’re both trapped in The Void forever.”

Ryan snorted, “ ~~I said I would always protect you, didn’t I? Stay right here, and be quiet.~~ ”

You didn't want to obey him, but he had control in The Void, too, and in this moment, exiled from existence but still possessing a whole soul, Ryan was stronger than you. He reached out towards your chest and pulled out a large black piece. The Void held you in one spot as Ryan strolled over to the people you loved, who couldn’t see him, still holding the piece of black.

“ ~~Red.~~ ” You heard him scoff, “ ~~No, red wouldn’t work to put you together again… but purple isn't a hard color to make if you have red and blue.~~ ”

Ryan’s Soul appeared, sky blue crossed with black, and just as easily as you had shattered your soul, he shattered his.

“ ~~I’m not a Saint,~~ ” He called to you, kneeling by your soul fragments and plucking out all the black pieces of The Void, “ ~~And I can’t deny that I’m curious what the outcome of this will be. I’m a scientist.~~ ” He pulled the blue pieces that were floating next to him ount, and replaced them with the black he’d taken from you, then mixed the blue shards with the determination/monster soul/monster dust mix Frisk had put together.

It turned Violet and Frisk, Chara, Asriel, and Sans exchanged shocked looks, as the violet mix and the remnants of your soul moved away from them. They all looked at you, but you were looking at Ryan.

You felt…

Empty.

There was a part of you gone, and even more, you realized, you weren’t protecting everyone anymore.

“ ~~I took The Void from you, you’ll be happier, safer without it. I can’t give you your heartbeat, or your blood back, so the best I can do is shift it ever so slightly so you’re a monster instead. Your soul will be a little more powerful than a normal monster body can take, but there should still be enough human in there to balance it out.~~ ” Ryan reformed the heart, but it was untouched by black and upside down. He offered it to you without a word.

You carefully reached out and took it, looking at him with a frown. You wondered what Sans, Frisk, Chara and Asriel saw. Were they thinking you’d done this yourself? Or could they maybe see some flicker of the man who took everything away from you, and was now trying to give some of it back?

“ ~~I know it’s too late to ask for your forgiveness.~~ ” Ryan told you with a crooked grin, “ ~~And I know you’d never ask for my blessing to marry Sans, now, but…~~ ” He glanced over his shoulder, and for a second you thought that Sans might see him, “ ~~You have it. You gave up part of your soul for him, and he turned back time for you. I still don’t… like monsters, but my precious little sibling isn’t human anymore, so if I continue hating them and loving you I’ll just be a hypocrite, and there’s no need to give myself any more unflattering descriptors.~~ ”

A window opened beneath Chara, Frisk, and Asriel, dumping them into the real world. A second later one opened under Sans and he reached for you desperately as he fell.

Ryan reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, and his face fell when his hand went right through you.

 ~~“Right. I don’t exist anymore, and you have nothing connecting you to The Void.~~ ” He said softly, then shook his head, “ ~~You have your original potential, sib. Maybe try being a healer, it would suit you better than being a killer, I think. And, if you care to, look for me sometimes. I’ll be watching.~~ ”

You opened your mouth to respond, but a window opened under you and you fell into the field of flowers that Sans’s funeral had been held in.

Was being held in.

Above you the window closed, and around you monsters gaped as two dead children, one live ambassador, one dead skeleton, and one human turned monster reappeared from the air where a mostly human, and an ambassador had disappeared from.

You didn’t have much time to process things before there was a loud yell and Papyrus had you and Sans scooped up and held tightly to his chest.

A moment later there was another pair of skeletal arms holding all three of you tightly.

“hello dad,” Sans said quietly, “hey paps.”

“Welcome back Sans,” Gaster said, his voice coming from right next to your ear, “And my little one.”

“SANS! _____! YOU’RE BOTH HERE! YOU’RE BOTH FINE!” Papyrus yelled exuberantly.

Behind him Toriel had gathered Chara, Asriel, and Frisk in her arms, and was looking at you with tears running down her face, soaking her fur.

“Yeah.” You said softly, returning Papyrus and Gaster’s hug with one arm, lacing your fingers with Sans’s with the other, “We’re all here... we’re okay.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There you are. The Happy ending we've been looking for so hard.  
> In the traditional Fairytale style, this last chapter would be 'And they all lived'  
> The Eplilogue would be 'Happily Ever After'  
> So we'll see you on Wednesday for the happily every after.


	26. Epilogue: I'll come back if you call me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which you finally get the ending you were fighting for.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here it is guys the last chapter.  
> I'm sort of considering doing a one-shot with a bunch of 'deleted scenes' but other than that Sunshine is over.  
> It's been a real pleasure writing (and re-writing, and re-writing, and sometimes re-writing, and editing) this and I appreciate all the support you've given me, whether you've been there from Chapter One or if you read long after this Epilogue is posted

You were changed from the person you had been. If You met the You from the previous timeline, they wouldn't be able to recognize you.

The first change, and simultaneously the most and least obvious, was that you were no longer human. Outwardly you were mostly the same, you still looked like yourself barring small changes like the shape of your pupil and the fact that you were no longer made of flesh and blood, but dust and magic like very other monster.

(When you had gone to sleep the night after shattering your soul in The Void you had been an odd amalgam of human and monster, but in the night you had awoken to feel your magic burning through you and changing the mixed and matched pieces to one uniform You.

You were still unsure if it had been your healing magic coming into it's own to heal you, or if it had maybe been triggered by something else.

Maybe by a dark figure from The Void.)

The second thing that had changed was your magic. Without meaning to, you had reached to create windows to The Void a few times after your change, but instead you'd left a trail of violet fire in the air, which quickly dissipated. Any attempts to access your Void driven abilities tended to result in the same violet fire.

(After careful experimentation you'd found that instead of burning, the violet flame was actually your healing ability when it manifested outside your body. (Though, you suspected that if you focused the right way it would, in fact, burn. You did not test this, and just focused on learning to heal more effectively from Toriel) )

The third change, and the change both timeline versions of you would be happiest with, was that you were about to bind yourself, mind, body, and soul, to a short skeleton with an affinity for puns.

There were a few changes from the original plans, of course, but after a much too long delay you finally got to go through with the wedding that Sans had planned for Christmas.

~

Undyne, Papyrus, and Alphys were the first ones in the procession. After some quiet discussion between the three of them they had announced that the three of them were yours and Sans's Best Men. At the altar they arranged themselves to the right of the waiting Asgore and turned their attention back to the door.

Next came your three little siblings. Frisk, the sole ring bearer originally, was more than happy to be carrying Sans's ring with Chara carrying yours by his side. In between them, blushing a faint red, Asriel was scattering white rose petals on the aisle. They stood to Asgore's left and turned eager eyes to the doorway.

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the traditional wedding march turned on, and you and Sans appeared at the end of the aisle, Sans escorted by Gaster, and you escorted by Toriel.

You and Sans were having a hard time keeping your eyes off each other. Sans in a suit was a sight to behold and, from the way his pupils were shifting to little hearts every time he glanced at you, he didn't mind your own outfit so much either. Finally Toriel and Gaster pulled the both of you to a stop in front of Asgore.

"Who gives Sans the skeleton to be wed?" Asgore rumbled gently, smiling softly at the both of you.

"I, WD Gaster, give my son to be wed." Gaster shot you and Sans a proud smile.

"And who gives _____ to be wed?" Asgore asked, looking at Toriel cautiously.

Toriel met his eyes with a soft smile, "I, Toriel, give my child to be wed."

Toriel and Gaster placed your hand in Sans's and then retreated to the right and left respectively.

"A life is a precious thing," Asgore said, both to you and Sans, and to the gathered monsters and humans who had come to see you and Sans get married, "When two lives come together and decide to tangle their fates, it is a joy and a thing to be celebrated. Sans?"

"i will never be lost in the dark," Sans promised, "because you are my light. i'll never be alone in the night because you are my stars. i'll never leave you again, and you will never have to look far for me, because i'll be right by your side. i swear to love you, to cherish you, and to spend the rest of my existence with you." Sans turned to Chara, accepted your ring, and slipped it on your finger behind your engagement ring.

You squeezed his hand tightly, enjoying the new added weight.

"_____?" Asgore prompted.

"I will n-never have nothing, because you are m-my everything," Your voice came out low and husky as you spoke through the tight knot in your throat, "I will never despair, b-because you are my hope. I will never leave you again, and I'll n-never be too far to hear you call my name. I swear to love you, to cherish you, and to spend the rest of my existence by your side." You took Sans's ring from Frisk, carefully modified with a bit of rubber to keep it comfortably on Sans's hand, and slipped it on his finger.

"Does any monster or man have reason that these two should not join their lives together?" Asgore looked out across your audience.

Behind Sans, for just a moment, a man flickered into your vision.

Ryan smiled at you, and winked, before disappearing once more into The Void.

"By the power I hold as the King of the Monsters," Asgore continued, completely unaware of the temporary intrusion, "I pronounce these lives bound and wed."

Sans didn't hesitate to pull you tightly to him and you wrapped your arms around his shoulders and kissed him, not caring about the wolf whistles or the cheering and clapping.

Just content to be wrapped in your Husband's arms.

Of course, this was a monster wedding, so things weren't quite finished.

Toriel and Gaster gently ushered the both of you into a side room where Papyrus, Undyne, Alphys, Frisk, Chara, and Asriel were waiting for you.

 

_Bonding involved mixing your soul and magic with another monster. It was a process where you turned everything that made you you over to the other monster, and when you got your everything back it was twined with their essence._

 

"Do not worry, my little one, my Sans, we will be right here to anchor you." Gaster promised.

"It is a wonderful thing, you will have no issues." Toriel promised.

Your family beamed at you both and you turned your attention to Sans.

Undyne and Alphys had spent several days coaching you in how to summon a soul, and now, for the first time, you summoned Sans's.

It was, like all monsters, an upside down heart. The center of it shone the pure white of a real monster, a core of kindness and love, but there was a flickering sheen of dark blue coating it.

Sans beckoned and you watched your soul, pure violet, emerge from your chest.

You took a deep breath and met Sans's eyes, then the both of you pressed your souls together and you let go of your magic.

Your family melted away, the room melted away, everything in the world seemed to melt away.

All there was, was Sans.

You could feel Sans surrounding you, and at the same time you surrounded him.

You felt the emotions that had accompanied his life, the joy of younger years, the pain of losing Gaster and being the only one to remember him, the lethargy that dogged him, the anguish as Frisk and Chara slaughtered their way through the Underground, the fear as they returned only slightly more merciful, the joy as they freed him. You felt his anxiety on the surface world, slowly fading away into a familiar lethargy, and then curiosity as a human pointedly ignored him nearly to the point of hostility, but was kind and open with his friends. The curiosity turning into a determined game to make the human acknowledge him, then to friendship when they finally gave in, and then to love the more he got to know them.

Terror. Pain. Anguish. His human was gone, was dead.

A thread of hope, of maybe as the world reset.

Anxiety again, and then pain and determination to keep his human safe and whole this time, layered with heartache because he couldn't bring himself to go through the game again.

A thread of hope as you weren't closed off to him as you had been originally. You were almost like the person who had died, just without the experiences between you.

Terror at finding you missing on Thursday, relief that you were fine.

Terror when you fell sick, into his arms. Terror holding as you were unconscious for days and the hospital refused to tell him anything. Relief when you woke up. Joy, because you loved him. Guilt because you didn't know he'd gotten you killed once before.

Every emotion he'd felt since he'd met you, the overwhelming panic of Frisk appearing in the embassy without you, the mind numbing depressing of spending almost two months looking for you. The absolute adoration at seeing you again, even though your eyes were black as The Void and you were bleeding.

The moment his eyes met yours before a bullet eradicated him.

Standing in front of you in The Void filled with so much love for you, and then more mind numbing panic as he realized you'd sacrificed part of your soul for him.

Hope.

Wonder.

Love.

Relief.

And then the same overwhelming adoration.

Everything around you was Sans, and Sans was your everything. You never wanted to let go, never wanted to lose this feeling.

"Come back _____." A soft voice called.

You wanted to protest.

"COME BACK TO US SANS."

You wanted to keep Sans here with you.

"Come my child, back to where you belong." Toriel coaxed.

A far away part of you sighed, but you listened to your mother and untangled yourself from Sans, taking just the tiniest bit of him with you and leaving a part of yourself behind, in return.

You opened your eyes, not sure when you'd closed them. Sans was in your arms, and this was something else you couldn't remember happening, but you held him tighter nonetheless.

"Did they do it?" Asriel asked quietly.

"Sans isn't purple anymore, and _____ isn't blue." Chara replied at the same volume.

You felt the faintest impression of amusement from Sans and grinned at him, then your siblings.

Frisk was wiggling his eyebrows at you.

“Yes, we’re b-back Azzy.” You assured him.

“YOU WERE SUCCESSFULLY BONDED?” Papyrus confirmed.

“i’d say so bro.” Sans grinned at you.

Undyne let out a loud whoop and scooped Alphys up.

Papyrus high-fived Chara, Frisk, and Asriel one after another and then all four of them went down in a pile of new siblingness.

You grinned at them and Sans put a hand under your chin and pulled you back to him, kissing you fervently.

And maybe the world wasn’t entirely perfect, there were still pockets of intolerance, everyone had emotional scars to be worked out, people had died to get you to where you were, and there was no telling what Ryan was going to be doing in The Void or what having a soul made entirely of Void would do to him, but there was nothing that couldn’t be worked through later.

So you kissed your skeleton husband, and enjoyed the family you had chosen.

And you lived Happily Ever After.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it then.  
> Sans and Reader go on to live their lives, and in some worlds they have little skeleton/human looking babies, and in some worlds they live together happily until they both fade into dust.
> 
> For those of you who are interested in the Deleted Scenes oneshot, or in the next story I'm brainstorming you can find me at sincidentsans.tumblr.com


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